The love we lost : a shivi ff chapter 9 updated page 17, complete - Page 10

It’s literally one of my favourite stories on PS forum now 😭

So sweet, so simple yet so impactful ❤️

Shiva and Raavi are acting so maturely and the story progression is sooo smooth 💙

It’s truly a gem!💎

Just caught up on the last 2 updates and Darshi🤗!!! This story gives me so much sukoon, I swear....❤️ Shiva wants to work on their relationship again, but Raavi doesn't want to... And I think the way Raavi's relationship with the family has evolved is something very true to real life and the Pandya parivaar as well...

I'm a sucker for guys who cook for their girls, so I have hearts in my eyes right now!!! Keep the updates coming phastam phast!!!!

Originally posted by: StarLord_Owen

It’s literally one of my favourite stories on PS forum now 😭

So sweet, so simple yet so impactful ❤️

Shiva and Raavi are acting so maturely and the story progression is sooo smooth 💙

It’s truly a gem!💎

Thank you so much❤❤

Shiva Raavi are so close to my heart they just need time, space and communication and they will handle everything themselves.. No need for toxic manipulation like Suman doing... This story is my solace too

Originally posted by: Pottermeow

Just caught up on the last 2 updates and Darshi🤗!!! This story gives me so much sukoon, I swear....❤️ Shiva wants to work on their relationship again, but Raavi doesn't want to... And I think the way Raavi's relationship with the family has evolved is something very true to real life and the Pandya parivaar as well...

I'm a sucker for guys who cook for their girls, so I have hearts in my eyes right now!!! Keep the updates coming phastam phast!!!!

There are so many ifs and buts in Raavi's mind and she is she is right in her place.. She was determined she will not go at that path again and now she's having second thoughts.. It's difficult for her but she's accepting towards the comfort his company brings and his efforts.. She still doesn't know the real reason why he wanted divorce... Let's see what happens 😊

Originally posted by: maanmeet1

how did I miss this masterpiece 😭

but I am glad I caught up with all the updates at one time and loved it would be an understatement

I would love to see this happening in real

they could go separate ways and introspect....do something with their lives ....instead of prioritizing other's whims and fancies ....think about ownself too....

meet at some later stage and start afresh if they want...respect and understand each other

Thank you so much❤

Read all the parts in one time. What a lovely and interesting story. Looking forward to the next chapter 💜💜

i just loved these two period.

Update soon. Eagerly waiting for it.

Read this story in one go🥰

Loved it alot❤️ I loved how Shiva and Raavi evolved into this amazing persons....loving this🤗

Pls update soon

Chapter 8

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"To, tune aage ka kya socha hai.. Matlab tu kya ye project khatam hone ke baad chali jayegi?"

Shiva asked Raavi... He was going on again and again over this question in his mind, every time he wanted to ask her this question, he chickened out fearing what her answer would be. He knew he didn't have any right to hope, but still he knew his heart will break to the point of no repair this time.

"Kyu? Tu achanak ye sab kyu pooch raha hai? "

He shrugged. He didn't know what to tell her.. How much he can tell her. So he decided to go with subtle approach.

"Aise hi, waise bhi ab hum dost hai,aur dosti ke naate ye pooch sakta hu na?" he said.

"Hmmm.. Wo to hai... Sach batau, pata nhi kyu jaane ka man nhi kar raha wapas, par jana to padega hi, waha sab kuch h mera, mera career, meri nayi zindagi, yaha kya hai... Jo itne saalo mein achieve kiya hai, use kaise jaane du? "

Shiva was silent for a moment. But today he was feeling extra bold, he didn't know why but today felt like now or never.

"Kyu? Kaam to tu yahan bhi kar sakti hai... Tu itni achhi designer h, itne contacts h tere, Tu online marketing kar sakti hai aur tu meri factory ke saath mil ke business bhi shuru kar sakti hai, new designer brand bhi khol sakti hai... Tu sochna chahe to bahut kuch h, aur tu rukna chahe to bhi... Kya sach me yahan kuch nhi hai ab rukne ke liye?"

