hitting your child. - Page 2

Originally posted by: indygirl

Oh no !!! I beg to differ !! I was a school teacher , i taught KG and Class 1 for a while in a very rich school !! There were some kids who were so spoilt that it was tempting to spank them ( Though we weren't even allowed to touch the kid ................so it was out of the question ) . There were these International kids - 7 year old, Korean Boys , who were embassy kids . I tell you , they were so badly behaved , forget listening to a teacher , they spat at you if you tried to disclipine them in some way . They had ADHD and wouldn't sit for a minute , they would climb desks and bars on the window when the class was n session . You couldn't do time out with them , as they wouldn't listen . You couldn't make them stand outside the classroom ( like it happened to us in school) , because they would go to the play ground . How many times could i send them to the principal ???
In PTA whenever you spoke to the parent , you had to mince your words and tell them that they were active kids that need to be kept busy . Their parents had such a terrible - defensive attitude !! Couldn't do anything !! Just had to wait it out to send them to next class next year . NOW such kids deserved to be disclipined at home , maybe a little slap may have helped from their parent .
You need to be a parent OR a teacher to realise how tough it is raise kids right !! Not all kids need TLC................. Tough Love and Care .......some just need Tender Love and Care !! Its different with every child !!

its undastandalbe if their behaviour is like how u sed bt wat bout the children who dont behave dat way do they really deserve it?

deepti like said at the end of my post , all chldren are different and should be treated thus .Not all kids need very strict disclipining . As a teacher i have given time out for my class kids for a bit naughty . It works on them . But on some kids this doesn't help a bit . Those kids need disclipning .

i agree wid u some kids needs do need discipline

Originally posted by: indygirl

deepti like said at the end of my post , all chldren are different and should be treated thus .Not all kids need very strict disclipining . As a teacher i have given time out for my class kids for a bit naughty . It works on them . But on some kids this doesn't help a bit . Those kids need disclipning .

That's the crucial point - some kids need disciplining,that too at different stages of their life.

My older kid was very hyper, very aggressive and very naughty till the age of 3 and half. He needed regular spanking, and a good dose of strict behaviour, time outs and different forms of punishments to keep him in check. Yet today he has become very cool, and if I so much even touch him without good reason, he lets me know that I was wrong.. He still gets hyper at times, but in general, he is now a very sensitive, intelligent and a caring little boy with a terriffic insight as to what is wrong and right. So while till he was 3 yrs I was at my wits end, after that he has been such a good kid that I don't even have to raise my voice.

In contrast, my little one has been an angel, very quiet, very gentle. But now that he is two and a half, I see him getting naughtier by the day 😆.I still don't have to spank him or even punish him by giving time outs, but I might have to, soon......

Originally posted by: usachick821

we all hav probably been spanked before, or slapped by our parents, but sometimes parents that mean well for their children often end up abusing them without even knowing it. So should hitting your child b prohibited in india? Is prohibiting hitting your child the only solution so that children in homes do not get abused?

i think any type of physical abuse, be it something minimal as a small spanking, to an extreme beating, is unnecessary. there are other ways to get your children to behave without resorting to such measures.

i dont know if anyone here has watched "supernanny". its about a professional nanny who visits homes with children who are out of control. She teaches parents how to communicate with their children. such tactics like hitting or yelling are never used by her, and when she is done, the children are very well behaved.

at school in english we did a little bit about this so i'll just say wot we read about it.

1) parents hit their children but the children dont know wot they have done wrong so they do it again to find out. they cant learn from their mistakes if they dont know what that mistake is.

2)when parents hit their children they often get carried away and the result is their child starts to hate his/;her parents, and many parentsd feel really guilty

3)parents hit their children to tell them that wot they r doing is wrong. but, a child does not have enough knoledge of life to understand this. the child thinks the parents hate him/her and they start hate their parents

my view is that if a parent hits a child they should also realise that they need to tell there child why they are gettin hit. but no parent should actually be allowed to hit their child so that the child gets hurt or feels that his/her parents hate them.

^ those are very true reasons. children sometimes dont understand what they did wrong if the only explanation they will get is a slap on the face.

but i think that if a child makes a mistake, then the parent should first take them aside, and look them into the eye and tell them calmly that what they are doing is wrong and they should not do it again. and i think a simple thing as a time out can really make a better difference. also, reward your child for good behavior so that they will be encouraged to display that behavior more. it might be a slow process, but it will take away the need to hit your child.

Hi!
Hitting your child... depends on what kid of a hit it is. I am against child abuse but I see that kids do need a bit of spanking for the sake of discipline. If an American were to answer this post, he/she would be strictly against them. I even heard that the laws are strict enough to get even the parents jailed for a child abuse. If you ask me if this is right or wrong... depends on the kind of kid. Some parents span kids on very little things and that is not good. Kids are like god's angels and to avoid such hitting/spanking sequels, the upbringing of the child should be given specific importance so that they learn by understanding words and not by hits/spanks.
I am not a mummy. In fact, I am not even married! As a counselor, I have had a few clients who come with this problem and I advise this to them. :-) Let your child have a healthy growth with healthy thoughts... they are the vital citizens of tomorrow...
Thanks!

Best wishes,
Fatmah Azam