Hey guys…
Seems like it is only during my exams that I get ideas…Ha!!! Maybe because my brain is working overtime…Here is another one… … Savirahe is a word used in the famous Ashtapadi by Jayadeva!!! Here "sa" means she and "virahe" refers to the waiting that is Radha waiting for Krishna…
ENJOY!!!!
******
:: Savirahe ::
"More strange than true: I never may believe
these antic fables, nor these fairy toys.
Lovers and madmen have such seething brains,
such shaping fantasies, that apprehend
more than cool reason ever comprehends.
The lunatic, the lover and the poet
are of imagination all compact… …"
{William Shakespeare, A Midsummer night's dream, Act 5, Scene 1}
Jai Walia leaned back…the faint light of the ongoing PowerPoint presentation playing hide and seek on his preoccupied face… not even a single word managed to reach his ears… his ears were still ringing with her soft sighs, swishing purrs… his mind still clogged with her breath-taking images…her boat-shaped lips, moist and full, parting and un-parting…her eyes, the beautiful lotus-leafed eyes…sparkling with a film of tears… those small hands which touched him with a shyness of their own… the slim neck inviting him…the stooped shoulders further arching in delight… the heaving bosom…expansive navel…lithe legs…curved feet… he couldn't shake off that picture of perfect beauty from his mind ever since last night… the darkest night filled his life with the brightest memory… he was desperate to show his once unwanted wife that he wanted her, prove that he wasn't with some other woman… he was only hers… …in that desperation and mind-numbing despair he made love to her in the most intimate and intense manner… He had had affairs with numerous good-looking females in his past but no one could touch him the way his wife did… she touched his heart, his soul, she touched the inner most core of his being…
He sat mesmerized…feeling a lump in his throat… sitting as if he didn't belong here… like he had drank a potion… a drug which was showing its effect…
"Jaii…" it was aditya's constant nudging that broke the spell…
"What is it???" he said with an irritated toss of his head… he didn't want to come out… out of that trace…out of that enchantment… he wanted to stay there… forever…
"What do you think about the presentation…???" aditya asked, surprised to note how uninformed he looked… …
"I…I remember something…can we do this later…" he said in his usual smooth way with a hint of authority…
"But…"
"See you later…" he was already up and was moving out before anybody could judge anything… …
He felt like a teenage boy as he held the bunch of deep red roses behind his back, trying to escape the prying eyes of his family members… stealthily climbing the stairs which lead to his room… …all he wanted to do was hold her in arms and kiss her like there was no tomorrow… …he grinned foolishly thinking of how he would say it to her, imaging the scene and thinking of how she would react…
"Where is bani madam Tony???" he asked trying to sound as normal as possible… but failing miserably at not being able to stop that bubbling enthusiasm in his voice…
"Pia madam has come…she is with her…in rano madam's room…" Tony informed dutifully, giving his master a funny look seeing him so love struck…even a blind man would be able to say that he was hopelessly in love… he left silently…Jai frowned a bit, bringing he bunch of flowers to his front…he caressed their petals… just when he was about to pass towards his room, he heard a wailing shout…
"Di…it's all my mistake…I should not have done this…it's all my mistake di…" it was pia's voice…
"No pia…aisa nahin hain…" bani was trying to pacify her…
"I have destroyed your life di…Mr. Walia and you are married…and I know this is a show off… you don't love each other…Oh!!!! I have done such a blunder… diii…"
Jai's grip around the rose stems tightened…
"Pia…aisa…"
"Nahin di…bas…you leave Mr. Walia…I will talk to him…he will understand…"
He didn't wait to hear more…he threw the roses in the dustbin as he entered his study, locking it… pacing towards the window he looked out… the sky was dark… grey clouds gathering,…he scorned at the parallelism… his life was nothing less than that… a crowd of grey clouds, masking every possible happiness he ever experienced… Why was it that whenever he found happiness, it was snatched away from him cruelly… he wasn't destined to be loved…
Yes, he wanted to say so many things to her… he wanted to apologize to her for his uncalled behavior, he wanted to say how she unlocked the closed doors of his heart… how she filled his barren life with love and care… he wanted to say that he had fallen in love with her unknowingly… and had wanted to hear her reply him shyly how she too felt the same for him… … But… like a dream which ended when the morning sun came…his hope also died out in a split-second… when he woke up she was not there… maybe it was a moment's weakness… and moreover she was drugged… she wasn't feeling well…maybe she didn't want this… maybe she didn't love him… …Was all this just a figment of his imagination????? But her shy glances towards him, her sweet blushing, her excessive concern for him… Was all that just pretence??? Or plain niceness on her part…????
There was brief knock on the door… with much reluctance he opened it to find his wife standing holing a coffee mug, looking ethereal…her cheeks turning a brilliant shade of crimson under his unmoving gaze…
"Tony ne bataya ki aap aagaye…aap itni jaldi aagaye…" bani said handing him the coffee mug feeling jittery…after last night they didn't have time to talk to each other… she wetted her lips… not knowing what to say or do…??? She was yearning to hear him speak… anticipating to listen when he told her that he loved her… just like she did… …
"I need to go to Pune urgently…" he informed her flatly…
"Abhi…I mean…shaadi ka ghar hain…aur aap…"
"It's urgent…" he said not looking at her…
"And maasi is leaving tomorrow…karuna didi ke pass jaa rahin hain US…"
Bani's face suddenly turned gloomy…yes, maasi had informed her but…she wondered what her fate would be once she leaves…Will he accept her as his wife in the truest sense????