Raavi was surprised & taken aback by this. He clearly thought about it a lot & she was a bit afraid of his last question. What can she tell him? Does she have any answer? She stalked over to him and leaned back on the counter beside him. "Shayad tu sahi bol raha hai, mene is baare me zyada nhi socha, ya shayad mere paas koi reason nhi tha, pan tune kaafi socha hai, aisa kyu?"

He was silent & then said, "Mene jis sawal ka zawaab poocha, uska zawaab nhi diya tune, kyunki itna to me jaanta hu... Aisa nhi hai ki tune socha nhi."

Raavi smiled. "Apni khaali duniya ko sach maan kar, ummede saja kar aage badhne ka nateeza dekh chuki hu... Yahi seekha h ki life me decision soch samajh ke aur practicality ke saath hi lene chahiye, warna girne par zameen bhi nhi milti."

"Shayad." He paused. "Shayad, doosra option itna bhi impractical nhi hai, Tu soch sakti hai, nhi?" He asked her hopefully.

She was silent for a moment & it felt like forever. "Shayad" She said, voice so low still clearly audible.

It took all his will power to not give a sigh of relief in front of her.

After glancing at the clock, Raavi stood up to close the office. Something was changed, neither of them wanted the night to end.

She was distracted from her thoughts when Shiva took a deep breath. "Me apne parivaar se bahut pyar karta hu aur wo sab bhi, pan aajtak me unse kabhi baat nhi kar paya dil ki, is tarah baith ke sukoon se, tere saath rehna achha lagta hai mujhe."

She didn't know what to say, so settled for "Thank you."

"Hmmm." She had the sense he couldn't look at her. He'd always wanted everyone to see him a particular way, and this part of vulnerability was most likely challenging. "Bachpan me aisa lagta tha ki me un sabke pyaar ke layak hi nhi hu."

Raavi was confused. "Tu aisa kaise soch sakta hai Shiva.. Sab tujhse itna to pyaar karte hai, jaan h Tu sabki."

"Ha" he confirmed, "lekin jab sab mujhe jangli, gawaar bulate the aur ghar ke sab log chup rehte the to kahi na kahi yahi lagta tha ki ye sab sach hai, me kisi layak nhi hu."

"Sab mujhse bahut pyar karte hai" Shiva still wasn't looking at her. "Pan me kabhi kisi se ye baat share nhi kar paya, aur shayad ghar me koi ye baat samjh bhi nhi paya."

"I'm sorry Shiva" She paused, but said it anyway. "Pan tune mujhe ye sab kabhi bataaya kyu nhi?"

"Kya farak pad jata?"

Raavi couldn't imagine a world where her family, even her Mami made her feel like that, didn't accept her for who she was, despite not understanding it completely. "Tu bahut strong hai Shiva."

"Pata nhi."

"Tu hai," she insisted, turning in her seat towards him. His hands were deep in the pockets. "Aaj tak jis kisi ne bhi tujhe ye feel karwaya ki tu kisi se kam hai, wo sab jhooth hai, aur teri galti bilkul bhi nhi hai, aur me jaanti hu, jaane anjaane me bhi in sab me shamil hu, I'm really really sorry Shiva."

Shiva met her gaze and then, it was as though she couldn't look away. His eyes seemed rather wet, but then he blinked and it was gone and he was much closer than she'd realized, reaching for her jaw. Something wedged itself deep in her throat because she didn't know why she did but she knew that look.

He was going to kiss her.

Raavi nearly fell off the stool, fumbling for her footing as she backed away.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly, anxiously, hands held up as he stood. "—sorry."

"Me ye nhi kar sakti." Rose was deeply regretting the playful teasing, the touch of flirting that had gone on for the past month, especially the last few days. "Nhi."

"I'm sorry."

"Ye sab kya hai Shiva" she demanded. "Jo kuch bhi humare beech hua, uske baad bhi, ye sab--- Tu kya kar raha hai yaha"

He swallowed and stuffed his hands in his pockets again. "Mujhe bolne ki jarurat nhi hai, tu bhi jaanti hai me kya kar raha hu yaha."

