I don't hate Vivaan

Hi guys

I see a lot of " Vivaan I hate you', post the OLV. Especially on Insta. People are really losing their shit and going like that's it I quit and Meera leave him and don't forgive him and I hate him and you get the point.

But the thing is that even after seeing the OLV, I don't hate Vivaan. I don't support his actions but I get him for not trusting Meera.

This is sort of like an analysis post and has all the things that I have wanted to rant about for a while, so brace yourselves, because this is going to be long.

I wanted to talk about Meera first. Her defence of Pammi stems from her deep-rooted belief that no mother can abandon her child. Or should I say no Indian mother can do that and that comes from having a loving mother and family. Irrespective of all of Dolly's shortcomings, she has been a good mother to Meera and till date all the things that she does are done with her best interests in mind. Albeit, they are wrong and messed up and just make things more difficult for Meera, but I think we can all agree that she really does love her. Other tha this believe, there is also the thing that Meera is exceptionally stubborn. She is an individual who is driven by the biases and beliefs that she has formed. So Vivaan is not good because NRI's are not good. Period. For that too change, circumstances had to change and then she finally saw the other side of Vivaan. Its only when she has proof of things being different to her beliefs that she believes in them. Then too quiet begrudgingly, I would say but she still does.

So, maybe that's why I got where she was coming from when without even knowing her, she was ready to defend Pammi. There were also instances which showed that she was defending her for Vivaans sake. She did not want him to have so much hate within him. She wanted him to reconcile and be free of this burden, this hate.

Yet, what I didn't like was the insensitive way she dealt with this issue. I completely understand that you have the right to your own opinion and beliefs, but just because you have one, doesn't mean you can't empathize with the other person, at the very least. I did not appreciate her, throwing it in his face that he was the bad guy and his mother was some mother India reincarnated. Its fine if you think she is good but can't you at the very least, understand where he is coming from. His entire life has been dictated because of that one incidence of his mom abandoning them. There is so much pain, anguish, hatred, loneliness and every other negative emotion filled in him. Doesn't he at the very least deserve a, "I understand where you are coming from.' I get it that they get angry and just can't handle being wrong, but this was a sensitive issue and I would have loved to see meera, sympathize with him. Somehow, the mother issues are never dealt with properly. I had seen another show Sadda Haq and while Sanyukta was supportive I would say, but the first time she got to know about Randhirs issue with his mom, her reaction really disappointed me. He goes like I haven't spoken to my mom in 20 years and her immediate reaction is well so what just speak to her now, cause him speaking to her would be a career boost for them. And I was like, wow. Heck, Parth who was the parallel lead was more sensitive and tried to make her understand Randhir's point of view.

You don't have to have romantic feelings, just a bit of empathy for your fellow humans is all you need. And this is unrealistic and that is bit rich cause this is fiction but still. If in real life, someone trusted us enough to share their bad childhood with us, well irrespective of our equation, I am sure that all of us at the least would say,' I am so sorry.'

I still want to give Meera the benefit of doubt here because I really like her. I am still open to thinking its her anger and stubbornness and her need to hide her feelings, which are stopping her from comforting Vivaan.

Now, coming to Vivaan. I don't blame him for not trusting Meera a 100%. Because irrespective of his current actions he still does trust her to an extent. The pregnancy for instance. Irrespective of the fact that he knows that this is not possible, but the conviction with which she is saying that they are pregnant, makes him want to toss all logic and go with his instinct of trusting Meera. Even if what she is saying is scientifically impossible, he wants to give her the benefit of doubt because he trusts her. But I think being shot at was the last nail in the coffin. According to him, Meera has already gone behind his back and talked to Pammi once, so the most natural thing for him is to assume that she is still in contact with her and she must have told her about her pregnancy and the function. He doesn't think that she was involved in getting him shot but he does think that being the nave fool that she is, she must have mentioned it to Pammi, and is being played by her.

For trust to built Meera should have been up front with him. But she chose to hid things from him. She lied about chatting with her, she didn't tell him that she called an currently she is making the biggest mistake ever by lying about her pregnancy. Here is man and his sister who have a messed-up childhood and are dreaming of reliving theirs through this chid who does not exist. Amaya's excitement breaks my heart. I feel for her family, but I can't help but feel worse for Vivaan and more so for Amaya.

Irrespective of your intent, you cannot nullify the fact that this is a lie and the worse one at that. If courts started basing their judgements on intentions that half the criminals would probably go scot free. Certain things are crimes. Her's I won't say is a crime but it's a huge mistake.

