Chapter 1
Abhi stood there paralyzed in shock, as the phone dropped from his hand. He staggered at the rib shattering news, while the event manager tugged at his elbow telling him it's time he went on to the stage to perform. Abhi felt immobilized and had no idea how to react to this shock. Hadn't things just sorted for him in life? Chashmish was found guilty in the MMS scandal, and that had reduced his guilt of throwing her out of his life so unceremoniously. True daadi didn't believe it but she didn't resist as strongly when Abhi asked for a divorce. Tanu and Aaliya were very happy at the progress and in fact wasn't it today morning when Aaliya got his lawyer to deliver the divorce deed at his? He had already signed it - tomorrow he was going to send the same to chashmish. But chashmish -----?
On not being able to bring out an answer from him, the event manager summoned Aakash. Aakash took the phone and called back on the same number. It was Purab's call. Purab informed Aakash that Pragya had met with a very severe accident on Pune highway and has been admitted in a hospital in Pune. All her family had left for Pune, but it might be too late by when they would arrive. Since Abhi was already in Pune for the concert, Purab wanted him to reach the hospital and sign whatever documents required to at least start the treatment, which was otherwise withheld because it was an accident case.
Abhi was still paralysed in shock as a strange memory from the fleeting distant past came to him - Even if I knew you were dying chashmish, I wouldn't come to save you!
After Aakash shaking Abhi to break his trance, Abhi jerked back to reality. There was not a moment to lose. True he had said that, but he knew he never meant that, and as destiny would have it, indeed Pragya was dying and he was the only one who could help - the choice remained with him, to save her or not.
There was no choice really, he was already near the parking lot - he had explained to the sponsor that his wife had met with an accident - lucky the news of their divorce was not out in public, then leaving a show for his wife's accident wouldn't have been an easy task. As he reached his car, Tanu caught up with him from behind.
Tanu - Abhi what the hell is wrong with you? I was screaming my lung out calling for you and you were blissfully ignoring me?
Abhi - Tanu, chashmish...she has had an accident here in Pune. Purab says she is very serious, I got to rush
Tanu - Abhi seriously? How is it your problem anymore? You have signed the divorce deed already didn't you? Let the behenji's family take care of this, why spoil your concert for it?
Abhi stared incredulously at Tanu, for the first time he noticed the monster she was. But this wasn't the right time to retort. He gave one last dirty look at Tanu and hopped on to the car and drove.
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By the time he had reached the hospital, he had considerably calmed down and had regained his hold over his nerves. Then he entered the emergency room where chashmish was kept, so he could identify her and sign in the documents elementary for the treatment procedure to begin. It was when he saw her that Abhi really felt fear. A cold shiver ran down his spine as he stared horrified at the bloody, broken, almost lifeless, pale - what looked like corpse - form of chashmish lying limp on the bed. A gasp of horror escaped his lip. "chashmish" he softly uttered as, after the shock his eyes started registering the details that lay before him.
Chashmish was wearing what looked like the remains of a blood soaked blue anarkali suit, with a hospital cover hiding her upto her lower torso. Her right hand was resting at an odd angle on the bed. Her head was tilted towards Abhi, and he could see a deep dark line of head injury starting from the part of the skull covered by her hair, up till her front temple. It was still bleeding. In fact she was bleeding from everywhere he could set his eyes on, there was dried blood running from her nose, ears and even mouth. There were innumerable scratches all across every visible portion of her skin. And if that was not horrible enough, he just noticed a small piece of broken glass still stuck at the nape of her neck below the cheek.
Abhi couldn't believe what he was seeing, he took a few steps back only to collide with the door. Chashmish - always so fragile, delicate and dimunitive - how would she battle these injuries? It was a miracle she made it to the hospital alive. As Abhi signed all documents on behalf of his wife, he found himself continuously praying to the God he never believed in, or prayed to, since the time his parents had met with a similar fate - Please give her strength to fight back, please save chashmish. I am sorry for all the wrongs that I have done, and all that I haven't done - the ones she holds me responsible for. I forgive her for every wrong she has done to me. Please make her fight, give her back her life - please give her back what you didn't give my mother and father - I don't have what it takes to hold the memory of another bloodly corpse of a close one, haunt me every night - Please God, save chashmish.
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When Purab, and the rest of Pragya's family members arrived, Abhi found himself telling them what he learned - how a load carrying goods truck had hit Pragya's cab from behind, how the cab toppled over and rolled off the side of the highway.
In all this he never mentioned the state he saw chashmish in - her naked injuries seemed like something Abhi wanted to hide from the world - they made her vulnerable before others it seemed to him - and she was only vulnerable before him, no one else. He found himself consoling his rockstar daadi and Sarla ma constantly telling them chashmish would be fine - there was a certain conviction in his voice that amazed his own self - especially after seeing how injured she was, he didn't think he could face her family when they arrived - but here he was speaking gibberish in such a confident way that even he himself started believing it that his chashmish would be fine.
