Member Topic: Have you Dealt W Depression/Anxiety/Insomnia - Page 6

Originally posted by: Maroonporsche

I don’t know. I’m having a kid soon. An that’s wild. But like I got insurance and doctors An I live in a joint family so I’m gonna have plenty of help. I try to sleep by 9/10 pm an sometimes I sleep thru the night and sometimes randomly get up at like 430 am and can’t get back to sleep.

You don't even have to worry about the kid. Your wife and joint family gonna take care of everything and love the baby. You just have to be there for the baby. That's all that's needed. If you are sleeping from 9 till 4.30 that's like more than seven hours. It's enough. Why do you even want to sleep after that? Just wake up and exercise or meditation.

But you said it has been going on since five years now. The baby news is new only. So that can't be the only reason for stress right? Maybe it's the after effects of the old stress you had then and chronic insomnia of five years that still you still wake up randomly in your sleep. So it's like you are almost cured. I don't think baby should be the reason for the stress at all. You are easily going to take up the responsibility of a kid. Be confident of yourself. Reading your posts since long, I think I know you must be quite mature in life. Try to chill and relax.

Everything is beautiful right now and everything is going to be even more beautiful tomorrow.

Originally posted by: heartbleed

You don't even have to worry about the kid. Your wife and joint family gonna take care of everything and love the baby. You just have to be there for the baby. That's all that's needed. If you are sleeping from 9 till 4.30 that's like more than seven hours. It's enough. Why do you even want to sleep after that? Just wake up and exercise or meditation.

But you said it has been going on since five years now. The baby news is new only. So that can't be the only reason for stress right? Maybe it's the after effects of the old stress you had then and chronic insomnia of five years that still you still wake up randomly in your sleep. So it's like you are almost cured. I don't think baby should be the reason for the stress at all. You are easily going to take up the responsibility of a kid. Be confident of yourself. Reading your posts since long, I think I know you must be quite mature in life. Try to chill and relax.

Everything is beautiful right now and everything is going to be even more beautiful tomorrow.

No not 5 years. I had some depression in 2016/2017 but I got over it. Ive had insomnia maybe since I was a kid. Even if its small form maybe one night every 2 months I just couldn't get to sleep. Now last few months maybe more nights like this. An your right 7 hours is plenty. But I could use 9/10 hours some times. There are nights I sleep for 3/4 hours wake up and cant sleep again

Originally posted by: Maroonporsche

Well I have 7.5 month pregnant wife

Don’t know if it’s possible but I’ll try 😂

Hey that should not stop you at all. My bhabhi said that she and my bro had some amazing times when she was in her third trimester. He had made a quick trip from his army posting, i of course didn’t ask details - don’t want to know if it’s my brother in the mix 🤮

Talk to your wife, just the same way you are opening up here. Sometimes our partners turn out to be even more supportive. Women while they are pregnant actually get tired of all the molly coddling, so if she feels like she can help you out, she may actually welcome that.
It’s very possible your insomnia is connected to your worries about your child. When my bhabhi was pregnant and I was going through some rough times, I swear I thought I would be bad influence for the baby. When my nephew came I realized, children only respond and recognize love. They don’t know you are going through shit Nd they don’t care, Buss hold them and that love just transfers.

good luck, we have never interacted much, but I want to commend you for starting this thread. I hope you find your peace bro.

Originally posted by: columbia

good luck, we have never interacted much, but I want to commend you for starting this thread. I hope you find your peace bro.

I pretty much found peace on anxiety and depression

Its just sometimes the insomnia

What an amazing topic.

I have had breathing issues since the past 2 years , and I have just been diagnosed with anxiety disorder after a truckload of tests.

I have been told to be happy, to see the positive side of things,the usual," oh your too young for this".But I dont know how that's helpful.

Also been told to look for triggers because my life is not conventionally bad in any way, need to retrospect and figure out.

Originally posted by: pathaka

I have anxiety and it has been controlling every single aspect of my life

My relationship with parents, friends , siblings , studies, work life ...

I have anxiety attacks, difficulty breathing, panic attacks almost every few months ...change scares the crap out of me but without change, I stagnate which in turn makes be feel “stuck” in one spot and sad...again triggering anxiety ...I’m in a loop atm that I can’t get out of

I don’t even want to get into a relationship with someone because I don’t want them to put up with my mess ...my own family seems to be sick of my constant meltdowns so I don’t have high hopes on some outsider putting up with all of it

I want to experience love, peace, calm but sometimes I feel I might not be destined for it

This sounds silly and awful but seeing happy couples on social media or otherwise makes me miserable because I feel I can never have that

I want to have kids but who wants a mess of a mother who can’t control her own emotions

I slog my ass of at work and perform well but I also burnout...I slog my way through burnout because my job is literally the only thing I have that isn’t falling apart (yet) and the tiny bit of self respect I have comes from the fact that I earn money

I’ve been trying cognitive behavioural therapy...Which helped but not as much as would like ..maybe it takes time

I just hate how everything in my life right now takes such a long time ....feels like a never ending road of struggle

*end of sad rant

You would be a great caring mom.

