Abir - the family guy??? - Page 7

Hi everyone...I see some super duper discussions happening on Abir😊

Looks like I don't have to say much after Vaishu and Uru's amazing posts, but still I may have a few points to sum up.

but before I do that, can I just request one thing;

I understand @aqua (Pihu) and a few others have stated a rather contrasting and perhaps contentious argument in regards to many of our comprehension of Abir's character.

But

please we don't need to 'attack' or bombard this thread with counter posts of 'WeloveAbir'

see, don't take me wrong (those who know me, will understand how much I value abir and mishti individually as well as a couple), but there is no need to 'throw' these defensive attitudes towards other forum members who are expressing their views (whether you feel their opinion is wrong or right), all you need to do is simply/politely express your agreeing or contrasting views and leave it it at that. Instead by constantly re-iterating your point with extra media posts, is just creating a very defensive vibe from us Abir supporters.

And that's surely not what we want to portray as stan of such an intriguing and inspirational character like Abir.

p.s I did not intend to offend anyone, just wanting to clear the air little bit. Healthy discussions are always welcome. This forum should be a place where anyone should be able to express their views safely without having opposing views shoved back at them heavily.

Originally posted by: Onyourface

Its amazing to see that abir's as an character is so intriguing that people are still discussing him even after two months of the show being on hold That actually makes me a happy fan

Okay , coming down from my happy lane , let me try to explain what I think about abir as a family man ?

Aqua , not sure why you picked up those scenes where abir as a character was at its weakest and and highlighted only some of his lines from those scenes and then trying to set an image of him that he isn't a family man ??? Allow me to to explain what happened before and after those scenes in detail

First of all , I don't see anywhere being obsessed with his father ? That is his struggle to find a man whom he was emotionally attached to when he was his child, think about it , abir hasn't spend just 3 or hours but a good 6 to 7 years with his baba, who used to teach him all these good things about spirituality, humanity to the extent that he shared his desire to make a school for underprivileged children in champaner , there have been so many such moments that would have created such am impact on abir's life that he actually decided to build that school as a tribute to his baba, drew towards the spiritual aspect of life and started helping the society in his own ways, in a way he was following his baba's ideologies , yes baba was a sham and we can't really blame abir for not seeing through, even meenu an adult with a strong mind if still fell for baba's charming works that abir was just a child then ? Undoubtedly, abir was very much emotionally attached to his father and him leaving away without any answer created a big hole in his heart

The reason his curiosity went af peak because his fade memories were totally in contrast with the story that contradicted ( infact they told him a wrong story which I will explain in later part of my post l As a child , when he asked where is his baba , he got slapped? For the longest time he kept asking but the only answer he got was " tumhare baba Hume chod ke chale Gaye " Arey bhai aage toh bolo , as a child, abir couldn't understand many things, I agree but in meenu's words " abir is neend mein bhi hoshiyar " so why not give this hoshiyar man , a son who is her abhimaan a chance to know the truth ? Infact , abir himself took a stand against baba in the end when he gets to know the entire truth and even apologised to meenu , and he could have done that earlier also is meenu and family had chosen to be honest to him, clearly he wasn't obsessed with baba , because if he was , he would have chosen baba over his family and ignored the facts !! Coming to obsession , obsession could me someone drinking high and trying to jump from the terrace ? Obsession is someone not getting over the past and hurting people in present in the most nastiest ways possible? Someone trying to hate someone just because their ego hot hurt after facing a rejection? But even that is not obsession for me , because just like others have their share of past to contribute to their emotions at present , so does abir !!!

Now coming to your naani shrad part , since you have seen the episodes you must be aware that abir had a strong reason to question naanu that day because mins before he got a call from his baba for the first time saying " I am helpless , I need you , I need my sons " ....how do you expect abir to take this statement? Should he remain calm and ignore it ?? You must have seen how much that phone call impacted him , he asked naanu is he father even alive ? Now he comes the twisted part , I have seen that reply 4 times and I don't know why naanu twisted it for him

"Bohot saal pehle company mein fraud Hua tha , jispe sabse zyada bharosa kiya tha Maine usne mujhe dhoka diya tha , koslu bohot chota tha , meenu tujhe leke yahan aa gayi meri madad karne "

"Aur baba ne madad karne se inkaar kar diya , yeh maa ka version hai mujhe sach janna hai nannu " says abir

So what did you figure out here? Naanu is giving a wrong story here , he is telling fraud Hua hai but isn't naming that the fraudster is baba , baba had some problem with meenu helping naanu, what problem ....?

infact the way abir completed the sentence makes me believe that meenu never let him knew that baba did the fraud , infact she only told baba Hume chod ke chale Gaye, so now imagine when baba came back and meenu and naanu showed him the proof that baba was only the fraudster, would abir believe anyone easily ? Wouldn't abir think ki pehle kuchh aur bola abhi kuchh aur , proofs the toh dikhaye kyun nahi ? Doesn't a child have the right to know about his father ? What wrong did he do to his mother ? Why the memories are so contradicting? Why are people lying and indirectly trying to stop him? Does his questioning make him an anti family man ? Especially when he can sense a layer of lies and manipulation around ? Btw talking about naani's shrad, I didn't see any other family man and family woman present there , can I assume no one cared about naani's shrad expect for abir and koslu ? No I won't!

Coming to abir filing an FIR , it was about someone calling him , addressing himself as his baba, the number getting out of reach after that phone call and meenu going to ganpati mandir all this just increased his curiosity and suspicion on meenu, that was the words he used on meenu ke at yeh sun ke kuchh toh bataye, he isn't like meenu who would send parul to jail to fulfill her selfish motives and ignore abir's emotional struggles , didn't even care about the new girl whose life would also get destroyed ?

abir didn't even know that naanu bimar hai , abir was in mahs house when naanu fell I'll, infact naanu was standing healthy in the next scene with abir , asking meenu to tell abir where baba is ....abir gave a fair chance to both naanu and meenu to explain their side , he even said he trusts naanu , but when he saw naanu lied to him about baba's whereabouts, what he is supposed to say? Can't he even ask why did you lie ? Meenu told him the wrong address , even sent a person behind him , always tried to hide things and conveniently lie , left no option for him but to venture out to find his answers on his own ? Why push him to that extent ? Abir said maa sahi ho sakti hai aur baba galat , par jooth kyun bol rahe ho ? He was ready to listen the truth , why weren't people ready to tell him the truth ?