"Nhi."

"Nhi kya?"

"Tu hamesha aisa karta hai" she explained. "Tu phir se mera dil todega aur—"

"Ye sach nhi hai," he protested weakly.

"—nhi." She swallowed. "Ab tooti to me bikhar jaungi Shiva."

His Adam's apple bobbed up and down, arms reaching left and right. "Tu jaanti hai. Jhooth mat bol tu nhi jaanti ki me tujhse pyaar—"

Raavi had run towards him and put a hand over his mouth. The irony of it all was creeping up her neck in hot humiliation; for all that he held back, maybe she'd never been ready to hear it.

"Nhi" she said breathlessly.

When she dropped her hand, he cleared his throat. "Me tujhe divorce nhi dena chahta tha."

"Bas kar Shiva."

Shiva couldn't speak for a moment.

"Tu kyu nhi samajhti Raavi," he said, voice strained. "Me tujhe divorce nhi dena chahta tha, andar hi andar mar raha tha me, ek loser jaisa feel karta tha—"

"Tu loser nhi hai!" she erupted. "Sab tujhe pyar karte hai Shiva, ghar ko, pariwar ko, khud ko tune akele dam pe bachaya hai. Tu chahta to ye sab mujhe bata sakta tha, par nhi, tune to baat karna bhi jaroori nhi samjha, har faisla, dono ke behalf pe khud hi le liya... "

He was shaking his head. "Me tujhe batana chahta tha.. Sach me, pan phir mene tujhe tere doston ke saath dekha, kitni khush thi tu unke saath, jo mere saath tu kabhi bhi nhi thi... "

"Me janta hu mene galat kiya," Shiva persisted. "Mujhe hum dono ke behalf pe decision lene ka koi adhikaar nhi hai... Pan I promise, ab aage se aisa kuch nhi hoga."

"Nhi kar sakti me tujhpe vishwas."

"Kyu nhi?" he demanded, running a hand through his hair. "Tu itne din me itna hi vishwas kar payi.. Kya in dino Jo kuch bhi tha humare beech wo koi mayne nhi rakhta.. "

Raavi tried to take a deep breath. "Par me puraani saari yaade, wo dard, sab kaise bhula du, mujhmein ab itni himmat nhi hai, tu phir se wahi kiya to, ghar me Ma ne ya dhara di ne humare liye na bol diya to tu to peeche ho jayega, chhod dega mujhe, ya phir mujhse baat kiye bina khud hi decision le lega.. Me kaise vishwas karu.. "

Shiva looked as though he'd been slapped. It was like the word floated between them, simply and overbearing all at once:

Coward.

"Aur tera kya?" he questioned suddenly, defensively. "Compromise, compromise, compromise bas yahi to word use karti thi tu hamesha.. "

"Ab tu mere upar mat aa Shiva," she retorted, stung.

He ignored her. "Kyu, tu kaun sa mujhe pasand karti thi Jo dil tod diya mene tera, compromise hi to tha humara rishta tere liye?"

"Bas kar—"

"Nhi bol—"

"—tu apni baat kar!"

"—tujhse Pyar karne laga tha me"

"Me bhi!"

It was suddenly so quiet, it was ringing in her ears. Shiva was looking at her like he didn't believe her or didn't hear her, and stepped towards her as though it would help.

"Kya?" His voice sounded as though it were squeezed out of nowhere, like he wasn't breathing.

She swallowed but kept her eyes steady to his, closing the space between them until they were nose-to-nose. "Me bhi pyar karne lagi thi tujhse & maybe I never stopped."

And then he was kissing her and she didn't know how it happened. It wasn't altogether unexpected, if she was honest. But she was definitely kissing him back, the longing hanging from every kiss, every grasp, every miniscule of space they couldn't spare.

In the muddled mess of it all, she realized she was done running.

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So I updated finally. Sorry for long long delay. Only one more chapter to go. Hopefully I'll update soon. Thanks all.