Exploring the bond,within FF *part 11* COMPLETEDpage 19 - Page 2

Hey guys, I'm back, unsure of how is this going to be and whether y'all going to like it or not...but I hope you guys like it!!!

PART-1

~LEFT & RETURNED~

As she entered her masi's house which was probably the only place which she could say is her home, but she had left the pandya niwas now; the place which was truly a "Home" for her since her childhood, the place which was 'ghar' not just merely a 'makaan', a home of her dreams, the only admiration she had was to become bahu of Pandyas and handle the 'Pandya Niwas', just as she had seen her Dhara di, but now....was she still her Dhara di?Or was it just her husband's bhabhi talking...but leaving Pandya Niwas felt like someone crushed her dreams under their rage...and why did Shiva do this, he considered her as his enemy but he never disrespected or doubted her like that, and that too publicly he has not done that...and not just to her but anyone,was that her Shiva or someone else...she was not able to believe that he can speak words like this and that too for...everything was running errands in her mind, her thoughts got entangled in a way, she felt herself fell down the cliff and make all this mess to end, she was exhausted not.

But then, masi started the series of questionnarie which she felt as if she had been pushed underneath the weight of all questions...she wondered if anyone geniunely considered her as their own, each and everyone who she considered as her own and beloved, was she also the same for them or was it a different story?Though she refused on answering, she felt a part of her just giving a flashback of events of her with him, all of it...she was missing him...she denied to talk to anyone but to herself?What justification she was to give her ownself?He made her like he was, he made her question herself...as she went to Jharukha, she saw the moon...she remembered how she would admire moon pre-wedding just like the bollywood films in a dramatic way and would smile looking upto the beautiful full moon.She let out a dry chuckle out of irony, though she didn't say a word but her eyes...her eyes were having a deep driven conversation with the moon, as if her heart was asking moon the answers of some questions even she wasn't aware of.He made her question herself...all her life she has not been able to understand her Shiva, probably the only person who claimed to hate her but was the same person who had stood up to save her everytime she was in danger...Shiva really made her question on her understandability,her generousness and 'the slap'.Probably she was more guilty of hitting him because this was not her, she would never hit anyone but she hitted him, was this her or someone else, she didn't knew.

As she glanced at the jharukha of Pandya niwas, she saw him entering, probably he was in the same restless dilemma she was going through, she thought...she didn't say a word but her eyes started to express, the tears won't stop...they started flowing...as she made a blurred eye contact with him, she was able to feel his moist eyes, he was having a havoc going inside him, she could read his face but as she did not wanted him to see herself she turned; but her legs denied to move ahead...

R:"Agar samajh jao to ek pal kaafi hai, varna puri zindagi nikal jaati hai...aur mai tujhe kabhi samaj hi nahi paayi Shiva...kyu?"

Shiva really made her question her own self, her heart knew how important he has become but it was still away from the roads of realisations...she was tumbling herself, trying to sleep but everytime she shut her eyes and tried to force her to sleep the memories bareged in, her memories with him...was she missing him?she did not know...but then if not, why was she getting so restless to feel his warmth...she did not know.It was true that she had accepted him whole heartedly, her heart did know that she has fallen for him, even she likes him but now, she and her mind was cautious enough not to express till the confirmity and surety she would get, she had killed a Raavi then, and she didnot wanted to kill this Raavi, the Raavi who felt protected around him and he was hers, her Shiva but on which roads they've come which are not able to corss?...she questioned her self.

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As he returned home, which today was giving him a sudden strange glare, he felt alone,strange,detached to all walls of his home, but was it really his home where everyone had been reluctant about how was wrong and how can he do this...but did anyone ask him 'why' he did this,no...no one did.He knew what he had done was wrong, very wrong but how...how on earth can he compromise when it had came to happiness of Raavi, his Raavi.Though he had hated him all his life but then he started caring for her, he started liking for her...and though his heart was not ready he had done all this out of a blast of emotions suppressed in him; all his life he didn't cared what world thought of him but now it was affecting him, why?Because of her.As he got taunted from Rishita as well as almost everyone he left the room and came upstairs to atleast get some fresh air, it had been a long day...filled with uncertainties of happenings, he would have never even thought about, he didn't cared about being slapped by her because she was right then, he knew he had done immense wrong thing and he, did not deserve her.Then he saw her through the jharukha, standing and looking at how pity he had been after she left.

