*Season 2, Week 5* Analysis Thread - Page 41

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

@jasw: I think you misunderstand. When we point out Sona's flaws, it doesn't come with inherent censure or expectation. We are simply saying, if Sona had been a little more aware of her flaws and worked on them consciously, it would have really helped their marriage, and the same absolutely applies to Dev. If he had recognised his tendency to to make snap decisions in an effort to keep everyone happy and tried to be more conscious about sticking to his word, it would have done their marriage a world of good.

Left to themlseves, they complemented each other beautifully and brought out what was lacking in the other, but as DQ pointed out, their respective families pulled them apart and highlighted how they were wrong for each other instead of what was right. Now that the break-up has happened, we are merely trying analyse all the factors that went into it, from both sides. Just like we tried to understand where Dev was held back from giving his 100% to this relationship, we are trying to understand what restricted Sona. The past few pages happen to have focused on Sona's struggles, but calling out Sona's contribution to the break up does not absolve Dev or vice versa. It's not a zero-sum game, where one being wrong makes the other right. I hope you can see that that is the common feature in all our discussions here. 😊

Glad you enjoyed my post!

Originally posted by: jasw

Wonderful analysis Sam. Yes, that's Sona's basic nature and we can't change the basic characteristic traits. Can we? So when we are understanding why Dev can't change much, why this unrealistic expectation from Sona?

Absolutely agree with your jhoola and wardrobe comment. She wanted to lessen Dev's dependency on his mother and also mother can't barge in to set his clothes at any random times.😊

Originally posted by: jasw

Interesting idea but I am confused. Are you referring to 3 circle Venn diagram or 2 circle Venn diagram with intersection being IShwari and Bijoy.

If you are referring to latter then ideally the intersection should represent children of circle D(Dev) and circle S(Sona).

If you are referring to 3 circle then it would be better if we talk about 4 circle Venn Diagram, where circle D(Dev) is completely a subset of circle I(Ishwari) and there is some intersection between circle S)Sona and circle B(Bijoy)

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

I am loving the Sonakshi-centric discussion this weekend! 👍🏼

But that is also why when time comes for her to answer to why she hid Soha from Dev, I want Sona to own without hesitation that it was for herself. She made a choice with the information she had at the time. Dev knows her well enough to see through her moral speeches. What is really going to hit him and make him understand is an honest, raw confession that even though she knew hiding Soha was wrong by absolute moral standards, she did it because that is how badly he had hurt her. That is how alienated she felt from him and that is how much she feared he wouldn't see her side of the story.

Originally posted by: jasw

Well I am not a regular member, Sam. This weekend was absolutely free for me so spent quite some time in this forum and thread. When i went thru last few pages, I saw only Sona's action or lack of action being scrutinized, so I gave my perspective. And the fact that hardly any member supported my view rang some alarm bell! 😃

I am sure if I stick around and see more posts, the balance in discussion would be visible. 😊

The last episode when Dev was looking at the Boses, seeing the happy environment and smiled, it reminded me of Neha. She once said that she always used to watch others being happy from a distance as if she and happiness will never go hand in hand. She was the neglected child whereas Dev was the one whom Ishwari indulged on. But both ended up looking at others happiness wistfully. For Neha her deprived childhood taught her, that she has to work herself for her happiness and she has always been vocal about what she wants. Now Dev have finally accepted some of her ways. His call to Elena and asking her to do what she wants without waiting for anyone's permission, telling her she has every right to be happy with her family was refreshing to watch. He wants to complete their family the way he had seen, when he was there with them. So will he be able to get back his family in return?

Originally posted by: deepsel

And finally DQ for your GM question, my answer is " His pant got tight because his phone "vibrated"!"😆

Originally posted by: Shaavi

Dev never wanted Sonakshi to change. He made that abundantly clear on multiple occasions. It was Sonakshi who wanted to do all that and become the best bahu. Her core need for excellence was what drove her to do that. It was she who asked Dev to support her in this and he actually gave that support whole heartedly.

The main difference between Dev and Sonakshi viewpoint was on the absolute morality and the perfect relationships. Sonakshi had a sense of right and wrong and she could not understand how that right could not be completely right and wrong could not be completely wrong in Dixit house. The best example is the episode where Sonakshi catches GKB stealing from Ishwari red handed, the incident just before Sonakshi's accident. In that scenario while Sonakshi argues that she was taught about right and wrong and wrong is wrong. Dev does not disagree with that, but merely states that he also needs to take other factors into account before calling this wrong. Meaning Dev had to discount maami's action of stealing because he could not forget the gratitude and indebtedness he felt in regards to maamaji.

Dev was heavily supported by his maamaji as his father figure and guide. Even in the recent episode where Vickky's selling of office comes to light, Dev is shown to be angry and loud with Vickky and maami, but the moment maamaji steps in apologizes, he is shown to visibly soften. The feeling of gratitude a person feels for other can be infinite. It is this feeling that Vickky and maami exploited which Dev was aware of, but Sonakshi wasn't. This was because she had never felt that indebted to anyone.

In the episode where Dev wants to gift a flat to Ranveer both Dev and Sonakshi disagree to each other's views. That conversation is very poignant and relevant here(just my pov). Sonakshi asks him to put himself in Ranveer's place and think, while Dev asks her to put herself in his place and think. Here both fail to do so. And this was their main struggle in their relationship. While Dev did not want Sonakshi to change and wanted her only to himself, Sonakshi wanted Dev to change and wanted that ideal relationship which mirrored the family she had known-- Bose family.

Both Dev and Sonakshi failed to communicate these differences effectively with each other.

Hope I made sense in conveying what I wanted to convey. This is just my thoughts and not intended to hurt anyone...
😊 😊

Originally posted by: thedramaqueen

I am referring to a 3 circle Venn. Dev, sona and rest of the world (whxih has Ishwari, bijoy, vicky, Lord Shiva and you and me in it )