Discussion: What If????????? - Page 3

Originally posted by: nyzbabigyal

well srk and rani - they had a lot in common.. their personalities and blah blah - they were similar.. they could talk to each other openly and understand and each other.. and yep they did take that step further and "did it"

no i don't believe ur soul mate is someone ur romantically involved wit... cuz even though srk and rani did take it that far.. but they did show.. how much quality time they spent wit one another and understood one another.. that's y it reminded me of KANK

😆 Try to separate KANK and let's tie this into J&B and in general. This is just my personal opinion, but I genuinely believe that emotional "infidelity" is much more dangerous and complicated than physical infidelity.

Originally posted by: kajolfan

How many different definitions are there of "soulmate?" Unfortunately, many a times one's "life partner" isn't always their soulmate (rightly or wrongly).

Originally posted by: kajolfan

How many different definitions are there of "soulmate?" Unfortunately, many a times one's "life partner" isn't always their soulmate (rightly or wrongly).

Rani...

Unfortunately soulmate like love cannot and is not defined exactly the same way by everyone and hence I ventured to ask what your opinion is...

Personally, for me a soulmate is a person, who I would never have to change for or explain my actions to. That person would know and understand me for who I am an individual and as a person. I would also reciprocate that exact same feelings...this is irrespective of age, sex, caste, creed, anything else...

Rivs

Originally posted by: nyzbabigyal

true but who actually has that kind of time on their hands.. to go search for their soul mate in another person apart from their spouse..

i mean if ur spouse keeps u happy.. would u develop those kinda feelings fo someone else??? would u look at someone who u share a lot in common wit and be like "hmm we're soulmates".. .. i mean it could happen.. but if that happens.. would u betray ur spouse - d one who's always there fo u.. and so on... its just bac to being complicating.. there's a lot u have to look at.. there is no perfect answer😕

Navs...the question of betrayal comes when u are romantically involved with your soulmate...whether it is emotionally or physically.

Originally posted by: kajolfan

😆 Try to separate KANK and let's tie this into J&B and in general. This is just my personal opinion, but I genuinely believe that emotional "infidelity" is much more dangerous and complicated than physical infidelity.

So you equate relationship with a soulmate to emotional infidelity? But fidelity itself is one word with such a range of meanings...loyalty, conjugal fiathfulness, stricture, adherence to something...

Rivs

Originally posted by: fsam

Rivya your soulmate is one who is ideally suited for you as a mate. One who understands you probably better than you understand yourself. People don't always go looking for their soulmate.

Thanks farah...i like your definition...

one reason I first asked the question was because I did not want to jump into a conversation and then offend folks with my ideas...

Rivs

Originally posted by: nyzbabigyal

true but who actually has that kind of time on their hands.. to go search for their soul mate in another person apart from their spouse.. This is one of the glitches of "finding your soulmate"....I doubt everyone goes around searching, and hitting on every Tom, Dick and Harry and says, "Hi, I'm such and such, are you my soulmate?" "Hmmm, I'm feeling lucky....I think you are!" It simply doesn't work that way. I'm certainly no expert on this but I think soulmate connotates a spiritual connection where only the two parties involved can understand.

i mean if ur spouse keeps u happy.. would u develop those kinda feelings fo someone else??? This would depend on one's definition of "happy" and again, if one finds their soulmate in their spouse then obviously there wouldn't be that "pull" towards anyone else. would u look at someone who u share a lot in common wit and be like "hmm we're soulmates".. .. i mean it could happen.. but if that happens.. would u betray ur spouse - d one who's always there fo u.. and so on... its just bac to being complicating.. there's a lot u have to look at.. there is no perfect answer😕 No perfect answer indeed!

Originally posted by: fsam

Harveen let me play devils advocate and ask you this, would you be committed to your husband or would you feel you are cheating on him if you long to belong to someone else, wake up in his arms? There is no doubt in my mind that I would feel like I am cheating on him. To be emotionally detached to your husband is probably one of the worse things! I think Rani said (somewhere before this) that an emotional relatiohship is much more dangerous than a physical one- in terms of infidelity. I would definitely feel like I am cheating. Its like a feeling of distancing yourself.

Second devils advocate question, eventually would you resent your husband or blame him for keeping you away from your soulmate? What happens to the marriage then? If I am the one who feels I have a soulmate other than my own husband, then who is at fault here? Its not my husband but it is me. The husband is just the innocent bystandard who gets emotionally butchered through this whole situation. The problem the husband would probably catch wind of this distance and emotional detachment himself- somehow or the other. The marriage probably wouldnt survive.. Its not right, but its not wrong either. How can you give yourself body and soul to someone you dont believe is the one you are connected with at every level? Then again, if you do give yourself, and put in all your effort and it just doesnt work.. arent you being just unfair to everyone?

Originally posted by: rivya

So you equate relationship with a soulmate to emotional infidelity? But fidelity itself is one word with such a range of meanings...loyalty, conjugal fiathfulness, stricture, adherence to something...

Rivs

I equate "infidelity" with "dishonor." As Farah puts it, "would it be considered cheating if you long for another person, want to wake up in some one else arms, think about someone else while intimate with your spouse?" Based on this, then yes, if someone is married and sees their soulmate in someone apart from their spouse, I do wholeheartedly consider it emotional infidelity.

Originally posted by: fsam

Rani I agree with you about it being subjective and depend on right and wrong. However, my opinion is that most people choose to honor their committment than follow love and end up loosing both.

If you stay committed it is very hard for you to be emotionally satisfied, this will deffo not be your spouses fault. But you will long to belong to someone else, long to be with your soulmate. Evetually, probably coming to resent your spouse for no fault of his. Will this be fair to your spouse, who is left with a mate who is emotionally infidel to him?