Hello Prema Akka....🤗 My essay is here!!!!
As a viewer, I used to love Suman initially.... The only pre leap episodes I ever watched were the Gaura wedding sequence, and a few of the introduction episodes in which you clearly see Suman's dislike for Dhara... I did initially feel that she was extremely regressive, but watching post leap episodes after that, I had begun to see her as a gray character.
And because I'm not someone who needs characters to be black and white, I enjoyed her. She had a kind of old school feminist feel to her, someone who mostly (when not blinded by emotion), saw every side's mistakes what with her age and experiences in life, but still was too old school to actually go against the expectations of a patriarchal society. She did support her DILs occassionally in the pre Yatra Kaand days. I loved her in particular right after the Yatra Kaand.
And then things went downhill. On a whole other level. Moral ambiguity I understood and accepted. But whatever happened to Suman Pandya after that falls on the makers. I will be completely honest when I say that the last time I watched a complete scene of hers was when she first blamed Raavi for not understanding that the man she was about to get married to did not love her (right after Dhara and Raavi's kitchen conversation post Raavi's return from her Maasi's place).
What she has done by bringing in Disha is a whole other level of murder of the character. In my head, I always give Mami free passes for being a good mother figure to Raavi. She might have her own agendas that she uses her daughter for, but she does see Raavi's emotions. She does care for her feelings even when she disagrees.
She knows Raavi doesn't want to move on from Shiva and her marriage to him. She says he does not want you, why do you wait for him? She's brought in boys and tried to talk Raavi into agreeing for a marriage, yes. But she hasn't laid down the law and said you have no choice but to accept. A morally ambiguous character, gray not black. Dislikes at times, but acceptable.
I might have looked past Suman as a bad MIL if they had given her a good redemption instead of flipping her at the last moment (highly unlikely, but as you know, DREAMER...), but a bad mother? A bad mother will never be able to accept her DIL, because a woman who dies not care for her own child's choices has no motive to accept his wife. Even in real life, of what I've observed, MIL's who have issues with their sons end up accepting them at least initially for the sake of their sons. She has failed at this step itself.
Her disregarding Shiva's care and concern for Raavi as something that he will be able to move in with only if she provided him with the right partner? It's laughable. She is not willing him to give him space. She is not willing to put her child's mental well being and peace of mind above the perceived insults her DIL has thrown his way. She is offended on behalf of a man who doesn't consider those offences as such.
Suman, first and foremost, stops needing to think as the head, the sethani of the family, and start thinking solely as a mother. There is no other way her character is ever getting redeemed.
PS Sometimes I wonder what Krittika mam must be thinking... She seemed very happy with the reverse psychology plot, but what with the writers doing a paltu with her character, how must she feel playing such a regressive role? I hope Suman is somehow redeemed solely so that I may enjoy her stellar acting in peace once again. ❤️
