Originally posted by: rock&roll
Interesting post and good question.My two cents
I believe that passion is important for a relationship but is not a necessity.There are enough and more relationships that I know of where there isn't much passion,but the relationship is going very strong.This is because some spouses are passionate by nature and some are not..I hope u get what I mean😉..And then there are many spouses where the man feels the passion and the woman does not and some spouses where it is vice versa.
Much as we think that passion is created by a physical feeling we are wrong.Science tells us that the feeling of passion for someone starts with the release of chemicals from the brain. And there are some basic criteria for these chemicals to be released . Having a handsome spouse is not one of these criteria.Firstly ,for a person to feel passion,he/she should have a free and relaxed mind completely devoid of stress and worries.This explains why increasing work stress reduces the passion in relationships.Secondly passion is created through a feeling of mutual trust,love ,commitment , comfort and security.This feeling increases with age.I mean,in youngsters passion could get kindled (temporarily) by a physical need but as people become older and mature the emotional comfort and feel is what induces passion.The third and most important driver of passion is the feeling that the other person has the same passion for you...So passion fuels passion...😳
Dev and Sona are nowhere near feeling any passion and I completely understand that.I would be surprised if they had gotten physical.Reason is that they were never shown as "can't keep their hands off each couple" from the start.These are not fundamentally passionate(believe me there are many many people like that).Secondly ,both are still terribly stressed. Sona wants to help Dev set his past right and Dev is not forthcoming with it.Sona also wants to make peace with her past.They have just started feeling baby emotions of love but are still very unsure of how capable they are of handling it.Remember,Sona asking her mom if she was making herself vulnerable again by falling in love?See how hesitant Dev is with every step,be it holding her hand or calling her Mrs Dixit?Dev is paranoid about the idea that one wrong move of his might drive her away.So their minds are still in turmoil.They have to settle down.
I also believe that she is right when she says that he is not complete without his family and can't move on.In his euphoria of having won Sona back,Dev is blind to everything else.But he is basically a family man.A few years down the line when he is well settled with Sona,he will regret his behaviour towards his sisters.Who knows,he might even blame Sona for it.(Many spouses do this).Secondly Dev has a tendency to fall into guilt traps very easily.His current behaviour about the last 7 years is an example.All he needs is a small trigger and he will go spiralling downwards...If this happens later,it will take tremendous energy to pull him back from the abyss..And then,.Sona is also a difficult person to get passionate with.Her confidence and self control can scare men off.It certainly scares Dev. Finally ,as is Sona's nature,she wants other things to be perfect(family etc) before she can feel any passion.
As they say,passion is like a switch for a man,all u have to do is turn it on and he becomes passionate.For women to get passionate,the laundry has to be done,the house swept,the vessels cleaned , the candles in their place ,the curtains drawn right and the flowers should be the right type and shade.😉..Sona is this kinda women..If GKB's keys are on her mind,she won't respond..whatever Dev does😆😆..So as they say,the best foreplay begins with the husband doing the dishes...😉..That is what Dev is doing..Letting her handle her issues her way...
Poor Dev Dixit is walking on ice..he is afraid...ek galat move and Sona will go bye bye 😲...phir passion gaya tel lene..😆😆😆
Sorry this became more two hundred cents..not two cents🤣
the one in green cracked me up. to answer your questions, not all couples are like cannot keep our hands off each other and also not necessarily passionate. to them the other emotions take a forward stance, while passion is left within the four walls of their bedroom and only when they are their playful best. like you pointed out , at this time both of them are still finding themselves. they do feel the elements of passion in their relationship, but are cautions and stumbling to express it. dev knows he still effects her the same way when they were in the intial days of courtship where the families did not know about them,yet he is wary of displaying it.
right now, its time for sona to come out of her shell, put her thoughts/feeling into action. like how he waited for her to take the first step even to hold hands he is eagerly waiting for her to take the lead.