Guide to Parenting by Shilpa Sharma MESSAGE pg37 - Page 29

Originally posted by: ArtiMayur.Meeno

Hiii Sabah,Hey Tehmina, i am always astonished at your forgiving heart, I never reply, hardly keep in touch yet find your hand of friendship still open...You have a big heart!
How are u?Better finding your words here...
So finnalyyy Sttep 13 huhI know, I didn't know that I knew enough words to elaborate this far...I hope my remaining vocabulary suffices for the rest of the journey...
I must say you do take alot of notice on SA behaviour and totallly understand it...like even further than the roots of the relationship...LOLFor me beauty has always been in the details, the why behind each nuance of expression of the actor, and each elongated syllable and pause of the writers words.
I loved ur step 13..It is important to pause live life once in awhile....to catch up with things we dropped in the way.I like to turn my whole life into a stroll in the wilderness of an undiscovered meadow....life is just too short for ugliness!
SA is marvellousss...what can i say about her....She is kinda doing something that her son doesnt like(lying to him and sending him to college, so Nups can gve him roses) but she is just doing it for the sake of his frienship with Nupur and to bring a smile on his face.How many mother in laws would willingly, loving and so encouragingly push their sons into the arms of their 'rival' but therein lies Shilpa Aunty's difference she sees Nupur as not her rival but ally in nurturing Mayank!
Yea, that's about the wisest thing i can say..!!! LOL...even tho u mite not find them wise...Wonderful!
LOVE MAYUR AND SHILPA AUNTY..Miss them loads...
srslyy, i really wanna see SA with Mayur now...maybe she can help them sort out the divorce silsila...Tehmina, my heart bruises, with each passing day staining deeper...
IT would be nice to see her back and the show..and a gft from MJHT to you, Sabah! Tehmina, I would forgive so much more...
I know how much u admiree Shilpa Aunty😉😆She is a role model after a long era of people to avoid turning into...
Anwyzz, once again your topic totalllyyy rocked!!!At my age, all this rocking is probably inadvisable!
Take care
Love,
Meeno😃Love Sabah

Originally posted by: Senny

Sabah, Finally made it to my little oasis...this thread each and every post here is like flowing water,By God, i didn't know you were going to say this before I typed my last remark...we truly do share the same wave length... once we are a part of it, we are in it and there is no turning back. We just want to keep on flowing ahead and for once let that flowing water decide our route. 😳Beautiful! 👏⭐️True if we struggle, we drown, but once we learn to relax we find that we actually and surprisingly float!
Its so beautiful to be able to trust another wholeheartedly without any fear of being betrayed or deceived. The posts here guide me through and make me move ahead. I don't have to do anything, they automatically find their way here in this beautiful wonderland which indeed makes me look at reality with a new vision every time.I am so sorry for being a little late, though its such a delight to read each step that i want to do it when my mind is totally at ease but that at times is hard to achieve. Today I called it the day for this delight!😆 😳Take your 'sweet' time! This broadband speed of life irks me, I do not want to set such minimum speed limits here too. I also don't want to have to start constructing curbing road bumps..
😳
Coming to step 10. This is where I left from, I am so sorry for taking you a few steps behind with me Sabah but I am sure soon we would be ahead but I won't be able to race ahead as then we won't be able to enjoy and appreciate each and every step as it deserves to be Sabah. I will try to pace a little.Again, please take your time...life will undoubtedly race past our grasps but sometimes we can be allowed a little lenient lazy lamha!

