Re: 2 shades of Babita',s, Marriage

Now this is break up of Ashok and Babita Marriage has onky person to blame and that is Mita.

Now I disagree strongly on the following points, having seen the Serial from the beginning.

1. This marriage from what is not shown is why Ashok got Married to Babita, as he has no interest in her, the idea that he got married to Babita to look after his Parents. Is so true.

2. They never had a proper Marriage, till they separated they were strangers and awkward every time they came together. Never had a proper Husband/Wife relationship. Being in 2 different Countries is not easy. How on earth they had Mini is beyond me.

3. Mini has been affected for a long time about the lack of her Father's Love etc. This is shown in the beginning. About her attitude etc and the Family including Babita instead of explaining or correcting her behaviour have pampered her instead, hence her rudeness to people and She does not see who is elder to her.

4. There has been no proper Father/Daughter relationship at all. they have been strangers to one another and even Ashok had no idea that She had grown up, hence the doll present.

5.They have had no proper family time at all or happy Marriage, that Mini would have seen.

6. But why is only Mita and Ashok being blamed for the breakup and not Babita, who is equally to blame for the stalemate of her Marriage, there was no love from her, hence Ashok went to Mita.

Another look at Marriage.

A happy Marriage and good Family life etc. They live in Patiala and Ashok falls in love with Mita, Marriage breakup and Babita And Ashok divorced. Babita and Mini heart broken.

So please explain to me why Babita and Mini are behaving like this and why keep on blaming Mita for the breakup, when the Marriage broke up long way back, do why all the dramas erc.

I am sorry but Babuts has only herself to blame.

Babita stayed back to look after Ashok's parents, not her parents. And the ingrate blamed Babita for staying in India and looking after his own parents. What is Babita's mistake in that? And if she didn't look after his parents, then also he won't be satisfied. What exactly should Babita do in this case? What is her mistake here?

Would the in-laws appreciate the daughter-in-law if she doesn't do household work and just spends all her time romancing/pleasing her husband? There are more evil in-laws in reality who even try to separate the husband and wife if they don't like the daughter-in-law, no matter if the couple is happy.

Ashok went to London only after marrying Babita. At that time, he didn't have any problem with Babita, even though he didn't love her sincerely. Theirs was a typical arranged marriage. He would have made her pregnant just out of his right as her husband and this happens in typical arranged marriages. That should explain how Minnie was conceived without love between Ashok and Babita.

*Edited*

Not all husbands and wives conceive children out of love. Some children are born out of marital rapes and some are conceived by couples who get intimate just to satisfy their physical needs, especially the husbands.

The same would apply to Ashok and Babita. Ashok would have got intimate with her to exercise his husbandly rights and Babita also obliged as he was her husband. What is Babita's mistake in this? When did wife getting intimate with her husband become a mistake?

If Ashok was 17 years away in London, what is Babita's fault in it? It was his choice to go and work in London. Babita didn't send him. He went there, cheated Babita by having an affair with Meeta and even cheated Meeta by hiding his marital status for 3 years. Now, what is Babita's fault here? She stayed faithful to their marriage even when they hardly spent time together for 17 years and this ingrate so easily cheated her with his affair and he's not even guilty about it. Is it Babita's fault here?

If he wanted his wife with him, he could've asked her to come with him to London? Why would she refuse? She would've have come. But he didn't even ask her. So, by default, she will obviously stay back in Patiala, looking after his family. What wrong did she do here?

I don't see what is Babita's mistake here when she's invested her everything into this marriage. Obviously, the culprits are Ashok and Meeta only. Meeta's only mistake is to blindly love Ashok and trying to cover up all his misdeeds he did to Babita and Minnie. Otherwise, sole culprit is only Ashok for ruining the lives of 3 women- Babita, Minnie and soon Meeta.

How can you blame a person for being cheated on? If Ashok didn't like Babes, he should have taken the right route. He shouldn't have lied to Mita about his marital status, he should have been upfront about his feelings for his wife, he should have divorced her before looking elsewhere for love. What he did is wrong, what Mita did (staying in the relationship despite knowing that the man she was with had a wife and a daughter) was also wrong. I don't understand how can Babita be painted wrong? Remember when she wanted to know whether he had gifted those earrings to his mother and sister too? She really thought he loved her, she thought he would come back one day for her and his daughter. Till then she didn't complain about anything and just served everyone to the point where she was used. If he didn't like her, that's not her fault. What was she supposed to do?

well put!! i dont understand why people are blaming Babita and Minnie when they are the victims .. What is her fault in taking care of her saas sasur as an ideal wife and bahu .. here Ashok and Mita are culprits not Minnie nor Babita ..

Kya kehne🙄. True babita is the culprit. What can poor ashok do if his wife could not be his partner in real life. Is he not entitled to happiness. So when chance came he went with mita. Let babita die. Who cares. Mini was created by cloning. Ashok did not have any role to play😖.

Tk2015

Again you are missing the point. There Marriage was like a jigsaw puzzle with many pieces, not making a puzzle but bits missing to complete it.

