Is Dev really that Wrong ? or Should Sona change her approach ?

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Vimal M

@VIMAL.SM

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#71

No one other than Sona knows.Dev take sleeping pills.Because he could not sleep properly.Because his mind is preoccupied with many things.He did not have any one to share is sorrow,happiness,doubt etc.,.Sona knew if Dev keep doing this he can go in to depression.That's why she said him to share things.If then also.He does not get proper sleep.They will consult doctor.So Sona asking Dev to share things now also based on his past.She knew he keep things to himself.Which is so bad for his mental health.So only she asked him to share his pain n sorrow.Dev should feel lucky.At least there is some one who understand his pain.Ready to give supporting shoulder.Appreciate his decision.Also ready to share his pain to make him feel light.But what he did he yelled at her.He could have said in calm n composed way.I don't buy this theory.You yell at the person close to you.If U love some one.You will not hurt them in any way.

Honestly I wish Sona leave everything take a break.Go to her house.Concentrate on her work.Enough of trying to help others.When no one deserves her help.

Let first Dev behave like a husband then mama's boy.Then Sona will behave like Wife.

Dev can shout at Sona for taking a decision alone of keeping Virat.Sona cannot get upset on Dev for taking decision alone.If she does it she said to behaving like Ishwari.Why diff rule for Dev N Sona.Only Dev has the right to get upset.Sona is not human.Can't she get upset.One day before his husband says I will suppourt you n the business is ours.Next day she is made to feel an outsider.Husband does not suppourt her.Can't she get upset n question her husband.What's wrong in it.

Edited by VIMAL.M - 8 years ago

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Krishnabhisarik

@Krishnabhisarik

Explorer

Posted: 8 years ago

#72

Originally posted by: dlavanya
I can see Sona is trying to be everywhere and solve all the problems in Dev's life.
The other day when Dev was thinking of making VIcky Sales manager, sona said i should not talk about your company matters... DEv said it is our company and she has right to suggest.
Ultimately it is Dev's decision on who he appoints in what position. Sona can only give her opinion.

Dev understood Sona's POV and he appointed Vicky as trainee... and the whole mahabharat started...
I am glad that Dev stuck to his decision that - it is the right decision and Vicky needs to learn before he can lead ...He even gave Riya's example.

But then the awful and difficult past of Dixit family and how mamaji helped ... when Ishwari reminded him all this ... all of a sudden 1000 lbs has been put on Dev's heart...
The continuous rant that He is ignoring old relationships because of the new ones... Dev is so guilty at this point even if he is not wrong... there is no way out.
When he gets to him room, Sona already knows all about the Mamaji ehsaan and ishwari putting pressure on Dev... at this point ... he asked her to give him some space... she should have listened.. Honestly everyone needs space to think and when the person asks for space -- you just give them that... and then discuss the matter later when things cool down...

Didnt Dev give her time and space when Sona was mad on their first night... so why cant sona do the same and give him the space he asked for ...
Even after he told she wont understand his difficult past... she kept on trying to talk to him again...He lashed at her and left... because she is not getting the point of "given me space"

Had it been a normal family like Sona's and had Dev not seen such a difficult childhood, the logic applies and one can take a sane and logical decision... but when you are under such "ehsaan pressure" and constant rant of " don't ignore old relationships because of new ones"
The state of mind will be completely different...

My suggestion to Sona is to - suggest, help only if asked.

I am saying this not because Sona is the woman and Dev is the man... even if the roles are reversed if one of the partner asks for some time and space then you just give him/her that..what ever discussion you want to have, have it once the person is willing to have a discussion..

Also her conv with vicky... she telling him that she will not let vicky take advantage of Dev's goodness and will not let him harm him --- again please girl how the hell are you going to do this? are you going to Join Dev's company ?? please dont act like a super woman ... you cant solve all the problems... Dev is a big man and he can handle his company on his own... and just be there to morally support your husband incase there are any issues... Please dont take all the problems on to yourself and act like a super woman.

Also in the precap, Sona was questioning him... how he can change his decision with out asking her ... Now why is she trying to turn in to Ishwari... It is Dev's decision let him decide what he wants to do... you can just give your POV and suggestions ... Dev is not insisting that he will help you prepare diet chart for your patients.