And after all this , if that man finally breaks down in front of his family, tells him that he feels lost because there is no one around to understand his feelings and thoughts , no one to address his answers , someone has called him up and asked for his help , he is constantly facing lies and manipulations around, no one is caring enough to sit down and explain him , doesn't that person have all the rights to burst out his frustrations in front of his family members? Does that make him a drama queen? Yeh kaha ka logic hai , dusro ke tears is their emotional pain , dil pe laga dard etc etc etc , abir ka emotional outburst uska drama queen ....wah ji wah ji wah * slow claps * also I didn't when naanu told abir that his health is getting affected because of abir's obsession

Yes abir was definitely wrong in judging in baba, but is that his fault? Wasn't he made to believe certain things by baba , was he given a timely closure by meenu ? Was he totally wrong in finding some answers about his past ? Does a family member mean that you have to blindly follow your elders without even having the right to ask questions? Abir did cross his lines, but does that reduce him to being selfish, really ? So us hisab se toh saare hi selfish ho Gaye, family man woman raha hi kon?

Coming to man child , if a person makes mistakes, he tries to introspect , take stands for the right, tries to understand everyone, has highest levels of empathy, apologises when he realises that he went wrong rather than stupidly blaming others , gives chances to others , tries to look at the positive side and wants everyone to freely let their opinions and is an active observer in the journey of life , has 0 ego

, if all this makes him a man child then I am happy to stan this man child all my life!! Btw everyone is a child here , everyone is living a life and life is always a learning process , till your last breath so I really don't understand the concept of man child, who isn't here ?

Now coming to your final question, is family man ???

A person who can read her sister's eyes and can sense that something is wrong, her words don't match her eyes, she doesn't want to proceed with the rishta but has no idea how to deal with with it , who herself says its only abir who can help her , if for her he decides to leave his trip and is ready to go back home , help her sister explain her side , If this isn't a family man than who is he ?

A person who believes that isn't right for nanko to spend his life struggling between his mom and his brother, he wants to see his brother in a happy zone, who was always there for his brother like a father is there for a child , who always tried to understand him and bring him out of his blues, if he isn't a family man than who is he?

A brother in law who tried to understand kuku more than her own husband when she was getting divorced, gave her a shoulder to cry , inspired her to stop wasting her time and be independent, even helped her set up business, find her first client ( abir's friend neha ) even at times when he himself was dealing with a break up , where his own family members didn't even care to ask why is he wearing shades at home ? If he isn't a family man than who is he?

A person who was put into the most nastiest catch 22 situation, let the love of his go , didn't even take that 1% chance and choose his brother because he knew kunal's truth would shatter not only kunal but his whole family, decided to pay attention to parul's plea more than mishti , decided not to be "selfish" and take one for the family, if he isn't a family man who is he ?

He , who has suffered so much because of his mom's plans , physically, mentally and emotionally but still decided to let bygones by bygones and gave one chance to his mom and apni shaadi pe leke aaya clearly knowing that meenu is still on mishti hate mode, but still he did it for his family's happiness, if he isn't a family man , than who is he?

He , who has advised mishti long back to live separately, because he knew there are lot of complications that the family and mishti have with each other , so for happiness and peace of mishti and family if he takes this step , if he isn't a family man than who is he ?

Ah the latest one , he even tried to understand kuhu at her weakest , tried to make her understand in the sweetest way possible, even went against mishti on this , so that things don't sour in the family and meenu doesn't get an upper hand, if he isn't a family man than who is he ?

He decided to get parul a rightly deserved apology from kuhu , gets worried about her stand in the family, if he isn't a family man , who is he ?

Abir has always been there for all the family members when they need , he had his own struggles too , but he had never given them priority over his family, he himself says that when someone gets hurt in his family , he is the one who also feels the pain and he doesn't only say, he has shown it from his actions, many times !!

Just because he isn't a part of his family business or he hasn't given anyone a right to choose his partner , that makes him an anti family man?a

This is the biggest reason , his family tries to hold him around, he is like salt in the recipe , jab dish mein hota hai toh kisi ko kadar nahi hoti , kabhi salt ke bina dish banake dekhna, that will be the only ingredient that you will miss , no matter how much other ingredients try to make up , that's the reason they all tried to change his decision of living separately, somewhere abir is everyone's emotional guiding light

He calls himself banjara , he doesn't know that he actually is an anchor in everyone's life, just try to abir rajvansh house without abir , m sure many would not be able to imagine

I am very shocked that abir's emotions are made fun of sometimes by calling him a hot headed rebel who has an habit of leaving conversations midway, only if you realized that he does when he realises that there is actually no one around to understand him , to give him a shoulder to cry, to answer him ,

All I can see is his questioning eyes " why does my own family deceit me everytime I try to trust them ? What have i done to get such a treatment from my own ? "

Aqua , I am quite shocked with your take, you are someone who in interested to do ocean depth analysis on meenu kunal and kuhu , has such a take on abir at face value ? Who no ocean depth analysis for abir ? Why is he limited to hot headed banjara who is a rebel for no reason ?

