He could hear her pattering around the room as he shaved, and he impatiently looked at the dressing table in the mirror, waiting for her to walk over. He heard the light cough as she wrapped her sari around herself, the closet door hiding her figure as the sari slowly disappeared into her hands.
She walked out from behind the closet, sneaking a glance at him as she unraveled her hair from the towel, standing in front of the dresser. Her heart raced when her eyes met warm caramel in the mirror, his hands slowing on the knife as awareness crept in.
She knew she should look away, but she didn't want to, unable to tear her eyes away. He leaned down towards the tap, forced to look away as he focused his attention on washing the knife. He looked back up as he twisted it off, meeting her gaze yet again.
She shook her head, a small smile creeping up her face as she placed the bindi between her eyebrows. Her lip was pulled between her teeth, and he watched mesmerized as she pinched the red powder between her fingers, placing it in her parting.
She was about to turn around when a hand stopped her, warm against her forearm. She looked up at him questioningly, starting slightly as the back of his hand touched her forehead. She waited patiently as his hand stayed there, checking for a temperature.
Warmth spread through her, like drinking chai on a cold December day in Delhi. Her eyes rested on his face, taking in the deep crease between his eyebrows, the tension that lingered in his eyes as his hand turned so his palm lay flat against her skin.
She knew. The knowledge gave her satisfaction, making her heart swell until the feeling began to slowly seep out of her. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and inhale his scent, sleep nestled in his grasp as she had when she was nearly delirious.
Her body wanted her to admit how much comfort feeling his planes fit into hers against her back gave her, the way it made her body feel leaden and safe. She had nearly said it, the words pressing against the edge of her tongue as they threatened to overflow, held back by the confines of the world outside of their space.
He dropped his hand, nodding curtly in satisfaction. She immediately felt the lack of heat and shivered, earning a worried glance from him. He reached forward again and she shook her head, unable to keep the wry smile off her face.
He frowned, fixing her with a disapproving look.
"Khushi, you're still shivering. You don't have a fever, but-"
If only he knew why she was shivering.
She thought in unholy amusement. The crease reappeared between his brows, and he crossed his arms over his chest, narrowing his eyes.
"What?"
He snapped, glaring at her. He was annoyed by the sudden glint in her eyes that seemed to be laughing... at him. She fought the urge to roll her eyes, meeting his gaze innocently.
"Am I not allowed to laugh now either? I'm already banned from cooking, folding clothes, setting the table, going out to class, reading, writing, walking, breathing..."
The frown disappeared as she trailed off, catching the glint in her eyes. She could see him fighting the slight upturn of his lips, trying to keep a straight face as his jaw ticked in amusement.
"No. You aren't. Laughing will induce coughing, and I will not have you disturbing the peace of the early morning with that."
His words were serious, his face impassive. But she didn't miss the underlying grin in his voice. She nodded seriously, her eyes wide as her lips twitched, laughter bubbling up within her.
He looked at her, biting his inner cheek to keep himself in check. They stared at each other, each one determined not to be the first one to break, their breathing labored as they struggled to hold themselves together.
A snort spilled out of her and he simply couldn't keep it inside of him anymore. Deep throated laughter joined her giggles as they held their gazes, their shoulders shaking.
It had been so long, so long since they had felt so happy, so carefree. It wasn't a particularly funny moment, but they couldn't keep themselves from giving into the melting ice, allowing the warmth to break through.
She leaned into him as she laughed, bracing herself against his arm. His hand slipped around her waist, and she leaned into him further, looking up at him.
The laughter slowly faded, leaving them with smiles on their faces and the laughter ringing in the room. She could feel the warmth of his breath, his gaze dropping down to her lips. He drew his gaze back up, the molten caramel pulling her in until their lips touched. He slanted his lips across hers and gently pressed against the seams of hers, taking her lower lip between his.
His hand rested on her hip as she went up on her tiptoes, her hand brushing the hinge of his glasses. She sighed a little as they pulled away, remaining on her tiptoes for a just little longer. She leaned up again, pressing a lingering kiss to his lips, loathe to pull away.
She slowly put her heels to the ground, lowering her lashes as the pink swept over her cheeks. Arnav kept his gaze on her pink cheeks, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He vaguely heard the sounds of his family getting ready for the morning, and reluctantly glanced at the clock.
He knew she had to go downstairs to do the puja, but he didn't want her to go.
"I should go down and help Ma with the puja."