Finally coming to step 10 titled "Expect the impossible." Wow what a beautiful connection actually a development from step 6. Nothing is impossible comes after what we think, our expectations are linked to our though process which are later on possibly materialised into actions. Now here did i just use the word possibly, oh yes i did hehe,😆Loved it! The possibility of the impossible. We humans and our bizarre ideas. We force words to shamefully bend and adhere to incongruity and lend their forms to irrational meanings..
Sabah this quantum theory of mechanics is something which reminds me that its about time to brush my physics, I have studied it earlier in school but still can't seem to recall this theory. We didn't learn it at school, for it is still quite a 'theory' and still evolving of sorts. However I loved physics and science at school and spent many an extra hour in the laboratory doing extra research...I guess another part of the Sabah puzzle just fitted into that 'square' hole! Well we can begin afresh, this theory as per which either things are 100% or 0% does make me wonder about the whole probablities concept in mathematics and their status with respect to this theory. I am not too sure where am I heading but if applying this theory to real life then life sure does take a new turn for me.😳I have always thought of probabilities as silly, for surely things will be or not be...there cannot be a more likely or less likely as evidenced by those things that happen extraordinarily..like gray clouds that DO NOT burst their seams...So when i found a theory that said the same, I attached myself to its frame to steady myself in this world of actuarial dependency!
Expect the impossible is an irony in itself, as generally we never expect impossible things to happen, we know its never possible so why think but children do take parents on such rides where parents do end up tasting this irony as rightly pointed out by these examples Sabah.👏I loved this scene, that fact that Holi is a day of colour 'surprises' we try to shock each other with red and blues, just as in real life people turn your world all the strips of the rainbow!
Why go in theory when we have practical examples in front of us, Mayank and drunk well initially i didn't like that scene much to be honest as it was so different from the normal M I was use to watching and now this drunk M who was so irrational, unreasonable and like a child was something I couldn't accept as this was not the sophisticated, mature and cool M. But gradually I started to understand the beauty of this scene and the sincerety and innocence of M came out at its best in this scene.👏I too don't like the idea of 'drunk' not in their conscious state people! however for me this scene manifested to Mayank that life itself, let alone feelings are in the control of destiny and not his independent self!
It was a pleasant sight to watch an immature M who was well cared for in her way by the mature N. Imagine N being mature in front of M, as the norm was always the opposite so this was indeed expecting the impossible to happen for Shilpa aunty and N, but both handled him really well hehe.😆Loved the insight! I did not see it that way before!👏👏👏
Nupur oblivious wow, I had never thought of it but i personally feel that N deep down had thought of the possiblity of falling in love with M but then just as the quantum mechanics theory she was 100% sure that he won't fall for a girl like her and thus she deliberately chose to be oblivious to her feelings and even showed to the world the same picture which she made herself view.I see the picture you are describing, for me Nupur obliviousness is as Aunty sees it, as a matter of fact...the why and how mystery is not actually important, what is important is how we proceed from here..
I realised I am not connecting the dots well, I love the way Shilpa aunty comes and puts colour on his face, never leaving her grace no matter what she does.😳She was so adorable...Some adults can't get away with child like behaviour, but with Shilpa Aunty, you scream out for more...😳
Sabah, I don't understand this bit like what was Shilpa aunty thinking here, what about her was so alluring in her opinion which made her so special for Mayank as well!As Nupur defines Mayank, she is a little hatke, so then she would bring in that disorder that Mayank's organized regimented agreement with life needed quite desperately!
I couldn't have said better, indeed its not just Shilpa aunty's faith in love, she practices her faith as she loves M and even N in such a way that one can do nothing but be moved and feel immensely loved and blessed. Just the way you do Sabah!😳Butterfly, I only wish I were as beautiful as Shilpa Aunty or you...I would even need wings to find myself flying high...
Love you loads,Even more so from me...Sabah
Senny.

Originally posted by: Senny

Hey Sabah,butterfly twice in a row...if you keep raising the expectation then eventually this will be known as Butterfly and her admirer's thread...
If the bear is to lead the dance and he can dance well, then i am more than willing to hand over the reins to him😆.Butterfly you just kill me...🤣 I will make sure he hires a tuxedo too.
Coming to step 11 titled "Merry go rounds", did I ever tell you Sabah I was really scared of riding on them. I don't know why but I always had this fear that I would fall down, my childhood friend Liz fell down when we were really young and I just felt as if the next turn would be mine. 😭For me I was always scared of swings. For once I sat on one I would inevitably NOT be satisfied until i scared myself, by breaking my own safe limits...basically I don't trust myself.However we shouldn't fear the unseen...what is meant to be will happen whether you swing upon that swing, let loose upon that merry go round OR sit still in your sitting room...so might as well be out having fun!
Only recently we took all the children to a fair, each one of them was thrilled to be there, one of them asked me to sit on the merry go round with her, I wanted to say no, my inside was jumping up and down with fright but I couldn't let my fear ruin her excitement thus I went and Sabah guess what it wasn't scary at all. I had not even tried and when i did, I realised that i missed on so much fun for many many years but now I never leave an opportunity to sit on one hehe.😆Destiny always brings you to the truth, to what we fear...just like Mayank..." A life lived in fear...is a life half lived! "
Me and my endless swaying, back to the point. I love that title to begin with. Mayank and Shilpa aunty have spent this journey of life beautifully not missing on any part of life, Shilpa aunty has spent it with grace and taught M how to live life like she did meanwhile giving him the freedom to choose how to live it on his own as well, allowing him to trust his own judgement ( just as you have always told me to do so Sabah).😳Exactly, AND i don't say that to everyone. For some should NEVER trust themselves nor their hearts, However all is not lost, for we may mend them and nourish them back to the point of dependable sage!

