Parent's phyl/behaviour history is imp?

Parents might have a physical deformity like crooked eye's, but child might not be having same.

Parents might have history of crime or infidelity but child is clean.

Well child might not have any problems but there is gene factor that the next generation might be impacted and some characteristics of grand parents, on this pretext should marraige decisions be based ? I mean if the guy's father has crooked eye's or is separated due to wrong doing, even tho, guy is good still he/she(gender unbiased) shouldn't be considered as potential spouse ???

Originally posted by: Gauri_3

as far as divorced or separated parents. well, our culture still associates these things with lack of values. therefore, it is assumed that kids will not have those values either. it is a generalization and shd not be there but then there r cases where the divorce is due to one parent's shortcomings in nature or values. in this case, it is okay to be a little aprehensive as children do tend to imbibe what their parents do day in and day out.

Exactly! I think every person should be judged on their own, not based on the parent. But unfortunately this happens...

But I have seen this one case of arranged marriage for my cousin sis, where her friends were teasing my cousin about her prospective groom because his dad was bald at an early age😕😆

Originally posted by: Madmadgirl

What was that famous line from the film "Awaara"??
Something about neki ka beta nek, aur chor dakuon ka beta chor daku.......
I'm sure I've got the line wrong but that film proved the point well.

Originally posted by: Gauri_3

rth, i just love reading ur views...even when they r so politically correct 😆 with u on people can change. on mental connection and clicking with someone - well, these things r not that feasible when one goes for an arranged marriage...like many do in india.

You know personally, I am a fan of arranged marriage. Parents and family usually are good resources to match you with the right kind of person. Most importantly no guessing on where the relationship is going.

It completely depends on the families arranging the marriage. To me mental connection is the most important thing in marriage. Like Jackie Shroff says in Yaadein 'when you marry you marry the entire family'. This is espescially true in Indian families. Which is why a personality match with most people is important.

As for people changing I would not expect any family to marry someone they are not sure off. A divorcee maybe a great person, or a person who cheated may have changed - but if you have a traditional view and want someone more reliable then thats what you must do. When you doubt the integrity of a person, the relationship has got a shaky foundation - it will be difficult to build on. At the same time know who you are getting married to, nobody advertises their flaws.

PS: You must be the first person to call me PC - most people vote me most likely to die lynched by a mob.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Children are not mere reflections of their parents but personalities on their own.

100% agree with you on this RTH

One example that comes to mind for me is Olivia Benson, even though fictional the character proves that people can mold their own lives. Her mother is an alcoholic, her father is unknown - a stranger who had raped her mother. Who knew that a child of a rapist and alcoholic could grow up to be a great cop.

Absolutely noone - but shouldnt the odds be the same as for anyone else???

Does her background play a part in this??? Or is it simply a red herring? I say the latter.

😡M😡