Edited.
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"Ya Allah, please mujhpe mehmat farmaye. Mujhe aapki zaroorat hai . meri zindagi mein sukoon le aye... with her eyes closed, Zoya sat on the carpeted floor making dua. Her face was bended downwards settled atop of her hands, brought together up to chest. Since the past ten months, the truth had come out shattering the earth beneath her it hurt to even breathe. She could feel the ache in her heart which felt like she was physically having chest aches, but in reality her heart hurt. It's true when they say; you don't physically heart your heart shattering into piece when you're heart-broken. But it hurt dammit. She wanted to yell it out, scream on the top of her lungs, letting it all out. She tried it out in her bedroom, delving her face into the cushioned pillow... but she couldn't. She couldn't even cry anymore even if she wanted to weep, she couldn't tear up now. It's been insanely tough everyday, taking it one step at a time to move on, she'd felt hollow.
Five damn years. It's no joke. She gave away her five years, madly, deeply, and insanely with all her heart and soul to someone who didn't even deserve it. At all. Her blind trust, her naivety, her innate innocence, her hasi, the twinkle in her eyes, her carefree self, her dil she had given it all away, without a doubt or question. Where did she go wrong? Or maybe these five years, were a hard-hit reality that sprung her and crushed her, wanted her to feel the real world, which she hadn't realized during her stay in Mussoorie. Coming to Mumbai had made her realize everything the hurdles, gaining her confidence, her independence, meeting harsh critics, being jailed, her reputation ruined, her life threw her onto the ground so hard- shattering everything she had built her life upon. Given her life to. Jisko dil de diya, apna sab kuch lauta diya, woh shaayad mohabbat thi hi nahi. Mohabbat. Kya cheez hai. Ab toh, is se bhi ihtebar uth gaya.
She had invested all her energy, time, and insane amount of hard work into her own company; zoya. Betrayel had not only hit her life, but also the company which all this time she was trying to flourish. And she did. Day and night = her goal was to bring up the company into the market making it hers. She paid back all the debt that was overdue in these last couple of months. Like a bitter aftertaste, staying in Zosh felt the same, but on a much more 10X scale. On every nook and corner, she felt the betrayal and so she changed her location to central Mumbai opening up a brand new office, renaming it after her name, with the same staff and more interns now that it was now back into the market with larger profits, and a completely new interior outlook according to her taste. Chic and classy. Her very own.
She had come to the Dargah to give her gratitude to God for his graciousness, but also, prayed for solitude, to keep giving her strength to move on completely and officially, even though what she had gone through had been traumatic, but she came to ask for his rehmat. Sometimes in her randomest, but quietest moments- this hollowness and sometime bitter memories would come back. It hurt. A little less this time. She prayed for this hollowness to go away, for the bitter memories to not haunt her anymore in her subconscious, for her happiness. For her to be completely free carefree.
She had also patched up with her family, three months back, asking for their forgiveness for much it would've hurt them that she went against them to get married, to someone that she wasn't even married to five years down the line as she had supposedly thought she was so madly in love and that she would die without him, couldn't imagine her life without him being part of it- and here she was many months later dealing with her grief, with a much lighter heart. She had learnt to give herself that independence, flying away from the shell she had thought will always keep her protected, learnt to deal with people becoming more resilient and immune to harsh rumours, learn to love herself, to go easy on her self she had definitely come a long way. Two month later since then, she had moved out her ex-inlaws and brought a two bed-room apartment wanting to leave all negativities of her life behind. Her parents had been asking to pay them a visit again and she wanted to go back just as much.
Deeply into thoughts, she sat on a bench under a small courtyard right into the dargah in a secluded corner, overlooking the tiny garden blooming with the tinniest of flowers as she waited for the rain to slow down into a drizzle before making her away out.
Fifteen minutes later, that's how Adi found her sitting on a bench, resting her head onto the wall behind her, her eyes dazed on the rain drops which had slowed into a rhythmic drizzle.
"yahan hai aap! Kabse aap ko doodh raha hoon, pata hai? As he sat right beside her, smiling as he nudged her bringing her out of her thoughts, clad in a knee-length white chooridaar with black leggings and a black shawl which covered her head and upper arms, with small tiny studs scattered all over with a gold net lace border. "Is Dargah ke andar ka raasta itna confusing hai. Questioning her with why she didn't answer his phone calls as he held up her phone to her level, showing her 5 missed calls.
"Sorry, Adi. I hadn't realized. Jabse Dargah ayi, phone silent pe kardiya tha. Yaad hi nahi raha check karna. Baarish ka rukne ka interzar kar rahi thi. Sighing he softly raked a hand through his damp hand, shaking his head lightly as he looked over outside the courtyard as some of the mist landed on zoya's face, blinking a couple of times, she wiped away looking over at him. He was clad in a button down white shirt with some wetness around his upper arms and ribs area with two top buttons left undone tucked into his navy chino trousers. His black leather jacket laid on his lap.
Noticing his narrowed eyes focused on the rain drops slowly drizzling, his eyelashes holding up a bit of moisture as he supported a stubble since the past month or so, which suited him quite well as she focused on his face. She even noticed he was wearing a white button-down his favourite colour. So was hers. One of the many things they discovered about each other sharing each other likes and dislikes, but more so she'd notice him wearing white on many occasions and she even had lots of tops and kurta's consistent of white. Most of her wardrobe was all white and ivory. His mouth stretched into a tiny, lazy smile as he dragged his vision away towards her face, settling his focus realizing she was immersed on his face, as he felt her eyes on him as him.
