*From To Sathish* - Thread 3 - Page 27

Thank you nithya for posting the pics.those who see these pictures taken by me will now understand my post in the previous page 32 titled " Just another day at the beach."

Chapter 85

It had flaws, but what does that matter when it comes to matters of the heart? We love what we love. Reason does not enter into it. In many ways, unwise love is the truest love. Anyone can love a thing because. That's as easy as putting a penny in your pocket. But to love something despite. To know the flaws and love them too. That is rare and pure and perfect.? Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear


Love,what is love
Is it just a word to be thrown about
Is it just an emotion to be waved about
Is love the passionate liplock by two lovers
Is love the passionate lovemaking for long hours
Love,is it just as abstract as god
and meant to be felt only in the soul

love,it is when one remains in the shadows and dark
letting the one they love remain in the light
love,it is when one lets the one they love
bloom,flourish without even hinting that they are
the one making it possible
love is sacrifice,love is loyalty
love is focus and responsibility
love,it is so much more than just that single word
love,it is the song,it is the prayer
and it is the light that leads you from darkness
guiding you to the light of the one you love


Enter angel-Exit god


It felt like the end of the world for her and yet she knew she had to endure and live on for now another life,her child now depended on her.Thenmozhi spent most of her time in her room and refused to meet even her parents who wisely left her to her moods.Those who missed her presence like the king and her parents thought that Thenmozhi was pining for azhagan and waiting for his return.

Even though Gandharva marriage was known and followed in her times,thenmozhi worried about her pregnancy and all the talk that it would start and what kind of ill-repute would fall on her and her family.

The love she had for azhagan,the meeting with the old king and her pregnancy were all eating her up and with fear and confusion taking control over brain and brawn,all she did and could do was remain locked up in her room.

A month had passed and the situation with thenmozhi was getting worse and now her parents panicked and thought that it would be wise to call in the kings personal physician to attend to thenmozhi and see what was arong with her.

More than anyone else,including her parents,King kulashekaran pandyan missed thenmozhi the most and calling maravarman pandyan,requested him to go find out what was going on with thenmozhi.

The sun was sliding and dipping away in the west as if he found it unbearable to see thenmozhi in tears and drowned in despair.the setting sun threw his golden robes of light and caressed thenmozhi as if to say " dont worry,it will be all right."
Seeing the sun set in the west,her soul nearly tore into two for it was as if azhagan was leaving her life and moving far away never to return.Her body shook uncontrollably in bouts of crying and just when she was about to faint,two strong hands gently held her up and thenmozhi looked into maravarman pandayan's worried eyes.

She looked at him and tried to say " my lord,i am sorry i could not greet you properly for i did not hear you enter my room."

Maravarman was shocked and moved to see the change that had come over thenmozhi and in one movement,lifted her up and carried her in his arms to her bed.laying her on her bed,he clapped his hands and informed her maids to bring food and drink and lots of fruit juices.He then took a soft cloth and dipping it in cool water gently wiped thenmozhi's face,all the while wondering and worrying what had happened to her.

When the maids brought in trays of food,drink and juices,maravarman gently lifted thenmozhi's face and made her drink some fruit juice.he patiently made her drink the whole glass of juice and then wiped her face again and asked everybody to leave the room.

both were alone,alone with their thoughts and sadness and both looked at each other.

Maravarman " then,my dear then,what or who has done this to you.please tell me what is hurting you so badly that it has taken away the brave thenmozhi,the beautiful thenmozhi that i know and miss badly and has left behind a husk of the original.this is not the thenmozhi who people think will do a better job as a queen,ruling the pandyan kingdom than even me,the rightful heir.This is i am sad to say is someone else trying to pass off as thenmozhi and doing a very poor job of it."

Thenmozhi sobbed loudly and maravarman pandyan did what any soul will do when they see someone they care in so much despair.He did something that most of us would do or think of doing when we see someone really broken,lost and lonely.

( i do it all the time,if i my soul feels someone is sad and needs a few kind words or just needs someone to sit by them to fill their loneliness.9 out of 10 times it has worked and helped,but a few times i have been asked to mind my own business and leave them alone.)


Maravarman sat by thenmozhi and lifting her placed her on his wide and strong chest.holding her gently,he stroked her head and whispered " then,you are all grown up and are now a strong willed woman.but there were times when i have held you as a child and have carried you to the balcony to see the sun rising which you always pointed to.You have held my hand and walked all over this palace and there have been days when you have fallen asleep on my shoulders and in my arms.so with that memory,with that pure love i ask you to tell me,confide in me on what is troubling you."

