Discussion_Indian serials & Indian values - Page 2

Originally posted by: Bonheur

Nallu, yes I believe Indian society is changing and some people are changing for worse. But, by and large, change is glacial and we need to speed up that process and also hope to reach a good equilibrium -- one where communitarianism continues to be valued but not at the expense of the individual and where individual gratification does not go to extremes.

Yeap, Indian society is heading towards the Western route. Even Sri Lankans (which i am) are also changing. Yes, i agree they are more drastical changes happening these days which, affects them badly like drug taking and divorce.

Personally, live in relationships I dont personally find it a problem to be frank. Actually, they are benefits as well disadvantages. Benefits are better understanding, love becomes stronger and more trust builds up. Disadvantages are pressure from relatives and probably frequnent fights. Well, I know people who lived together before marriage and they never had many problems. Yet, it depends on the couple itself.

Originally posted by: rojapoooo

I have been reading this for a while and am
slightly confused - are we against traditions here??
or are we questioning the culture??? As much as we
condone the system of "individuals are not allowed
to make their own decisions" why are we overlooking
the fact/option that the individuals are not ready
to exercise their rights/choices??? Akka to be honest, I was confused myself, when i read it during the first time but, then after reading other people's voice of opinions along with their reasons. I kind of got the jist of what they were talking about.

Everyone are entitied to make their own decisions along with our parents advise. Trust me parents advise are the best advise to follow.

No one can MAKE any one to do some thing -
U always end up doing what u WANT to do . At this
juncture, I want to recall some thing I read long
back - "every one is selfish and will do only things
that give them some pleasure. Even loving one's own kid
comes under this category - the parents love their kids
and that love pleases them" - this might sound silly
at the outset but if one tries to analyze with an open mind,
there is truth in this. Also, with out being gender specific,
it is easier to pass the blame on when the decision is made
by some one else!!! Exactly, i am with you. Everyone is entitled to make their own decisions and mistakes as long they know what they are doing.

We just have one life and we need to make the best of it. YES AKKA!!!! We will do that. 😳

Originally posted by: meli

Bon, its impossible to speed up things, cause there is no finale solutions to
things in our world...things has to happen by its own time and everything is
up to the individuals choices. everything lies in our hands, its us who have
to do what is best for us. Many things has been discussed about divorce and
single parenting, but those who choose to live with all the pain, couldn't they
for once try to break it off?? you live for yourself and not for the society.

its not a easy job to change.

Well, hopefully they would one day but, many older generations are to oppose that a woman should live with a man even though they have darker shades of personality. Even though, they know but pride and honary arises in their eyes.

Woman living independantly, becomes stronger in live and are enabled to stand on their two feet. Well, their main focus will be on the child. I have a friend who's like an aunt who's a single parent lives for her teenage son (1 year younger than me). If she can then why other woman dont?

Agreed Roja... only an individual can change or make changes or assimilate into the situation.

My brother's engagement is coming up. So he bought sarees for all the ladies at home. My mum's was black colour with stones and a very nice blue munthanai.

My mum is very reluctant to wear it all because my uncles will scold her for wearing Karrupu!! (My uncle's face will twist and turn in a insulting way when describing karupu). Bear in mind, my mum is the anni. Yet she bears the syndrome of "what others will say".

Although, we as in family including my dad told her, it is alright, it is a beautiful colour saree, and not totally black. End of the day, it is your son's engagement, blah blah... my mum is not convinced. Yesterday, when my sister came back from her trip, we showed her the saree. My sister loved it as well. Then my mum said she is going to keep this saree for reception, but use another saree which my brother bought for her from India for engagement. Next mo, I said to my mum, "you also look black, why don't you bleach yourself". I hated to be sarcastic to her, but she needs to stand up for herself when situation rises. The best part, she loves black.

In their syndrome of "what other people say?" my parents, also drag us down with rules and the norms of society. (though who made such a rule, I will never know. If I do, I will shoot them 😡 ) Sometimes, we rebel, other times, we abide to our parents wishes, just because we don't want to hurt their feelings.

Changes have to happen sooner or later. But the question is how many people out there can accept these kind of changes. For e.g. living together? I have a cousin who lived in with his girl for several years before marrying her. Basically he could not care the hood what others say. In short, he showed his middle finger. His mum was at despair of what others will say syndrome. His ultimatium to his mum was - who is important - your son or your relations. You make a choice and inform me. After that the mum shut up because she knew the son is stubborn enough to disown her.

Potraying women as all bad or all goody in serial gives me creep. I don't want to be in Lakshmi's /Abhi's /Netra shoes. Surely, somewhere along the line, you get tired of being goody shoes or evil person.