*Season 2, Week 13* Analysis Thread - Page 34

Originally posted by: Snehavinaya

I am really tired of all this.
Tired of this Jatin puraan .
He is perfect. Dev is not .
We get it. Is it necessary to show in all episodes?
Now , I don't want to see a jealous Dev all the time.
If Jatin is going to be around for longer period of time, then I would want a girl for Dev also.
Let us see how sona handles that ?
All the decent & perfect men are behind sonakshi?
We want an understanding girl for Dev also.
She can be the new PA / intern in his company.
She comes to know about their story.
She slowly falls for this guy with a golden heart.
She wants to help him out.
In everything- she listens to him ; empathize with him.
Slowly he also should fall for this girl-
Who is very simple, not headstrong, patient- who will compliment Dev 's personality.
Invariably soha also likes this bubbly girl.
Sorry to say , I am not liking this arrogant nature of sona.
She really treats Dev as dirt.
She knows he gets jealous.
She probably enjoys that. Unfortunately that Jatin couldn't bring out this aspect of sona.
Why Dev is always on the losing end?
This time for sure , he won't go behind her.
He will let her go.
Sona can again continue to be confused regarding what she wants to do with her life.
She had always thus sir of arrogance in her - except the lovey- dovey period.
Most of men can't stand these type of girls.
Sorry, don't bash me.
Humility is needed for both men & women.
Sorry for my rant.
Couldn't see tears in Dev"s eyes .

Originally posted by: dreamy.tiara

Well, in the first episode, when Dev-Ishwari are driving to Ishwari Niwas for the first time, Ishwari mentions how proud his dad would have been had he been alive. On the face of it, she doesn't talk much about her late husband, but in the background I feel she does miss his presence too much and she had been missing him all her life. Perhaps Dev is a lot like his dad to Ishwari and she silently cherishes this fact by herself (Similar parallels could be drawn for Suhana and Sonakshi; Suhana and Dev). Maybe that is why she is still so insecure to lose Dev, she can't face the loss again. For his family, Dev has fulfilled all the responsibilities that is expected of a father. This makes Ishwari more emotionally dependent on him and needy of his support.

Originally posted by: deepsel

First things first ... Khatri is back (Grace join me😆).

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

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That's because they do still need each other. Sona's ideal of love is enough to get her by, but not enough to give her happiness. She needs the exhilirating, frustrating, confusing reality of Dev's love. Similarly, Dev can get all the physical/emotional companionship and support he wants, but without a hint of Sona's idealism, he won't feel that transcendental love that lifts him out of his cynicism for the world and makes him dream again. In the end, they need to acknowledge trust comes not from love, but from communication. It's not as romantic, but the romance is never the part they had a problem with!

Originally posted by: agreatperhaps

Dev needs to be a bit mature

He is doing what his mother did since the beginning, and we know how it turned out. Children may need parental attention but sometimes, it is necessary for them to be on their own as well. He cannot cover the 6 years of Soha's childhood by playing with her all the time. He needs to be strict, he needs to say no, he needs to give her space.

This is something fundamentally lacking in the Dixit's. You cannot keep a child inside your embrace and say you are protecting them. That indeed is harmful, smothering and in a way destructive. The child doesn't see their own identity as an individual and would always be associated with the parent. Eg: Dev. He does not have an individuality, he is labelled with his mother. It is not bad, but it is psychologically damning. What about the child's self identity, self ideology, self interest?

The fact that he can't stay away from Sohana is a bit too far fetched. The kid needs to be on her own as well. He cannot substitute 6 years but spending 24 hours with her. It is not right. Dev himself was used to such an environment and I don't see him as an evolved individual. He is the stereotypical , chauvinistic, misogynistic, sexist man. I am not saying he should not stand for his mother or love his daughter. But he needs to draw a line. The line is a dot for him. He has problems with Sonakshi's success, her independence and that is WRONG. He does not have a right to question her parenting. Constant presence is not love. That is smothering. But at the same time, he has been used to this idea because of his mother so one cannot solely blame him.

Secondly, Bose family has been more open and welcoming of Dev. He really does not have anything to complain about. This whole my house my rules has been taken too far fetched. Dev did not require to constantly justify himself in front of the Bose family, he had it easy. If he were a better person he should have been handling the situation.

The one week alternating is not a long time solution and it will mess things up for sure.

Sonakshi and Dev have moved to far and apart and if the serial wants to keep some sanity, they should not get back together. They share a mutually destructive relationship which is unhealthy. It is high time divorce is handled in a true spirit and not in a melodramatic and romantic way. We have to come out of the old regime. (A strong word but it does make sense)

Originally posted by: ltelidevara

Originally posted by ltelidevara

I beg pardon I could not understand why Sam said that Dev lacks faith in Sona's love and hence tells lies with the fear of her leaving him . Dev as per my knowledge never have doubts regarding Sona's love for him.Even during Ritwick's time he thinks she is deceiving herself. He is scared only at the time of infertility issue. He knew Sona will walk out to enable him have his own children and the reason Ofcourse is her immense love for him. On the contrary Sonakshi lacked faith in his love because of Iswari's prominence in his life.

Sam's reply.

This a common answer to both of your doubts, and a little expansion on my thoughts about Sona and Dev's love. I hope it makes sense.