Pragya needed immediate multiple surgeries. And Abhi had already taken care of all the documents and the costs. He was sitting outside the OT for the sixth hour now - still no response from the doctor - he consoled himself saying, at least she was fighting and no news here was in a way good news. While he was sitting there hiding his head in his palm and trying to reassure himself, he felt a soft palm on his shoulder. He looked up and was very startled to find a radiantly smiling chashmish look back at him.
Abhi - Chashmish? Aren't you being treated inside? And how on earth do you look so healthy and beautifu----
Abhi shut his mouth. What on earth was he saying? However Pragya blushed a little.
Pragya - Yes, Abhi, I am being treated inside, but why does that mean I cant be here? And I am looking beautiful huh? I guess you can complete your word, no one is going to hear you here. And who knows? Maybe this is your last chance to compliment me?
Abhi - What do you mean last chance? I am not leaving anywhere without you!
Pragya - Who knows, then maybe I will leave you!
Abhi - Ae chashmish, please don't say that. I know whatever we shared wasn't the best one can offer but-----
Pragya - Still whatever we shared' - it is high time you accept the relationship we were in Abhi. We were man and wife - call it that, respect it while it lasts.
Abhi shook his head. This outright blunt and open chashmish captivated him. Was she always like this? Then why was she different before him. Maybe he never let her truly be who she was before him, implored Abhi.
Abhi - We are married, not were. Not yet. And on second thoughts, I am not sure if that ever will be were'.
Pragya - Ah, there are other ways of becoming were' without having to go through a divorce. I just want you to know, I forgive you for every wrong you have done to me - and I do so with the knowledge that at heart you are an amazing human being and I love you with all my heart for that.
Abhi held his breath, chashmish loved him? In spite of what he did to her? But weren't they separating because she was found in a compromising state with that double battery?
Abhi - But chashmish, why are you ----
But Pragya's smile faltered. She seemed to be slightly uncomfortable, so she cut him mid-sentence and spoke in a rushed voice.
Pragya - Listen Abhi, I don't have more time, but I need to tell you this before leaving- Trust your daadi's judgement even in the future Abhi, she truly knows what is best for you - she knows it better than you know it yourself. And never again cheat on her the way you did with this marriage. And take care of yourself.
Having said that, chashmish was speeding away from him - he called her.
Abhi - Oi kishmish! How were you here and inside the OT at once? Is this happening in my head? Is this untrue?
Pragya turned her head toward Abhi while walking away and responded - Yes rockstar! This is happening inside your head, but why does it have to be untrue because of that.
And then she vanished into thin air as Abhi jerked awake on his chair.
Chapter 2
He just knew it, something was wrong. That dream he had some ten minutes back, it couldn't be a figment of his imagination, it was a sign - chashmish wanted to convey something. Is she losing the battle? No that couldn't be. He couldn't imagine a world where chashmish didn't exist. True he never told her that, but now that he felt the sting of her probable absence from his life - he realized how much she meant to him. When did this happen? And she loved him? No he couldn't let her go, not now, when for the first time his heart had cleared her off all charges and he knew she loved him. He needed one chance to make her feel the way she had the right to - a well-loved person in his life, if not as a wife, at least as a friend. He owed chashmish that - she couldn't leave him without settling that account - he begged for a chance.
BB noticed the sudden discomfort on Abhi's face. The fury bottled inside her was intensified manifold at this. She held him responsible for her sister's fate. Had he not thrown her out so unceremoniously, her sister wouldn't have lost faith in love and honesty and justice. She would not have wanted to leave Mumbai and start life afresh in a place where there were less chances of encountering Abhi. Had she not gone this wouldn't have happened. A part of her wanted to go and place a tight slap across his cheek - what right did he have to play havoc with her di's life? But she held herself back when she remembered it was he who had reached here before anyone else to sign the papers - that saved her di. In obligation she restrained herself. True Abhi probably had come because his being in the city but not coming for his wife could hit the headlines in a very negative way and hamper his image - but selfish or not the reason was, it saved her di's life. But she couldn't sit here and see her sister's culprit frown at everything. First he dozed off - as if anyone at this hour in this tension could, and now when awake he was probably cursing the doctors for taking time and getting him late. No there were no place for disinterested fake well-wishers here. If he didn't want to be here, he could go, and she would see to it that he left, thought BB as she approached him.
Abhi looked up to see an extremely disturbed BB trying very hard to pull off a polite smile at him.
BB - Abhi, thanks for all that you have done here. If we knew anyone else present in Pune today, we wouldn't have called you for help. I know you left your concert without performing, thank you for doing so much for us. But we will not want to waste your precious time anymore. You can go back and rest, we will manage it from here. Oh, and I came to know you have paid for the surgery here? Don't worry Abhi, we will find out from the hospital, the exact amount and transfer it to your account.
Abhi stared at BB. To begin with, why was she calling him by his name? Didn't she refer to him as jiju'? And wasting his precious time? His wife was in the hospital battling her life - this was time waste she thought for Abhi? And return back the money? Why would they owe him the money for treating his own wife? But as he thought, it all started to make sense. Even BB's disgusted look. So that is how distant his chashmish was from him - BB won't even call him jiju and wouldn't even hold him liable or responsible for her well-being. Anger boiled inside him.