She was married for 17 years and in all this time she never made any effort to make her Marriage work or try. If she had than maybe Ashok would have been coming all the time and not just once in a blue moon. That they were Strangers every time they meet.

No its too easy to give Babita a free pass and say that she is innocent and did not break her marriage. It takes 2 people to tango/or 2 hands to clap and 2 people to make a Marriage work. No Marriage works with 1 person because there are 2 in a marriage. Hence he went looking for it elsewhere.

Just because she was looking after the in laws does not give her a free pass to ignore her Marriage or not have a Father present in Mini's upbringing.

Why the anger now, did she not realize for 17 years that something was missing in her Marriage.

Sorry that's my point and others as well. Not everything is Mita's fault and to blame her point blank is plain stupid. She has only herself to blame. Had she tried her marriage would be still there.

Ashok went to London and forgot Babita and Mini and trapped Mita in his Love tells a lot about him.

Only hope that his Marriage with Mita lasts and he his a good father to his 2nd child this time around.

Originally posted by: guddi01

Tk2015

Again you are missing the point. There Marriage was like a jigsaw puzzle with many pieces, not making a puzzle but bits missing to complete it.

She was married for 17 years and in all this time she never made any effort to make her Marriage work or try. If she had than maybe Ashok would have been coming all the time and not just once in a blue moon. That they were Strangers every time they meet.

No its too easy to give Babita a free pass and say that she is innocent and did not break her marriage. It takes 2 people to tango/or 2 hands to clap and 2 people to make a Marriage work. No Marriage works with 1 person because there are 2 in a marriage. Hence he went looking for it elsewhere.

Just because she was looking after the in laws does not give her a free pass to ignore her Marriage or not have a Father present in Mini's upbringing.

Why the anger now, did she not realize for 17 years that something was missing in her Marriage.

Sorry that's my point and others as well. Not everything is Mita's fault and to blame her point blank is plain stupid. She has only herself to blame. Had she tried her marriage would be still there.

Ashok went to London and forgot Babita and Mini and trapped Mita in his Love tells a lot about him.

Only hope that his Marriage with Mita lasts and he his a good father to his 2nd child this time around.

when you say Babita didnt make her marriage work for 17 years, what do u mean she had to do? her husband wont take her along ? she didnt have courage to leave her in laws .. u believe it or not there are many girls who are still tied in the name of marriage where men leave abroad .. it doesnt mean that the stupid man can cheat on her..dont you think he had a conscious or Moral ethic to follow the promise he made to his wife while leaving her .. he left her with a kid just for the sake of parents and cheated on her and you say she has to make to work .. how impossible people think ..

I will agree Babita is also to be blamed for the state of her marriage. But not by not investing in it or not putting effort to make the marriage work, coz we saw in the initial episodes that she did try to try to get some alone time with him, make him comfortable, make his favorite food, trying to dress up for him etc.. Her mistake was failing to see that her husband was maintaining a distance from her , behaving like a stranger, not interested in anything related to her. They don't seem to have any contact during his stay in London and neither was he part of any parenting decision for Mini. She should have noticed and have confronted him, asked him the reason for his disinterest instead giving herself and mini fake assurances.

And this she herself admitted to Mira's parents that she failed to See the signs.

Only mistake of babita is she is a sweet gullible woman who did not object when her parents got her married at a very young age even though she wanted to study. She obeyed whatever her parents taught her about marriage. She was still a child when she got married. Woman even now are taught to accept whatever husbands and inlaws tell them to do. So she was obeying her wifely dharma. She is 90's generation when most of the time kids did what was expected by their parents. She felt she was making her husband happy by looking after his parents and one day he will definitely call her to him one day or will himself come back. She treated his parents like her own, infact gave them more than what they expected. Gave away precious seventeen years of her young life (This is what is always expected from indian females even now in this generation) with a hope that one day her husband will give her what she expects of him. On the other side mini grew up devoid of her dads love. Dont you think how she might have felt when she saw other kids getting pampered by their dad. Always people talk about ethics and those ethics are decided by those who themselves have not experienced what people like babita and mini have experienced. Insipite of babita being a good daughter, wife and daughter in law was abandoned by each and every one. Yes babita commited a biggest mistake of loving, trusting and respecting her loved ones. Hereafter woman should love only themselves because one day she will be blamed for loving everyone else but herself. Yes babita and all woman like her. You have committed a mistake for not being selfish.😭

Originally posted by: bluecool

I will agree Babita is also to be blamed for the state of her marriage. But not by not investing in it or not putting effort to make the marriage work, coz we saw in the initial episodes that she did try to try to get some alone time with him, make him comfortable, make his favorite food, trying to dress up for him etc.. Her mistake was failing to see that her husband was maintaining a distance from her , behaving like a stranger, not interested in anything related to her. They don't seem to have any contact during his stay in London and neither was he part of any parenting decision for Mini. She should have noticed and have confronted him, asked him the reason for his disinterest instead giving herself and mini fake assurances.

And this she herself admitted to Mira's parents that she failed to See the signs.

She didn't see through his behaviour and gave false assurances to herself, yes. But everything else that went wrong was only due to Ashok and Meeta.