PH one-shot - Page 2

Originally posted by: ~Rinki~

dang kimz! u did write a long one! 👏 lolz

ill reply to all the comments tomorrow! rite now its the other stories time..now that i've finished my promise to you!! ahh finally the mehndi is off! 😳 i hate sitting still for more than a hr 😆

rinkz

Originally posted by: kimmu

Yea its long. 😆 But I made it kinda prettyish, like in the center an all.. 😆😆
Thats k.. oh yea the mehndi. 🤣 I'm sure you wouldn't be able to sit still for more than 5 minutes. 😆😆

Originally posted by: kimmu

YESH FIRST! woohoo lolz

*edited* ah finally 😆 jk jk

First of all, ily for posting this! The idea you told me sounded awesome, and now that you wrote it down its even better! Every sentence was penned out beautifully... Especially the first few sentences, they really pull you in. How Heer walks into a quiet house, missing out on the kids laughter. You showed her 'worriedness' really nicely. Oh and you spelled *desperately* wrong. 🤓
aww how sweet kimz! 😳 -hugs- i did it as a present to ya...since this is prolly the first time u asked me to write a certain type of thing...so here it is 😳 ahh i had like 4 words spelled wrong...i blame err who do i blame? oooh yea lallu!! i blame him cuz i was thinkin of ways to torture him instead of focusing on the typos 😆😆
I could totally feel what Heer was feeling, her feet taking her there on her own. And then she reaces for the mala to take it off, but Lallu stops her. 😡 Oh and I love how you called him Lallu through out the whole thing and not Lalit. Seriously, he deserves NO respect at all after what he did. Heer talked back to him with fiery, woooooooooot woooooooot! Man theres something I'm dying to see. Oh and your dio's were just amazing like I already told you. I was laughing for some reason when you said he was scratching his head and LOOKING like a complete psycho. Your being nice to him rinks, he IS a complete psycho. *You spelled bald and psycho wrong.*
yea ek premi ki awaaz ayi thi i guess...i already told ya that it was gnna be lallu not lalit! dnt care how unprofessional it makes me....first he tortured poor prem and heer and then he had the damn guts to hit preet...grr that totally drew the final line, it is final, I LOATHE lallu 😡 lolz yea i would love to have seen her tlk bak to him in the show with prem by her side 😉😳 aah yesh i went bak and changed that later on, the whole phycho sentence has been modified 😆😆 sounds fancy 😆 ah yes corrected that 😃 thank-os
But I loved how Gayatri the 'lioness' spoke back to her husband. She stood up for her child, something she REALLY needs to do in the show. I think Gayatri's dio's were the best. They were coming from a true mother, and had emotion written all over them. Yeshh! Two people stood up to Lallu, this has to be the best day ever.
hehe for once i made her do something against lallu...ah a much needed dialogue and moment quite frankly 😆 ahh thanks kimz 😃
The ending of the first scene, Heer walking out with Prem's picture. I loved it! It showed that she wasn't ready to believe that Prem died...

yup heer thinking that he's dead? psshhtt like that could happen 😉😆
***

Ahh that Preet scene kills. Just imagining him sitting down there like that, and staring at Prem's picture with tears rolling down his cheek. I hated how he started to blame himself too, aah.. It really made me feel so bad for him. I could hear him hicupping while saying his dio. Ahh Rinki... I dunno how you wrote it.
trust me on this, u have no clue how i wrote it...trying to keep myself frm crying while the beating memories flashed through my mind...once again....grr i AM changing the plan for my boss and me, i think i need preet in there wit me instead of armi...i have armi wit me all the time...but rite now its preets time no? so u wanna hold kindly notice "hold" on to armi for a while...or do u want me to bring immi in as ur lover? 😉
But I loved how Ash came in to help out Preet. She knew how much Preet loved Prem, and then being blamed for his death. It must really hurt... Poor Preet was so into his guilt he never noticed Ash, even when she held his arm. Omygosh, i'm in love with that dio on Prem. It describes Prem so perfectly, and yesh, you didn't mention Lallu.
hm yea for once i used ash...i liked workin with her to be frank, she was a pretty fun and cute character to mold into the role of this shot...when u feel like something bad happened in ur family cuz of you...its pretty hard to notice the things around yourself when ur blaming urself too lolz i told ya, lallu aint coming nowhere near prem babu! 😉 ah am so happy in MINE when nxt gen. comes up, lallu will be dead 😈 muahaha 😃
Haw.... That scene of Preet-Ash was so cute. I loved how Preet gave a helpless look to Ash for her to stay, and hawwwwwwwww... Preet chance maaring? Pulled her into his lap. Then again, he needed a shoulder/curve of neck to cry on. I bet Ash was so loving being in his lap... I loved the scene. ☺️