"Kya baat hai. Aaj aap ki nazrein meray chehre se hat nahi rahin, huh.' Pulling up his eyebrows, eyes full of twinkle in teasing manner, supported by his signature smirk.
"Nahi toh. A-aisi koi baat nahi hai. Realizing she got caught, she quickly averted her gaze on to her lap, fingers fidgeting.
few of the times, he had realized he was glancing at her more-so, when she was completely immersed in her work or during her meeting while she passionately talked to clients, or over a meal or coffee while she would be scanning the menu. Once or twice, he did get caught and he had smoothly averted from the situation, recently a week or so back. And now, he fully caught her this time. The other two times, she had averted her glance before he would even realize and didn't wanna embrass her- but he still did as he did now teasing her. It felt good teasing her, seeing all flustered and then laughing it off moreso, him than them together. Just as she sat now, all adorable, flustered, trying to deny it all.
"Aisay kaise ho sakta hai. Mainay khud aapko dekha, mujhe dekhte huay. Woh bhi aisi nazar se... he playfully countered as her hazel eyes went bigger in astonishment, meeting his chocolate brown ones.
"'S'cuse me. Kehna kya chahte hai aap. K-kaisi nazar, huh. She tried countering back. After a beat, "boliyee. Not getting a comeback, trying to not avert her eyes this time.
Scooting a bit closer, "Acha... bol doon. Her hazel doe-eyes widened even more as she swallowed awaiting his answer.
She felt him faintly and just as sofly picking up her left hand, as she felt his fingers clasping her own giving away the tinniest of tingles and extending her arm over his chest merely touching it, not completely. "Aisi nazar... jo dil ko chhu le. Jis se dil ke dharkanay tez ho jaye...itne tez ke- his pulse picked up a little and so did hers as he muttered the words, making her go all nervous, with his hooded gaze. "-hasi nikal jaye. He sputtered quickly, laughing loudly, more-so seeing her heightened nervousness. Snatching her arm away, as she realized she smacked her upper left arm which was still damp.
"ha ha very funny. Screw you. She got hastly, pulling her shawl around her tighter, walking away. "mujhe ab lunch bhi nahi karna. Khudhi jayega. As he chuckled once more, realizing her words, skipping after her. "Aree, Zoya. Baat toh suno. I was just joking, man. Zoya!
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They were stuck in traffic as he made round-about from the Dargah. She ended the call from Noor, telling her she'll her a bit later in an hour or so. Adi turned towards Zoya, "I can't believe you've taken my joke seriously. You never take my jokes seriously. Jokes are meant
Letting out a laugh, "are meant to be jokes. Chuckling, "I know silly. Apko laga aap hi mazak kar sakte hain. Dar gaye na.
Wide-eyed at what just happened, he lost to his own joke. "Main daroon ga? Pagal samjha hai. He scoffed.
"Nahi toh aur kya. He softly still laughed.
"Dekho- About to counter back with his argument, nine year old boy came up to his window, softly knocking. As the window came down, the boy, well practiced, utter "bhaiya. Gajras le le jiye na. Meherbani ko ki aapki. Sirf 50 rupee.
Adi fondly looked over the kid, about to decline him. He had never even bought gajras before. Not when she' was around, or even before her. She never wore them and not even his mother. Grabbing his wallet, he into looking grabbing a 200, paying him extra anyway. The kid looked over to the passenger seat, really wanting to sell the last two off. "Pleaj, bhaiya. Le le jiye na. Didi ke le li jye. Unpe sundar bhi lage ge. Bahut taza hai, abhi abhi-"
In the midst of searching through the bills, a flashback of a thought struck him of Zoya re-calling her times at her parents, before the wedding especially on Eid, her mother would get her Gulab and motiye walay gajras (Rose+jasmine), freshly brought from the near-by flower shop, one-set to wear on both arms, first thing when she got ready. Or every grand occasion, including weddings. She had cherished the moments, getting emotional. Telling him how much she missed it all now that she was in Mumbai. She hadn't a chance to buy fresh ones and there was no such occasion. Looking over to the one set the child was holding, it was the same gulab and motiye gajras, she had described.
Extending his arm with a 200 bill, plus a 100 rupees zoya had on her being the only smaller bill other than 500 ones, she nudged Adi to take to give it over together. The kid packed in a clear small bag. "Saab, change nahi hai.
"it's okay. Rakh lo. Tumharay liye hai.
"Shukriya saab or ma'am. Bahut achay hain aap dono. Aap dono hamesha salamat rahe. Smiling widely, he ran off across the street. They both sat there a little struck at the kids words and at the honking, they came out their reverie as Adi pulled up on to the next corner.
"Yeh aap ke liye.
"Lekin Adi. Mein toh-
"I know.
As the thought struck her suddenly, "Aap ko yaad tha?
"Aap kuch kahein, aur mujhe yaad na rahe. Aap ki har baat yaad rakhta hoon.
Blushing slightly, "thanks Adi. That's sweet of you. Lekin apko taqalluf nahi karna chahiye tha. It's ok.
"Aree, ab toh le bhi liye. Ab, please accept kar lo. Abhi ke abhi.
softly chuckling, "Acha, ok. Lekin pehne ke liye kahin special jana bhi nahi hai. Thoda weird lage ga.
Shaking his head internally at this girl who had out grown herself, was now getting conscious on wearing gajre in broad daylight, aisi he. Taking it out of the bag, he delicately extended his hand forward, looking over into her eyes and he held her hand and brought it forward. Lightly grabbing the gajras, he gently slid over her wrist one by one, on each arm, not averting his gaze, even when she tried to avert hers, she caught him looking over intently the whole time he slid it on hers. The intense fragrance quickly filled his bmw.
Cricket