Also , kudos to shaheer for taking up abir , he isn't just the best ML on ITV but I would say the best human being on ITV ( I need not elaborate this , samajh ne vale samajh Gaye )

and he is immensely loved by the audience who truly understand his character , certainly not the best but abir is one of the best characters that shaheer has played, it's so good to see the fun side , the nautanki side , the emotional side, the dances,

a full on paisa vasool character , if makers would have given more chances to abir to express his emotions in a detailed form , that would have been a cherry on the cake, I became a shaheer fan after this show only , abir will always remain special to me

PS: For the longest of time I kept myself away from such posts, but today I had to say, sorry If i offended anyone and was way too harsh for my replies .... but today I had to let it out, I don't mind the empathy and understanding of other characters , even I do that, but why no attempt to understand mishbir in the same way? Abir and mishti have their own set of flaws, and I accept them criticize them openly too when they go wrong but sometimes I believe that there is some misunderstanding around his character so I felt the need to speak up

Bang on post Uru👏👏👏

I You love..abir ki uru once again you proved Your are sach mein abir ki uru👍🏼

Yaar you have made me cry..while reading abir struggle i was literally crying..felt so sad for him😭

I really dont understand onething for all other characters they have their own set of rules(sometimes i saw thier discussion what not shown in the show they discuss abt that and empathise with that characters) but for abir and mishti they dont even see what was shown in the show..they always blame abir and mishti

And for shaheer choosing this role..he knows what he does and he is very happy abt this show..and abir character was loved by large people on/off sns❤️

Originally posted by: aquaHP

As much as I have loved Shaheer's body of work, it's becoming hard for me to understand what attracted him to this character or rather why he is still a part of this show, as I re-watch certain episodes from the show.

For context, I was watching the episodes from the fight between Abir and Kunal in the Ganesh Chaturthi pandal. (Side note: What phenomenal piece of acting by Shaheer and Ritvik!!! Absolutely amazing!). Now, I've reached the episode where Nanu falls ill and Abir threatens Meenakshi that if she didn't tell him the whereabouts of his dad, he would lodge an FIR.

Coming to the part that bothers me, Abir is so selfish!!!!! When your whole family is telling you and I mean, even Jugnu, you need to stop and listen to them. They've told you so many times that the man is not right for anyone. Chalo leave pehle ki baat. Naanu has said it 3 times in two episodes. He has fallen ill because of his obsession and still, he is saying that this house needs Baba. Oh come on!! Bolne se pehle socho to zara!

After watching this set of episodes, I don't even understand why people say that he is the one pulling the whole family together. He is the reason why the whole family needs to be pulled together. If he was even a bit responsible and a bit trusting of his family, which he so isn't. As he said so himself to Nanu, "Iss family me main aapko chhod kar kisi aur pe trust nahi karta hoon aur aapne bhi mujhse jhoot bola" and then, he decides to leave the family to search for the man who left years ago just because he remembers one memory that doesn't sit right with the story he has been told??

Also, what is with his attitude whenever someone tells him the truth? When he asks Nanu about his dad (in the middle of his Naani's shraad pooja, mind you!), and Nanu tells him the mellowed down version of the truth for his own sake, he says that he wants to know the "truth" and not the story he has been told since he was a kid and what a piece of work his father. Well, the fact of the matter is he only wanted to hear a story where his dad comes out as a Bappa worshipping philanthropic hero.

Naanu was the reason my faith got restored in the episode when he said, "Sach koi bachpan me suni kahaani nahi hai ki pasand nahi aayi to badal di jaaye. Jo sach hai, wo sach hi rahega."

But dude still doesn't care!! Ek kaan se suna aur doosre se nikaal diya! He is like "All of you people might have raised me, taken care of me all these years and even though, everyone is telling me that I should not do this, I will not listen to you but rather trust my 20year old memory in which I just see my dad leaving my hand. I may not remember his name, his face, or any discerning detail about this person but surely, my judgement is better than 4 adults telling me their actual experience of this man." Oh god! He is such a man-child!!! I can't believe I didn't see this when the episode aired!

Pihu, this is indeed a very interesting approach you've taken to Abir's character.

I can see where you're coming from, and why some scenes may appear like/make Abir seem like he is frivolous, irresponsible etc. But with all the other parts of the story, I'm sure there are countless moments when Abir has proven himself to be a worthy family man. Surely there must be a real damn good reason why the entire RV family, especially Meenu and Naanu shiver at the idea of Abir leaving the house and family.

Although, to be frank I wasn't expecting your view to be this superficial, I know you're better than this girl

A few of the other girls have already explained in much more detail, very beautifully (vaishu and uru), on all the moments when Abir may have superficially appeared to be 'childish' or 'stubborn' but he has full valid reasons to be so.

The reason why Abir as a character is loved, respected and admired so much is the fact that he is so PERFECTLY IMPERFECT (the order of those words matter) he is human; the fact that he does have these flaws where he has been running away from problems whenever he struggles to deal with them (Mishti herself has caught him out on this on their first date) and he knows/accepts he is not perfect, he is not strong, he is not always right. Abir is an iconic lead that stands up against his family when needed - for what he believes is right, He genuinely apologises multiple times when he realises his mistake (sometimes even apologises when it isn't his fault) BUT doesn't forget his roots, principles and basic tradition of respecting his elders, whilst asking the rightful questions as an ever-learning being.

xx

Originally posted by: Onyourface

🤣🤣 I will hit you with mishti's danda okay 🤣

You can see what I have written 😆 upar dekh le

As vaishu said you are sach mein abir ki uru ...you explained his character ,his love for his family, his pain each and every emotion very beautifully 😳

Just want to add one thing on what attracted shaheer to this character, may be just like us fans who have our own reasons to love this show, even shaheer might have had his reasons to love this show hence signed for the character Abir Rajvansh😃

the thing that drew me to this show is the multitude of contrasting characters, unique in their own way , having a charm of their own style..& the fact I started connecting with Mishbir is that they are not perfect...they r just not perfect..because none of us are..& that's what makes them close to us..they are not any prince or princess from a fairy tale , they r just normal people like we are..just not perfect..

they r not the always happy go lucky ppl or not those who come up with this world is not the happier place to be..they r those people who understand that though this world is unforgiving , we can find happiness if at all we try for it earnestly..an optimistic yet not over the board portrayal of character trait..a best take away for me atleast..

for there were/are characters in ITV who used to take up every life's fight with a smile on their face & there were/are characters who go rash about their life challenges ...both of which is practically impossible for any of us...

