In defense of Ishwari

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dhank

@dhank

Dazzler

Posted: 8 years ago

#31

agreed👍🏼

I repeat this....😆

when sona said aap itne conservative h??? I was like😲 as if she doesnt know them🤔..they r...she shud ve thought b4 entering this HELL CONFUSED MANSION

Edited by dhank - 8 years ago

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sjain

@sjain

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#32

Oh well your post is a pleasant surprise to me in the forum today actually ..so yeah good job ..

I realized I should be better prepared for the kind of atmosphere forum has and more bitter it will be in future ..and its no one's fault ..you expect something and when you dont get you tend to feel angry and annoyed so yeah..in the middle of all the hustle bustle..1-2 posts like yours in where you feel their are still some viewers who r calm and ready to give everything a chance :)

now back to your post.

Yes no MIL can accept her Son's wife on the day one of their marriage ..she just prepares herself mentally for it.. that yes now I have new relationship in my life too..my son is going to share his life his with a girl now ..I have to share him with someone..but all these r just pre preps ..when in reality you come across it ..the gravity of the situation is realized..when u see new person working in your kitchen when you see a new addition on your dining table..its not just for a DIL but also for the family where she goes needs time to adjust..but here with Ish..the question is whether she WANTS to accept Sona or not..If she will not try then she will never be able to welcome her in her own life or in Dev's life..She has to first accept that Sona has equal right on this house and in DEV's life..as a human we adapt according to the situation..but ye "Adaptation" is not their in Ishwari ATM and ye aana for her is going to be massive task :)

you mentioned interesting point which I too felt ..She never pretended ..she always said "Dev ki khushi" " Dev ki pasand"...it was never " meri khushi ya meri pasand ya meri ichchha".She always mentioned Sona with Dev's reference..she has always been clear about it but Dev Sona nd we fans for a moment felt she is has changed 😆

She never mistreated SOna because she is her son's happiness..she always kept this in her mind and about Bose family..she tried to do things possible for her..haan even non veg thing..infact Bose family precisely Bijoy wa rude and said harsh words..he was stubborn about bengali style wedding..he too didnt respect their culture and showed his anger too ..though mami and bua too insulted bengali culture but I dont count them anywhere ..they r keedey makaudey..not required anywhere basically 😆 Ishwari never forced her culture on Boses surprisingly but Boses did that ..tell me if I am wrong ..yes being mature adults I swear except mamaji ...NONE knew how to respect each other's culture..

Hmm Sona needs to be strong and patient..and rightly u said bua mami type log hotey hain har family mein its just that dont let them affect u ..and u r correct what all you wrote about Dev ..these issues could have been discussed later and not on your suhagraat ..let your love bloom and become stronger to face the tornado that will hit it in future :)

oh Sorry for such a long rant..😳 I had so much with in me ouch

Edited by sjain - 8 years ago

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mayu1982

@mayu1982

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#33

Wow Nisha

Excellent post ..

agree with you completely..

P..S. Want to say more but IF ka problem 😕

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Neha

@Swadhinta07

Dazzler

Posted: 8 years ago

#34

Awesome post ! 👏👏

Loved it

I second each word of yours !!

Even I don't think it's Ish's fault if she doesn't love Sona .. How can one force to love somebody in just a day or two ..

She accepted Dev's choice but it will take some time for her to actually love sona as her DIL !

If sona expects Ish to accept her in a day, she should lower her expectations & see the reality ..

Moreover, Ish behaved really really well throughout the wedding .. Even better than sona's baba

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LiveLife321

@LiveLife321

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#35

A very well written and much needed post dear.😊

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404_NotFound

@404_NotFound

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 8 years ago

#36

Originally posted by: rash2222
your post👏👏👏... all three needs to adjust... these three character entering into new phase and they have to do certain adjustment and live happily... you can't expect ishwari to forget her habits and love for her son in one day... she will realise things have changed and she is most scared of those changes, she will make blunders but then she will learn also...
as for dev stop blaming him for everything that happens with sona... he was not wrong one bit in yesterday's episode... you can't expect him to jump in every discussion in the house and in every fight of sona especially on the very first night of wedding... i am glad he kept quiet otherwise situation would have worsen

Thank you .Agree with you on the highlighted part ...its not worth fighting every battle and there is time for everything . In today's episode he shut everyone's mouth by openly appreciating his wife 👏 .Its rare to find a person who is so appreciative of his spouse .