Quoting you, awwwwww so beautifully put Sabah "She pushes off this merry-go-round at a gentle pace, slowly caressing Mayu's head and that special sass of hers, also known as Smart Alec Sharma Sarcasms, lulling him into a false sense of security before she begins a whirl of tortuous discursiveness."👏 👏 👏

You have described each and every part of this scene so well Sabah. Arjun and Vaishnavi certainly have as always acted way beyond the script and added their own beauty to it, some actors have this charm that it automatically gets transferred to their work and so is the case with these two brilliant actors!👏True, I think another reason we hold on to MJHT instead of hoping for a merciful end, is that thought of not seeing the chemistry between theses couples. For although undoubtedly Shilpa Aunty and Mayu are exceptional upon paper and would have illuminated the screen who ever played them, Vaishnavi and Arjun have given them that extra radiance that if others tried to imitate would end up with radioactive poisoning! I agree, M doesn't understand what Shilpa aunty does, actually I feel Sabah, see again I am using possibly hehe😆, he does understand deep down inside but doesn't want to accept it or think much about it, he is just trying to escape from it and thus getting more trapped in his mind.Poor Mayu, I feel sorry for him....as my heart urges Aunty on...😆I agree with the last bit and I think M is all set and geared for the vertigo ahead, he won't give up so easily would he? But at times I feel accepting our true feelings is one of the courageous things to do which we get to witness ahead.😃True, by accepting ourselves only then can others accept us too. However some feelings should be abandoned after their realizations, they should be expunged and left in isolation.
God bless you as always,😳God bless us all in abundance, especially the aching hearts in this forum. We are in dire need of strength, mercy and steadfastness in the face of abject unconcern! Senny.deep and dependent love, Sabah😳

Originally posted by: mayadika11

As an adult we learn that pausing life is difficult, however for the sake of our child's sanity we must learn to 'live' pause it. For we may be able to pause and smell the roses along our paths but by becoming those roses we may 'live' pause life and taste all of its wondrous beauty as we sway along life's routed way. hii sabah first of all thanx a lot for the pm dear ok now about this part awesooooooooome as usual sweety loved it to the core very well said dear simply loved these lines yaar absolutely right for ones child's sake a mother or a parent must learn to live is difficult this is absolutely right dear as u have written........... Thanks for replying, Maya, this is beyond generosity. I am humbled...😳

{Lesson number thirteen by Mayank. Life is like an escalator, whether you stand, sit or sleep, it is forever moving forwards.}superb lesson by our mayu i completely agree with him dear zindagi paani ki lehar ki tarah hoti hai, jismein humein behte hi rehna hai, chahe jitne bhi toofaan aaye,lehron mein jitne bhi utar-chadaav aate hain woh bhi humaari hi zindagi ka hissa ban jaate hain love u mayu for this lovely lesson......... You are so poetical! Loved it! 👏👏👏Maya really this is very beautiful! ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Shilpa Aunty understands that although finding time to pause life is improbable, it is far more impossible to rewind or fast forward past burgeoning feelings, as Mayank tries too. shilpa aunty is absolutely right i completely agree with her, unhone zindagi bahut dekhi hai aur unhe pata hai ki yaadein zindagi ka hissa hai, haan kadvi ho ya meethi yaadein humesha saath rehti hain.......aur koi unhe chahkar bhi mita nahin sakta hai.......Again just wonderful! ⭐️⭐️⭐️👏👏👏True, we cannot regress, even though most of us would like to crawl back to a stage when we were lying curled in our mother's wombs!