He told her, "Agar mai tujhse yeh bolu ke mai tujhe pasand karta hu kya fir bhi tu chodke chali jaayegi?"

R:" Ese thodina hota hai Shiva, compatibility naam ki bhi chiz hoti hai" (squealing in joy with a huge smile)

His eyes were tearful but as he looked again, she had disappeared, it was not her...it was her mirage.He was hallucinating about her,why...he questioned himself.It was Raavi of his head, who just spoke as a mirage...he left a sigh with a gust of grimace and heavy heart, pain clearly visible in his eyes.He wished she would understand her, like she did all her life...somewhere he knew that Raavi is not just someone, eventually she is a part of his, the only person on whom he would let out his anger; the only person with whom he was unfiltered yet comfortable.Probably she was the only person he opened to and today it was about him, even he had question for himself, that does't he know Raavi and how she is..but then he had been so emotionally filled up,he resfused interaction and it all bursted.She was right when she said, "Itna gussa karega toh apni hi aag mein bhasm hojayega"...how well did she knew him, like she was his mirror but then how did mirror object on a person.

Raavi had made him question himself, his own self and even if he wanted to share, with whom would he be able to share...the idea of sending her divorce papers, he felt something bursting out in him, he shouted on top of his voice...:"Aey mami ki behen ki beti....nahi todna mujhe rishta....samajh rahi hai tu?sun rahi hai????"But she wasn't there to sit and talk, even he knew that she was putting efforts but he can ever make her happiness compromise due to him.

As he looked upto the beautiful moon, his eyes fell on the jharukha where she was standing and thoroughly studying moon, he saw her, few hourse seemed like seconds now and as she turned, he saw a tear escaping her eyes, he knew she was in pain and she,him, he himself was the reason who had done all this to her and now letting free from all the the tangled threads of their lives.

I hope you enjoy reading this....Honest reviews appreciated.

Very well written and those scenes written with diff view points 😂

💕Heart-breakingly beautiful 💕

Great start! I enjoyed reading both ShiVi's perspective for the same scenes.. it was beautiful! ❤️

Januddiiiii❤️

This is so so pyara....also this time it's secret for me tooo....excited to read next part...

Jldi upload karo....🤣

Originally posted by: Iktara22

Hey guys, I'm back, unsure of how is this going to be and whether y'all going to like it or not...but I hope you guys like it!!!

PART-1

She had killed a Raavi then, and she didnot wanted to kill this Raavi, the Raavi who felt protected around him and he was hers, her Shiva but on which roads they've come which are not able to corss?...she questioned her self.

____

She was right when she said, "Itna gussa karega toh apni hi aag mein bhasm hojayega"...how well did she knew him, like she was his mirror but then how did mirror object on a person.

Raavi had made him question himself, his own self and even if he wanted to share, with whom would he be able to

Thank you for writing about them in such vividi detail ... it like I was watching it on television .. sans DoraShita ka BS.

I LOVE how this Shiva is the same as canon.. but this Shiva gives himself some leeway .. some room to think .. unlike Canon Shiva who overwhelms himself with all that he feels for Raavi ... love, affection, guilt, regret etc etc. You Shiva gives me hope.

As for your take on Raavi ... again .. the retrospection .. same as show Raavi but your Raavi's chain of thoughts is moving in thr right direction.. which means she will eventually figure out why Shiva did what he did ... unlike Show Raavi .. uss bechari ko toh kuch pata honay bhi nahin degi Shilpa 😒

Please write more .. your description of the night time scene has all my heart ❤.

Originally posted by: Mountains_Lakes

Very well written and those scenes written with diff view points 😂

I had too yaar

Originally posted by: S_Verma

Januddiiiii❤️

This is so so pyara....also this time it's secret for me tooo....excited to read next part...