I think that the central issue for Dev and Sona is that they perceived the idea of love very differently. For Sona, it was all about experiencing that pure feeling and acting selflessly for the happiness of your beloved. In her view, love transcended all other feelings, and didn't even require the two people to be together in a worldly sense; she was most invested in keeping the love pure no matter what. This is why she was willing to make a life partner out of Ritwick while feeling that pure love for Dev the rest of her days, and this, I believe, is a big part of why she left. Dev and her marriage tainted their love, making it a far cry from the transcendental experience she had envisioned. She asked herself, how can this be love if Dev and I can't understand each other without words?

For Dev, on the other hand, being in love was all about companionship and physical togetherness -- I don't mean only sexually, but going through life with your beloved by your side. His first priority in love was keeping the object of his love close by his side and enjoying how the relationship with them enriched all other relationships, and life in general. For him, love wasn't fulfilled unless that physical togetherness existed, and in turn cast its warm, strengthening glow on the respective partners' lives. He often says that Sona taught him what love was; this is what she taught him through experience. Because of his love for her and her love for him, he wanted to be a better person, he wanted to have better relationships with his family. That is why when she came to the farm house, he asks her -- how can this be love if it is tearing my family apart?

At their best, these two approaches balanced each other out perfectly. Sona's silent love soothed and healed, and floated Dev out of his burdensome, everyday existence. Dev's demonstrative love made Sona face her fears and step boldly into uncertain territory. When they were in their own comfort zones, neither of them were totally happy. Sona claimed to Elena that it was enough for her just to love Dev and experience that pure emotion, but she was miserable seeing him with Natasha. Dev showed through his actions how much he needed Sona's companionship, long before he confessed, but consciously insisted that he only wanted to do what was right for his family. He was restless until he introspected and gave those feelings a name. They needed each other.

But at their worst, these differences are what sowed the seeds of doubt and doomed their relationship. There is a difference between knowing somebody loves you, and trusting that love. That was what Sona hit upon yesterday. Dev knew that Sona loved him, which is precisely why he was so afraid of telling her about the infertility -- her idea of love was doing anything to make the other person happy, including leaving them to find someone who could fulfill their dreams. Dev's idea of love was being together. He knew that Sona loved him, but he didn't trust that she would love him the way he needed to be loved. Similarly, Sona knew that Dev loved her when he broke up with her the first time, but her idea of love was something transcendental, that beat all odds and couldn't be relinquished at any cost. So the issue once again became that Dev couldn't love her the way she wanted to be loved. And his doubt carried into their marriage, in turn sowing the seeds for her disappointment.

Dev and Sona loved each other, there is no doubt and they even knew the other loved them, but they didn't trust the other to love them in the way they wanted to be loved. Dev's love appears conditional to Sona because he didn't hold it above all other realities as an immutable truth; he answered other calls with equal fervour. Sona's love appears conditional to Dev because she didn't stay by his side and somewhere down the line, stopped giving him that emotional space he craved to make himself a better person. This difference was also reflected in their behaviour during separation and post-reunion. When apart, Sona idealises her love and lives by it, even in tragic form. As I have said before, she kept the space of Soha's father sacred to Dev. When Dev is actually in front of her, she is constantly frustrated by the fluctuating fulfillment and disappointment of this ideal, which is I think what makes her so emotionally on edge. Dev on the other hand, found physical companionship in other women in Sona's absence, but the moment was back in his radius, everyone else faded into the wallpaper.

That's because they do still need each other. Sona's ideal of love is enough to get her by, but not enough to give her happiness. She needs the exhilirating, frustrating, confusing reality of Dev's love. Similarly, Dev can get all the physical/emotional companionship and support he wants, but without a hint of Sona's idealism, he won't feel that transcendental love that lifts him out of his cynicism for the world and makes him dream again. In the end, they need to acknowledge trust comes not from love, but from communication. It's not as romantic, but the romance is never the part they had a problem with!

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Sam

Take a bow. What a wonderful elaborate explanation about the nature of love you gave! I already said I need to read your posts multiple times to grasp the essence of your words. I am immensely pleased to admit how enlightening your posts are in terms of expression,content and clarity. I felt so satisfied reading this especially since it deals with the universal emotion called love.

You helped me understand how Sona's transcendental love differed from Dev's demonstrative love. I always sympathised with Dev for being cheated in love especially I considered his love for Sona as unconditional. I still feel the same but now I am able to understand what did Sona expect or what kind of love she wanted Dev to shower on her. I could feel her frustration and heart break now. Thanks a lot for helping me realise the greatness of Sona's love also.

When a person can experience transcendental love physical togetherness hardly matters.Sonakshi is fully aware of this and spent the seven years feeling her Dev in Soha. Dev despite being ignorant of such love still could spend seven years not away from Sona in his thoughts. They both lived in each other despite living far away from each other.

Recently read the lines of a famous writer " Draupadi's supra physical entity belonged only to Arjun though she physically belonged to five of them. Despite following polyandry she is monogamous in thought and mind." I understood why he said so.

KRPKB stands unique and touched a chord with viewers because it explored the different shades of love like no,other show did. Now I can see the different shades...

Thank you so much for patiently answering my doubts time and again. I wish to have more doubts in your posts so that I,will get your awesome explanations as well.

Regards

Lakshmi