All I can see is Sona fighting with an already depressed Dev ... is this how you help your partner ? didnt she say she cant approve all his decisions but will always support him ?? why is she fighting and questioning now ? especially when she knows why Dev had to change his decision ??

Sorry for long rant... but i believe the husband and wife should support each other instead of lashing out on the person who errs with out knowing what they are going thru...

Perfecto!! I felt so bad for Dev and Sona, yes dev needs to be a bit more firm n decisive but this is easy with the outside world and difficult with your family, especially a family like the dixits where emotional blackmail is the first method of 'convincing'... The wife should have been a breath of fresh air, but uspe bhi iss ghar ka asar ho raha hai😆 I guess the precap is just Sona's frustration of being constantly reminded that she is an outsider and not family yet, she must have linked Dev's behaviour to that and blasted on him... Quite human.. Poor souls, they need a break and some healthy dose of maturity..😃

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KamnaSharma

@KamnaSharma

Navigator

Posted: 8 years ago

#73

In many business families they are forced to keep their families in top positions disregarding their qualifications and attitude and aptitude. So Dev is forced to keep Vicki. Whatzwrong is how he yelled at sona. But sona has signed in after knowing Dev and his family. He himself has accepted that his family is v complex and strange. She has witnessed their discussions only highly convoluted minds can stoop to their level. But its scary to live with a woman like Eswari her sturnness is intimidating

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cscs

@cscs

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#74

Just like our cvs, sona also needs to calm down a bit. she is getting over enthusiastic with everything. She is new to the family and needs to learn to manage things slowly. Remember when Ishwari said, Vo hmare tarah nahi sochte hai. Dixits are not ready to listen to any different POV and sona should stop dropping bombs everywhere.

I understand from where she is coming from, yesterday she wanted to talk and let things sorted out. She know dev is being emotionally bullied and wanted to be his strength. Communication is very important for a relationship and so is giving time and space. I know Dev would have been lashed out for his anger on Sona and must be given 1000 new nick names for his rude behaviour, but all he wanted was to just left alone. Its important to leave people alone sometimes. As you mentioned in your post, Dev gave sona the required space she needed on wedding night, the same was required yesterday.

And Dev knows what he is doing. For him relationships are more important than money. He is aware vicky will do mistakes and losses will happen. He cleared it to mamaji, he will manage.

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Cutee999

@Cutee999

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 8 years ago

#75

I think being his life partner she is trying to solve his problems but looking at current conditions she should stay away from such things which can put her into trouble.

For now she should not interfere into his decision.

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randomramblings

@randomramblings

Navigator

Posted: 8 years ago

#76

Originally posted by: Tinkerfairy
wow so no matter what sona should be punching bag .
Why every time Guy's stupid actions should be justified just because he has terrible past 👏👏👏

Desi Television logic

and Girls should not be allowed to have mistakes,or she should always bend in front of her husband 😛

no one is asking Sona to become a punch bag. She herself is venturing into unknown territories without even thinking. Her idea that she needs to be the part of the family is good, but her actions are not. At this point she is like a bird who just learnt to fly and is soaring up in the sky without knowing the potential of her wings.

1. neha incident - after her short stint at ishwari nivas, she should have understood that Neha is a very strong lady with a heavy burden of her bitter childhood. then how on earth can she imagine that neha will come over and have a chat with her. What neha needed the most was her space, there was no need for Sona to take tea for her and then become upset on the fact that neha does not even acknowledge her presence. sona needs to understand just because you feel neha is your nanad , she does not need to feel you as bhabhi and come running to you with open arms.

2. vicky incident - the opening statement of Dev that any experience of vicky can be of no use to them, pretty much sums up his opinion about vicky. even when vicky was taunting Dev to be big man, with a plush house, big car... blah blah blah,,,, dev did not respond. Ishwari already established the fact that the sense of entitlement from Vicky because he is Dev's brother is justified. they had a row and when Dev went to her room,he had a earful.

All he asked Sona was for some alone time. on the first night when sona said she needed space didn't dev back off? then why couldn't she do the same, why does she need Dev to discuss everything under the sun with her. any person will share something only when they feel like sharing. first of all, she does not know what was the conversation Ishwari and Dev had.

he very clearly conveyed that the only way Sona can help him was by leaving him alone for some time. She should have been sensible and left from there. there was no need for her to become the aadarsh wife at that point ...