"Bataya maasi ne…"
"I will drop her to the airport and leave from there…"
"Kab lautenge…"
"Do din…"
"I will do your packing…"
He kept watching mutely as she turned around and left… …
******
"What happened??? Why is everybody staring at me like that…???" jai said entering the house, looking surprised at how every family member was looking at him sympathetically… …
"Will anybody tell me…???" he asked restlessly… …
"Beta woh…" daadi spoke up…but was quickly intervened by an over-excited jigyasa…
"These small-town girls bhiayaa I tell you…bani chali gayi… aapka khayal bhi nahin kiya… at least she should have had the courtesy to tell you, inform you about her decision…nahin maharani bag uthai aur chali gayi…" jigyasa said… jai stood stunned… so his assumption was right…
"Ek din toh jaana tha na… big deal…" he said in an automated way…leaving… not wanting to see a dejected aditya and a crying daadi… …
Its wasn't the same after that… …the house was biting him… his room which still held her living presence tormented him… the roses he brought were still in the dustbin, wilted, their faded scent wafting away…it would take a lifetime for him to forget her… he recollected aditya's words...
"I don't know jai…she was so happy…till yesterday…making all your favorite dishes since you were about to come…"
"Achanak pata nahin…we were all busy with the preparations…we couldn't find bani and rano…kuch toh hua hain…they had left…"
"Tum yahaan kya kar rahin ho…" he heard a shout…the door of the study being pushed opened…
"What the hell!!!!" he shouted at being disturbed…
"See jai bhaiyya…this disgusting girl…barged inside our house…" jigyasa said fuming with anger…
"Mr. Walia…please listen to me…its important…" pia pleaded…
"You are going or not pia…" jigyasa held her arm…
"Jigyasa…leave her…"
"What is it pia… make it fast…"
"It's about di… she didn't leave on her will…jigyasa aunty forced her to…"
"She is lying jai bhaiyya…this bi**h…"
"Hold your tongue jigyasa…leave…just leave now…" jai said acidly…
"How do you know…???"
"Pushkar was coming to take me back… I was about to leave when I heard jigyasa aunty telling di that now since maasi had gone, she should leave at the earliest… …"
"Di had no option…you were not there…and then…jigyasa aunty told that you were…"
"I was what!!!"
"That you were going to marry Roshni soon…"
Jai stood baffled…
"I…" no words came out of his mouth…
"Di loves you…Mr. Walia…she loves you a lot…"
"But that day you were only telling her to divorce me…"
"I was sicne I though you both didn't want this marriage…but after that di told me that she had accepted this marriage whole-heartedly and maybe you too…"
"Ohhhh!!! SHIT!!!!!"
"I…I should have told her…I need to find her…now…"
"Please bring her back soon…" pia said
"Thanks…thanks for everything…" jai said genuinely, forgetting all the hatred he had for her… …
******
Bani watered the plants…her heart sank thinking about jai and roshni together… she blinked away a teardrop…maybe she wouldn't have believed jigyasa aunty if only he had said anything to her… was that night only a mere flash of vulnerability…was it just a moment's indulgence for him…she was extremely jealous of Roshni after watching them dancing away to glory on anu's engagement party…she just couldn't take it…and had rushed back home…he had come looking for her… concerned… demanding to know what was wrong… she thought he understood her pain, her envy, her growing possessiveness for him… maybe that propelled him to culminate their marriage… but her dreams shattered as soon as they were formed… …
She knew everything was over…they practicality of her mind told her that it was finished…but her stupid heart couldn't accept it… …maybe one day he would come…come to her… …those eyes…those warm eyes…the way he gazed at her under the moonlight…promising her a new world... just maybe he would return to her… but… she assuaged her heart… until he came… she would wait…wait till eternity… like Radha waited for her Krishna to arrive… …
Aaoge Jab Tum O Saajana
Angana Phool Khilenge
Barsega Saawan, Barsega Saawan Jhoom Jhoomke
Do Dil Aise Milenge
Aaoge Jab Tum O Saajana, Angana Phool Khilenge
Naina Tere Kajraare Hai, Naino Pe Hum Dil Haare Hai
Anjaane Hi Tere Naino Ne Waade Kiye Kayi Saare Hai
Saanson Ki Lay Madham Chalein, Tose Gaye
(Barasega Saawan) Jhoom Jhoomke, Do Dil Aise Milenge
Aaoge Jab Tum Ho Saajana, Angana Phool Khilenge
Chanda Ko Taaku Raaton Mein, Hai Zindagi Tere Haanthon Mein
Palkon Pe Jhilmil Taarein Hain, Aana Bhari Barsaaton Mein
Sapnon Ka Jahaan, Hoga Kela Kela
(Barasega Saawan ) Jhoom Jhoomke, Do Dil Aise Milenge
Angana Phool Khilenge
{Movie: Jab We Met}
A tuft of entangled emotions surged inside him as his eyes fell on her lost face… he had flown to Mt. Abu in a jiffy…not wanting to waste even a single second which would keep him apart from her… …
"I hope I am not late…" he said pushing the wooden door ajar… her disoriented eyes shot up… a fountain of tears automatically sprung in those eyes… …
"Why did you leave…???" he asked as he reached her… …
"Because you didn't ask me to stay… and I thought… …" she broke down crying… he gently took her in his arms…stroking her…
"Never ever leave me again…" he hugged her tightly… …finally their wait was over… …
******
The End…
God bless
dhani
Bade Achhe Lagte Hain
Anupamaa
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