Mishbir when faced with challenges beyond their capabilities , they fall weak , tear up & sometimes vent out their frustration in private (just like Abir's outburst in the car after Meenu wants him to leave Mishti or Mishti breaking down & questioning her kannaji after knowing their breakup truth)...but they face those challenges after that head on ...& they have won them too..

another important highlight of their characters is -- they own up to their mistakes & work to correct them in the best possible way..not once was their mistakes taken for granted..they had to endure brutal punishments for every small mistake of them but still they do so because they are guilty of commiting them even though they did them unknowingly & they make every possible try to make full amends..(instances being many..& explaining each will drain my energy & the thread's space)

coming to the flaws as the character Abir possesses ...true he is flawed...but the word is PERFECTLY... Abir as a character is so beautifully flawed & i would love to thank the writers for coming up with one.. & bravo to Shaheer to have taken such a thought provoking character 👏 & i can clearly understand now why that man is so enthusiastic towards the show like come on Abir has made the audience to come up with a completely different take on an onscreen character that has not been seen for almost 2 months now and that itself describes how beautiful the character is....like come on -- it makes u rethink, requestion urself , makes u try hard to find flaws in an already not so perfect but yet perfectly flawed character....

every other questions raised were in detail met by almost all posts in this thread...a big applause to all the people for their lovely posts ...special mention Uru's crystal clear explanation of a family man👏

coming to the question of not understanding the people or to be exact not valuing the emotions of the people who raised you these many years ...

questioning a person does not mean disrespecting him/her..it refelcts we value their thoughts but want to understand it in a better possible way.. that too in a family , children have the right of questioning their parents & elders & that is how they learn things & that is how they grow up..there is an importance in teaching a small child moral values.. because only then he/she adopts them as their character traits when they become adults..similarly unaddressing a child's questions too have a tremendous effect on them --- the exact effect we see in Abir finding it so hard to trust his mother..

why for once Meenu didnt feel the need to answer her sayana beta's questions...array bachpan mei samjega nahi..par bada hone pe toh samaj jaayega na...beshaq he would have cross-checked the truth they say ...but at the end he would have believed them & stood by them...we have Abir's words for the same ---- jiss dhin aap mujhse sajh bholenge uss dhin mei aap par bharosa karoonga...& the man stood by his words -- giving it back to his not-so-deserving baba in his signature style..

and the justification he cant handle the truth --- again Abir's words for the same ...tujhe kya patha ki mein kya kya handle kar letha hoon 😎....oh..come on people..give him a chance to face it & then u will know it how effortlessly he does it ...

and i clearly dont get the point in saying "Abir doesnt deserve an answer about his father's wherabouts"...i mean why ...woh usska baap hai..haq bantha hai Abir ko, usske baap ke baare mei jaan ne ka..every child does..so does he..

Meenu as a mother never stopped Abir from voicing his thoughts..she always asked him to argue with her , fight her..(though it is yet another thing that she chooses to evade his questions by emotional points rather than anwering them directly)....jab Meenu doesnt have a problem with her son questioning her , patha nahi baaki sab ko problem kyun ho rahi hai...

again not caring for a sick oldman's health -- Uru had explained the sequence of events so well ...who cared to inform him?...array ye log Abir se sirf usske baba ka hi nahi..frankly koi bhi sach nahi share kartheh yaaron 🤔...& then y will he not trust a man who is his father , whom he had a great image of & because of whom he was inspired to be a better person..

and finally the flaws not being addressed for every character in the show..relax yaaron..this is an ITV show..matlab long running drama...& we have a really great dedicated team of people behind the screen & infront of it...so i trust them & hope they will come up with even more beautiful tracks post this lockdown..

ps -- my post is my take on the show..honestly not intended to hurt anybody else's

https://twitter.com/OrmaxMedia/status/1250808799792791552?s=20

This tweet is enough to prove that out of all the 'layered characters' of yrhpk, Abir is loved the most by the entire country

Humare banjaare se sab pyaar karte Kyunki #AbirHeeraHai

Originally posted by: MishBirStruck

Abir is not a Family Guy, he's a banjara ye Hume epi 1 se pata hai

He never goes for what will happen to family and Its reputation, he goes for right thing

Ketki ke liye khada hua because she doesn't want to get married not thinking about family reputation

And the way he answers meenu benause he knows meenu always uses baba's going away thing to her advantage, To why can't he blame her, disrespecting elders is not cool but disrespecting wrong is very cool

Kunal ko shaadi mein laana chaha because kuhu is waiting for kunal a girl who's in love with his nanko not because family ka kya hoga

Mishti ke saath dusre ghar mein rehna chaha , not just because his baba said that, but he also knew mishti will not be happy

Mishti ke saath break up isliye nahi kiya Kyuki family ka kya hoga agar sach bahar aa gaya but Isliye kiya Kyuki his nanko will not be able to handle it

During baba's track

From childhood he was informed that his baba left his mom, no reason nothing, the Man who put such beautiful thoughts in his mind, who preached the idealistic things, who loved him when left without a reason isn't it's meenakshi's responsibility to be honest with him, chalo bachpan mein nahi Kar sakti, why she waited till baba came, usse pehle tak what was the reason, she has her sources Kar deti proof, abir pehle nahi maanta but investigate zarur karta and sach tak pahuch hi jaata. Then why not (don't blame writing let's keep it into the story, story ka ye part samajh nahi aaya iska matlab Ye nahi ki CVs ki galti it means Kuch to hai which is still hidden ), the way baba said ki Dusra adhyay baaki hai Meri kahaani ka matlab aur pages khulne baaki hai that could make meenu parul mehul every character seem different

Abir asking Nanu and telling him that he expected truth, he trusted on shradh, yes he's a man child who just got his baba with with other family members are not happy at all. I agree he behaved little immaturely, he became stubborn so what, he has that right considering his mental state.

Why can't you all just say him truth, just tell him and then trust him with that. They actually thought of giving him news articles as proof, yeah right

Why he trusted baba more than his whole family, he finally found his home in mishti, his mom and nanko against it, insulting his home all the time and then a man comes who says he understands his love for mishti, he understands he wants a family, though Sab dhong tha but he said all this and Abir being MAN CHILD will of course want that. He wanted a moment of piece with his family, he wanted his nanko to be there, his naanu to be there but nothing happened like that.

