Misery Loves Company - Page 4

Originally posted by: thedramaqueen

Thanks for your post Sam... Since you address this to the forum in general some of my points might come across as defensive or aggressive. They aren't meant to be and I will be mindful of what I say and how I say it

I am by and large with @Malvika07, @minnie2308, @LiveLife321 and @ltelidevara on this one

To me, KRPKAB is a love story. It's a journey of a couple whose love will conquer all. Now that sounds clichd and cheesy. Because it is. The title is very clear - Love has all shades. Like I said in one of my posts the couple will conquer all when they speak each other's love language.

I don't understand how TRPs work. This show wouldn't ever get a great viewership and I am sure the makers know that too. Love Stories aren't as much of a hit as something like say sultan which wasn't through and through a love story - It was a sport-drama (just an example).

So coming to our show... I am sure the makers know its never going to be a hit like say Shanti (If anyone recalls the 90s show which had cult following back then). Why? Two reasons - Drama (or the lack of) and uncomfortable topics (that we sometimes dont want to face)

DRAMA - While everyone of these characters are realistic and we see bits of them around us, the overall flow was not dramatic. There was no drama and drama makes shows hit. And I for one am thankful for that. (I used to love Shanti, but am ready for change)

UNCOMFORTABLE TOPICS - Any of you recall Saans from the 90s? Our dad wouldn't even let us watch it and back then there was one TV set in the living room. Why was my otherwise pretty liberal father not letting us teenage girls watch a show on adultery. He found it an uncomfortable topic to be discussed in our home.

KRPKAB is doing the same. Its bringing out the issues that lie within all of us without over dramatising them (they are done so subtly that we dont even realise until after a few episodess what exactly happened there. I congratulate the makers). There are relatives who swing from one side to the other, there are dads who endorse their daughters in front of her in laws, there are mothers who always want to have a piece of their sons, there are wives who are always desperate to make a mark in their new home and there are husbands who love their wives to no end but don't know how to stand up for them without offending the other females in the household. None of them are right or wrong. (Disclaimer: I am in team Devakshi and I strongly believe we will see their bond grow stronger and this fondness will show us how deep love runs). However, each one of them make a section of the viewers uncomfortable. The show is almost a victim of its own success. The show leaves us with questions we sometimes don't want to face.

The loyal viewers totally get what the makers want to show. Their ways are leaving us frustrated... Not because we wanted to see Neha toil in the kitchen while Devakshi honeymoon in Paris... But because we (atleast I) love what the makers have created and don't want it going down the drain. I don't think they are sticking to the original story-line. How can they? I don't think they had a script for 200+ episodes when they started. All they had was an idea they wanted to present. This is a living breathing script and can be moulded as they wish or based on the feedback they get. Annnd... therein lies my anxiety - I 100% agree with you, the core factor here is fear (I called them sehemi sonakshi, darpok Dev and Insecure Ishwari about 2 months or so ago). Now, this fear can either be dealt with (and I know it takes time. The trouble is its going round and round in a downward spiral.. I am waiting with abated breath for the uplift) or this show can end with lots of open questions for us viewers to mull over.

I am sorry, but while it is about misery.. Misery of the daughter in law, son, son in law, mother, mother in law ... I don't think that is the crux of the show. The crux (atleast for me) was a modern love story and I wish the makers keep showing modern situations and solutions in the show.

Originally posted by: dsr11

Good take but I find it self contradictory. In the beginning you said that fiction need not teach any lessons and in the same breath you are saying that this show depicts how we should empathize with these unsympathetic women because they themselves are suffering in patriarchal setup.

Just because something is a norm in the society, we should not try to empathize with it. Taking bribes is a common thing in today's world and many people who do so have great many reasons for it, but my dad never encouraged it though he was in a position to earn benefits from that practice. He would work overtime when he needed more money for our education, but never took bribes. By example, he ingrained that mindset in his kids. In turn I pass those values on to my kids. That's how we make the world a better place for the next generation. My dad was proud to be principled and he would tell us stories of how one of his colleagues, who took bribes and gave away money as generously (probably to soothe his conscience), couldn't bribe the karma. I am proud of my dad and rightfully so. There are many other matters where we have a difference of opinion, but he gave us the right values.

Here is a different story of my dad and this is not a very positive one, but it did teach me something very important. My mom used to co-own a poultry farm with one of her acquaintances, she would provide finances and the partner would provide technical expertise. My dad also used to oversee as he always had this curiosity to learn new things. When he learnt that the partner's way of dealing with a disease outbreak is to throw all the diseased birds in the incinerator live, his sympathetic heart couldn't bear it. It is cruel but that's the practice that works in farm conditions. He meddled with the regular procedure and told the partner not to kill the birds like that, but to put them in a separate shed, where my dad would administer his homeopathic medicines to these birds and nurse them back to health. He did cure one or two birds, but the disease spread to other healthy birds even after separation and a lot more birds died than normal. My mom lost her money and left the business, but my dad did not learn his lesson. He still argues that he is right. But I learnt an important lesson that it's good to be sympathetic, but its never good to not see the greater good.

What I mean to say is that we should definitely understand what goes on in the minds of those women in patriarchal setup, but we should never entangle our lives with them. Because it's more important to provide healthy environment for the next generation than trying to understand and empathize with the previous generation. If the current generation tries to understand and change the older generation, they themselves will be drawn into the cycle and pass it on to the next generation. The older generation are very set in their ways and they will never change. The best way to deal with them is to set boundaries and keep them away. By all means be sympathetic to their basic needs, but don't let them feed on your psyche because of their own psychological imbalances.