Originally posted by: ltelidevara
Such a relief to see the post. Agree with every word.
Iswari always said she wanted Sona in Dev's life since he is desparately in love with her. Any mother would do what Iswari did. To let her son have the love of his life as his wife.

But that doesn't mean she started liking Sonakshi.It is not fair even to expect that she will change her mind not from the very first day itself.
Clearly the wedding became a one sided event where Bose family did not feel like checking everything before they implement. Every issue created a problem because of this miscommunication.

Sonakshi doesn't need to fight on top of her voice. She can discuss and sort out issues. But overnight the issues won't be solved. Dev and Sona both should work on with patience.

From the beginning we have seen Sonakshi has temper issues and she is judgmental as well .Just like Ishwari she has a long way to go .She has to learn to handle things diplomatically especially when it comes to relationship .Shouting , taunting and fussing wont help her in any way .

She is just like her father in many ways and she needs to learn from her mom on how to balance relationship .

Originally posted by: SabitaParmar
superb post dear 👏

Thanks dear 😃

Originally posted by: neelima_menon
Excellent post !!

Thank you 😊

Originally posted by: sappushivu
bang on post..i made a similar post too..people neeed time to accept a new member..basically all three of them need to tke their own time to understand each other !

Yup ...al three have to have accept each other and try to understand each other's POV

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404_NotFound

@404_NotFound

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 8 years ago

#37

Originally posted by: --Destiny--
The problem since the beginning has been this. Dev loves her toh it was taken granted Ishwari would love her too. Dev believing strongly on this created the whole mess in phase 1 of their relationship. Ishwari is a MIL. On top on that a possessive mother. She is not a villain. But the woman needs her space to get adjusted to the changes in life in terms of her son. She strongly doesnt accustoms to changes easily. Ishwari needs tons of cajoling to completely accept Sona with Dev by all means in his life. And yes timely dose of Mamaji knocking some sense in her too. I hope Sona understands this and treats the matter smartly. She is the most sensible one in all three. Dev is naive in the whole matter. Almost stupid. He doesn't thinks that deep but he has to get hold of the matter soon and not force Ishwari into changes too fast and forcefully. Also. Okay Sona had a proper reason for outburst, she had it. Thank God Dev was calm with her. But I don't want and like Sona putting him at crossroads in between his mother and her. Ishwari se I have no hope regarding this. But I want Sona to understand this and help Dev rather than making him choose sides. Ek taraf se Sona and ek taraf se Ishwari. If both equally pressurise him. Dev ka kuch hone se raha. So I want Sona to be his strong support. Just like they showed in the initial promos. Men are mostly thickhead in understanding so detailed matter. They mostly take stuff what's told to them. Their head doesn't work that fast on these as a woman's does. So Dev will really need to be shown stuff so he can sense the problem. Spoilers says he is unaware of the tension brewing in between Ishwari and Sona. -___- Dunno what CVs will do. Volcano burst karke bolenge Dev ko bujhane.

Great points 👏.Expectations lead to disappointment .Both Sona and Dev are naive to think a MIL will love her DIL because her son loves her .For me Ishwari was never a villain ,she has some grey shades .She has some great qualities but her possessiveness for her son overshadows everything .She is one interesting character and would like to see her journey from a possessive mother to understanding MIL .

If we watch episode 105 , Ishwari talks about her possessiveness for her son .She knows what she is doing is not right yet she is unable to do the things right way . That was a beautiful scene and the makers need to be appreciated for sketching a character like Ishwari .