Atleast vo apne decisions dusro pe thopta to nahi hai, 3-4 baar samjhaya kunal ko why he wanted mishti in his life, he loves him too but he can't chose, he made it clear to meenu that why he loves her sabko bata diya that he'll not stake his relation with mishti because of them, nahi Maane he decided to shift. At least MERE pariwaar ke liye, MAIN Ye hone nahi dunga, MAIN Ye nahi chahta ye Sab to nahi bola, sabko apni soch ke saath rehne deta hai, chahta hai ki vo uske hisaab se bhi soche, Samjhe but uske liye games nahi khelta

And what's with that leads ko mahaan dikhane ke liye character ko ruin Kar rahe, characters acche Kab the, wasn't nannu was addicted obsessed person from his childhood, wasn't it was obvious ki break up mein third entry Hui hai to to wo love triangle ke liye Hui hai, fir bhi jis hisaab ki treatment other characters ko milti hai grand entry grand exit with leads saying sorry to them and Ehsaan maan na unka ki Wo unki life mein aaye or hain, all the deeds brushed under the carpet, itni mahaanta Dikha ke jaate Sab and then too because leads ko mahaan banana hai . Leads are mahaan from starting, nahi hote to baaki character's ki story develop nahi hoti.

Awesome post yaar Vaishu👍🏼🤗

Straight to the point and bang on!👏👏

@Bold: THIS is exactly the primary mistake that Meenu and Naanu continued to repeatedly commit. Even after Abir openly expressed his feelings, he admitted that he could be wrong and Meenu could be right, his Baba could be wrong and his faith on him - but even still both his mother and grandfather chose to try and coax him like a child diverted by sweets/candy

If only Meenu had just taken that genuine time and effort to sit down with Abir properly and explain to him of the details, and why she he had been hiding these truths, I'm sure Abir would have eventually (if not very soon) come around and accepted her words. ALL abir asked for was the opportunity to make his OWN informed decision about Baba not based on 'stories' he's been told for the last 20odd years.

Originally posted by: Kendrix

the thing that drew me to this show is the multitude of contrasting characters, unique in their own way , having a charm of their own style..& the fact I started connecting with Mishbir is that they are not perfect...they r just not perfect..because none of us are..& that's what makes them close to us..they are not any prince or princess from a fairy tale , they r just normal people like we are..just not perfect..

they r not the always happy go lucky ppl or not those who come up with this world is not the happier place to be..they r those people who understand that though this world is unforgiving , we can find happiness if at all we try for it earnestly..an optimistic yet not over the board portrayal of character trait..a best take away for me atleast..

for there were/are characters in ITV who used to take up every life's fight with a smile on their face & there were/are characters who go rash about their life challenges ...both of which is practically impossible for any of us...

Mishbir when faced with challenges beyond their capabilities , they fall weak , tear up & sometimes vent out their frustration in private (just like Abir's outburst in the car after Meenu wants him to leave Mishti or Mishti breaking down & questioning her kannaji after knowing their breakup truth)...but they face those challenges after that head on ...& they have won them too..

another important highlight of their characters is -- they own up to their mistakes & work to correct them in the best possible way..not once was their mistakes taken for granted..they had to endure brutal punishments for every small mistake of them but still they do so because they are guilty of commiting them even though they did them unknowingly & they make every possible try to make full amends..(instances being many..& explaining each will drain my energy & the thread's space)

coming to the flaws as the character Abir possesses ...true he is flawed...but the word is PERFECTLY... Abir as a character is so beautifully flawed & i would love to thank the writers for coming up with one.. & bravo to Shaheer to have taken such a thought provoking character 👏 & i can clearly understand now why that man is so enthusiastic towards the show like come on Abir has made the audience to come up with a completely different take on an onscreen character that has not been seen for almost 2 months now and that itself describes how beautiful the character is....like come on -- it makes u rethink, requestion urself , makes u try hard to find flaws in an already not so perfect but yet perfectly flawed character....

every other questions raised were in detail met by almost all posts in this thread...a big applause to all the people for their lovely posts ...special mention Uru's crystal clear explanation of a family man👏

coming to the question of not understanding the people or to be exact not valuing the emotions of the people who raised you these many years ...

questioning a person does not mean disrespecting him/her..it refelcts we value their thoughts but want to understand it in a better possible way.. that too in a family , children have the right of questioning their parents & elders & that is how they learn things & that is how they grow up..there is an importance in teaching a small child moral values.. because only then he/she adopts them as their character traits when they become adults..similarly unaddressing a child's questions too have a tremendous effect on them --- the exact effect we see in Abir finding it so hard to trust his mother..

why for once Meenu didnt feel the need to answer her sayana beta's questions...array bachpan mei samjega nahi..par bada hone pe toh samaj jaayega na...beshaq he would have cross-checked the truth they say ...but at the end he would have believed them & stood by them...we have Abir's words for the same ---- jiss dhin aap mujhse sajh bholenge uss dhin mei aap par bharosa karoonga...& the man stood by his words -- giving it back to his not-so-deserving baba in his signature style..

and the justification he cant handle the truth 😆 --- again Abir's words for the same ...tujhe kya patha ki mein kya kya handle kar letha hoon 😎....oh..come on people..give him a chance to face it & then u will know it how effortlessly he does it ...

and i clearly dont get the point in saying "Abir doesnt deserve an answer about his father's wherabouts"...i mean why ...woh usska baap hai..haq bantha hai Abir ko, usske baap ke baare mei jaan ne ka..every child does..so does he..