Thenmozhi in a frightened voice whispered " i am pregnant."

the words were like a thousand sharp arrows flying into maravarman pandyan's body and yet calmly " so,what is the problem ? "

Thenmozhi " i am pregnant.i am carrying azhagan's child.but i will not be able to marry him."

Maravarman pandyan " thenmozhi,my little childish brat thenmozhi is carrying another thenmozhi in her.this is the best and sweetest news that has fallen in my ears."

thenmozhi slightly irritated moved back and glared at maravrman pandyan " didn't you hear me say that i will not be able to marry azhagan who is the child's father.don't you realise what and in how many ways people will talk about me and my family."

Marvarman looked at her "am i allowed to ask why you and azhagan cannot be married,when the king himself has given his consent.And knowing azhagan,i am sure he will not hesitate a second in marrying you,since both of you are so madly in love with each other."

Thenmozhi's eyes brimmed with tears and her lips quivered in pain and sadness " no,we cannot marry.no,azhagan does not know about my condition and he has gone away on a very important quest and i am not sure when he is going to come back or if he is going to come back at all.Now do you see and understand my desperate situation."

Maravarman sighed and let out a deep breath and looked at her with a smile and thenmozhi in anger " you are smiling.here i am half dead in fear wondering how or what i am going to do and you are smiling."

Maravarman pandyan still smiling nodded " yes,i am smiling.i am smiling because i still see the childish brat that you once were.I am smiling,remembering all the troubles you used to get into and all the times i saved you.i am smiling because i am happy that you have given me an opportunity to save your beautiful head again."

thenmozhi shook her head " what,save me again,how ? save me how ?"

Maravarman pandyan looked at her gently " then,my dear thenmozhi,will you marry me.if we are married,i can save you and more importantly you will be saving me with your love and companionship.I know it is a very sudden and abrupt statement but believe me there is nothing abrupt about my love.I have loved you from the time i have known you.I loved you for the spoilt and evil brat that you were.i have loved you more when you bloomed into a beautiful and intelligent woman and i promise to love you more and more until my last breath.But i want you to take time and think about it and then make a decision."


Thenmozhi did not know how to react and gently taking his hand,she kissed it and looked into the great man's eyes " you are willing to marry me,accept me and love me even though you know my body and soul belonged to someone else."

Maravarman pandyan nodded happily and " yes,with my whole heart.but if we are married.i hope you will come to love me and i hope your love will be for me only.I say this because i am only human anddd."

Thenmozhi looked at him with new eyes " human,no i see a god,i see an angel,i see a saviour.My lord,my king,i accept your love wholeheartedly and i promise you this,that it will be only you in my body and soul."

Both looked at each other in gratitude and gently sat in silence and more importantly in peace as the sun sank in the west leaving its child,the moon to reflect its soft on its two children who were about to walk a new path.

kathalum kadavulai pola athai uyiril unaranum mella


Ragasiyamanathu kathal
miga miga Ragasiyamanathu kathal

mugavari sollamal mugam thanai maraikkum
oru thalaiyakavum sugam anubavikkum
suvarasyamanathu kathal
miga miga suvarsayamanathu kathal

sollamal seiyum kathal kanamanathu
sollach sonnalum
solvathumillai manamanathu
sollum sollai thedi - thedi yugam ponathu
intha sogam thanae kadhalile sugamanathu

vasanai velichathai pola
athu suthanthiramanathum alla
irathai iruthinai pola
athu olinthidum velivarum mella

Ragasiyamanathu kathal
miga miga Ragasiyamanathu kathal



ketkaamal kattum anbu uyarvanathu
kettu koduththalae kathal angu uyirakuthu
kettum kelvi kathal thaane pathil vazhuthu
kathal kettu vangum porulum alla iyalpaanathu
neerinai neruppinai pola
viral thoduthalil purivathum alla
kathalum kadavulai pola athai uyiril unaranum mella

Ragasiyamanathu kathal
miga miga Ragasiyamanathu kathal


My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep;
The more I give to thee
The more I have,
For both are infinite.

- Romeo and Juliet


"Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love", which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident." Louis de Bernires

All thoughts and comments are welcome for a chapter which took two hours to write and that which is the first turn and first twist in the story.

I will share my thoughts soon, Satish.

I found the twist shocking...but I also found it abrupt and manipulative.