Abhi - BB, I don't think sitting here is a waste of time especially when the person being treated inside is my own wife. And as for the cost, I don't think anyone is more liable to meet it more than her husband.
Before BB could come up with a response, Sarla ma intervened and asked BB to keep quiet. At that moment her Pragya needed prayers and more the people to pray, the better. Abhi smiled at Sarla ma and internally thanked her for understanding - but Sarla ma didn't stop there, she continued that she didn't care if the prayers were coming due to peoples love for Pragya or their own guilty conscience, but as long as they were good wishes, they were welcome.
From her indifferent tone, he realized how much pain he had inflicted on the one person who was like a mother to him, and thought of him as no less than her son. But all this could wait, he was getting more and more impatient for Pragya as he started pacing up and down the corridor. Purab saw this and came to him to console.
Purab - Bhai, please don't take offence in what BB or auntyji said, you know their state of mind right now nah? I am sure when Pragya di gets better, they will----
Abhi - It's not that Purab, it's just that, I have a feeling and I don't know how I have it - but I feel something is not right, chashmish is not okay, she needs me, she----
But he couldn't continue, as a nurse came out in a hurry from the OT. The nurse informed them that the patient was losing a lot of blood and immediately needed transfusion, but unfortunately there wasn't enough blood back up in their blood bank. The blood needed to be arranged for fast as the patient inside was sinking.
Before anybody could think of anything to respond Abhi reacted like a bolt of lightning, it was as if his body was pacing up all day to do this, his mouth formed words his brain didn't run through. He jumped on his feet saying he would donate the blood and he knew that is what she needed. Everybody stared at him. Soon it turned out Abhi's blood group was that of the universal donors, and Pragya's was of the universal recipient. Since they didn't have time, the doctors decided on a direct transfusion and hence Abhi was taken inside.
He saw her again, this time in an operation gown, lying unconscious on the table. Tears leaked down his eyes, both in misery and in fright. He went close to her and whispered in her ears, still reeking of dried blood, "Please chashmish don't leave me, I promise to return you all your happiness, and every act of care that you have showered upon me. I am so sorry chashmish, I am so sorry."
Throughout the time he was inside he kept shifting his gaze between the lifeline monitor and her face. In spite of the wreck he saw there he felt he had found an anecdote to end all this. It was like chashmish was giving him a message. So when he walked out of the OT, the first thing he did was, call up daadi and inform her to destroy his and Pragya's divorce deed. He couldn't give her a divorce right now. He needed to fix this with her and then mutually convince both their families and then take a divorce - that way they could be friends throughout. If Abhi couldn't love her, he could at least respect her feelings for him.
Aakash and Purab witnessed this from faraway, and after hours they cracked a smile, "He knew exactly when she needed him even before it was informed to us by the nurse, and he claims he doesn't love her. Hah."
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It has been two days since the operation, since the time the doctor had come out and said, it was sheer miracle that such a frail lady could survive the trauma, injury and also this operation. He had said that their prayers were answered and Mrs. Mehra had made it - but - the injury on her head was severe, and there was a lot of internal bleeding especially near the memory node. So it was likely that she may have issues in remembering things from time to time - as to how serious it was, it could only be said when she woke up, which wasn't likely in another 48 hours.
As Abhi freshened up to leave for the hospital, his daadi who had travelled to Pune in these days, held his hand. She told him she was proud of him seeing his dedication towards her bahu. He hadn't slept in the hotel in the last two days, he was constantly in the hospital waiting by the ICU, if in case she needed something. He would only come back to the hotel to freshen up and change to fresh clothes. Today morning Purab had bullied him to return to the hotel and take some rest citing that- Pragya was due to wake up sometime today, and once she did, Abhi would constantly need to be by her side.
After the entire mornings rest, Abhi was hurrying for the hospital now, an unknown anxiety raging inside him - He didn't know how he was going to face her. Those hurt, weakened eyes, looking at him - he realized he was never in her conscious presence after learning the fact that she loved him - he didn't know if he would be able to ignore it now, at least until he apologized.
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Abhi sat at the doctor's chamber paralyzed in shock a third time this week. What he told him, made his life come to a standstill. Of all the things that could have gone wrong to punish him off his deeds, it was this? Okay maybe he deserved it, but chashmish? She didn't deserve this punishment.
When he came out, a worried group of family member - BB, Purab, Aakash, Sarla Ma and the daadis' hurled around him to know what the doctor had said. Abhi didn't have it in him to tell them and bear to see the shock on their faces. He pulled Purab to one side a little far from the crowd, yes he would tell him - Purab could tell all he breathed - The lump in his throat wouldn't let him talk before all these anxious family members and witness their distress once they knew.
Purab - What happened bhai? Anything serious?
Abhi - Purab...Purab it's chasmish. The deep injury on her head? It has caused her a severe form of amnesia. Good part is, thankfully she hasn't lost her memories, but she has forgotten them. She believes she is Ms. Pragya Arora, engaged to Prof. Suresh Shrivastav!
Edited by aafrah - 10 years ago
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Aami Daakini
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