Meenu as a mother never stopped Abir from voicing his thoughts..she always asked him to argue with her , fight her..(though it is yet another thing that she chooses to evade his questions by emotional points rather than anwering them directly)....jab Meenu doesnt have a problem with her son questioning her , patha nahi baaki sab ko problem kyun ho rahi hai...

again not caring for a sick oldman's health -- Uru had explained the sequence of events so well ...who cared to inform him?...array ye log Abir se sirf usske baba ka hi nahi..frankly koi bhi sach nahi share kartheh yaaron 🤔...& then y will he not trust a man who is his father , whom he had a great image of & because of whom he was inspired to be a better person..

and finally the flaws not being addressed for every character in the show..relax yaaron..this is an ITV show..matlab long running drama...& we have a really great dedicated team of people behind the screen & infront of it...so i trust them & hope they will come up with even more beautiful tracks post this lockdown..

ps -- my post is my take on the show..honestly not intended to hurt anybody else's

so true.. also I wanted to add a few more observation about the show.

In YEHPK verse, there are 4 types of people

1- meenu types who want every one to follow her and be her puppets. She will never accept her flaws and mistakes

2- abir and mishti - loves the family to a fault. They are also flawed coz they want to make life easy for their loved ones who don’t appreciate them. But when they err, they accept, apologize and learn from the mistakes. They are the doers.. so they gave lot of flak

3- kuhu types who want to take decisions but they don’t want any responsibility of those same decisions. They try to blame others for all the problems in their life instead of introspection and putting the blame exactly where it lies. They are weaklings who cannot stand tall and face the music. The shallow ones

4- kunal and other family- followers, who does things as they are told without thinking much.. they are happy to be told and they have no problem in being the puppets. The herd

Originally posted by: Kendrix

the thing that drew me to this show is the multitude of contrasting characters, unique in their own way , having a charm of their own style..& the fact I started connecting with Mishbir is that they are not perfect...they r just not perfect..because none of us are..& that's what makes them close to us..they are not any prince or princess from a fairy tale , they r just normal people like we are..just not perfect..

they r not the always happy go lucky ppl or not those who come up with this world is not the happier place to be..they r those people who understand that though this world is unforgiving , we can find happiness if at all we try for it earnestly..an optimistic yet not over the board portrayal of character trait..a best take away for me atleast..

for there were/are characters in ITV who used to take up every life's fight with a smile on their face & there were/are characters who go rash about their life challenges ...both of which is practically impossible for any of us...

Mishbir when faced with challenges beyond their capabilities , they fall weak , tear up & sometimes vent out their frustration in private (just like Abir's outburst in the car after Meenu wants him to leave Mishti or Mishti breaking down & questioning her kannaji after knowing their breakup truth)...but they face those challenges after that head on ...& they have won them too..

another important highlight of their characters is -- they own up to their mistakes & work to correct them in the best possible way..not once was their mistakes taken for granted..they had to endure brutal punishments for every small mistake of them but still they do so because they are guilty of commiting them even though they did them unknowingly & they make every possible try to make full amends..(instances being many..& explaining each will drain my energy & the thread's space)

coming to the flaws as the character Abir possesses ...true he is flawed...but the word is PERFECTLY... Abir as a character is so beautifully flawed & i would love to thank the writers for coming up with one.. & bravo to Shaheer to have taken such a thought provoking character 👏 & i can clearly understand now why that man is so enthusiastic towards the show like come on Abir has made the audience to come up with a completely different take on an onscreen character that has not been seen for almost 2 months now and that itself describes how beautiful the character is....like come on -- it makes u rethink, requestion urself , makes u try hard to find flaws in an already not so perfect but yet perfectly flawed character....

every other questions raised were in detail met by almost all posts in this thread...a big applause to all the people for their lovely posts ...special mention Uru's crystal clear explanation of a family man👏

coming to the question of not understanding the people or to be exact not valuing the emotions of the people who raised you these many years ...

questioning a person does not mean disrespecting him/her..it refelcts we value their thoughts but want to understand it in a better possible way.. that too in a family , children have the right of questioning their parents & elders & that is how they learn things & that is how they grow up..there is an importance in teaching a small child moral values.. because only then he/she adopts them as their character traits when they become adults..similarly unaddressing a child's questions too have a tremendous effect on them --- the exact effect we see in Abir finding it so hard to trust his mother..

why for once Meenu didnt feel the need to answer her sayana beta's questions...array bachpan mei samjega nahi..par bada hone pe toh samaj jaayega na...beshaq he would have cross-checked the truth they say ...but at the end he would have believed them & stood by them...we have Abir's words for the same ---- jiss dhin aap mujhse sajh bholenge uss dhin mei aap par bharosa karoonga...& the man stood by his words -- giving it back to his not-so-deserving baba in his signature style..

and the justification he cant handle the truth 😆 --- again Abir's words for the same ...tujhe kya patha ki mein kya kya handle kar letha hoon 😎....oh..come on people..give him a chance to face it & then u will know it how effortlessly he does it ...

and i clearly dont get the point in saying "Abir doesnt deserve an answer about his father's wherabouts"...i mean why ...woh usska baap hai..haq bantha hai Abir ko, usske baap ke baare mei jaan ne ka..every child does..so does he..

Meenu as a mother never stopped Abir from voicing his thoughts..she always asked him to argue with her , fight her..(though it is yet another thing that she chooses to evade his questions by emotional points rather than anwering them directly)....jab Meenu doesnt have a problem with her son questioning her , patha nahi baaki sab ko problem kyun ho rahi hai...

again not caring for a sick oldman's health -- Uru had explained the sequence of events so well ...who cared to inform him?...array ye log Abir se sirf usske baba ka hi nahi..frankly koi bhi sach nahi share kartheh yaaron 🤔...& then y will he not trust a man who is his father , whom he had a great image of & because of whom he was inspired to be a better person..

and finally the flaws not being addressed for every character in the show..relax yaaron..this is an ITV show..matlab long running drama...& we have a really great dedicated team of people behind the screen & infront of it...so i trust them & hope they will come up with even more beautiful tracks post this lockdown..

ps -- my post is my take on the show..honestly not intended to hurt anybody else's

its awesome... love u dear...

Originally posted by: Onyourface

Its amazing to see that abir's as an character is so intriguing that people are still discussing him even after two months of the show being on hold That actually makes me a happy fan

Okay , coming down from my happy lane , let me try to explain what I think about abir as a family man ?