yupz i loved writing the cute part, not the sad part 🥱 only u would think of him as chance-marying 😆 ahh bet she was 😆 lolz am glad u did 😳
***

Another killing scene. Heer walking to their meadow, while not wanting to believe that her Prem left her. That was really sad, she wanted to hang on to the hope that Prem was alive, but it was killing her inside that maybe they weren't lying. The longer she didn't see him, the longer her hope died down. I felt so bad for her. She was falling so weak without him.
ahh killing scenes everywhere eh? ahh u always understand what im trying to say through the words and actions of someone 😳...prem's the one holding heer together so she needs him more than air 😳
I loved the song you chose. Lambi Judaii... Hayee... It was seriously killing me, imagining put tears in my eyes. Her sobbing against Prem's picture... Rinkiiiii... How do you do it? You made the whole thing so symbolic.

ahh i just happened to see it in my favs, and i started listening to it while writing that prt...suited it better than any other one that came to mind soo yea 😊 aww kimzie dnt cry babez! -hugs- ahh this was prolly the hardest one-shot i have ever written, even more harder than the sad scenes i've written in all my stories so far, most likely cuz i felt more conncected with the happenings in this show at this moment, i rlly cnt think abt all this...now my mission is to make preet the happiest ever in the fics and have lallu die 😃😃 thanks kimzz
***

Ahh... My Premu injured. 😲 Something i don't ever want to see.. but aah its better than him being dead. Lallu's such an a*s. Everyone went up to the injured boy to help him walk, yet he stands there just watching everyone. Wtf is wrong with him? Then again, I'm not expecting anything good from him anymore. I was laughing at him with the constipated expression. 😆
aww i kno but better injuries than death 🥱 lolz its suits lallu 😆😆
OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG! Prem stood up to Lallu. Yesh, its like stand-up-to-Lallu day! I'm loving the whole thing.. i really really reallly love you for this shot. Haila, Preet was helping him with a dinner date? How sweeet.. And Lallu beat Preet? 😭 I really hope someone beats up Lallu. Go Prem, GO! Help your bro... Hmm.. that kinda rhymes.

lmao im glad u enjoyed this 😆 yea i thought that preet knows more of his pb than anyone else so he wouldnt make prem go out near his wedding just so he could spend time "partying" so i made it something else but course prem would kno his plan becuz he's prem 😉😆 ahh lolz keep on rhyming 😆 make ur teach proud 😉
***