Jldi upload karo....🤣

Haha its a secret because it is a secret for myself too lmaoo

Originally posted by: barkhaa_tpm

Thank you for writing about them in such vividi detail ... it like I was watching it on television .. sans DoraShita ka BS.

I LOVE how this Shiva is the same as canon.. but this Shiva gives himself some leeway .. some room to think .. unlike Canon Shiva who overwhelms himself with all that he feels for Raavi ... love, affection, guilt, regret etc etc. You Shiva gives me hope.

As for your take on Raavi ... again .. the retrospection .. same as show Raavi but your Raavi's chain of thoughts is moving in thr right direction.. which means she will eventually figure out why Shiva did what he did ... unlike Show Raavi .. uss bechari ko toh kuch pata honay bhi nahin degi Shilpa 😒

Please write more .. your description of the night time scene has all my heart ❤.

Barkhaaa your review on my ffs is what i wait always,always...and I always will;it gives me hope and a different kind of encouragement to write more and more....

Hey guys...so ya, Im back and also apologies for the mishaps i made in last part,so sorry...also, I hope you guys like this part...

PART 2

~Breaking the ties, on paper or of hearts?~

She had been delivered the divorce papers to her place, now she stood there emotionless,her ever expressive face portrayed utter numbess, that even darkness would've recognised easily.She had so many things going on in her head that she was not able to listen her masima screaming and she being dragged by her to the pandya niwas; her masima screamed as she looked around the whole pandya niwas with her rage-filled eyes.On the other hand, she was so engrossed and her mind was so blocked she was neither being able to think, nor accept these prima facie facts occuring in her life.She was not in state to talk to anyone and apparently not even able to question anyone because before questioning anyone she had a millions of questions for herself to deal with...and amidst of all the chaos, she felt someone entering through even without any voice, she turned her neck just to see him entering in..but today, it was different...it was not her Shiva today, was he?No, he wasn't but the question which arose in her wrenched heart was that was he even Shiva?...She did not knew, she had no answer to this question...but there he stood, and her eyes caught his eyes and stuck there, as if her eyes were questioning him and the way he was looking, his eyes had no answer to them.

After all things were said and heard, all facts argued and answered, out of furiousness and anger boiling up on her she angrily signed the papers and left hurriedly and before anyone could have chased she had ran away, ran away from the whole family, from the peer pressure of society, from herself....but questions which she had and the self-doubts he had given birth to in herself were behind her, wherever she went; they followed...was she running in search of answers?She didn't even had an answer to this question.As she kept running through the lanes of Somnath she remembered him holding her pinky promise finger and dragging her to the store, the mirchi memory- of them crashung and her doing drama so that he'd be compelled to drop her to godbharai rasam, and many more like that.As she came to the less hustling side, where more than people, the nature resided; and undoubtedly the trees,wind,birds could've understand her more than this people did, she chuckled on this thought...as she realised she has came enough long way that no one could find her by now, she slowed down, her feet were tired, she herself was tired, she felt as if someone was trying to stop her from breathing.She had to find a way, a definite solution to this, she thought to herself...for how long would she stay like this?...undoubtedly he had been one of the most essential part of her life, and he is, and will remain till eternity but did he thought the same...she thought to herself?

As she went near the hill cliff, she peeped down into the deep forest below the hill, she would've screamed after seeing the height but today, she did not...her fears were eclipsed behind the pain she was in today...10months of her birth and her parents left her,10years of hallucinating Dev as her so called 'love of life' and he left her at the altar, 10weeks of marriage and Shiva had asked for divorce....what a parallel co-incidence her whole life has been, she thought...was she so easy to be hated,to be left alone,was she bad enough not good for anyone to stay with her...to hold her and provide her the warmth she had been longing for all her life?She thought to herself when sub-conciously her legs moved towards the end of the cliff...she was unknown of the fact that one more step and she would fall, her life would end but then suddenly, a voice came....

"RAAVIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

A pair of hands held her and moved her back, and she knew it was him, if at all he hadn't shouted, then also she would've recognised that it was him and no one else...she opened her eyes and looked up at him...and as she just managed to say with teary eyes and choked voice...