Aqua , not sure why you picked up those scenes where abir as a character was at its weakest and and highlighted only some of his lines from those scenes and then trying to set an image of him that he isn't a family man ??? Allow me to to explain what happened before and after those scenes in detail

First of all , I don't see anywhere being obsessed with his father ? That is his struggle to find a man whom he was emotionally attached to when he was his child, think about it , abir hasn't spend just 3 or hours but a good 6 to 7 years with his baba, who used to teach him all these good things about spirituality, humanity to the extent that he shared his desire to make a school for underprivileged children in champaner , there have been so many such moments that would have created such am impact on abir's life that he actually decided to build that school as a tribute to his baba, drew towards the spiritual aspect of life and started helping the society in his own ways, in a way he was following his baba's ideologies , yes baba was a sham and we can't really blame abir for not seeing through, even meenu an adult with a strong mind if still fell for baba's charming works that abir was just a child then ? Undoubtedly, abir was very much emotionally attached to his father and him leaving away without any answer created a big hole in his heart

The reason his curiosity went af peak because his fade memories were totally in contrast with the story that contradicted ( infact they told him a wrong story which I will explain in later part of my post l As a child , when he asked where is his baba , he got slapped? For the longest time he kept asking but the only answer he got was " tumhare baba Hume chod ke chale Gaye " Arey bhai aage toh bolo , as a child, abir couldn't understand many things, I agree but in meenu's words " abir is neend mein bhi hoshiyar " so why not give this hoshiyar man , a son who is her abhimaan a chance to know the truth ? Infact , abir himself took a stand against baba in the end when he gets to know the entire truth and even apologised to meenu , and he could have done that earlier also is meenu and family had chosen to be honest to him, clearly he wasn't obsessed with baba , because if he was , he would have chosen baba over his family and ignored the facts !! Coming to obsession , obsession could me someone drinking high and trying to jump from the terrace ? Obsession is someone not getting over the past and hurting people in present in the most nastiest ways possible? Someone trying to hate someone just because their ego hot hurt after facing a rejection? But even that is not obsession for me , because just like others have their share of past to contribute to their emotions at present , so does abir !!!

Now coming to your naani shrad part , since you have seen the episodes you must be aware that abir had a strong reason to question naanu that day because mins before he got a call from his baba for the first time saying " I am helpless , I need you , I need my sons " ....how do you expect abir to take this statement? Should he remain calm and ignore it ?? You must have seen how much that phone call impacted him , he asked naanu is he father even alive ? Now he comes the twisted part , I have seen that reply 4 times and I don't know why naanu twisted it for him

"Bohot saal pehle company mein fraud Hua tha , jispe sabse zyada bharosa kiya tha Maine usne mujhe dhoka diya tha , koslu bohot chota tha , meenu tujhe leke yahan aa gayi meri madad karne "

"Aur baba ne madad karne se inkaar kar diya , yeh maa ka version hai mujhe sach janna hai nannu " says abir

So what did you figure out here? Naanu is giving a wrong story here , he is telling fraud Hua hai but isn't naming that the fraudster is baba , baba had some problem with meenu helping naanu, what problem ....?

infact the way abir completed the sentence makes me believe that meenu never let him knew that baba did the fraud , infact she only told baba Hume chod ke chale Gaye, so now imagine when baba came back and meenu and naanu showed him the proof that baba was only the fraudster, would abir believe anyone easily ? Wouldn't abir think ki pehle kuchh aur bola abhi kuchh aur , proofs the toh dikhaye kyun nahi ? Doesn't a child have the right to know about his father ? What wrong did he do to his mother ? Why the memories are so contradicting? Why are people lying and indirectly trying to stop him? Does his questioning make him an anti family man ? Especially when he can sense a layer of lies and manipulation around ? Btw talking about naani's shrad, I didn't see any other family man and family woman present there , can I assume no one cared about naani's shrad expect for abir and koslu ? No I won't!

Coming to abir filing an FIR , it was about someone calling him , addressing himself as his baba, the number getting out of reach after that phone call and meenu going to ganpati mandir all this just increased his curiosity and suspicion on meenu, that was the words he used on meenu ke at yeh sun ke kuchh toh bataye, he isn't like meenu who would send parul to jail to fulfill her selfish motives and ignore abir's emotional struggles , didn't even care about the new girl whose life would also get destroyed ?

abir didn't even know that naanu bimar hai , abir was in mahs house when naanu fell I'll, infact naanu was standing healthy in the next scene with abir , asking meenu to tell abir where baba is ....abir gave a fair chance to both naanu and meenu to explain their side , he even said he trusts naanu , but when he saw naanu lied to him about baba's whereabouts, what he is supposed to say? Can't he even ask why did you lie ? Meenu told him the wrong address , even sent a person behind him , always tried to hide things and conveniently lie , left no option for him but to venture out to find his answers on his own ? Why push him to that extent ? Abir said maa sahi ho sakti hai aur baba galat , par jooth kyun bol rahe ho ? He was ready to listen the truth , why weren't people ready to tell him the truth ?

And after all this , if that man finally breaks down in front of his family, tells him that he feels lost because there is no one around to understand his feelings and thoughts , no one to address his answers , someone has called him up and asked for his help , he is constantly facing lies and manipulations around, no one is caring enough to sit down and explain him , doesn't that person have all the rights to burst out his frustrations in front of his family members? Does that make him a drama queen? Yeh kaha ka logic hai , dusro ke tears is their emotional pain , dil pe laga dard etc etc etc , abir ka emotional outburst uska drama queen ....wah ji wah ji wah * slow claps * also I didn't when naanu told abir that his health is getting affected because of abir's obsession

Yes abir was definitely wrong in judging in baba, but is that his fault? Wasn't he made to believe certain things by baba , was he given a timely closure by meenu ? Was he totally wrong in finding some answers about his past ? Does a family member mean that you have to blindly follow your elders without even having the right to ask questions? Abir did cross his lines, but does that reduce him to being selfish, really ? So us hisab se toh saare hi selfish ho Gaye, family man woman raha hi kon?

