Posted:
I am so sick of soaps creating flawed, messed up heros and then dumping a reluctant heroine into their lives, with the instructions to "fix" him! As if tying a mangalsutra around a woman's neck gives her magic powers to change a man from the inside out! Why must the man be so broken he is basically un-marriagable? Marriage is never shown for the real reason it exists---to find a partner, a fellow being to go through life with. Its never entered into with seriousness, or even with the woman's consent.
Why? Aren't soaps escapism? Then whats with the horrible portrayal of marriage? How can we say Indian soaps or even this serial glorifies romance or shows tradition if the shows insist on making marriage, highest form of that romance, a burden, or a trap?
The hero's temper, his hatred---a woman is not a wife, she is a nurse, or a punching bag, or a victim who will take and take and take. Its her "kismet." And we, the audience, we cheer when the poor thing gets a roll on the bed or a grab of the arm because hey, the hero is "falling" in love with the victim who he's trapped.
I know this is blasphemy and I am going against the romantic idea of the love of a good woman fixing a broken man, but enough, already!
Here is my take on the situation---Rudra's PARENTS failed him. Unlike ASR, from the show that must not be named, the Major's parents are both alive. They didn't kill themselves, leaving the kids to cruel relatives. Rudra's parents are educated, they are relatively wealthy, they are loving parents in flashbacks. The Thakurain, or whoever the mysterious birthday-girl/runaway is --she is not far away, since she chats on the phone with her spineless devar often. Disher literally goes with Rudra everywhere.
For fifteen years, these two have had the responsibility of a son. Dilsher at least had the sense to remove Rudra from Kakisa's house early on. From what we have seen of Dilsher, he is not a fool, and he does love his Rudra Dev, in his sarcastic way. He is hardly a stupid drunkard who is a monster, as we first thought he might be. And if the mom is the Thakurain, she is a woman very capable of love, she has practically brought up Paro.
And they BOTH failed Rudra.
That Rudra is damaged, vicious, an animal---all of this is not Paro's problem, OR for that matter, Laila's. That is Dilsher's, and the Thakurian/mother's problem. They dropped the ball. For once, I would have liked to see Rudra fighting his instincts and learning to leave his childhood inside that box with the doll. To come to a realization that his father, who has been wrong about so much, is also wrong about this. I don't want him, the "hero", to trap Paro into marriage, when she literally has nowhere else to go. I don't like him doing this knowing Paro respects marriage and that he is incapable of that respect.
Today we found out Rudra consciously knows he is damaged, and that his dad did something wrong. Then why cant he, a warrior, fight THIS as well? Why cant the story be about him fixing himself, and Paro being the inspiration for that, as opposed to the fixer?
Why is Dilsher even demanding that his lava filled son marry anyone, anyway? He created the Jallad. He takes pride in the hatred and the bile when it suits him. He laughs with glee when his son stands up to his enemy. In flashbacks, we saw him emotionally torture Rudra. But how do you do that to a son for 15 years and then think he is capable of any human bonds?
Dilsher should not be surprised that the son who calls him "Ranawat" and not Babu-ji is not ready for relationships. So how is Rudra marrying going to be anything but hell for the girl, and for Rudra too? How is Paro the solution to a problem that Dilsher has created? WHY should she be?
Soap walo parents--deal with your kids. Create healthy human beings. Do what Paro's family did--give even the orphans and the unfortunate ones a stable happy home. Don't ask or compel or blackmail a nice, kind girl who did nothing to harm you to come in and marry the hell spawn you have created. Don't stand by in group-photo setups while the woman who has been forced into this "marriage" gets harmed again and again through your monstrous son in the name of "passionate love."
Why? Aren't soaps escapism? Then whats with the horrible portrayal of marriage? How can we say Indian soaps or even this serial glorifies romance or shows tradition if the shows insist on making marriage, highest form of that romance, a burden, or a trap?
The hero's temper, his hatred---a woman is not a wife, she is a nurse, or a punching bag, or a victim who will take and take and take. Its her "kismet." And we, the audience, we cheer when the poor thing gets a roll on the bed or a grab of the arm because hey, the hero is "falling" in love with the victim who he's trapped.
I know this is blasphemy and I am going against the romantic idea of the love of a good woman fixing a broken man, but enough, already!
Here is my take on the situation---Rudra's PARENTS failed him. Unlike ASR, from the show that must not be named, the Major's parents are both alive. They didn't kill themselves, leaving the kids to cruel relatives. Rudra's parents are educated, they are relatively wealthy, they are loving parents in flashbacks. The Thakurain, or whoever the mysterious birthday-girl/runaway is --she is not far away, since she chats on the phone with her spineless devar often. Disher literally goes with Rudra everywhere.
For fifteen years, these two have had the responsibility of a son. Dilsher at least had the sense to remove Rudra from Kakisa's house early on. From what we have seen of Dilsher, he is not a fool, and he does love his Rudra Dev, in his sarcastic way. He is hardly a stupid drunkard who is a monster, as we first thought he might be. And if the mom is the Thakurain, she is a woman very capable of love, she has practically brought up Paro.
And they BOTH failed Rudra.
That Rudra is damaged, vicious, an animal---all of this is not Paro's problem, OR for that matter, Laila's. That is Dilsher's, and the Thakurian/mother's problem. They dropped the ball. For once, I would have liked to see Rudra fighting his instincts and learning to leave his childhood inside that box with the doll. To come to a realization that his father, who has been wrong about so much, is also wrong about this. I don't want him, the "hero", to trap Paro into marriage, when she literally has nowhere else to go. I don't like him doing this knowing Paro respects marriage and that he is incapable of that respect.
Today we found out Rudra consciously knows he is damaged, and that his dad did something wrong. Then why cant he, a warrior, fight THIS as well? Why cant the story be about him fixing himself, and Paro being the inspiration for that, as opposed to the fixer?
Why is Dilsher even demanding that his lava filled son marry anyone, anyway? He created the Jallad. He takes pride in the hatred and the bile when it suits him. He laughs with glee when his son stands up to his enemy. In flashbacks, we saw him emotionally torture Rudra. But how do you do that to a son for 15 years and then think he is capable of any human bonds?
Dilsher should not be surprised that the son who calls him "Ranawat" and not Babu-ji is not ready for relationships. So how is Rudra marrying going to be anything but hell for the girl, and for Rudra too? How is Paro the solution to a problem that Dilsher has created? WHY should she be?
Soap walo parents--deal with your kids. Create healthy human beings. Do what Paro's family did--give even the orphans and the unfortunate ones a stable happy home. Don't ask or compel or blackmail a nice, kind girl who did nothing to harm you to come in and marry the hell spawn you have created. Don't stand by in group-photo setups while the woman who has been forced into this "marriage" gets harmed again and again through your monstrous son in the name of "passionate love."
Don't create stereotypes that insult marriage and don't celebrate when your heroine is made a mockery, because she is a woman, and her "role" is to suffer.
Cricket
Kumkum Bhagya
Tum Se Tum Tak
Sampoorna
