Originally posted by: Samanalyse
@ARCH21 and LiveLife321: The response to your amazing "hijacking" deserved a separate post on its own. Please don't disappear!!! I absolutely loved reading through your discussion and I have to confess, based on the trajectory of the show so far, have a fairly optimistic view of how the writers are going to deal with the upcoming track.
The very fact that they have put Ishwari's insecurities and the drastic step of a suicide attempt at the front-end of the main story gives me hope. This is clearly the lowest low of the story from where the characters all have to rise and learn. The reason I feel somewhat confident about this is because Dev and Ishwari's relationship, even when it has been at its best, has faced harsh criticism from within the universe of the show, thanks to Neha's presence. When Ishwari seemed most gentle, balanced, and wise and Dev most responsible and devoted to his family, Neha was still there to call out their hypocrisy. In that sense, this show has done an excellent job of not glorifying Dev and Ishwari's relationship, and stressing that its so-called perfection is merely superficial.
Now that Sona has entered the equation, the facade they work so hard to maintain is cracking and everything they suppressed to keep it alive is slowly coming to the fore. Ishwari's sense of this change is the root of her panic, but Dev is completely oblivious to it. On the one hand she is disappointed and annoyed that Dev doesn't sense the threat to their mutually constructed "ideal relationship", on the other, she doesn't want to betray the image Dev has of her, and indeed that she has of herself, as a perfectly selfless being. So she is doing everything in her power to look good in Dev's eyes, while taking her disappointment out on an unwitting Sona who has no way of knowing how deep these issues run.
And I actually appreciate the skepticism that has arisen for the Dev-Sona pairing at this point in the story. Dev is behaving like a right arse, and not at all like the sort of man who deserves a Dr. Sonakshi Bose! It's so beyond question to him that she should bend over backwards to please his mother that he doesn't even stop to think how much he is demanding. I love the balance they are bringing between Sona's lovelorn efforts to please and her family's emotional anchoring. What Sona is going through is not uncommon when one's in love; it's easy to get so carried away in ensuring that person stays in your life, that you lose little bits of yourself, especially when that person is not making the same level of sacrifices for you. But I just adore the Bose family because they don't judge or malign her when she loses her sense of self, but are constantly reminding her of who she is, where she comes from, and how she deserves to be treated.
In the end, all three protagonists have to learn to appreciate what they have always taken for granted. Ishwari takes Dev for granted, Dev takes Sona for granted, and Sona takes her family for granted. This incident and the subsequent separation will be a huge wake up call to all of them, as to who really has their best interests at heart.
P.S. Reverse-hijacking: I just finished binging KY2 a few weeks ago! Instant fan 😃
The makers have touched a sensitive topic, triggered many responses and you have responded separately to hijackers so I am going to return in kind 😃
I have made a few posts but will try and capture the gist here...
This new Dev-Sona relationship has made imperfect cracks in Ishwari's faade. She fit herself into the image of a perfect mother - mature, selfless, who brought up her kids through hardship, hardwork & lots of love! Dev's words, actions & worship gave her the needed validation.
So she has formed an unnatural bond with Dev - he is the man of the house and she depends on him. He is at the core of her identity, her anchor, her validation after they lost everything. Neha always reminded her of things she was doing wrong, Dev always made her feel good about herself. This is not exactly a mother insecure of a new person in her Son's life - This is a woman at the brink of losing her identity!
The new relationship is bringing out the worst in her. We all have a Jekyll & Hyde within us and Ishwari is now unable to hide her Hyde!
When I saw Ishwari of the Friday episode, the thought struck me was of a tigress who bares her fangs at the smell of danger - She protects her territory, her kids, her area - Her last chat with Sona was raw.
The fact that the promo shows a guilty mother tries to convey the conflict she is going through. This woman is losing herself.
Sona - She has always dreamt of her love story. The day Dev confessed, her dream came true. Since then we have seen a Sona trying to mould herself. We all screamed how we have lost Dr. Sonakshi Bose - This woman started seeing the Dixits as her future family. She didn't tell Dev about insults that were being showered on her - keeping the man out of kitchen politics. She didn't bring her own family in conversations and her objective of pushing Dev to share about them with Ishwari was 'Maa ko bura nahi lagna chahiye'. Where was her own family in all this? She kept them after the Dixits!
If she forgets them, how will Dev remember them (something we all wanted him to do)...
Women do this all the time. We project our identities on to our partners. Someone's daughter, someone's wife, someone's mother...
Ishwari was someone's wife & became a mother when her first child was born (Dev). After losing her husband, she got validation from that child & she attached her identity to this relationship...
Sona is an independent, educated woman but she projected her identity (as a woman) on to her love. The day Asha said, 'yeh meri Shona hai'!, Sona came back to herself. She has been vocal with Dev since. She again had a chat with baba, after the Halwa drama, who told her in as many words that she is her own person and an equal. A relationship is always between 2 equals and not by the woman losing herself... (Bless him!)
She came back the next day to speak with Ishwari - She said all the right things without disrespecting or challenging.
After watching all this, what I see is this story is about identities.
Ishwari - to understand who Ishwari Dixit is beyond simply being Dev's mother.
Sona - to understand that she is her own person and she can't doubt or lose herself in love. She doesn't need Ishwari's halwa to please Dev, she has her own uniqueness,
Dev - his identity is about to be shaken. I don't think he is wrong because he has blind faith on his mother - why should he not! He genuinely believes his happiness is her happiness. Ishwari has not insulted Sona in front of him and the first time Sona shared about Ishwari's action was after the Halwa drama (she didn't share anything before and he is not a mind reader). When he sees anything, he acts - like the photo incident. His only fault is he blindly believes Ishwari is fully on his side and being in love for the first time, he is simply in a super happy bubble.
But the fact that he was a hardened person before and Sona is the first thing that he can call only his is very telling.
This story is about these 3 characters finding their own identities that will not shift with changes around. Unless the 'I' is complete, how will you say 'I love you'.
Ishwari is not evil, she is losing her identity all over again (after her husband's death) and her natural survival instinct is to fight. She needs therapy. She can't be a good mother to anyone until she knows who she is.
I want to see how Dev goes about the break-up thing after his world is shaken.
He has promised the sky to the girl & is about to snatch her piece of land - he is on very shaky ground.
PS: Ah! 3rd recommendation for KY2 😃. This is my last week of family holiday so can't binge. Need to be sensitive to family but liking what I have watched so far...