3. Vicky - doesn't she know that vicky and maami bring in Ishwari as their trump card always?

what was new there? There was no need for her to argue with him, you know his character and very well know that they are going to ruin Dev's reputation and his business. instead of challenging vicky , you better focus your attention on Dev,Dev is going to have a one hell of life ahead as he will not be any position to say anything to vicky due to ishwari.

You want to become his strength,then first build your own strength. Your MIL already gave you a best advise. try to become best in what you already know instead of testing new waters.

GET THIS POINT STRAIGHT into your head Sona. god damn it, its only 5th day of your marriage, and you want EVERY ONE in the family to behave with you as if you are one of them!!!!!!!. Isn't it asking for way too much!!!!

even when we were kids and joined a new school all the 30-40 students of the class would not have become our friends within the first 7 days. and here we are talking about complex individuals who come with their own prejudices, egos and strong opinions.

TIME is the biggest element... there is a time and place for everything. until then no point cribbing.

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srujitha

@Sruji1

Navigator

Posted: 8 years ago

#77

i don't think sona deserve that lash out but i can't blame Dev also. i will share a personal thing. my mom was so close to my grand father when he died, she sit in a corner and crying alone and my Dad went there to console her saying don't worry that he is here he will take care of her. my mom said she is ok he can go but my dad don't want to leave her so he is consoling her more saying don't worry what if your Dad is no More i will take care of you. so my mom lashed out him and pushed him and saying she don't want any one. she wants her father only. is it my father wrong to want to console her ya my mother wrong to shout at him when he just wanted to support her. i know sona dev situation is not that serious but still if a person wants to space we should give it. once they calm down they will come around. we just need to be patience. i will talk about precap once i saw the episode

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Tinkerfairy

@Tinkerfairy

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#78

Originally posted by: randomramblings

no one is asking Sona to become a punch bag. She herself is venturing into unknown territories without even thinking. Her idea that she needs to be the part of the family is good, but her actions are not. At this point she is like a bird who just learnt to fly and is soaring up in the sky without knowing the potential of her wings.

1. neha incident - after her short stint at ishwari nivas, she should have understood that Neha is a very strong lady with a heavy burden of her bitter childhood. then how on earth can she imagine that neha will come over and have a chat with her. What neha needed the most was her space, there was no need for Sona to take tea for her and then become upset on the fact that neha does not even acknowledge her presence. sona needs to understand just because you feel neha is your nanad , she does not need to feel you as bhabhi and come running to you with open arms.

2. vicky incident - the opening statement of Dev that any experience of vicky can be of no use to them, pretty much sums up his opinion about vicky. even when vicky was taunting Dev to be big man, with a plush house, big car... blah blah blah,,,, dev did not respond. Ishwari already established the fact that the sense of entitlement from Vicky because he is Dev's brother is justified. they had a row and when Dev went to her room,he had a earful.
All he asked Sona was for some alone time. on the first night when sona said she needed space didn't dev back off? then why couldn't she do the same, why does she need Dev to discuss everything under the sun with her. any person will share something only when they feel like sharing. first of all, she does not know what was the conversation Ishwari and Dev had.
he very clearly conveyed that the only way Sona can help him was by leaving him alone for some time. She should have been sensible and left from there. there was no need for her to become the aadarsh wife at that point ...

3. Vicky - doesn't she know that vicky and maami bring in Ishwari as their trump card always?
what was new there? There was no need for her to argue with him, you know his character and very well know that they are going to ruin Dev's reputation and his business. instead of challenging vicky , you better focus your attention on Dev,Dev is going to have a one hell of life ahead as he will not be any position to say anything to vicky due to ishwari.

You want to become his strength,then first build your own strength. Your MIL already gave you a best advise. try to become best in what you already know instead of testing new waters.

GET THIS POINT STRAIGHT into your head Sona. god damn it, its only 5th day of your marriage, and you want EVERY ONE in the family to behave with you as if you are one of them!!!!!!!. Isn't it asking for way too much!!!!

even when we were kids and joined a new school all the 30-40 students of the class would not have become our friends within the first 7 days. and here we are talking about complex individuals who come with their own prejudices, egos and strong opinions.