This part was hilarious. Ash thought Prem was a ghost. 🤣 I loved how she was talking to her self in third person. Reminded me of your 'mood'. 😆 Omg, she started talking bad about the family/jungle. 🤣 Prem turned naughty, eh? He figured Ash thought he was a ghost and wanted to tease her... Aaaah that really cheered me up after reading all those killing scene. ASH FAINTED. 🤣🤣🤣 Why did you have to bring Kiran there? I always get confused to who it is. I mean that Kiran's a guy, and i'm a girl, and i get very very confused. But hehe... Poor Kiren, confused to see why she fainted. You spelled *unconscious* wrong.
ah yea trying to make ppl smile instead of just crying throughtout the whole shot 😆 oy!! my "mood" does not qualify in this topic...or does it? 😆😆 yupz prem raja ish naughtish 😃😃 lmao i loved writing this part 😳😃 arre i just wanted to so shush and deal with it 😆😆 ahh lolz thanks
Awww... I felt like giving Preet a hug at the image of him curled up on his bed. I loved how Prem talked to Preet in his sleep, and Preet sleepliy told his bro he loved him. It was shooo shooo sweet! I really loved it. Aww.. Heer was in the same position Preet was. Both of them curled up next too Prem's picture. He should feel so loved! Oh and btw, i loved how you said 'off to find his sweet baliye, Heer.' Made me blush for some odd reason. I think it was because of the word baliye, i'm falling in love with it. You know Usm, called me his baliye the other day... And I started getting soo red. ☺️ Maybe thats why I'm falling in love with the word... 😳😳
hehe yup this was a cute part...lolz thanks for liking it 😳😳 awwwww how cute!!! usmi is getting romantic shomantic eh? 😉😆 been learning frm armi ☺️😍 hehe how cute!! 😆
Prem-Heer's scene was shoo cute. Probably more then Preets cuz Prem picked up Heer. ☺️ And Heer gave him bashan in her sleep, but Prem just smiled at her. It was so sweet... I really wanna know how he opened the door with Heer in his arms. Was it already open, and he just pushed it farther? Wait, why am I thinking of this? I should be thinking of Prem placing Heer on her bed. ☺️ I loved that dio in italics. YESH! Lallu is gonna payyyyy... 😈
aww thanks! hehe yupz bhashan time 😆 lolz this is prem, he can do anything simply...idk how he got the door to open but he managed to 😆😆 lmao yea think of prem and heer 😆 hehe yupz time to payy 😆
Aww... He held her hand while she was sleeping. It kind of reminded me of that scene where Heer was sleeping and Prem sat next to her on the floor and fell asleep next to her hands... But it was kinda different cuz in my imagination it was all dark and Heer had better clothes, and Prem was in a suit for some reason. But it looked so smexy. ☺️

whoohoo lolz yea aii haii kya baat hai?? howw cuteeee!!!!! ahh im already dreaming that up 😳😳😳 i bet it looked SMEXY since this is prem we tlkin abt 😉😃
***
A forward through all the days, eh? Yay, Preets feeling better. I hope he gets back to his naughty personality. Ash is there for that now, isn't she? Omg, Lallu has such a weird way of apologizing. Ahh, I'm so glad no one forgived him. I'm proud of them. I was hoping Veera would leave with Lallu, but oh well. We still have time to kick her out too. 😈
ah yea just forward it all 😆 yup better with ashy's help 😆 lmao this is lallu na 😆 arre ab tum veera ke peeche bi lag gayi in this shot??
I'm so glad Lally realized himself no one wanted him in the house and decided to get out himself. Yeshh.. I don't feel bad for him at all. 😃 He's always been a selfish jerk, now he can live with himself for the rest of his life.
ah yea i wanted prem to drag him out but...mehndi 😆😆
***
Finally, the scene I was waiting for. Prem and Heer, together... alone. ☺️ Just as Lallu left Heer got good clothes... wooohoooo!... And they were matching, even better... I loved how you wrote everything down, all the words were just made the scene even more mystical. Hats off! 👏
ahh yeshh their scene 😆 ahh im not ekta, better clothes for my actors 😉😆 aww how sweet!! thanks kimzz 😳😳🤗
Preeet! Left a wink to Prem, how naughty... Prem would've so blushed at that, or smiled... Since he's been getting into his naughty moods too. Ahh I loved everything about it Rinks.. Seriously awesome job. The song is so awesome... no Haal-e-Dil? 😊 No i'm just kidding, i just want to annoy you by keep on mentioning it, but you like it too.. so *sigh*
lmao yupp, hehe nah no haal-e-dil today...next time kay?
Yay! I made you write it, finally you listen to me. 🥳 Oyee.. shush up, it was awesome! Don't you dare try to put yourself down. Aw.. thats k, i kno i know.. Your getting married... (To armi) Your just trying to hide it from me. *hmph*
oyy i listen to you...sometimes 😆😆 aww thanks kimz 😳😳 am glad u enjoyed!! 😳😃 err is it armi or mikey? now who the heck am i married/or getting married to? 😆😆😆
I don't have more words to describe to tell you how much I loved it. It was amazing. 👏
thank you!!! ☺️🤗
MY COMMENT IS OFFICIALLY DONE!
yay!!! 😆

kimz
rinkz