"SH...SHI..SHIVAA....TU AAGAYA?"

(he must've came hurriedly, his voice was panting, he was breathing heavily and plus his eyes was clearly showing how worried he was for her...she thought to herself) "CHUP....TERA DIMAG SACH MEIN MUTTER JITNA HAI...TU THIK HAI?...TUJHE ABHI LAG JAATI TOH...MAINE...MAINE BOLA THA NA KABHI...KABHI CHODKE NAHI JAUNGA...PAN TERA UPPAR KA MALA SACH MEIN KHALI HAI EK BAAT EK BAAR MEIN...SAMAJ NAHI AATI...ABHI...ABHI TUJHE KUCH HOJATA TOH MAI...TOH MAI......."

"TOH TU...TOH TU KYA SHIVA....?(she had asked this so innocently but she wanted to know =, she wanted to understand his feelings,him so that she can understand her own feelings,herself....)

"TUJHE KUCH HOJATA TOH...TOH MAI KESE...KESE....SORRYRAAVIMUJHEMAAFKARDEMAANRAHAHUNAGALTIHOGAI...HOGAI TO HOGAI...PAN AB GHAR CHAL"(and he hugged her,she could feel his warmth, the genuineness and guilt in his voice, and love in his eyes...)

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"Are hallunciations and mirages

made of a person?

If yes, then why not the person, in real----

Hallunciations are creations of mind

But they do speak language of heart;

Again when hearts denied

But the beliefs compelled

And yet again the communications failed...."

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As he saw her running away, he instantly understood the pain underneath which she was going through but then he thought to himself that it was necessary to instigate her more and more...because she was a kind of person who would never break any relations no matter what happened, so he had to forcefully make her do things, which apparently neither did he wanted nor did he meant.He also saw Gaumbi, Krish and Dev all running as Dhara told them to see to it that she doesn't do any wrong to herself...he felt helpless,alone and weak in his own home, around his own family.By now he was sure of his feelings but who would listen to his side of story,he thought...he was nothing in front of her and she deserved the world, of which he can be never part of even if he spent his whole life evolving for being her "Prince Charming" and he was neverthless going to be her first choice no matter it was then but now? he did notice of her trying to save their relationship but all he could take it was that she was apparently doing that all as a compromise and nothing else, but how could he allow her sacrificing her own life in something she cannot be even happy or proud about...he didn't even have anyone who could listen to him and afterall it was him, who had left studies for his brother's sake but no one had known this actual reason.He had some secrets...the secrets which only he had knewed,always...but she had triggered them and even had felt and even fought for them when it came to her, he remembered how in haveli when Rishita had made fun of him in his absence and how she washed all his clothes in one go, he had seen how much pain she felt when he had held that burning log of wood in his hands,she had tried to remove the particle of sand or cement from his eyes then while they were constructing room, the way she covered her pallu on second day of their marriage so that the scorching sun would not slow him down from mending the bike and her removing his hand away when he tried to cover the lamp light directly falling into her eyes,stopping her from making eye contact with him and gaze which was now he craved but abandoned it.

He was stubborn and he knew it, he knew he was wrong and though his whole family had turned their faces against him, he still chose to remain silent and not to tell anyone because for him, right now, Raavi and her getting back her freedom and happiness was more important; it had pricked him like a big thorn in his heart that he hadn't seen that gleam and shine in her eyes and that bright bubbly smile on her face after their marraige, his heart apparently loved her smile and he though wanting cannot deny that fact...atleast to himself...he did not want her to go, he never can...and things he had accused her for, even in drunk state he would not have believed or told to someone things like this...it was all out of frustration and rage and mixed emotions under which he was extremely suppressed since past days which were so heavy to bear with, he couldn't even breathe.After all, he liked him, he accepted that but for him her happiness were more important to him than his own feelings.

TO BE CONTINUED...

So, I just hope you guys like this, also the story will move forward vice-versa in characters itself...Apologies again, for mistakes in previous part...also, sorry I didn't proof read this part...Honest reviews appreciated...Happy Reading!