Originally posted by: fruitshake

Hi Pathaka!

I feel you!! I have been suffering from anxiety, severe overthinking of worst scenarios and constant meltdowns about my lack of social skills and the lack of control I have, how my efforts at work won't be credited at all which in turn extremely demotivates me to put any effort towards my work and other career fields.

I have suffered a lot since my college and university days due to my introvert nature and many times when I was the sole doer of many projects, tasks, I was neglected and overlooked many times. So, I am still stuck at that state where my existence and work just is not appreciated. I am amicable, polite and friendly but awkward and shy. So, despite my best efforts at forming friendships and other relationships, I did not receive the same care, love, consideration and was left behind many times. This, in turn, made me seen as a loner in my life. Its just that I don't want to compromise on my ethics, values while dealing with others and prefer not to mingle with those crowds.

I just have terrible anxiety about things which won't happen in reality. I makeup many cases where I will lose everything, left behind by others, disrespected and taken advantage by others, bad things will happen to me etc. I have suffered from some of those things before but now even when I am in a better place, those past actions by other people still haunt me. I have tried to console myself that I am different now and can handle things and those things will not happen now and it's all in my mind only, but for godsake I can't move from that state and thought process. Its a never ending loop.

I feel terrible when my relatives bring up marriage to tease me now that I am past 25, but I don't feel grown enough to share my life with another being. I love being in my own zone and its very very essential that the other individual also has the same thought process, values, interests, and open mind like mine. I can't image doing social functions in general and being in another family is a far cry. The thought alone fuels my anxiety.

Sorry for my long rant. I had to get it out my chest. But, I am happy that your are doing your therapy and wish you all the calmness, growth, prosperity and most importantly peace and satisfaction in your personal and work life. You are not alone Pathaka and marriage and kids are the end of it all.

I have seen many unhappy marriages and at the end our personal growth and state of mind matters the most. I feel we will surely attain that desired peace, care and our goals at one stage and it begins with self care. So, its okay to just take our time and do things at a normal pace and instead focus on ourselves from time to time. Sometimes, on our day offs we come across with unexpected things which could add to our wellbeing. I wish I could take therapy as well but currently there are just not such clinics and credible professionals in my surroundings at all. But I intend to look for therapy in different place in future. But, don't compare yourself with other individuals for your self worth. We are built differently and intended for good things in different ways. Wishing you your good things to occur soon!

That's quite a relatable story. Lot's of love and care to each member who are facing their own challenges so fiercely.

We all have done it and can keep doing it.

Originally posted by: Maroonporsche

What ? Care to elaborate ?

So it was the time when I took coaching for my engineering entrance. I went to kota with my best friend of then. And I don't know whether you know or not but studies in kota are quite different than what we do in schools so a brilliant student in school can't be expected to give similar performance there.

So we both used to secure first or second rank since class 6th till 10th but in kota I started scoring great marks and person Y, not that great. We used to stay in a single room and he started ignoring me. There was this one more guy who wasn't very sharp too and they both started belittling me. Even being in 11 th class I had a height of something 4'3ish so was quite a kid and hadn't hit the puberty. They used to mock me for that they what will happen of u and your family . Gradually person Y stopped talking to me completely and I became isolated in that while floor.

My performance deteriorated, I started crying and stopped eating food regularly. My parents started worrying a lot and I actually thought o running somewhere as I was hurting my parents a lot. It took a toll on my studies a lot.

It continued for 3-4 months. My dad used to stay with me and it was the only other time I saw him crying after my grandfather's death. I was shattered.

But then came a ray of hope in terms of a friend in my coaching batch. He started talking to me and asked me why u keep crying even in classes. He didn't expected answer but just was there. He asked to visit his home and meet his mother. I started liking that surrounding. It was a small cosy house and his mom was so caring. Whenever I visited their house she cared a lot and my healing started little bit.

Again my dad came to kota and this time my friend's mom suggested that I should immediately change my room and she even found a room for me near her house. I shifted immediately but that crying was still on but was reducing . The house which I rented again was of angels. That family was so good that they never let me feel a stranger. I became part of that family and gradually I started recovering. I lost my whole 11th class studies and got fine numbers in 12 th.

But as you know JEE is a tough examination so I couldn't make it the first time, but second time I got a 3 digit rank and is one of my favourite achievement.

I wanted to end this story little early but then I thought that I should be focusing more on the recovering part.

Now that family is part of my life. I was invited in the wedding of their son and visited kita recently.

Penning this down was heavy and it feels great. I know these kind of stories help a lot so sorry if I went overboard and wrote an essay.

😊

Originally posted by: TMKOC_MY

Penning this down was heavy and it feels great. I know these kind of stories help a lot so sorry if I went overboard and wrote an essay.

😊

No it’s good to hear this stuff

I have been diagnosed generalised anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder for 9 years now. I have come a long way and have accepted that I have these disorders. They are a part of me. I have survived many suicide attempts and have been free from harming myself for 3 years now. I don’t know if it’s a big achievement, to me it is. I hope to continue doing things for myself and being happy. To those who are still struggling, accept and embrace them and do things for yourself on your own. All the best!