He nodded, but they didn't move. Their gazed remained on each other, a peaceful satisfaction settling over them. They unwittingly took a step forward, drawn by strings pulling them closer. He found his fingers reaching out to trail along the small curls that framed her face. She leaned into his touch with a contented sigh.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, forcing himself to break the spell.
He cleared his throat, speaking gruffly.
"You should go to the puja."
He watched her go, a strange longing pulling at his fingers as her figure disappeared around the corner, leaving him with the familiar scent of lavender.
*********
She quickly counted out a handful of cash, slipping it into her bag. She added the hastily scribbled list, glancing around the room to make sure she had gotten everything. She lifted her arm as a cough shook her, clearing her throat loudly as it faded away.
She swung the bag over her shoulder, checking the room one more time before she turned to walk out of the door. She slammed into a hard chest, and felt his hands grasp her forearms to steady her.
She winced as a wave of dizziness hit her, rubbing her forehead as she grasped his arm for support. She had forgotten in her haste to get out that she was still unwell, the illness still lingering behind.
"Tum theek ho?"
His gentle, husky voice caused her to look up, and she gave him a small smile, nodding. He studied her face for a moment, his gaze dropping down to the bag she clutched.
His eyes narrowed, and she swore mentally.
"Why do you have a bag?"
She heard the admonishment in his voice, recognizing her intent. She gritted her teeth, placing a painfully sweet smile on her face, realizing it would do no good to fight with him.
"Because I'm going out."
"You're still sick, and you are not going anywhere."
"I'm fine!"
She argued back, fighting against the pounding headache that had emerged. He cocked his head, silently calling her out on her lie. She huffed, looking away from her husband.
"Khushi, you're clearly still unwell. I can hear your coughing down the hall."
"I have been cooped up for so long. I want to go out, and I will go out."
She said sharply, irritated that he was trying to impose himself on her. She hadn't had the energy to argue back when she was sick, but she refused to take it now.
He regarded her quietly for a moment, and she shifted under his calculating gaze.
"Fine. But I will go with you."
Her mouth parted in surprise. She stared at him for a minute, opening her mouth further to protest before closing it. He didn't break her gaze, simply raising an eyebrow.
"Fine."
She acquiesced, and he nodded with a faint smile, following her out the door.
They walked in companionable silence, the streets quiet in the early morning. She preferred going out now, when there wasn't the noisy clanking of the occasional car, the air still heavy with early morning moisture.
She snuck a glance at him, her heart quickening in response to the profile of her husband. She recalled the way the nose would brush here when they kissed, the shadow of his lips lingering after all this time.
She looked away, warmth creeping up her cheeks. She wasn't sure how she felt by this unexpected intimacy, the walls she had carefully placed up vanishing in his presence.
He cares. He cares.
He didn't leave your side, Khush.
Anjali's words insistently made their way to the front of her mind. The sound of his pacing footsteps, the warmth of the back of his hand against his forehead, his weight pushing down the bed as he sat next to her for hours refused to leave her, imprinting themselves on her mind.
She glanced at him again, watching as he skillfully guided her through the streets, not even looking at the ground. She couldn't help the small smile, noting the way he took the little alleyways that only the locals knew.
How things had changed, she mused, recalling the way he had once carefully kept his feet exactly where she had. He had grimaced at the dust, his mouth twisting in annoyance.
But now he seemed to be the least bothered, snapping at anyone who got in his way as the locals did. She allowed him to take her through, unable to tear her gaze away from him as he navigated effortlessly.
She felt his hand curl around her elbow, pulling her sharply back, and she belatedly realized that she had been about to walk into a subji wala pushing his cart down the road.
"Dhyaan se."
He muttered, his fingers still gently pressing against the skin of her inner arm, his touch sending a spark of heat up her nerves.
He cared.
The powerful realization made her stop, staring at him with a mix of emotions she couldn't quite identify.
She knew, she knew, she knew.
A smile tugged at her lips. Her heart pushed against the constraints of her ribcage, squeezing through the cracks until it overflowed. She could not stop the overwhelming emotion she felt for him, pushing past all her barriers ruthlessly until they ceased to exist.
He turned back to look at her curiously, his brow furrowing. Her eyes had softened, an almost wistful smile on her face as she looked at him.
She shook her head, gesturing to the shop in front of them as she pushed open the door.
"Khushiji?"
She saw Happy standing behind the counter, his smile lighting up his face even behind the thick mustache. She flashed him a bright grin, smiling inwardly when Arnav stiffened beside her.
"Namaste, Happyji! How are you? It has been far too long. Do you have new books for me?"
