Hey<3
Jerking his arms off her, Ishqi ran back to the resort, occasionally wiping her cheeks to get rid of any tear stains. Reaching her room, she unlocked the door and once she entered and shut it close, slid down against it.
Within the confined privacy of her room, she let out the feelings from the innermost depths of her heart in the form of -not words, not happiness- tears.
She could take it no more. She'd been hiding her feelings, from herself too, all along. Her resolve had broken right then and there.
Kya tumhe kuch kehna hain?
His voice played continuously, his face appearing at the back of her mind. What was this dilemma? Why did she have to harbour feelings for a guy who, not only was her fiancé's best friend, but also the very same who seemed to hate her.
Did he?
His actions screamed nothing but unwavering care and pure adoration. And unconditional love. No. Love? It seems impossible. It is impossible.
Kya tumhe kuch kehna hain? Yes! She had so much to say. So many questions to ask, so much to confess. But at the end of the day, her feelings were meant to remain hers only.
Kya tumhe kuch kehna hain? Those words. As much as his words soothed her aching heart, as much as it brought a ray of light into the dark abyss her heart had drowned into; she knew he wouldn't take her honest thoughts too good. She knew AVM well enough to know he wouldn't compromise on his family values for the sake of some petty feelings.
Or did she?
His eyes. His eyes were the window to his heart and soul, baring the thoughts and feelings he never had the courage to verbally utter. His eyes screamed of a barely survivable heartbreak hearing what she said. His eyes had seemed to lose all life when she jerked his arms away.
No! No, she definitely was imagining things. Why else, would he hug that Rhea? Why else would he be elated to be announcing his marriage with her? Why else would he say he didn't want to hear anything, when asked. Aapko kuch sunna hai? Nahi.
"Ma." She whispered, her one word sentence heavily resonating in the thick air, "I wish you were beside me. I don't think I've ever missed you or needed you any more than I do now. How I wish, you were there to help me understand what it is that I'm feeling, what it is that I'm going through."
"Ma, how did I fall in love with him? Most importantly, why? If I was meant to fall in love with him, why then did I have to get engaged to Mayank? Why does he have to take his relationship with Rhea to the step level?"
Jaise maine iss ring ko protect kiya, vaise hi, main tumhe humesha protect karna chahta hoon.
She closed her eyes still feeling Ahaan's fingers gently yet firmly hold her hand as he slipped the ring onto her finger. "He confessed wanting to protect me his entire life, why then does he not remember what he wants?"
Maine yeh sab kuch tumhare liye kiya. I don't like holi, I just don't like it. Aur colours toh bilkul nai pasand mujhe. Phir bhi maine yeh sab plan kiya, sir tumhare liye.
Yeh dekho, see I'm touching it.
She felt her heart pace, still feeling his hued fingers rubbing the colour of love on to her cheek, she could still feel his breath hit her face as he whispered Happy Holi in her ear.
Ideally mujhe tumse, na, milna hi nai chahiye, tumse door rehna chahiye, tumhari shakal tak nai dekhni chahiye. Lekin pata hain kya hota hain, jab main tumhari shakal nai dekhta toh tumhe palat ke dekhne ka mann karta hain. Fikr hoti hain tumhari. Aisa lagta hain ki tum theek ho ya nai ho. Bohot fikr hoti hain mujhe tumhari.
He was there for her every time she felt she'd have to handle her problems alone. Unknowingly though, but it was because of his letter that the passers-by knew why she fainted. Despite his anger, it was he who protected her Maasi's dignity by giving her the ring. He quietly drank the salty tea she prepared, he made sure her mehndi was done before Sarla could interfere again, he stood by her side during the sangeet, it was him who called to inquire whether she was okay or not the day Maasi was admitted in hospital, it was him who paid the deposit of the flat, it was him who looked after her throughout the night, it was him who made sure she didn't cause too much of a drama in an inebriated state.
It was always him. Standing by her side, being a support to hold onto.
But he'll no more be there for her, once she gets married to Mayank. And she felt her heart dip at the thought, and more tears spilled down her cheeks.
"Ahaan." His name felt like a prayer, it brought a sense of bitter-sweetness to her tongue, "Why did you have to make your way into my heart, when we both knew you can never become its permanent resident? Why did you have to become the reason of both my happiness and grief, excitement and distress, my laughter and tears? If we aren't meant to be, why did you occupy the whole of my heart, not ready to return it back to me? Why am I crying on the eve of my wedding for you? For someone who doesn't see me anything more than Mayank's fiance, someone who's excitedly planning on spending the rest of his life with a girl. A girl that's not me."