In the scenes previous to this, we witness Mayank fast forward the conclusion of his discussion with CJ; mute Nupur and rewind their relationship back to a point where they were mere acquaintances. Naivety indeed, for as Shilpa Aunty understands, no matter how many times you may rewind life eventually you have to either play forward or eject!shilpa aunty knows that life is not always a bed of roses she is such a mature and an understanding parent i love her......and respect her a lot.......She is wisdom manifested as light radiating through fragrant delicate gold dust! If we tried to capture her beauty, it would just flit though our fingers. All we can do is watch in awe and pray that some of that beauty falls upon us and then sticks!

I applaud MJHT for their well rounded characterization of Shilpa Aunty; a parent but also a woman who intertwines classic wisdom with modern charm. When life impinges upon her leisure time, she 'live' pauses the intrusion and saturates her conversation with Nupur in filmy fun! This 'live' pausing can only be accomplished by the joyful at heart; those souls whom beauty itself seeks out for respite! oh sabah i so loved this last line dear really shilpa aunty is truly a woman of substance rocking woman, doting mom, and an adorable-cute-bubbly saas i must say yaar, nups is so lucky to have her......and mayu is damn lucky man.......I never accept praise for my words. However sometimes destiny fits descriptions into my mind so aptly and vividly that as they flow out thought the tapping of my fingers upon the keyboard, that I then read upon the screen, my heart shouts out, Yes this is the truth. I too love these words, for they are the truest I have said about shilpa Aunty!

Impressively MJHT creators depict Shilpa Aunty as Mayu's mom as much as Shilpa Sharma. In maintaining this distinction before her son she imparts the grace for him to reciprocate. For Mayank Sharma is not only Mayu, but Mayank the trustworthy friend, Mayank the gentleman lover and Mr Mayank Sharma the husband.absolutely right sweety really that's why i love MJHT so-so much for depicting their characters in so many different shades and attributes.......most memorable characters indeed.......Most memorable, and 'real' as compared to the shadows, figments and characters that I met daily too! Everyday see people impersonate themselves...human beings have become quite ludicrous, so my heart gladdened at finding people to aspire to, fictitious as they are...were...😳

Majority of parents 'static' pause their child's development in childhood if not new born baby period, unable to accept evolving avatars, they stagnate through cotton wool suffocation. Shilpa Aunty refreshingly welcomes Nupur to share her home and her most beloved object that resides therein.bco'z she is shilpa aunty yaar as i have mentioned before nups and mayu are the luckiest human beings on earth to have her in their life......I feel blessed to have merely witnesses her! Her light is a daily inspiration. It has made me a better daughter for sure!

Much to Mayank's chagrin she talks to her ally openly in the face of his hostility; unable to unpause this 'live' pause he leaves, understanding that in this scene he is a mere man between two women's friendship. mayu is certainly a mature and an understaning man use pata hai ki jab do aurtein aapas mein baat kar rahin ho toh uska koi kaam nahin hai beech mein........so better leave them alone with each other..........😆😆😆Just loved it! 👏

I love how he never comes between Nupur and his mom, even when he could rightfully demand it from his mother. Even when in Ahmedabad, Nupur tells him that Shilpa Aunty would always take her side, he does not refute the claim!

That final effervescent beaming smile of Shilpa Aunty's encompassing the joy of a mother but also a woman. that's why i love, adore and respect shilpa aunty so much, truly a woman of substance indeed........Blessed with a graceful form too. That is potency indeed!

hey sabah rocking ud dear loved it yaar..........Kindness upon generousity! Thanks Maya.😳Love Sabah

Originally posted by: a little faith

Originally posted by: a little faith

Originally posted by: a little faith

I am back.. though not in full force...

I beseech God for consistency. I beseech you for wisdom

Step Eight - Tides.

As constant as the rising and setting of the sun; as forceful as the tidal pull of the moon; as expected as the awaited changing of seasons, mothers must consistently encompass a grand harmony over our child's chaotic earth.

{Lesson Eight By Mayank. Our ancestors used to say that 'Your parents are like the Sun and the Moon' you cannot afford to neglect them, for their very presence affects the push and pull of the tides upon the shores of your heart.} Ah!!! How true is that.. even if you try the hardest to ignore them, you simple can't.. they are like your shadow..always telling you what's wrong what's right even when they are not physically present..