Her past actions and current ones, irrespective of her intent give no reason for Vivaan to trust her. And why should he go against Roma. She is the woman who has been there with them for 20 years now. Even if he doesn't love her, he appreciates the time she has given to them. Why would he trust Meera over her? She hasn't even been able to prove anything as well but has only accused her.

She has helped him and for that he is grateful but that does not make him liable to trust her. Meera pretty much did the same thing during her marriage fiasco as well. She appreciated Vivaan's kindness and trusted him to an extent but when it was his word against her family's she chooses to trust them. She slaps him when he accuses them. And that's fine because even if she knows that Vivaan's a good man why should she believe him over her family. They don't such a relationship yet where they can trust the other blindly.

So, Vivaan is completely justified for not wanting to trust Meera. Her actions, the fact the Roma has been with him for years and also that there is no evidence against her would naturally make him distrust her.

Its his actions that are hurtful. I don't know if this is Bhavna's doing or there was always a dark side to Vivaan. The latter is quite possible. But before that, I just wanted to say that him being driven emotionally does not make him dumb. If he was able to build a business empire does not mean he will be equally good at building relationships. Some people have amazing IQ, they are great at their jobs but have terrible EQ and have strings of failed relationships. There are so many celebrity examples of that. So, I don't think him being violent or aggressive or impulsive, is undermining his intelligence. He is good at his job, doesn't necessarily mean he'll be good at maintaining relationships as well.

Now coming to his dark side. I always felt that he had one. It was like there was always a volcano brewing within, now its erupting. Could be many things. Could be the fact that his life is an absolute chaos, his feelings, the fact that Meera is his wife ow and they share a more intimate relationship now than they did before and then of course there's Pammi and his hatred for her. I don't think his character is completely butchered. I feel like this is another aspect of him, which because of the circumstances, is brimming up to the surface.

I wish Meera wasn't humiliated like she was but that's how it is. I still don't think he told the guards to kick her out. I feel that the fact he turned away was like a cue for the guards that their boss is not interested in continuing this conversation, hence we need to get this lady out of here. But, we will get to know that once the episode airs.

I don't want Meera to leave him either. I want them to repent, I want them to apologize and I want them to grow from this. Every marriage I am sure hits a rough patch at some point, but we don't quit. It would be great, if In TV as well they showed a couple trying to move past their mistakes, rather than the cliched trying to manaofy the other. But it'll probably end up being the next track. This track already has become the track where the FL is right, the ML doesn't get that, he becomes an ass, the FL suffers, the audience loss their shit and sympathize with the FL, irrespective of her batshit crazy antics and plans and then once everything is fine again, then the FL grows a spine overnight and then we have the ML becoming the majnu.

I am still hanging onto this show because I still feel they have potential. What I like about it is that somewhere they are still together, inspite of all the drama and I would love for them to continue being together and learn to appreciate the other and grow in their relationship.

Also, I urge you guys to not quit watching and don't hate on Vivaan cause you know deep down you love him😆. But no seriously, it'll just make you mad and a fictional character isn't worth your anger. It's not so bad still, the characters can still be given the benefit of doubt, they still seem to be on a journey and are showing us their good and bad side. All we need to do is sit back and relax and let the story unfold.

There is still hope.😃

Chandrama😊

PS: Sorry I missed the 'Bahar nikalo ise' 😆 Oh well so much for wishful thinking 😆 Stiil I think if anything Vivaan will atleast realize that anger is toxic. It makes people loss all sensibility. I hope he can learn from his mistakes in the future 😊

Originally posted by: sheen97

Hi

I also made similar post regarding vivaan kapoor

This is the same guy but now just a diff side exactly like we humans have. This anger is justified bcz of what he went through . And i also believe that approach of meera should have been different rather than justifying a lady he havent met she should have sided with vivaan and convinced him to find his mom .

Meera matters to vivaan and Vivz expect something from meera even he does know that

But meera supporting pammi some where deep.inside make him feel he must have been wrong

I actually feel for vivaan bcz when truth will.come to fore he will be the one who will be shattered and hurt most

But honestly i want their marriage to end bcz their marriage has a weak foundation it was built on sympathy , lack of trust

I want them to separate , analyse why the prensce of other affect them so.much and start over

This time relation ship being build on basis of love and immense trust

Originally posted by: The_May_Rose

I can not hate Vivaan or want MeerVaan to separate due to Roma...

I can not watch as the writers ruin Vivaan, make Meera look stupid for not stopping all contact with PK and the vamps win every time without any respite for MeerVaan's relationship.