He gave her a wide grin, reaching beneath the counter to pull out the collection he had saved just for her, reveling in the brilliant returned smile. He shot a cursory glance at the scowling man standing behind her, shaking his head at just how opposite the couple was from each other.
There was silence as Khushi shuffled through the books. He busied himself in finishing up his accounts, occasionally shooting a glance at her husband. He froze when he met the unforgiving caramel gaze, hastily turning back to his work.
He had heard much of Sakshi and Ashok's foreign son. He briefly wondered how two warm people could have a child that was so severe, with his sharp jawline and imposing posture.
The sound of turning pages filled the room, broken by her occasional laugh. He looked up, shocked by expression on Arnav's face. The stiffness was gone, his molten eyes resting on his wife. The corners of his lips had pulled up, the hard lines around his mouth softening as he watched her giggle.
"Happyji, I will take these four."
She handed him the books, fishing for the money through her bag. He shook his head, placing the books in her hand before she could take out the money.
"Nahi, Khushiji. Take it as a wedding present."
She opened her mouth to protest but he shook his head again, insistently pressing the books into her hands. He saw Arnav place a hand on her shoulder and she gave him a small smile, taking the books from him. He flashed her a smile, nodding at Arnav, who responded with a curt nod of his own.
"Thank you, Happyji."
She said earnestly as they left the shop, waving to him.
Arnav watched as she immediately opened the book, not even caring that she was in the middle of the street as she began to read. He rolled his eyes heavenwards, unable to keep the fond smile off of his face as her brow furrowed into that familiar expression, her eyes flying across the page.
"Khushi, at least wait until we get home."
She muttered noncommittally, already lost to the written word. He huffed, snatching the book from her hands as she whirled around, her eyes flashing in annoyance.
"I was reading!"
He tucked the book into the crook of his arm, ignoring her disgruntled expression.
"Later. After we get home, you may read as much as you want. Pay attention to the road so no subji wala runs you over again."
He said dryly, amused by her insulted gasp.
"I saw him! You just didn't give me enough time to respond."
"Really?"
He drawled, falling into step with her. She ignored him, annoyance hardening her mouth as they tilted downwards.
The creases quickly shifted, her eyes sparkling as they fell on the small stall by the roadside. He followed her gaze, inwardly groaning as he shook his head in the negative, avoiding her pleading gaze.
"Please, Arnavji? I haven't had it in so long!"
"Khushi, no, you just got well."
"But it's been so long, and..."
He cursed mentally, his heart already melting when he saw her expression. Her brilliant smile widened as she dragged him over to the stand, quickly placing the order for the food.
He took the pani puris from the seller, walking over to where his wife was standing, handing her a plate with a cup of steaming chai. She gave him a warm smile, popping it into her mouth, sighing in pleasure as the taste exploded over her tongue.
He took a swig of the chai, his mouth twisting in distaste at the sugary concoction. She saw him shift on his feet as he tried to distance himself from the other customers milling around, discomforted.
She hid her smile, amusement bubbling up inside of her as she caught his restrained wince.
Some things never changed, she mused. She glanced around, finding a ledge nearby and walking over. She used the edge of her pallu to brush it off, gesturing for him to sit down.
"Oh Pardesi, please sit. I cleaned it for you."
She said, with a cheeky smile on her face. An amused snort escaped him, and he sat down beside her, leaning against the ledge.
They sat in comfortable silence, broken only by the occasional crunching of the puris as she slipped them into her mouth. The heavy mist of the morning had lifted, leaving cool air to blow lightly on their faces. He looked over to see her licking her finger, placing it in her mouth and sucking lightly.
The heat pooled in his stomach, desire curling within him as her tongue slipped out to catch the last bits of masala. She let out a little sigh of satisfaction, bliss evident on her face as she leaned back. He quickly looked away, his voice rough as he spoke.
"Enjoying it?"
She hemmed, her eyes still closed as she let the cool air play with her hair. She placed the plate off to the side, the shadow of a smile on her face.
"You cannot get this in your England, can you?"
She asked lightly, the smile widening. He chuckled, nodding his agreement as he shifted to avoid the sun hitting him in the eyes.
"No, you can't. This... delicacy, is strictly Indian."
He said, emphasizing the delicacy far too much for it to be earnest. She rolled her eyes, looking over at him. Their gazes met, the air growing serious as they looked at each other.
"Why do you want to move back to England, Arnav?"
