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One of the difficulties in life is to respond/comment intelligently on a post which is so well thought out, so wonderfully written, that its really already said it all. What is left to add to the discussion? 😊
Seriously Jean, what a lovely post. Hats off to you. I think you really get the way Sanskaar's mind works, something I've been trying to explore in a few of my OS/TS/SS.
I just loved the way you put this: ""It is pretty obvious how painful it is for him to carry out each ritual and when it is finally done he closes his eyes in pain and can't even look at her. Talk about irony: the one who is in love doesn't want to marry and is feeling tormented when doing so, while the one who isn't in love wants to marry and is too busy concentrating on other things to realize what she's asked Sanskaar to give up. Because by agreeing to give up his peace of mind and sense of right and wrong regarding marriage, Sanskaar will have given away a big part of what he believes in.""
Bang on, I must say. Though it is Sanskaar who is in love right now, not Swara, it is he who is having the more difficult time with this marriage. Because he is sacrificing his dreams of how his love should have been brought to fruition, how he would have wanted his marriage to be. Because, somewhere, he may still have the nagging feeling that Swara doubts his intentions: perhaps she still feels he is secretly happy (or at least, not sad), about the marriage? (I actually don't think she thinks that any more--he clarified his position loud and clear yesterday and she certainly looked as if she believed that. But Sanskaar might feel she still doubts him a bit, and that would wound him terribly). Plus, Swara has sense of anger & disappointment at Lakshya's continued mistrust, to divert her mind/ carry her through this. What's the succor for Sanskaar?
I have nothing more to add really. But just wanted to say again how much I loved your analysis below, and that I agree with you 100%:
Seriously Jean, what a lovely post. Hats off to you. I think you really get the way Sanskaar's mind works, something I've been trying to explore in a few of my OS/TS/SS.
I just loved the way you put this: ""It is pretty obvious how painful it is for him to carry out each ritual and when it is finally done he closes his eyes in pain and can't even look at her. Talk about irony: the one who is in love doesn't want to marry and is feeling tormented when doing so, while the one who isn't in love wants to marry and is too busy concentrating on other things to realize what she's asked Sanskaar to give up. Because by agreeing to give up his peace of mind and sense of right and wrong regarding marriage, Sanskaar will have given away a big part of what he believes in.""
Bang on, I must say. Though it is Sanskaar who is in love right now, not Swara, it is he who is having the more difficult time with this marriage. Because he is sacrificing his dreams of how his love should have been brought to fruition, how he would have wanted his marriage to be. Because, somewhere, he may still have the nagging feeling that Swara doubts his intentions: perhaps she still feels he is secretly happy (or at least, not sad), about the marriage? (I actually don't think she thinks that any more--he clarified his position loud and clear yesterday and she certainly looked as if she believed that. But Sanskaar might feel she still doubts him a bit, and that would wound him terribly). Plus, Swara has sense of anger & disappointment at Lakshya's continued mistrust, to divert her mind/ carry her through this. What's the succor for Sanskaar?
I have nothing more to add really. But just wanted to say again how much I loved your analysis below, and that I agree with you 100%:
""Frankly, this marriage will be his biggest sacrifice yet and I feel sorry for him.Though it was a result of circumstances I'm sure he meant every vow and will honor them without any expectations from his wife. I am quite sure, in fact I seriously hope, that after the wedding he is going to keep his distance and give her the silent treatment. I want Swara to have a million flashbacks of his miserable and stressed face and of every time he said he loved her but didn't want to marry her like this.
I want her to feel day in day out that he's far more miserable than anyone else because of the wedding and that he is not interested in pursuing a relationship with her or expecting her to be a wife in these circumstances. I want her to remember that this wedding went through because she wanted it, and he was reluctant the whole time...
Swara needs to do all the hard work to win him back. She has to reclaim that friendship first, which is the foundation of the relationship, and then go to the next step. I want her to announce her feelings to him in front of the world, in all her senses, to mirror what he did. """
Swara needs to do all the hard work to win him back. She has to reclaim that friendship first, which is the foundation of the relationship, and then go to the next step. I want her to announce her feelings to him in front of the world, in all her senses, to mirror what he did. """
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