Originally posted by: thedramaqueen
I recently joined and this is the reason I joined the group. Just like Bijoy is sulking Ishwari feels the same. Weddings and funerals bring out the best and worst in us.
There is so much potential in this Serial. We arent after loud Buajis telling off Benarsi-saree-clad-bahus.. The same insecurities need to surface more subtly. Just like everything else has so far in this soap.

Bijoy should have called mamaji to apologise for the FISH incident. So what if they caterers did it. It still happened and wasn't acceptable. So what if Dev agreed to meat being served in the menu. Couldn't the bride's side do their shagun discreetly?

Haven't seen the juice vs tea drama. However, its so cliched.

Yup this serial is not just like anyother saas Bahu story we have seen .Each character in this serial has so much depth .

Bijoy is one character i cannot warm upto .He overreacts most of the times and his ego creates problem for everyone .He has unrealistic expectations from the groom's side and his ego will not let him accept his mistake so easily .

Originally posted by: Sutapasima
I completely agree with you dear

Thanks Suta 😊

Edited by yyyy - 8 years ago

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ltelidevara

@ltelidevara

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 8 years ago

#38

Bijoy is one character i cannot warm upto .He overeats most of the times and his ego creates problem for everyone .He has unrealistic expectations from the groom's side and his ego will not let him accept his mistake so easily .

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Totally agree . Yes. He is egoistic to the extent of thinking himself perfect and others faulty. His attitude towards Dikshits is over the top. Sona inherited most of her traits from him. His good fortune ! He has Asha Bose by his side.

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404_NotFound

@404_NotFound

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 8 years ago

#39

Originally posted by: Krpkab_meg

I would like to say that LOVE is a powerful driving force but not always enough. If Sonakshi cannot stand up for herself with Dev then what right does she have to expect it of him?

Well said !! She needs to stand up for herself and Dev will support her .

That said, Yes Sona is falling into the trap and giving in to playing "Dev kiska Jyada hai" game with that Pehli rasoi thing. That is definitely out of character for Sona and NOT what Dev expects of her. She should continue being his friend, confidante and wife baki sab ke liye Mata hai na. I definitely feel that physical intimacy is such an important link to sealing the Husband and Wife bond, that kind of tilts the balance in the wife's favor. Hope Sona realized that sooner than later.

Agree with you on this .

My comments in Blue.I disagree with you on certain points but again it was just a discussion .No offence meant .

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mena_k

@mena_k

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#40

Good post!

Yes, I too don't expect Ishwari to immediately love Sona (though she had this lovey dovey feeling before for Sona when she worked as nutritionist). She did lie to Sona when she went to ask her to marry Dev. Remember, she clearly said I am not doing this only for Dev's happiness (when Sona questioned Dev your mother is doing this for your happiness and I don't exists in the equation) as you are thinking but I want you to marry because that will make me happy. so yes she did lie to get Dev's fav toy for him. She was in a hook or crook more then like always. She gets what she wants, the path to get can be ethical or unethical, she doesn't care, because she thinks herself as "GOD" and she can never be wrong.

Its but natural Sona wants to do things for her husband. She is not taking over the kitchen (more so because she does not know how to cook 😉 ), but doing small small things for your husband does make and is desired by every girl after marriage. Its not only the bedroom happiness one cares for.

Ishwari is just being stubborn. Instead of giving a little bit of space, she is fighting with Sona for Dev's attention. No she does not care for Dev or she would know Sona's presence makes Dev happy. She only does things so that Dev gives her attention. Like cooking halwa in the past, when she thought Dev might be getting away from her. And about the marriage thingy, I believe Bose family need not to have adjusted to any tradition once it was decided and agreed upon for a bengali wedding. Its the Dixit who needed to adjust. Bose family didn't ask for any compromise in Dixit's tradition at functions (though Sona disliked some) held in dixit house so why would Dixit's ask for the same.

Edited by mena_k - 8 years ago

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