Originally posted by: kayamath_fan2
Sonya you gotta forgive me for rereading the post and quoting only some phrases...which I really really loved a LOT!!
Anu, I gotta thank you for re-reading and coming up with new ideas. You know I could read a single poem a million times and yet come up with something new every time I read it again.
PS: didnt make much sense though...dont know..while writing I was shivering...and had the fear I might ruin the essence of your post..=( Sorry for that!!! Youve written everything so so perfectly and it was sooo touching that it doesnt make sense to say anything ... cause your posts says everything!!
Had to end the post abrupty, since its getting late at my end...!!
No you wouldn't ruin the essence of my post, but rather cover its shortcomings.
The candles were confused whether they were lighting up the stage or Paro was lighting them.
WHAT a BEAUTY, Sonya !!!! Seriously...Dont know how to tell you ..but your metaphors are gorgeous, I cant tell you how much I love them !! This is one of them...
Anu, the metaphors just came to my mind. It's no talent! You know I'm of the opinion that journalistic writing is active, but literary writing is passive. You have to feel a certain way to write like that. Sonu (ght_sajan) has already hinted at this. If I don't like a character or a story, I can never force myself to write about it. And even if I do, it turns out so ugly.
Her smile was so priceless when the other girls told her that Dev has come! loved the change..from despair, from the fear that she might never see Devdas again...to joy !! WOW! that few seconds were so beautiful !!!
When Dev made his entry on the stage - Paro didnt even see him..but did you see how her face was glowing of happiness? As if for that very second..she was lost in a world with only Paro and Dev...thats SG magic, I guess ;)
But that smile, that happiness...that was her INNER part..her SOUL...Butterflies were there everywhere...in each part of her body..yet you could read that all from her outer appearance...She couldnt hide all of her emotions..and how could she?? DEV came to meet her...the only person who is the reason for her existence..of course she couldnt hide her emotions..
See there comes the addition from your part. I totally missed the change in Paro's expression when she heard the news of Dev's coming. I couldn't have described it better than a change from fear and despair to joy (hmmm.. most probably I'll steal this idea of yours whenever required in any piece of writing. Sorry for that, but you didn't specify your copyright issues).
the grace that she showed in that particular sequence..wowww...truly amazing !!!
THAT SMILE made us all crazy!! what a divine smile!!like you said...soo subtle yet so impactful!!
I pointed out her smile's subtlety, but not it's impact. So there you go again. Thank you for completing the incomplete phrase.
Then, as he was just a few metres away from her...you could see some awkwardness in Paro...
dhak dhak dhak dhak - her heartbeat...with a speed of a vulcano! (Okay, Sonya, you gotta bring a better allegory!)
A volcano is good, cuz it incorporates heat too which can be indicative of her passion for Dev. Hmmmm, could we come up with a better symbol? It's weird in how the right word hits me randomly. So I'll return if I can come up with something appropriate. Or perhaps others who are reading this discussion could suggest something?
The next part brought my eyes into tears..She tells him of how everybody left her..and her one and only reason of her existence was Dev..but more probably her love for Dev...and the hope that he ll return to her and they ll unite for once and forever...so when he told her that they have to part ways, that it is better that way..she was shattered..she thought her hope would be fulfilled, she waited for soo long but in vain, because he came to tell her a final bye forever...how can he sacrifice his love for the sake of others? NO- Paro cant do that!!! She cant live without him !!! If they part ways, its as good as she doesnt exist anymore in this universe...cause there should be a reason, an aim in your life..and when the aim itself goes away from her... then theres nothing worth...
Sonya you gotta correct me here if Im wrong..
No Anu I don't need to correct you, but rather say, "now who could describe Paro's pain better than this?" - I just hope you haven't felt it (jokes).
This particular part reminded me of Romeo and Juliet...Romeo got a letter about the pretended death of Juliet..so he rushed to Verona..and so got himself poisoned...and when Juliet realised what he had done...she killed herself as well...
the parallel I see here..is that in both stories ..once Romeo/Dev left/will leave her..there is no need to live..
Loved your parallelism of Dev and Romeo. There's something universal in these characters. A pain they all shared. And you know while I was writing that piece, I was wondering if there is any similarity and you said it.
but she fought..with dignity..she poured her heart out - she confessed that she also suffered a lot during his absence...
and how he could neglect her dard...she tries to convince him to stay...
Another phrases which I LOVEEED !!!
She doesn't mind spending a lifetime in separation as long as the diya she holds is alight.
The amazed look she gave on hearing Dev's final word on separation is indicative of her awareness that her world has come to an end. She wondered what she could offer to destiny to save herself from this catastrophe.
Her eyes refused to weep as Paro wondered how she could be still alive after hearing her life telling her "You have no purpose to live." She couldn't decide if she's living these moments or experiencing death, how could you react to such an internal turmoil but express it through thunderstruck eyes?
BTW- really sorry Sonyaa..but I soo cant give you a proper reply...I repeated everything what you already said!! sorry for that!!!! after reading your posts I LOST the words...the language..everything just disappeared..im being very honest...it actually had a hypnotising effect !!! will try to reply next time after some time...youre posts say everytihng that it becomes difficult to say more than"PERFECT ANALYSIS" !!!!! 👏 👏 👏
Anu, you've perfected the "Pefect Analysis." Keep adding more ideas as they come to your mind. Together, we can keep adding beauty to Paro's saga.
Vasudha
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