*Discussion Of The Week #1* Second Marriages

Hola Everyone!

We are bringing back discussion of the week after a long time to make the forum more active! 😉

Those who aren't familiar with it, we choose a topic of the week and discuss it. Everyone is free to join in and post their opinions but please keep the IF rules in mind and respect each other's opinions. STRICTLY NO BASHING! This is just for fun guys!😊

So this weeks discussion is SECOND MARRIAGE since every other drama focuses on this topic 🤣 what are you views guys? in what conditions should second marriage be accepted? (by second marriage I mean a man having 2 or more wives at the same time)

Lets begin!

Well both wives should agree to it and the husband has to be fair with both wives. They shouldn't show he treating one with respect and degrading the other one. Also everything should be transparent and the marriage should not become a burden for either of the wives

Tbh 2 wife plot sucks big time and I have yet to see a proper and decent execution in any show yet

Wow. DOTW ..finally. 😊 Thank you Hinna for making this thread.

I am ok with 2nd marriages. But the guy should do justice with both the wives as @Ruby said. No compromise on this.

2nd marriage may look as an insult for the first wife. Many ppl show pity for the wives who agree to it..but it is allowed in Islam for many reasons.

In Pak dramas they show one of the wives as an evil. Sometimes they make the husband look like a victim.

I saw few dramas which has it..but I don't think any of them dealed with the topic in a justifying way except Imam Zamin and Yaar E Bewafa.

1) Teri Bina, Thora Sa Haq : the first wife was kept a secret. The 2nd wife was shown as an evil for no reason. 😔

2) Imam Zamin: the 2nd wive was kept a secret, the 1st one was a wise woman who didn't understand why did her husband marry again although he claims to be loving her! She chose to divorce him and move on.👏

3) Yaar E Bewafa: The 1st wife chose to go abroad leaving her husband to take care of his ill mother. He got married to a widowed woman with a kid, to complete his family. Then the 1st wife came back. But finally she had to quit.😊

4) Munafiq: here the man was shown as the evil..the 1st wife was good, the 2nd was bad.

5) Lamhay: This is the first drama I saw a guy getting married to 3 wives. One remained untouched, 2nd was his love . The 3rd was good. Both the 2 first wives were shown as evils to make way for the 3rd wife to win the guy's heart.😉

Originally posted by: awida

Wow. DOTW ..finally. 😊 Thank you Hinna for making this thread.

I am ok with 2nd marriages. But the guy should do justice with both the wives as @Ruby said. No compromise on this.

2nd marriage may look as an insult for the first wife. Many ppl show pity for the wives who agree to it..but it is allowed in Islam for many reasons.

In Pak dramas they show one of the wives as an evil. Sometimes they make the husband look like a victim.

I saw few dramas which has it..but I don't think any of them dealed with the topic in a justifying way except Imam Zamin and Yaar E Bewafa.

1) Teri Bina, Thora Sa Haq : the first wife was kept a secret. The 2nd wife was shown as an evil for no reason. 😔

2) Imam Zamin: the 2nd wive was kept a secret, the 1st one was a wise woman who didn't understand why did her husband marry again although he claims to be loving her! She chose to divorce him and move on.👏

3) Yaar E Bewafa: The 1st wife chose to go abroad leaving her husband to take care of his ill mother. He got married to a widowed woman with a kid, to complete his family. Then the 1st wife came back. But finally she had to quit.😊

4) Munafiq: here the man was shown as the evil..the 1st wife was good, the 2nd was bad.

5) Lamhay: This is the first drama I saw a guy getting married to 3 wives. One remained untouched, 2nd was his love . The 3rd was good. Both the 2 first wives were shown as evils to make way for the 3rd wife to win the guy's heart.😉

Awida I only watched Munafiq fully. Both Ujala and Sobia knew about each other so somehow I could tolerate the show. TSH I never watched fully but it was bad and annoying, Zamin IMO was a looser and was totally unfair on Hareem. Thankfully Hareem left him.

i dont take it as an insult and i know its allowed for security reasons, as sometimes there are widows or orphan woman who have no caretaker...but still its very very difficult to share husbands love with another woman. I think its more difficult for the first wife as she is attached to him and shes used to having him to herself. For the second one, its easier as she already knows before getting into the marriage that she has to share him.

what they show in dramas is baeed on how our society is...i have seen quite a few men who have kept 2 wives. Either the second one is kept secret or the first wife either leaves him or keeps hating the second one. Im sure the second one would have jealousy issues too and tries to keep the husbands attention towards her. It must be a headache for the man also. 😂

But islamically shouldn't the husband take permission from first wife to marry the 2nd one?

In MNK Asad married Zarnish without informing Zara. Another idiotic twist

As I live in India,so there is no rule of two wives at a same time in Hindus. And here usually second marriage happens when one gets divorced or becomes a widow/widower

Originally posted by: Ruby7

But islamically shouldn't the husband take permission from first wife to marry the 2nd one?

In MNK Asad married Zarnish without informing Zara. Another idiotic twist

from what ive studied in Islam you dont need wifes permission but you do have to inform her, it cant be done secretly...but in Pak it is not allowed to marry without wifes permission she has to sign agreement

ok amazing topic hina, I feel from society point of view ,leaving religion aside emotionally it is very hard to be equal to two women in real life.In middle east I found from many friends and discussions attitude towards marriage in general is different.Age difference is not big issue there and multiple marriages are common.

Comparatively in south Asia second marriage has become less common simply because eg in India it is simply not legal for non Muslims to have second marriage(it doesn't stop people from having second marriage in rare instances--i know two people in my life who did it for boy child💔 ) It caused stir in society and second wife remained not legal wife,just phere liye either by hindu way or sikh way but legally no rights in property etc.Sometimes first wife adopts kids of second wife to make them legal heirs . Most people who do it are generally rich with large property which they want to pass on to boy child💔😭

But coming to actual event again I feel in our society(both india/pakistan) second marriage is not something taken lightly,fights,jealousy happens or people hide their second families ....so dramas do depict exaggeration but at least 50% is shown as reality is real. Personally I do not believe in it at all.I am against it but I don't judge people who do it as I respect individual choice,I would compare it to totally irrelevant thing but it is like I consider smoking as very bad thing to do but I don't judge smokers as bad people.

in drama like munafiq way it was shown made sense to accept second marriage as it was a relationship that got put on hold for unexpected reasons and everything was done in open with permission.

Thoda sa haq was disaster,way she has hidden wife and guy was coward. and I don't remember any other recent drama with 2 wives.

I still feel nothing beats a exclusive relationship,it is better for everyone involved.