Vanraj’s character and Anupama’s’ mistake

I have been thinking about Vanraj’s character

Not defending anyone just putting my thoughts out there

Anyone has the right to like or not like someone.
No-one should be forced to stick to bad relationships. If for whatever reasons justifiable or not he does not like Anupama he should have the right to move on. Divorce is legal and everyone is entitled to that.

Vanraj has been a good provider a good son a good father. Cares about how his family feels about him. Many pluses. He just hates Anupama.

I feel she encouraged this behavior for so long. Could she not have changed a little bit. The kids would insult her Baa insults her and she would put up with all this for this all along i would ask why.
Are we saying it is ok to put up with all the abuse until husband cheats. She has acted stupid all along.
I want women like Anupama if they exist to revolt from the begetting and not let things come to this point. She should have spoken against Baa and kids also when they were insulting her. Even now she is all about Baa i don’t get why. She has done nothing mother like
And gets so much respect.

Anupama is paying price for being blind fir 25 years. Serves her right.

Again not saying Vanraj’s behavior is justified. He should have taken divorce and married Kavya. Anupama also should not have trusted everyone blindly. Writing was on the wall and she decided not to read. She cannot go blame free.

Originally posted by: curious1

I have been thinking about Vanraj’s character

Not defending anyone just putting my thoughts out there

Anyone has the right to like or not like someone.
No-one should be forced to stick to bad relationships. If for whatever reasons justifiable or not he does not like Anupama he should have the right to move on. Divorce is legal and everyone is entitled to that.

Vanraj has been a good provider a good son a good father. Cares about how his family feels about him. Many pluses. He just hates Anupama.

I feel she encouraged this behavior for so long. Could she not have changed a little bit. The kids would insult her Baa insults her and she would put up with all this for this all along i would ask why.
Are we saying it is ok to put up with all the abuse until husband cheats. She has acted stupid all along.
I want women like Anupama if they exist to revolt from the begetting and not let things come to this point. She should have spoken against Baa and kids also when they were insulting her. Even now she is all about Baa i don’t get why. She has done nothing mother like
And gets so much respect.

Anupama is paying price for being blind fir 25 years. Serves her right.

Again not saying Vanraj’s behavior is justified. He should have taken divorce and married Kavya. Anupama also should not have trusted everyone blindly. Writing was on the wall and she decided not to read. She cannot go blame free.

Rural areas like small towns still have Anu kind of people and personally I know few they try with me too but I rebel and lucky enough to leave country...my MIL was worst then baa still my hubby (we didn't go for divorce)all 3 other brothers like Vee🤢But all bhabhis are like log kya kahenge, bache kya sochenge kind mentality so only big city Might be changing but still small town and village carrying same traditions

Why anupama quite before that was her love for vanraj which making her to tolerate vanraj insult and all

As many say love is blind tab anupama dont know vanraj cheating on her now she know that why would she tolerate all this ? There is no reason for this now tab love ke wajah se she was quiet second why anupama tolerate baa becoz anupama know baa love her i knw baa have big mouth and strict as saas but some where baa like anupama as bahu bas wo clearly dekha thi nahi

I blame vanraj here fully anupama is ideal daughter.in.law she fulfil her all duties with honesty leave her dream for shah family

Anupama is perfect wife

Perfect mother

Perfect daughter.in.law

Perfect cook

Loyal wife

Caring wife

Loving wife

Perfect dancer

Anupama ko english nahi ate but she can read hindi

Itne saare qualities ke baad bhi vanraj ko sirf anupama ke mistake nazar ate han yes vanraj

Have right not to stick in bad relationship he should think about this before marrying an girl and destroying her life

Boy ke shaadi tod jaye they can easily get another girl for married but ek girl ke zindagi toh barbaad hote hain na

Shaadi se phele vanraj should force her parents i dnt want to marry shayad abhi anu ko aise husband milta who love her or respect her

Even vanraj dont love anupama but he cant tolerate anu ko koi pasand kare u remember that epi where vanraj dont like it at when he heard in schools days someone love anupama crazily

Hud kare teek dusra kare wrong

Originally posted by: curious1

I have been thinking about Vanraj’s character

Not defending anyone just putting my thoughts out there

Anyone has the right to like or not like someone.
No-one should be forced to stick to bad relationships. If for whatever reasons justifiable or not he does not like Anupama he should have the right to move on. Divorce is legal and everyone is entitled to that.

Vanraj has been a good provider a good son a good father. Cares about how his family feels about him. Many pluses. He just hates Anupama.

