The Great Divide

I am a bit late. Sorry about that. This is a new year's gift to all you beautiful dreamers and especially my sworn enemy Joey.

The drive to the Circuit House was a bit long. And now Kranti said she had forgotten to load the tiffin. Raj was hungry and it didn't go well with his temper at all. She was hungry too. She saw a passing dhaaba and asked him if they could go there. Huh! What a downtown place. He refused to slow down. She was a bit annoyed. Well good! It was her fault anyway. There seemed to be no decent restaurant in sight by the road. She asked him to stop the car immediately. He braked hard. Now what was the matter? She was out of the car in a flash. She pointed out to another dhaaba and went on. Raj got down from the car and walked towards her. He looked around. There were charpoys and low tables. She took a seat. The waiter came forward. Waiter? Oh for Heaven's sake!! He looked like an urchin. He was eagerly reciting the items on the menu. She was smiling and seemed tickled by those extraordinary names. Raj shook his head. What the devil was he in for? The place was full of odours. He kind of covered his nose as inconspicuously as he could. She told him to take a seat. He did. She asked him to order something for himself. He refused. The place was full of flies and fleas. She was happily tucking into the food while he was revolted. He couldn't stand it any more. He left the money on the table and told her to come to the car when she had finished. He didn't care for the place and didn't bother with manners either. Let her sit by herself and lick her fingers. He was off.

They were soon on their way. And still no proper restaurant was coming into view. He was getting irritated. His hunger was making him lose his temper. She took out a packet of parathas and offered him one. He humphed. He wouldn't touch it. His hunger was going to get better of him. She said since it was unwanted she had better feed some animal instead. She realised he was hungry and cajoled him into taking one. He took one rolled it and began to eat. Yuck. It was degrading. After a bite or two he realised that it was quite tasty.

They reached the Circuit house. What a tinpot plan his brother had come up with! A holiday indeed ! He began to unload the luggage and she refused his help. What the hell? Did she always have to repeat she didn't need his help? He didn't want to help her either. Her continuous chatter in the car was as it is irritating. He banged the dickey shut. They made their way to their room. She took one look at the single bed and flipped. She couldn't see an extra mattress in sight. He realised they couldn't ask for one because they had to keep up the pretences. She made a face, almost sulked actually. He was amused. His eyes narrowed. He had to be careful when she was in this mood. She told him that he should sleep on the floor for a change. She had been sleeping on the floor at home. He and sleep on the floor? Hah! Over his dead body. He sat on the bed and told her NO. Since she had practice she should continue the practice. Or they could amicably share the bed……each to his side of course. She jumped up and faced him, indignation written all over her face. She rubbished that idea. He taunted her about being a darpok KK. She was even more infuriated now. And he was enjoying it. She said he was clever at twisting logic. She told him it was not the question of being a coward. A girl needed to be careful. He looked at her with a raised eyebrow. He wasn't just any man, he was her husband. She told him she didn't believe in this marriage and he wasn't her husband. He looked surprised. He reminded her that she had forced marriage on him and still behaved like the injured party. Her eyebrows furrowed and she looked away. Aha! The dart had hit bull's eye. Whenever truth reached her, she looked away in the same manner. He loved it when she felt awkward. He pursed his lips to hide the smile that was threatening to emerge on his face. She turned back and told him not to play games with her. She could answer him back in any coin. He had just about had it. He reminded her that all this show of courage was because she knew how safe she was with him. She looked away. She said she would bring the roof down if he dared to touch her. He grabbed her arms and brought her close. She had no strength to match his. He spoke to her through clenched teeth and told her not to try his patience. She was not his type anyway. He threw her arms and let her go. She went to the cupboard and took out a long piece of black cloth.

Now what was brewing in her head? She told him this was a curtain to divide the bed. He could choose his side. He smiled inwardly. If he had wanted her, would this piece of cloth act as a barricade? She was out of her mind. She was showing a lot of belligerence but inwardly she was a frightened little kitten. Frightened of what? Him? Or herself? He told her they were no ordinary married couple. She slipped off her mangalsutra and put it on the table with a thud. There she said. It had no meaning. Just a silly black thread round her neck. He told her she would understand the real meaning when she realised its value. He was softening towards her and yet she was always on the defensive with him. He sighed and left the room.

She was alone in the room. She couldn't understand why she was saying and doing things to exasperate him. She was a bit afraid. She was alone with him. This time the family was not there to protect her. She looked at the great divide she had made. What a joke! Why did she constantly bicker like this with him? Yes, that was one way of keeping him away from her. She felt she was weakening in some way and she didn't like that feeling at all. She was afraid. She realised she was attracted to him. Was this due to physical proximity? She grimaced. It had to be that. On a mental level they were poles apart. O God! What was she thinking? They were poles apart on the physical level too. Then why this apprehension? There was something going on within her, and she couldn't put her finger to it. Her breath caught in a nervous gasp. She was not going to be weak. She was not … she was not. Where was Raj? Why had he left her alone? She didn't realise she was missing him when he was away.

She returned to her room after meeting Nirmal di. To convince her that things were just fine between her and Raj, she had slipped her hand in his. He had looked down at her first and then at their entwined hands. She had smiled awkwardly at him. He seemed to understand. She felt so sheepish. They walked to their room. She quickly removed her hand once they were out of Nirmal's sight. She felt worse when that she had to close the door of her room. She nervously fiddled with ends of her dupatta as she turned to look at him.

Raj had been a bit taken aback when she had slipped her hand in his. This was the first time she had done such a thing. It had always been him who held her or touched her. And she had always shaken him off. Ha ha! This time she had quietly walked with him, gently clasping his hand and smiling at him.

He looked at her. She was uncomfortable. He suddenly felt sorry for her and something more. It was a strange feeling. Her hand had felt good in his. It was small and warm and curled perfectly within his large one. If only things had been different. Dear God he thought to himself. What the hell was he thinking? He looked at her again. She was looking at him too. The air suddenly crackled. They were both aware of the charged atmosphere. She shivered. He put out his hand to hold her. She moved closer to him. She was about to ………. There was a knock on the door. It was Sanjay.