I can understand it can be kinda frustrating but for me if I look at the bigger picture, their behaviors kind of make sense. Vivaan I still feel is not 100% ruined, this just happens to be the bad side of him. for Meera, I think that since she has lived such a sheltered life, she has clearly never come in contact with evilness such as Roma. Even if Laali did not like her, but prior to her marriage with Vivaan she didn't hate her. It's only since she ruined Silkys prospect of being his wife that Laali's dislike turned into hatred. So, I think she is trying to do the best she can in this situation but is failing miserably because she is up against a woman who has spent all her life plotting and scheming to reach where she has today.

Ya I know that feeling when Vamps always win. I used to watch a show called Mere Angne mein and while it'll always be my favourite show, I will always be mad at the fact that the Vamps were never brought to justice. The good people suffered all throughout and the Vamps enjoyed 😡 But thats ITV I guess 😭

Anger makes a person blind but Vivaan's behaviour in the OLVs is outrageous. The man who saved Meera countless times and can never see her hurt, will order his security to push her out? Not once has he thought back to how SM used black magic accusations and paid Laali to lie about the Dhingra's. If he is angry at Meera for her blind faith in fake PK, he should question the intentions of the vamps too.

I know its outrageous. That's why I said that I support him not trusting Meera but wish he didn't humiliate her like that. But then again, maybe that is what they are trying to show that anger drives you to the point that you lose all humanity and sensibility. The same woman he has always protected is the one he is throwing out. Its hurtful but I guess in some ways that is the reality. I had read a book on Partition and it was full of stories of how families who were so close irrespective of the fact if they were Hindu or Muslim, turned their backs on each other when the political atmosphere changed.

I am by no means comparing the horrors of that situation to Vivaan's anguish. I am just trying to draw a parallel between humans who in anger and hatred can commit crimes like Vivaan is doing. It will be hard to move past these actions of his. If shown properly it can be a good track post this PK track where Meera can be hurt and he can be repenting. It would be great if they can show them trying to working on their feelings and marriage but that probably won't happen. Meera would probably walk away and that's fine. That can be a fun track if they don't make it super cliched.

I hate Roma, Laali and I love/hate Dolly. The rest of the Dhingra's love Meera but do nothing to make her life better or help her even when they know Laali's intentions. I accept vamps exist in serials but not to the extent that they ruin the story of the leads or there is no sign of their blooming love story...

I second you I hate Romali. Dolly and Dhingras, I guess are that quentessial family who tell their daughter that maybe its her fault for not being able to adjust in her husbands house even if she rocks up at their door all black and blue. So maybe thats why I wasn't too surprised when they didn't show the messages to Vivaan. For them its like if we accuse Roma then she might make life more difficult for Meera and her marriage might break. So as messed up as that thought is, they can literally do anything to see Meera lead a happy married with Vivaan.

May_Rose I am literally the resident stalker of this forum and you are always so positive it's sad to see you lose hope 😭

I think they are trying to wrap up the PK track and then their love story will start. Its already started. They went from divorce to taunting the other for leaving, to wanting to kill someone for shooting at their better half and to now admitting that they had a relation, even if they say it's over now. Their love story is there but just getting overshadowed by the drama, like you said. In the long run, though I guess it'll just make them stronger as people and couple.

Originally posted by: DivanPathi

May be vivaan is deliberately separating from Meera to keep her nd the baby safe...He wants to end the relationship to that she stays out of this matter

.I don't think he believes that Meera is helping pammi kapoor in harming him... I feel that after sonikudi incident he is worried about Meera and his baby's safety

Even in today's episode he clearly said that pammi kapoor is taking advantage of her innocence

Originally posted by: UKGirl22

But isn't the same Vivaan who did not tell Meera about Sumair. Did not tell her parents either. Tried to solve it on his own and caused her to face the biggest insult any woman could face. And she is still trying to help him.

Saying he caused it is a bit harsh. That's like saying Meera caused Amaya's molestation. I am by no means saying all the decisions Vivaan's taken so far are right but he can't be held responsible for what Sumair did. Just like Meera can't be held responsible for Amaya venturing out on her own.