I feel she encouraged this behavior for so long. Could she not have changed a little bit. The kids would insult her Baa insults her and she would put up with all this for this all along i would ask why.
Are we saying it is ok to put up with all the abuse until husband cheats. She has acted stupid all along.
I want women like Anupama if they exist to revolt from the begetting and not let things come to this point. She should have spoken against Baa and kids also when they were insulting her. Even now she is all about Baa i don’t get why. She has done nothing mother like
And gets so much respect.

Anupama is paying price for being blind fir 25 years. Serves her right.

Again not saying Vanraj’s behavior is justified. He should have taken divorce and married Kavya. Anupama also should not have trusted everyone blindly. Writing was on the wall and she decided not to read. She cannot go blame free.

I am sorry buddy, you might not like my thoughts but putting it out anyway. to me, It seems you are defending Vanraj. No offense again.

He has the right to like someone correct - but he doesn't have any right to cheat on his spouse. Any legal court in the world doesn't support cheating.

Serves her right you say? --- Dude that is called victim shaming or blaming. This is nothing different than what Vanraj has been doing since everyone found out!

So you are saying every girl out there should be on watch every damn time. If someone is a bit nice, can't talk back so it is alright to bully her because apparently, it is their fault that they can't talk back!!

I agree that she should have fought back, but that is me 21st generation young girl talking. I am taught and brought up that way. You are forgetting Anu is her 40's, she is brought up with the idea of being nice to family no matter what, keeping the family together, and all that sacrificing BS. But she is changing now, and she is learning to fight back for the right cause. And that is going to take time. We all did not learn the entire math overnight. That is the whole point of the show - women empowerment!

Even if someone is stupid and extra nice - that doesn't give any damn person any right to bully, play with someone's emotions and their rights. Yes as a married couple, they are ought to be loyal and trusting of each other!!. Marriage's basic foundation is trust! It is, and it is only the fault of people who wronged her. Period.

She doesn't deserve any of Vanraj's crap!

We as a society should not blame victims. When you are strong, well educated - you should support those who are weak and who don't know well.

Originally posted by: piyu008

I am sorry buddy, you might not like my thoughts but putting it out anyway. to me, It seems you are defending Vanraj. No offense again.

He has the right to like someone correct - but he doesn't have any right to cheat on his spouse. Any legal court in the world doesn't support cheating.

Serves her right you say? --- Dude that is called victim shaming or blaming. This is nothing different than what Vanraj has been doing since everyone found out!

So you are saying every girl out there should be on watch every damn time. If someone is a bit nice, can't talk back so it is alright to bully her because apparently, it is their fault that they can't talk back!!

I agree that she should have fought back, but that is me 21st generation young girl talking. I am taught and brought up that way. You are forgetting Anu is her 40's, she is brought up with the idea of being nice to family no matter what, keeping the family together, and all that sacrificing BS. But she is changing now, and she is learning to fight back for the right cause. And that is going to take time. We all did not learn the entire math overnight. That is the whole point of the show - women empowerment!

Even if someone is stupid and extra nice - that doesn't give any damn person any right to bully, play with someone's emotions and their rights. Yes as a married couple, they are ought to be loyal and trusting of each other!!. Marriage's basic foundation is trust! It is, and it is only the fault of people who wronged her. Period.

She doesn't deserve any of Vanraj's crap!

We as a society should not blame victims. When you are strong, well educated - you should support those who are weak and who don't know well.

Very well written 👏

But after watching today’s epi I mean Monday episode I want stuppid vanraj go to ka UA and then starting trouble in paradise for him with kavya 👻👻😹

Idk why is it so common these days to put the entire blame on the victim. I mean everyone can't be bold and strong and can't have flourishing career. Some people don't succed in life and they're weak, delusional, submissive that doesn't mean that people have the right to betray them. Anupama has her premises and she was brought up like that. She was taught to sacrifice. She did her best to fulfill all of her responsibilities. Vanraj should have divorced her instead of cheating on her. Any Comment that justifies infidelity is very very disrespectful. No one has the right to cheat mo matter what the situation is. Glorification of infidelity in the name of so called love is disgusting.

Vanraj doesn't care abour his family at all. If he cared, he would have made appointments for Bapuji, he wouldn’t have blackmailed anupama by saying he'll kick out Samar out of the house, he wouldn’t have let Toshu's engagement be broken for his affair, wouldn’t have manipulated Toshu, he wouldn’t have blamed the mother of his child in front of them. He would have shown a little bit of shame in front of Sanjay thinking about his sister's image. He just pretends to care for his family and wants them to be with him for his so called Pride. He wants to show the world that he's got a perfect family that's all. In fact he's lying to himself that he loves his family.

