priveer TS: the wedding that shocked O family(completed on page 3)

JuneBorn thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#1
Hey guys im starbright9. this is my first ever creation. actually i wrote from my school with the help of my best friend. its not so poetric or creative. but still, i hope tht u enjoy it...
THE WEDDING THAT SHOCKED OBEROI FAMILY..

It was a pleasant day. The oberois are sitting in the hall. Everyone was excited about Valentine's day..

Pinky says in excitement:Oh my Mata..! valentines day aa rahi hai. Aur mujhe pata hai ki meri shakti ji meri lye koi surprise zaroor ready kar raka hoga. Aakhir valentines day hote hai lovers ke liye. Haina shakti ji?

Shakti gives an awkward look. Rudra whispers in saumya's ears "tum valentines special kab vroadcast kar rahi ho?

Saumya replies "mein jab karungi tab karungi! Rudra says "main bas pooch raha tha! Shivaay sees them and asks "tum log kya baat kar rahi ho?

Rudra:kuch nahi,bas aise hi..

Omkara: waise prinku kaha hai..?

"yaha hai" said a solid voice from the entrance of oberoi mansion. Everyone turned to that side. "priyanka singh oberoi ya mein kahoon..priyanka singh randhawa." Said ACP ranveer singh randhawa who have hold hold priyanka's wrist firmly. There was sindoor in priyanka's forehead and mangalsutr onnher neck n both have worn varmala.

Everyone stands up from the couch, all shocked that their princess have married eloping. It was like a earthquack have occurred.

Ranveer had a smirk on his face while priyanka was crying badly. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. Her eyes have turned a little reddish. She was struggling to free her hand from ranveer's hold.

Tej comes to front and asks her whats going on. She was about to say something. But before she could say anything, tej slaps her on her face

She falls on ranveer's chest. She could not move. She slowly looked up to see ranveer who was looking at her. For a moment, they got lost in each other's eyes. When she realized it, she got startled and pulled herself away from ranveer.

Pinky started to accuse jhanvi saying "yeh sab jethaniji ki hi galti hai. Bachon ko sahi raste dikhaana ek maa ka farz hota hai. Jethaniji toh bas bottle chadati hi rahte hai." Jhanvi felt so shamed by pinky's words and looked down. Tej was looking angrily at jhanvi.

Dadi had tears in her eyes and asks pinky to stop it. She came towards priyanka and says "puthar, agar teri mann mein aise kuch baat hota toh mujhe bata dete, hum karwa lethe tum dono ki shaadi. She felt really sad seeing dadi cry because of her, but she couldn't do anything.

Suddenly, shivaay felt a pain in his chest and everyone ran towards him. Priyanka shouts "bhaiyya..." and started to ran towards him but ranveer stops her holding her hand..

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So thts it, plz do comment n comment honestly tht wht do i have to change in it or wht do i have to add in it bcuz i could only improve if i know my faults. so plz do comment

Edited by starbright9 - 9 years ago

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dimaag thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#2
Hey Star bright!
It's very nice and intriguing my friend 😃. I am very happy to read it, particularly when there's a drought for our fandom. The getting slapped and falling on Ranveer's chest sounded to me like that of ASR-Khushi marriage(IPKKND). And don't worry your OS is really nice and interesting to be honest 😊. Your first creation and that too for this couple is very brilliant. Can see that happen in front me(the whole thing). One question:. Are you doing to turn it into a TS or SS?
Because there's no way we are letting you leave us like this on the edge of the cliff hanging 😉.Do continue soon. Another question: is Shivaay having a heart attack now ? What will be Om-Ru reaction? Anika -soummya? There's many more. So plz continue soon. U have added very essential aspect that needs to be taken here(if it is the first chapter 😉). Regarding the second chapter, I think Om-ACP tashan will set the chords right. It's upto u always,what u like to see 😉.
Mrs.KimTaeHyung thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: dimaag

Hey Star bright!
It's very nice and intriguing my friend 😃. I am very happy to read it, particularly when there's a drought for our fandom. The getting slapped and falling on Ranveer's chest sounded to me like that of ASR-Khushi marriage(IPKKND). And don't worry your OS is really nice and interesting to be honest 😊. Your first creation and that too for this couple is very brilliant. Can see that happen in front me(the whole thing). One question:. Are you doing to turn it into a TS or SS?
Because there's no way we are letting you leave us like this on the edge of the cliff hanging 😉.Do continue soon. Another question: is Shivaay having a heart attack now ? What will be Om-Ru reaction? Anika -soummya? There's many more. So plz continue soon. U have added very essential aspect that needs to be taken here(if it is the first chapter 😉). Regarding the second chapter, I think Om-ACP tashan will set the chords right. It's upto u always,what u like to see 😉.


Sahi kaha...

Even i want it to be A TS or Ss...

Dont leave it in half way please...

If continuing... continue soon... cant wait for more 😉
arohiarsh16 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#4
woow...its realy awesome...amazing...
I am so excited fr next update...pls do continue soon...
Edited by arohiarsh16 - 9 years ago
JuneBorn thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: dimaag

Hey Star bright!
It's very nice and intriguing my friend 😃. I am very happy to read it, particularly when there's a drought for our fandom. The getting slapped and falling on Ranveer's chest sounded to me like that of ASR-Khushi marriage(IPKKND). And don't worry your OS is really nice and interesting to be honest 😊. Your first creation and that too for this couple is very brilliant. Can see that happen in front me(the whole thing). One question:. Are you doing to turn it into a TS or SS?
Because there's no way we are letting you leave us like this on the edge of the cliff hanging 😉.Do continue soon. Another question: is Shivaay having a heart attack now ? What will be Om-Ru reaction? Anika -soummya? There's many more. So plz continue soon. U have added very essential aspect that needs to be taken here(if it is the first chapter 😉). Regarding the second chapter, I think Om-ACP tashan will set the chords right. It's upto u always,what u like to see 😉.

im so happy u like it😊😊. me too is feeling tht its so incomplete, so i might continue it n ur questions mayb answered in tht update 😉. n yeah tht getting slapped scene is actually inspired from IPKKND.
JuneBorn thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: princess1222


Sahi kaha...

Even i want it to be A TS or Ss...

Dont leave it in half way please...

If continuing... continue soon... cant wait for more 😉


im so glad tht u liked it 😊😊. i'll b continuing it soon
JuneBorn thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: arohiarsh16

woow...its realy awesome...amazing...
I am so excited fr next update...pls do continue soon...


😊😊thnk u n glad u liked it. i'll b continuing it soon
Anika_PreRish thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#8
u need to continue this... this is excellent.
Aamna_18 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#9
Very interesting, can't wait for the next update. Really happy that I got a little dose of priveer 😊
Tahiti-1 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#10
This is really good!!!
😊
Keep up the good work girl!!! ❤️

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