But even after she misunderstood Vivaan, he still stuck around and tried to help her as well. Married her to protect her dignity. When people were saying that all she will be good at is pleasuring different men, he stood up for her and gave her his name and the respect to stand up tall with her head high. The praise she got from PK at the function, the societal tons quick forgiveness of her supposed misdeeds all comes from being Vivaan's wife. He could have left her when she accused him, slapped him but he didn't. Just like Meera isn't now. Just like even post their marriage she blamed him for the video, Vivaan blamed her for Amayas condition but they didn't walk out on each other. They have both made mistakes that have cost the other but they are still in this together. I am by no means against Meera and that's why I said I am still ready to give her that chance to fix the soup she has landed herself in. What I did say was that it would have been great if she had been a bit more empathetic towards Vivaans plight and that she shouldn't have outright lied about her pregnancy. Her hiding things from Vivaan, I can understand even if I don't approve, just like I didn't approve Vivaan not confronting Meera about Sumair, but the pregnancy is too messed up a lie. I know her intent is clear but it's important to be driven by the consequences of your actions in certain situations and not your intentions. But since I really like her character a lot, I still have hope that she'll be able to fix things when the truth comes out.

He is also the same vivaan who did not believe her when the Russian guy manhandled her and she told him that he had. He instead spoke to her about these things are normal. And she is still trying to help him.

She never told him he molested her. He never let her speak and that is why he had no clue that she had been molested. He normalized flirting not molestation. The moment he saw her ripped dress and joined the dots to realize what might have happened, he went down and canceled the deal.

Its akin to saying that even when Meera accused him for the Mehendi fiasco, he still went ahead and helped her.

He is also the man who has raised his hand twice to hit her. And she is still trying to help him.

Meera git him as well yet he came to save her, got beaten up for her and married her. Its the second HR which was more of an issue for me but then considering his actions now which are equally wrong all I can think of is that anger is a toxic emotion

As much as you are finding excuses for why vivaan is flawed, so is Meera. Even before meeting vivaan every scene involving Meera and her mom and often extended family has been one where they don't care about what she wants or dreams about or is good at. All they care about is her duty as a daughter and daughter-in-law. She seems to be someone who has sacrificed her entire life for her family. Even the way she talked to vivaan during that blood donation scene. It just broke my heart. And is constantly made to feel worthles. so yes abs is trying to help in her own flawed way (and I admit it is flawed).

No offense but I think you are misinterpreting my post as a Meera vs Vivaan post.

I am not trying to find excuses for anyone's behaviours here. To me, each of their behaviours make sense, irrespective of if they are in line with my own morals and ideals. I might not approe of the characters behaviours but understand where they are coming from, based on their character sketch. This goes for both Meera and Vivaan. If you don't think his actions are justifiable to you, thats completely cool. I am by no means trying to force my opinion down your throat. Its perfectly fine if you think Vivaan is irredeemable.

As for her family, I think it's only ever been her mom who was obsessed with getting her married. Except for that scene when she wanted to play kabaddi but her marriage happened to be on the same day, in all other scenes her family has supported her against Dolly.

And dolly doesn't mean to put her down or hurt her. She just comes from a school of thought wherein a woman's primary goal should be to be a good wife and daughter in law. And the And the atmosphere of the society is such that every parent is vying for a NRI husband for their daughter so I guess she feels that if Meera doesn't change her demeanour she will be left behind. She doesn't value her kabaddi because according to her a prfession should ot be a womans priority but I don't think she wnts her to feel like a good for nothing. And neither does Meera feel like one. She is self confident and self assured irrespective of what the society might say about her.

Also she didn't sacrifice her kabaddi for her family. She had gone to play the match irrespective of her mother telling her to not go. She gave up on it for Vivaan. I wouldn't say gave up on kabaddi but she gave up n an opportunity for Vivaan. Post that she has herself been so entagled in her married life that she hasn't had the chance to go back. Vivaan on the other hand does want her to go back to it again, he doesn't have a problem with her playing. He urged her to take it up as a profession in that dosti scene. And like I had said in this other post of mine, Meera does not regret giving up that one shot she had of makin it big. Her priorities shifted somehere along the line. She is more inclined towards being there for Vivaan now than playing kabaddi and as long as its her choice, I am fine with it. Its only when she is being forced to give up on her dreams do I feel bad. And Viaan is grateful for her giving up her kabaddi match to help him, which is why he confronted Sumair.

But like I said helping each other does not make them liable to truust the other person, it makes them liable to nbeing grateful and that they are.

That blood donation scene was more of Meeras guilt that took a shot at her sef worth but post that and even during that I have never felt like she was questioning her actions. Even during that second hand raise she cearly said she will do what she thinks is right. She is still opiniated and believes in herself. In the hospital however the circumstances were such that her guilt took over and she couldn't help but question herself for Amayas condition.

Yup she is flawed and so is Vivaan and I am perfectly ok with it. Again I might not approve of their actions but I support them both and get where they are coming from.

But for me Vivaan is on another scale of cruelty and insensitivity!!!

That's fine you have every right to feel that way 😊