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6e-NJpU8Sa4[/YOUTUBE]

In today's rat race of society with parent's and children's timetables colliding, the jostling of priorities as time slips through the gulfs. We live out our lives like strangers in motels. Shilpa Aunty despite being a single working parent is a permanent fixture in Mayank's life. Like the Sun, Moon and Seasons, she is always present for his awakening and sleeping; his going and returning; his consistency and his changing. Applause to Shilpa Aunty and to my working mother too...

The pull of the tides into the cruel and vast sea.

I love the ironic movements that move through both these scenes. The actual opposing the literal. In Mayank's going away scene first Shilpa Aunty and Nupur being the 'actual' whereas in the returning scene Mayank unwittingly becomes the 'actual' opposing the incongruous literal.

'Kabse ye alarm bhajra ha hai." However not for the one who set it.

'Fursat mil jaigi.' As if that free time won't feel like a burden without Mayank.As if!!!!

'Sab kuch apni jagga hai' Including Shilpa Aunty!

She implies that without her presence her mother's work has already been fulfilled. However only by her taking her seat at the table she finds her correct place for her son's loving note.

"Mujhe toh lagta hai ke is ladke ko mujhe bhi zarurat bhi nahin hai." She knows as well as Mayank, as I have said before, they depend upon each other like that perfectly balanced seesaw; without the other not only would they lack purpose in their life but they would be broken.

I don't understand sometimes why mothers have to be so dramatic.. but then shilpa aunty taught me why? its their way of having fun while doing the most difficult job of their life.."Raising their children and instilling in them - good character"

"Kab bhi toh kuch kam ghalat kiya karo!...Hey bhagwan iske mahdat ki jiye!"

As the sun, the moon, and seasons know that life's perfection depends upon them maintaining their duty but life's beauty depends upon their unpredictable phenomenon such as 'the Butterfly Effect' or 'the Coriolis Effect'; then the piece de resistance in the pinnacle of the movement "Yeh Iccha bhi puri ho jaigi!...Jab Nupur meri saath jaigi, tab sab kuch perfect ho sachta hai, kya?"

"Ke jo problem meri saath jaari hai, uska solution mein pehle se dhondkar rakh ko"

He was the lone solution in need of 'his' problem. Can't agree more

Ending with that last ironic twist "Wo apni sapno ki duniyo mein ab tak koi ho gi" Underestimating her again, for he implies she is lost in her thoughts when in fact she is lost in her dreams.

My heart too sinks at the thought of leaving behind the light of Shilpa Aunty but as a farewell comfort we are honoured with that gracefulness of Arjun and Vaishnavi, as Mayank harmoniously feeds her that sliced apple. Apple.. ha! thats my fav fruit... anyways not relevant.. All i wanna say is that i loved this scene...

The push of tides towards home.

The elbowing between Mayank's honesty and Shilpa Aunty's incredulity. As constant as the setting of the constellations, she is there to welcome him but notes than indeed the season has changed. The missing assonance in his euphony replaced by the dissonance, cognitive as it may be, does not go unnoticed by Shilpa Aunty.

That mouth opened in disbelief, (as they say, 'cuteness personified!'), not only at the rendition of narratives but that they justifiably 'make sense' to Mayank; the blatant actual staring both him and Shilpa Aunty at eye level opposed to the ludicrousness of Mayank's willful literalness; he sits upon his bed, wrapped up warm for a long cold winter whilst Spring's rain beats down around him!

"waise mein, baal ke khal toh nikalna chahti, lekin..." Shilpa Aunty's gracefulness permeates the pun and flows through into irony; the ebb and flow of actual and literal continues on in her tones. Mayank aptly looks as vulnerable as those rocks on those shores which the tides crash down upon.

Then my top Shilpa Aunty moment! "Bas, bas, bas! mere young kaan, itnay adult details nahin sun sakhte!" 🤣

Despite the sudden, but most desired changing of seasons, we find that the pith of the earth remains the same, "Bhalo ko mat chuo!" Aww Sabah.. Very very well said.. I dunno what more to say.. i always find myself at loss of words whenever i read your steps.. i am going to store all this in my comp for future(its still toooooooo early..nevertheless, no sane would like to miss these wondeful words of wisdom.)

And i am kinda going to bother you by replying to all the steps now.. Sorry!!

Love,

akansha