I agree with what @Malavika07 says regarding the character of Dev. Managerial skills are same for both professional life and private life. I can understand his practice of delegating certain chores to his secretary at office and his mother at home, but there are other key things that are going wrong with the character(or lack of it). He took decisions on his own, taking into account Neha's wishes, without discussing with his mother, during her first alliance(which is not related to his profession), but now suddenly he lacks any brain and his mother tells him what to do and what not to. He is acting like an elementary school kid literally, making puppy faces and not being able to keep promises. That's totally not sexy for a male lead of a soap aimed at an age group of 30-40. This show and Dev's character made sense to me only until the deewangi phase. Ever since they suddenly changed track and rushed into marriage track, bringing in that dadibua from some other regressive soap(such a loud character doesn't belong in krpkab), justifying eeshwari through that character, the show went downhill in terms of creativity. Trps may have increased recently(for all Sony shows), because of their appearance in Kapil Sharma show, but that doesn't hide the fact that content is below par.

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

Please do see my response to Malvika above. 😊

Thank you for the reference Sam. I must say you surely have a different & unique perspective towards this show. I completely respect your pov but at the same time i differ with you on some points. 😊

For ex, As you said Dev went wrong in so many cases while assessing others but he was also dead perfect while assessing people when all other went wrong with their assessments. Even Sona was not right always in this area, in fact no one can assess other person perfectly all the time. My point here is not about whether Dev or Sona were right or wrong while assessing others, what i am trying to say is he had that capability in him which got disappeared from his personality at present magically. I think lets agree to disagree here.😊

I don't think there is a lack of logic or execution. I think it's just the result of being in a place in the story that has no tangible goal in mind. The episodes that lead to something are always the easier ones to write, with pre-confession being the easiest as the romantic tension almost writes itself. Post-marriage, on the other hand, is something that nobody really does well (except for Mani Ratnam) but this show is attempting. If the tracks were sequentially introduced and sorted it would look like " the x steps to winning your MIL's heart," and to me, that would be contrived. Don't get me wrong, I'd still watch it. But the way they are doing it now has me much more confused and overwhelmed... exactly the way Sona, Dev, and Ishwari are feeling, I believe. That is why they are unable to react the way they used to when they were in total control of their lives. I like how immediate that feeling is. I appreciate the lack of instant gratification because it makes me think about how I would navigate these choppy waters and what it means to be married.

As you mentioned above, Lets think that pre-confession was the easiest phase and we all appreciated & respected cv's efforts time & again at that time. I too agree post- marriage is the tough one to handle & as you said MR is pro in that area. 😆 BUT

Isn't it(Post-marriage) the actual theme of this show?

If the build-up(pre-marriage) is a cake walk for creatives then post-marriage track should be even more outstanding comparing to the pre-marriage track since this is what is their actual story. Then why majority is having issues with the logic & execution area?

Their initial promos gave crystal clear message on what we can expect from this show then when they actually entered in to their main plot why many are loosing connect with the show & story?

Honestly speaking, it should be more gripping & connecting at this point right?

Originally posted by: OmNaMaSteOm

thedramaqueen - (I called them sehemi sonakshi, darpok Dev and Insecure Ishwari) 👍🏼

Originally posted by: Malvika07

Loved your response. Once again, very well articulated.

I guess we both have very different ways of looking at Dev's character. And that's not a bad thing. I would consider it a show's success that it has managed to intice dissimilar responses and promote a healthy debate.

I agree with you on the part that Ishwari's upbringing has played a huge part in who he is as a person. That he is an emotionally flawed character is a fact that has been well established. It's just I find it very difficult to come to terms with the fact that even after travelling extensively, being well read, and claiming to know his mother inside out, Dev still failed to notice the red flags. Sona, as you rightly said, has been a mirror to him in more ways than one. It's precisely why I was disappointed when the patch up happened without any retrospection on Dev's part about what exactly went wrong. Even Sona's, for that matter. I am ready to concede that he didn't know about ishwari's insecurities before the break up. But after all that happened after break up, his walk after he found out it was ishwari who sent Ritwik's alliance for Sona, indicated that he could see through her facade. The morning after Sonakshi's engagement that didn't happen, he was worried Ishwari will throw a fit if she finds out he created a scene at her engagement, but the moment she announced that he was to marry Sona, he didn't spare a minute's thought in thinking whether Ishwari's insecurities have truly subsided or why is it that she's suddenly so excited to get him married to Sonakshi. Anyway, I made my peace with this treatment once I saw growth in his character post marriage.

It all went pretty great until after the Diwali episodes. I had complaints, but I was impressed by the genuine growth in his character graph. Ever since the calling asha as aunty issue started, it all went downhill for me. Call it being superficial, but I couldn't take so much misery and negativity on the show. The Devakshi scenes stopped bringing a smile on my face. More and more, I felt that the CVs were running in circles with the track and I couldn't understand why they kept bringing up new plots when the older ones are still unfinished.

I guess we can agree to disagree with regards to this. But I'm genuinely very happy to read your views as it did help me gain a new perspective towards the various characters on this show.

P.S : the part about intentional fallacy was bang on and if that was your intent, kudos on bringing forth a new perspective for all of us here. Cheers!