"Why, Ahaan, why?" She let her tears do the rest of the talking, for her quivering lips gave up on her.
Just like how everything beautiful and special did.
°•°•°•°•°•○•°•°•°•°•°
On the other hand, unknown to her, sat Ahaan by the pool, the very same that witnessed the very best moments of his life. Chaliye na, chapad chapad karte hai. AVM smile kar rahe hain? Yayy! AVM smile kar rahe hai! Naam teen banda mean smile kar rahe hai, AVM! A sad smile tugged the corners of his lips.
Only if life had stood still then.
He'd cherish every nanosecond of it.
Meri shaadi aapse kyu nai ho rahi hain, AVM?
Mistake se aayi, luck se aayi, jaise bhi aayi- lekin feelings aayi toh.
Hum donon ke beech chemistry hain.
Mujhe Mayank ke liye kuch nai hota hain. Aap ke liye hota hain.
No! He snapped out of it. She's committed to marry his best friend. They're engaged, for God's sake! She's about to become Mrs Mayank Mehra in less than 24 hours. He hated to admit, but he felt his heart dip at the thought. And then comes Rhea. They've been dating for two years, albeit they were more friends than a couple, but she still expected them moving forward in their relationship. He cannot possibly betray these two, can he?
But by not confessing your love you're about to deceive not only yourself, but Ishqi, Rhea and Mayank too. Isn't that worse?
Aapke dil mein Ishqi ke liye feelings hain Bhai, issi liye aapko uski pareshani samajh mein aati hai. Koi aur nai kahenga, isi liye main keh raha hoon; abhi bhi time hain. Apni feelings ko accept karlo.
Yes. He finally admitted he had fallen in love with the extra irritating, extra loud and extra extrovert Ishqi. How, when and why- don't ask him. Bas pyaar hua. Letting out a staggered breath as he ran his hand down his face, wondering how and why God let him into a maze that seemed to have no exit to get out of.
Training his eyes back to his reflection in the pool, his heart and mind couldn't help but reiterate the happenings of that night.
Meri shaadi aapse kyu nai ho rahi hain, AVM?
"You've no idea Ishqi, how much I wish you were mine, how I wish these wedding festivities were planned for our wedding." He then remembered the Baba's words who called them a jodi. Tum donon apni jodi kyu nai banate? "If only it was as easy as it sounds," he chuckled sardonically.
Mistake se aayi, luck se aayi, jaisi bhi aayi- lekin feelings aayi toh.
"How I wish the feelings that seemed impossible to creep their way into my heart a month back, weren't meant to stay buried in my heart. How I wish, I didn't have to hide, what you call, the purest of emotions."
Hum donon ke beech chemistry hain.
They had chemistry, yes they did. They were two polar opposites, bound to get attracted; but chemistry had another rule too. Matter can neither be created nor destroyed. And in their case, their destiny was that matter. Mayank was her destiny and Rhea, his. And as much as he wanted to, neither could he destroy their destiny nor could he recreate it.
Mujhe Mayank ke liye kuch nai hota hain. Aapke liye hota hain.
He felt those very same feelings too. Love, attraction, desire, care; all that he was supposed to feel for Rhea but hadn't in two years of their relationship, he felt it for Ishqi- his best friend's fiancee- within a few weeks.
Shaadi ke khushiyon se zyada, darr hain unhe khone ka.
He never felt as scared as he did in the last few hours, at any time of his life. Not even when he realised he'd had to shoulder Sonu's upbringing, not even when 4 year old Sonu fell from the swing, not even when he thought he didn't live up to Dadi's expectations. The fear he felt then, ate his insides like slow acid. In less than 24 hours, she will no longer be Ms Ishqi, but Mrs- she'd be married. They'd probably meet, but never talk. He'd never get to gaze at her with any such emotions. It's all over.
Everything is over.
Har ladki meri tarah lucky nai hoti.
"And not everyone is as unlucky as me who's destined to lose everyone I love unconditionally. First Ma, and now, you."
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Both sat under the blanket of stars that twinkled away in pride yet couldn't manage in lighting up their lives. With a heavy sigh and an even heavier heart, Ahaan walked back into the resort's main building while Ishqi closed the curtains of her room.
They happened to miss the moon, that was hiding behind the mass of clouds, wink roguishly; for the universe that spun their love story millenia ago, knew it was high time for the love birds to finally unite.
I don't know what I wrote ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
It's shizz, I know.
However, hope you enjoyed the read!
Hit the vote button and leave a bunch of comments, pretty pleeeaasseee *insert puppy eyes*
°•°•°Sprinkles fairy dust!°•°•°
°•°•° LostInWanderlust °•°•°
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