Re: 2 shades of Babita',s, Marriage - Page 2

Originally posted by: divyadaya13

Only mistake of babita is she is a sweet gullible woman who did not object when her parents got her married at a very young age even though she wanted to study. She obeyed whatever her parents taught her about marriage. She was still a child when she got married. Woman even now are taught to accept whatever husbands and inlaws tell them to do. So she was obeying her wifely dharma. She is 90's generation when most of the time kids did what was expected by their parents. She felt she was making her husband happy by looking after his parents and one day he will definitely call her to him one day or will himself come back. She treated his parents like her own, infact gave them more than what they expected. Gave away precious seventeen years of her young life (This is what is always expected from indian females even now in this generation) with a hope that one day her husband will give her what she expects of him. On the other side mini grew up devoid of her dads love. Dont you think how she might have felt when she saw other kids getting pampered by their dad. Always people talk about ethics and those ethics are decided by those who themselves have not experienced what people like babita and mini have experienced. Insipite of babita being a good daughter, wife and daughter in law was abandoned by each and every one. Yes babita commited a biggest mistake of loving, trusting and respecting her loved ones. Hereafter woman should love only themselves because one day she will be blamed for loving everyone else but herself. Yes babita and all woman like her. You have committed a mistake for not being selfish.😭

Well said...👏👏

Originally posted by: divyadaya13

Only mistake of babita is she is a sweet gullible woman who did not object when her parents got her married at a very young age even though she wanted to study. She obeyed whatever her parents taught her about marriage. She was still a child when she got married. Woman even now are taught to accept whatever husbands and inlaws tell them to do. So she was obeying her wifely dharma. She is 90's generation when most of the time kids did what was expected by their parents. She felt she was making her husband happy by looking after his parents and one day he will definitely call her to him one day or will himself come back. She treated his parents like her own, infact gave them more than what they expected. Gave away precious seventeen years of her young life (This is what is always expected from indian females even now in this generation) with a hope that one day her husband will give her what she expects of him. On the other side mini grew up devoid of her dads love. Dont you think how she might have felt when she saw other kids getting pampered by their dad. Always people talk about ethics and those ethics are decided by those who themselves have not experienced what people like babita and mini have experienced. Insipite of babita being a good daughter, wife and daughter in law was abandoned by each and every one. Yes babita commited a biggest mistake of loving, trusting and respecting her loved ones. Hereafter woman should love only themselves because one day she will be blamed for loving everyone else but herself. Yes babita and all woman like her. You have committed a mistake for not being selfish.😭

Mostly how i feel

How many of you have seen or been der ver bab is or was

I have seen myself and another close friend in that position

Luckily i had no children and i had a bro and bff who helped me cope with the trauma and after 3 years i am remarried with a 2 year old

Do i resent my ex hell yes and wiish him all the worst

It is very easy to say.. But like they say jispe guzarti hai usko pata hai

I share a lot of my exp online with pple not because i want sympathy empathy but so that people learn from mistakes

Life is about living as per u r goals

Truth my dears is a matter of perspective

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

Mostly how i feel

How many of you have seen or been der ver bab is or was

I have seen myself and another close friend in that position

Luckily i had no children and i had a bro and bff who helped me cope with the trauma and after 3 years i am remarried with a 2 year old

Do i resent my ex hell yes and wiish him all the worst

It is very easy to say.. But like they say jispe guzarti hai usko pata hai

I share a lot of my exp online with pple not because i want sympathy empathy but so that people learn from mistakes

Life is about living as per u r goals

Truth my dears is a matter of perspective

I hope you're happy with your remarriage because there are people out there who are unlucky even in remarried lives.

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

Mostly how i feel

How many of you have seen or been der ver bab is or was

I have seen myself and another close friend in that position

Luckily i had no children and i had a bro and bff who helped me cope with the trauma and after 3 years i am remarried with a 2 year old

Do i resent my ex hell yes and wiish him all the worst

It is very easy to say.. But like they say jispe guzarti hai usko pata hai

I share a lot of my exp online with pple not because i want sympathy empathy but so that people learn from mistakes

Life is about living as per u r goals

Truth my dears is a matter of perspective

I am glad you’re happy now. People don’t understand the girls situation. Just blaming them to not take care of marriage.

Wish you all the happiness in your life.