TIME is the biggest element... there is a time and place for everything. until then no point cribbing.

You just proving my point in your all explanation , In this explanation you have said What SONA should do ,Not what DEV also supposed to do.

Tell me about How much you want only Sona to be only understanding one, SHE should do this, SHE should have done that ,Can you blame the girl current scenario as much as I hate CV's for making Sona stupid, For rushing into marriage where her lover boy doesn't make any effort to win her back. .After marriage doesn't seems to stand up for their relationship infront of his family 👏

This what i hate about Indian serial How they always try to justify ML rude behavior just because his past sob story .

While FL always Puts on pedestal ,One Mistake she has done ,every one started blaming her without reasoning about why she's doing it.

Sona is insecure as hell in love because of Dev's mistake only .It was Dev's responsibility to understand her emotions, her feelings ,what state is going through in that suffocated environment.But In end Her husband also asked her to "SHUT UP" made her feel like an OUTSIDER.

Relationship is always goes two way ,She is his wife now. His Equal ,If He doesn't want her opinion ,Why he said to her "HUMARI COMPANY"

I know relationship is not all about being lovey dovey , It takes understanding , efforts and struggle ,compromise to survive.

BUT they don't have any core base for relationship That is TRUST and RESPECT.

Sona doesn't seems to be TRUST Dev(With Valid reason) and DEV doesn't RESPECT their relationship.

They should be each other's best friend ,alas it was only Dev who consider sona his best friend.

Such a Imbalance in a relationship .

Edited by Tinkerfairy - 8 years ago

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randomramblings

@randomramblings

Navigator

Posted: 8 years ago

#79

i am not expecting only sona to be understanding. dev too needs to understand . u r right here.

if we can see dev us trying to understand, she needed space, he gives her that. her brother rejects his first gift, he understands, he even apologises. her reason for keeping vrat, he understands and ends up apologising. nehas incident she asks him to wait he agrees on it. vickys job he accepts her suggestion.

coming to the issue it was never that he listened to sona. infact ishwari makes it clear that he needs to listen to his wife's pov and he can consult her. the point here is returning "a favor" . what ishwari feels as a favor is in reality an entitlement for us. dev rightly said u need to feel it to understand it.

sona is not being aleniated in dixits house . in reality people behave much more ruder than what sona is facing in case if an adverse in law environment .

sona is not aware of the dynamics that make ishwari feel indebted to her brother and dev being her son she expects him to lighten up her burden. sona needs to understand not anything and everything is abt her being accepted as a family.

just like dev cannot become a bose over night similarly she too cannot become a dixit because her surname changed to it.

no point in either lashing out or wallowing in self pity. dont play a game when u dont know what it is all abt.

Edited by randomramblings - 8 years ago

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vandyt1602

@vandyt1602

Explorer

Posted: 8 years ago

#80

Originally posted by: adoremevirgo
i know dev lashing out at sona seemed very wrong apparently...but we hv to see the situation...dev is not at all happy by appointing a callous and irresponsible guy in such a top position...he was emotionally manipulated by his mom...he is also hurt that ishwari has lost trust in him and thinks that he has forgotten past favors of his family...dev is frustrated that he has sacrificed all his life for his family but now his mom is testing his allegiance...and then mamaji comes and tells him y he hired vicky which again frustrated him because of course that is also wat he wants but he cant do...

after all such frustrations and helpless situation his wife comes and offers help and refuses to remain silent even after he repeatedly tells her he needs space to think by himself...the guy has made all his decisions alone all his life regarding his business and has always been successful...today he is being manipulated by his mom to take business decisions against his own wishes...he feels he is being robbed of his right to think by himself...upar se if his wife continuously says talk with me then any guy will react the way he did...
wen a person is already in a foul mood it is not wise to disturb him even if the intention is gud...the argument that they showed between #DevAkshi was so real...this is how couples argue in such tight situations...

so i am very happy that in spite of all trp pressure they r still maintaining the real feel of the show...

That's the most apt analysis of Dev's frustration...he is definitely not happy that his mother has questioned about him ignoring his responsibilities towards his family..

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Is Dev really that Wrong ? or Should Sona change her approach ? - Page 8

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