The question was out before she could stop it. He regarded her for a moment, debating whether or not to avoid the question. He didn't want yet another argument on the subject, not when their tense relationship had started to ease.
But there was such genuine curiosity in her eyes, that he couldn't keep himself from responding. He took a deep breath, looking away from her as he shielded his eyes from the early sun.
"Because it truly is better for us there, Khushi. They have better infrastructure. Papa would have better health care there, and the hospitals are efficient and clean. There is better government, and we wouldn't have to pay off the police officers to get work done. There are better schools, better jobs..."
He trailed off, sighing heavily. The conversation exhausted him, tired of fighting with her over it.
"But we are the minority there. Wouldn't they treat us as such?"
"They do, at least initially. But I worked hard and I earned their respect. I didn't bribe anyone for it. I worked for it, and I earned it and that satisfaction... they will give it to you. You just have to work for it."
She made a quiet sound, saying nothing more.
He looked over at her, surprised by the lack of argument. He was momentarily taken aback by the thoughtful consideration in her eyes. There was no sign of the flicker of irritation that always made itself known, replaced by a struggle to understand.
To compromise?
He felt as if the world had paused for a moment, allowing it to sink in.
Did she want to understand him? Why was she asking him this?
He wasn't sure. They had never discussed the issue without an argument, and here she was, discussing it as if they were talking of the weather. It was disconcertingly calm, her voice kept clear of the resentment and anger that had tainted their previous discussions.
He looked over at her again, the words on the tip of his tongue. He turned away, hesitant. He turned back to look at her, the words spilling from his lips.
"Why do you want to stay in India?"
He asked. He leaned back, taking a deep breath. The words seemed to ease him, and he stared ahead at the street in front of them. She turned to him with a small smile, the cheekiness tinged with something akin to sadness.
"Haven't you heard it enough?"
He held her gaze for a long moment, taking in the tilt of her head, the creases that lined the edges of her lips from the quirk of her smile.
He had heard it a million times.
But had he ever actually listened?
"I want to hear it again."
He saw the imperceptible widening of her eyes, the surprise that was reflected in them. She cleared her throat when he didn't break her gaze, silently urging her to go on.
"Because my family is here. Because my friends are here. Because this is my land, my people. There is no where else I can get freshly made jalebis, where I can walk down the street and smell the spices. There's no where that is so noisy and yet so... quiet at the same time. There are no people more passionate, more different and yet... so much holds us together."
She paused, a wistful smile on her face.
"Because it's my home, Arnav. Isn't that enough?"
She tilted her gaze up to meet his, her neck stretching to look at his shadowed face. The sun beat down upon them, a glowing halo that surrounded his head. The cool of the early morning had long since disappeared, the mist replaced by the dust kicked up by people.
His gaze was inscrutable as he looked down at her. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, the loud, rhythmic beat ringing in her ears. The world faded away, leaving just the two of them.
She wanted him to understand her.
Her hands felt clammy with anticipation, the silence weighing upon them as he looked at her.
She wanted... no, she needed him to understand.
She didn't know what she would do if he didn't. The resignation was unimaginable, and she didn't want to feel it. She didn't need him to agree with her.
She just needed him to agree to look through her eyes for one moment, just to see what she saw. Her heart seemed to squeeze with every beat, a tense, rapid pace as she looked into his unreadable face.
But then, he smiled, looking down at her.
"Yes, it is enough."
He said softly, reaching out to brush a piece of hair behind her ear. The world seemed to freeze for a moment, her heart slowly unknotting itself as the hard lines around his mouth softened, leaving her breathless.
He slowly dropped his hand, his fingers dragging against her cheeks as the world faded back into existence. They turned to face the road, the centimeters between them seeming to disappear with every passing second.
She snuck a glance at him, only to meet his gaze. She averted her eyes, a delicate pink filling her cheeks, a shy smile appearing on her lips. She could see him smiling out of his peripheral vision, the corners of his eyes crinkling.
He understood, she thought, a bubble of happiness rising up inside of her. She bit the inside of her cheek but failed to keep her smile in, her lips widening of their own will.
She understood, he thought, watching the smile break out across her face. Satisfaction settled in his heart, and he turned back to look at the road.
*********
Note: And that's where I'll leave you for today! I hope you liked it- please let me know what you thought through a like or a comment. I do love to hear what you think!
For clarification- neither Khushi nor Arnav know about NK yet.
As always, please follow @ipkchotidesi or PM me your email for update notifications.
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Love always,
Choti.
Edited by chotidesi - 9 years ago
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