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

Mostly how i feel

How many of you have seen or been der ver bab is or was

I have seen myself and another close friend in that position

Luckily i had no children and i had a bro and bff who helped me cope with the trauma and after 3 years i am remarried with a 2 year old

Do i resent my ex hell yes and wiish him all the worst

It is very easy to say.. But like they say jispe guzarti hai usko pata hai

I share a lot of my exp online with pple not because i want sympathy empathy but so that people learn from mistakes

Life is about living as per u r goals

Truth my dears is a matter of perspective

Originally posted by: RTDeewani

You're right. She admitted that mistake herself and I believe so does everyone agree here. But to put the blame that Babita didn't invest anything to make the relation work is no way acceptable.

She didn't see through his behaviour and gave false assurances to herself, yes. But everything else that went wrong was only due to Ashok and Meeta.

Originally posted by: ic_2000

I am glad you’re happy now. People don’t understand the girls situation. Just blaming them to not take care of marriage.

Wish you all the happiness in your life.

Originally posted by: RTDeewani

Babita stayed back to look after Ashok's parents, not her parents. And the ingrate blamed Babita for staying in India and looking after his own parents. What is Babita's mistake in that? And if she didn't look after his parents, then also he won't be satisfied. What exactly should Babita do in this case? What is her mistake here?

Would the in-laws appreciate the daughter-in-law if she doesn't do household work and just spends all her time romancing/pleasing her husband? There are more evil in-laws in reality who even try to separate the husband and wife if they don't like the daughter-in-law, no matter if the couple is happy.

Ashok went to London only after marrying Babita. At that time, he didn't have any problem with Babita, even though he didn't love her sincerely. Theirs was a typical arranged marriage. He would have made her pregnant just out of his right as her husband and this happens in typical arranged marriages. That should explain how Minnie was conceived without love between Ashok and Babita.

*Edited*

Not all husbands and wives conceive children out of love. Some children are born out of marital rapes and some are conceived by couples who get intimate just to satisfy their physical needs, especially the husbands.

The same would apply to Ashok and Babita. Ashok would have got intimate with her to exercise his husbandly rights and Babita also obliged as he was her husband. What is Babita's mistake in this? When did wife getting intimate with her husband become a mistake?

If Ashok was 17 years away in London, what is Babita's fault in it? It was his choice to go and work in London. Babita didn't send him. He went there, cheated Babita by having an affair with Meeta and even cheated Meeta by hiding his marital status for 3 years. Now, what is Babita's fault here? She stayed faithful to their marriage even when they hardly spent time together for 17 years and this ingrate so easily cheated her with his affair and he's not even guilty about it. Is it Babita's fault here?

If he wanted his wife with him, he could've asked her to come with him to London? Why would she refuse? She would've have come. But he didn't even ask her. So, by default, she will obviously stay back in Patiala, looking after his family. What wrong did she do here?

I don't see what is Babita's mistake here when she's invested her everything into this marriage. Obviously, the culprits are Ashok and Meeta only. Meeta's only mistake is to blindly love Ashok and trying to cover up all his misdeeds he did to Babita and Minnie. Otherwise, sole culprit is only Ashok for ruining the lives of 3 women- Babita, Minnie and soon Meeta.

Originally posted by: divyadaya13

and the feeling is worst because the one who are blaming her are mostly woman.

That’s so true. Sahi kahte hain aurat hi aurat ki dushman hoti hain...😒

Originally posted by: divyadaya13

poor lady confront karke bhi kya ukhaad leti. You saw na how her MIL behaved as soon as she came to know about ashok and his affair immediately she abandoned the most loving babita and supported her useless khoon, even tried to seperate mini from babita by trying to emotionally black mail her. Even babitas brother told babita to compromise with that useless ashok. Babita could take the right decision of leaving khurana house only because of mini. Warna aaj woh idiot khuranaas ke saath saath meeta ki bhi sewa kar rahi hoti.

They say a girl's true home and family is her husband's after marriage. But all women must realize that we will always be treated as outsiders in both our maternal and in-laws' home, no matter how nice and caring we are.

At maternal home, they say betiyaan parayi hoti hain and in sasural, we are non-khoon ka rishta.

Life has no guarantees of happily ever after. A woman must be in a position to fend for herself under such circumstances. Marriage doesn't guarantee eternal security to a woman and it's high time the girls as well as their parents realize this.