Coming to man child , if a person makes mistakes, he tries to introspect , take stands for the right, tries to understand everyone, has highest levels of empathy, apologises when he realises that he went wrong rather than stupidly blaming others , gives chances to others , tries to look at the positive side and wants everyone to freely let their opinions and is an active observer in the journey of life , has 0 ego

, if all this makes him a man child then I am happy to stan this man child all my life!! Btw everyone is a child here , everyone is living a life and life is always a learning process , till your last breath so I really don't understand the concept of man child, who isn't here ?

Now coming to your final question, is family man ???

A person who can read her sister's eyes and can sense that something is wrong, her words don't match her eyes, she doesn't want to proceed with the rishta but has no idea how to deal with with it , who herself says its only abir who can help her , if for her he decides to leave his trip and is ready to go back home , help her sister explain her side , If this isn't a family man than who is he ?

A person who believes that isn't right for nanko to spend his life struggling between his mom and his brother, he wants to see his brother in a happy zone, who was always there for his brother like a father is there for a child , who always tried to understand him and bring him out of his blues, if he isn't a family man than who is he?

A brother in law who tried to understand kuku more than her own husband when she was getting divorced, gave her a shoulder to cry , inspired her to stop wasting her time and be independent, even helped her set up business, find her first client ( abir's friend neha ) even at times when he himself was dealing with a break up , where his own family members didn't even care to ask why is he wearing shades at home ? If he isn't a family man than who is he?

A person who was put into the most nastiest catch 22 situation, let the love of his go , didn't even take that 1% chance and choose his brother because he knew kunal's truth would shatter not only kunal but his whole family, decided to pay attention to parul's plea more than mishti , decided not to be "selfish" and take one for the family, if he isn't a family man who is he ?

He , who has suffered so much because of his mom's plans , physically, mentally and emotionally but still decided to let bygones by bygones and gave one chance to his mom and apni shaadi pe leke aaya clearly knowing that meenu is still on mishti hate mode, but still he did it for his family's happiness, if he isn't a family man , than who is he?

He , who has advised mishti long back to live separately, because he knew there are lot of complications that the family and mishti have with each other , so for happiness and peace of mishti and family if he takes this step , if he isn't a family man than who is he ?

Ah the latest one , he even tried to understand kuhu at her weakest , tried to make her understand in the sweetest way possible, even went against mishti on this , so that things don't sour in the family and meenu doesn't get an upper hand, if he isn't a family man than who is he ?

He decided to get parul a rightly deserved apology from kuhu , gets worried about her stand in the family, if he isn't a family man , who is he ?

Abir has always been there for all the family members when they need , he had his own struggles too , but he had never given them priority over his family, he himself says that when someone gets hurt in his family , he is the one who also feels the pain and he doesn't only say, he has shown it from his actions, many times !!

Just because he isn't a part of his family business or he hasn't given anyone a right to choose his partner , that makes him an anti family man?a

This is the biggest reason , his family tries to hold him around, he is like salt in the recipe , jab dish mein hota hai toh kisi ko kadar nahi hoti , kabhi salt ke bina dish banake dekhna, that will be the only ingredient that you will miss , no matter how much other ingredients try to make up , that's the reason they all tried to change his decision of living separately, somewhere abir is everyone's emotional guiding light

He calls himself banjara , he doesn't know that he actually is an anchor in everyone's life, just try to abir rajvansh house without abir , m sure many would not be able to imagine

I am very shocked that abir's emotions are made fun of sometimes by calling him a hot headed rebel who has an habit of leaving conversations midway, only if you realized that he does when he realises that there is actually no one around to understand him , to give him a shoulder to cry, to answer him ,

All I can see is his questioning eyes " why does my own family deceit me everytime I try to trust them ? What have i done to get such a treatment from my own ? "

Aqua , I am quite shocked with your take, you are someone who in interested to do ocean depth analysis on meenu kunal and kuhu , has such a take on abir at face value ? Who no ocean depth analysis for abir ? Why is he limited to hot headed banjara who is a rebel for no reason ?

Also , kudos to shaheer for taking up abir , he isn't just the best ML on ITV but I would say the best human being on ITV ( I need not elaborate this , samajh ne vale samajh Gaye )

and he is immensely loved by the audience who truly understand his character , certainly not the best but abir is one of the best characters that shaheer has played, it's so good to see the fun side , the nautanki side , the emotional side, the dances,

a full on paisa vasool character , if makers would have given more chances to abir to express his emotions in a detailed form , that would have been a cherry on the cake, I became a shaheer fan after this show only , abir will always remain special to me

PS: For the longest of time I kept myself away from such posts, but today I had to say, sorry If i offended anyone and was way too harsh for my replies .... but today I had to let it out, I don't mind the empathy and understanding of other characters , even I do that, but why no attempt to understand mishbir in the same way? Abir and mishti have their own set of flaws, and I accept them criticize them openly too when they go wrong but sometimes I believe that there is some misunderstanding around his character so I felt the need to speak up

GURUJI!!!!👏🥳

once again a KHIDKI TOD/POSTER PHOD ne wale post👏

I stan THIS! I STAN not only ABIR RAJVANSH, but I whole-heartedly stan ABIR KI URU!!❤️🤗

You know exactly how to put-forth your views and express them so articulately👍🏼 This had the best balance of being straightforward, direct but also equally composed. The build up with all the perfect examples you've chosen to write for Abir, created an amazing flow to this post (actually, post is an insult). This was an essay! worth reading repeatedly🤗👍🏼

I honestly have nothing more to add, because when we have Abir ki Uru, then there is no need for extra back-up - she can handle anything that comes her way. When it comes to Abir, she is first there as his supporter, shield and protector🤗

Like Mishti says' "aur jab baat Abir ki ho, tho main bolungi!"😎👏

@Boldblack: THIS sums up exactly what Abir rajvansh stands for. He truly is the family man (modern, yet without losing his traditional sanskars)🤗❤️

@boldblue: Just like Abir....Uru asking bang on absolute correct questions!!👏👏

We are #foreverLearningintheSchoolofLife

xx