"Bahubali"

Thenmozhi has agreed to marry maravarman pandyan because she is pregnant and she has no other path left for her and her son.thenmozhi agrees to marry maravarman pandyan because the lights and the king of the forest spirits threatened her with dire consequences to her and her childs life.pregnant and alone,poor thenmozhi had no other way forward and hence this marriage.

Marvarman pandyan did the best and the most honorable thing by agreeing to marry thenmozhi for her security and to protect her honor.

i thought the chapter and the interaction which was sad,tender,full of honor and loyalty,which is true love though sudden was the only way i could twist and move forward as you will see when we come to the climax.so much more to be written.


But spain,thank you for the thoughts for i can understand how you are involved with the story and the characters.that is a triumph for me.and that is enough for me.

After watching "Bahubali" and all its magnificent and grandeur visuals...

Love story

I,satish kumar,have learnt more in life and through contact with other lives than what i was taught in school and college.I,me,mine has become we,all,together through the wisdom i have gathered from others and their thoughts and i have learnt what real courage means from watching other lives as they fight the good fight.

I don't know how many of you remember the serial RAJAKUMARI which had ramya krishnan in the lead where i played her younger brother.the serial launched in jan 2013,flopped and vanished in a few months.This flop serial came after thangam and before vamsam.One of the few good things that came out of it was my trip to kashi (varnasi) for a few days of shooting and the significant other thing that i am leading up to is the few days of shooting at sivananda ashram in maraimalainagar.

Sivananda ashram is an orphanage for children and old people and also doubles up as boarding and lodging for old people who can afford their own cottage,a small one indeed.I had shot in this location long ago in 2007 for a serial called vasantham with actress durga and went back to the same place in 2013 january.

For many who come in contact with me i come across as a very strong,aggressive,straight forward and a very frank,brutally frank person and all this combined many a times leads people to think that i am very cold,introverted and arrogant person.Only few,very few know better and otherwise.Maybe it is true what most people feel and think of me,but then it is what they think and feel and really does not matter to me what goes in their minds.

But in reality,i am a softy.I cannot bear to see people cry,people being sad and lonely and even when sad scenes or crying scenes come on tv or movies,i close my eyes tightly and cover my ears.With this interior you can imagine what i would have felt when i saw so many lonely old people,abandoned people living out their lives in loneliness.It broke my heart and it still does.All the spare time i had and when i was not required for some scenes i sat with all the oldies and spoke to them,joked with them,gave my telephone number to the few who asked for it and heard them,really heard them as they cried and broke down while narrating their sad lives.

But two stories of a couple and one old man has been seared and branded forever in my soul and sometimes when i am alone in the beach i cry for them and so many like them.I send out prayers for all of them and ask my god to watch over them.


First story

Outside a small,one bedroom cottage i saw an old man,very,very old man drying clothes,importantly sarees.I stood out of sight and watched him slowly spread the sarees on the clothes lines and then he hung one old dhoti,his own with a few holes in it and also hung a vest out to dry with even more holes in it.Towards the evening,i was waiting for one last scene to happen and so i went strolling around the place and my feet found its way to the cottage,where i had seen the old man hanging clothes to dry and found him sitting outside with a calm and serene expression on his face.I said " hello" and he smiled and turned to look inside and said " amma,paakanum,paakanumnu sonniye,andha paiyan vandhirukkan."

I peeped inside and saw an old lady on a bed with a walker next to her.the old man slowly got up and asked me to come inside.I went in and sat with them and spent time and gathered that he was nearly 87 years old and she was 81 years old.they had been married for nearly 60 years and their only son was no more.their daughter-in-law and grand children were abroad and visited them once in a blue moon.

An assistant director came in search of me and said the next scene would start in about ten minutes and asked me to get ready.I took leave of the old couple,promising them i would come spend time whenever possible while i was in the ashram.

I did see them for a week or so and then the serial went downhill,story changed in desperation by the producers trying to salvage the slot.little good it did and rajakumari was that and soon vamsam started.

I still recollect,i still remember the old man carefully and lovingly drying his wife's sarees on the clothesline and well at this point i have no words as to describe that love,that loyalty and i doubt if my words or thoughts can justify that love story.


to be continued

Class: 40 th Std (All students are above 40 years)

Attendance Time.

Anger - Present sir
Anxiety - Present sir
Boredom - Present sir
Desires - Present sir (in full volume)
Frustration - Present sir
Monthly EMI - Present sir (in full volume)
Tension - Present sir
Sadness - Present sir
Worries - Present sir
Uncertainties - Present sir
Happiness - ??? (no sound)
Happiness - ???
Happiness - Absent sir
Peace of mind - Absent sir
Contentment - Absent sir