He should have thought about his own happiness instead of depending on other people. He could have chosen his own life partner, why depend on his dadi to choose a life partner for him. Okay he couldn’t but atleast Could have divorced anupama before having an affair with kavya. That coward didn’t have the audacity to fight for his own happiness then how can he put the blame on anupama.

Anupama was blind but did vanraj ever try to make anupama realize that it's not working? Instead he encouraged this behaviour and manipulated anupama to thinking that they have this perfect relationship. He wanted a servant for free. If he had told anupama atleast she could have filed a divorce but no the coward didn’t do it. Did he ever let Anupama do anything besides household chores? Did he let her step out of the house and gave her time to upgrade herself?

Even after anu Saying that he can marry kavya and can divorce her, that coward couldn’t do it. He's a horrible human, husband, boyfriend, father, son.

That coward doesn’t have the guts to take a Stand for his happiness and doesn’t want to take any responsiblity for his action.

He can only blame, insult, blackmail and manipulate others.

Just two things I want to point out:

It's easier to blame people than accept our own faults. That's how an egoistic person is - i.e Vanraj.

It is easier to be quiet and tolerate than speak up against our loved ones. This is how a selfless person is - i.e Anupama.

When an egoistic person meets selfless - the selfless will suffer as they will always put others before themself and accept their fate without arguing just to avoid any trouble. And Egoistic will keep on oppressing.

Sadly, it still happens in rural and smaller villages. And it's easy for us to just say why can't Anupama stand up, why didn't she speak up, but doing it, in reality, is much harder especially at her age. She is not an independent person, her whole life is just family. Nobody let her do what she wanted so she herself doesn't know her worth!

You can only stand up for yourself and speak against them if you first believe in yourself and know your value.

Originally posted by: Annie_13

Idk why is it so common these days to put the entire blame on the victim. I mean everyone can't be bold and strong and can't have flourishing career. Some people don't succed in life and they're weak, delusional, submissive that doesn't mean that people have the right to betray them. Anupama has her premises and she was brought up like that. She was taught to sacrifice. She did her best to fulfill all of her responsibilities. Vanraj should have divorced her instead of cheating on her. Any Comment that justifies infidelity is very very disrespectful. No one has the right to cheat mo matter what the situation is. Glorification of infidelity in the name of so called love is disgusting.

Vanraj doesn't care abour his family at all. If he cared, he would have made appointments for Bapuji, he wouldn’t have blackmailed anupama by saying he'll kick out Samar out of the house, he wouldn’t have let Toshu's engagement be broken for his affair, wouldn’t have manipulated Toshu, he wouldn’t have blamed the mother of his child in front of them. He would have shown a little bit of shame in front of Sanjay thinking about his sister's image. He just pretends to care for his family and wants them to be with him for his so called Pride. He wants to show the world that he's got a perfect family that's all. In fact he's lying to himself that he loves his family.

He should have thought about his own happiness instead of depending on other people. He could have chosen his own life partner, why depend on his dadi to choose a life partner for him. Okay he couldn’t but atleast Could have divorced anupama before having an affair with kavya. That coward didn’t have the audacity to fight for his own happiness then how can he put the blame on anupama.

Anupama was blind but did vanraj ever try to make anupama realize that it's not working? Instead he encouraged this behaviour and manipulated anupama to thinking that they have this perfect relationship. He wanted a servant for free. If he had told anupama atleast she could have filed a divorce but no the coward didn’t do it. Did he ever let Anupama do anything besides household chores? Did he let her step out of the house and gave her time to upgrade herself?

Even after anu Saying that he can marry kavya and can divorce her, that coward couldn’t do it. He's a horrible human, husband, boyfriend, father, son.

That coward doesn’t have the guts to take a Stand for his happiness and doesn’t want to take any responsiblity for his action.

He can only blame, insult, blackmail and manipulate others.

1000% agreed!! 👏

@bold - Exactly! He doesn't care about anyone except his reputation!!

Providing money and shelter does not automatically make him a good son or good father. He has done no meaningful things for his family. He doesn't even get invovled with his family matters, He is just a robot that prints out money. Does he take time out from office to spend quality time with his family? Does he ever ask his children how their school is going, or attend any events with family?

I get it , vanraj doesnt like Anupama. Why did he put up with her for all these years ? 25 years ? Being an educated working man , he must be sure of his choices or was he married at gun point? She doesnt deserve this humiliation bec he likes some particular kind of women . Dont put the other person through hell for what u want. Free them and free yourself. Dont have kids with that woman . The basis of husband wife relationship is foremost love and respect. If that's absent everything else is worthless , and never culminate into anything.