SS: ~Ehsaas~updatd chptr 14 on page 81 - Page 23

(It was almost evening and everyone in the palace was waiting for hakim sahib's arrival...the atmosphere had suddenly turned really cold and chilly...the birds were returning to their nest and environment was so calm...but there was a place that was running out of piece completely that was jalal's heart...jalal walked down in the garden...all lost in thoughts...he looked up at the sky...and was wondering that what a drastic turn his life had taken in those few hours b/w the first and last ray of the sun...the mood of the nature was not very much different from his heart and mind's condition...it was getting cloudy and faint...just like the silence before any storm...and jalal could easily sense that...he walked up to the sitting area located in the middle of the garden and settle down there with a storm of thoughts in his mind...."How unfortunate I am?? When jodha begum wanted to explain...wanted to justify her act...I dint allow her to do so...when the letter was there in my hands...instead of checking it out...I tore it into pieces and now when I want to know the reality...to read that letter again...I am not able to find it...now when I am ready to listen her explanation...she is not with me...I MISS YOU JODHA BEGUM...I REALLY MISS YOU..."😭...a lone tear rolled down his cheek...at the same time...he felt a soft hand on his shoulder...he looked up at the person...it was none other than salima...who was observing jalal from a while...but jalal was so much preoccupied with his dilemma that he failed to notice her presence...seeing salima staring at him, he quickly wiped off his tear and faced away...salima sat down beside him with her hand still on his shoulder... )

Salima: - (in a soft voice) mat chipayiye is aansuo ko shenshah...beh jane dijiye inhe...aapka man halka ho jayega...

Jalal: - chipa nahi rahe salima begum...bus khud ko samhalne ki koshish kar rahe the... (Now he looked at her) aap yaha??

Salima:- kuch nahi...bus aapko yaha tanha dekha to chale aaye...shenshah... ...hum jante hai ke aap jodha begum ki halat ko lekar pareshan hai...hairani to hume bhi bahut hui thi hakima sahiba ki baat sunker...magar unhone jo kaha usne anayas hi hum ek wakye(incident) ki yaad dila di...

Jalal: -(with surprise) kaisa wakeya salima begum??

Salima:- jaisa ke aap jante hai shenshah ke aapke khan baba merhum bairam khan sahib aksar riyasati dauro per raha karte the...unhi dino ki baat hai...ek baar unke kaafile me bhi ek sainik per isi tarah ka humla hua tha...us waqt jis hakim ne us sipaahi ka ilaj kiya tha...unka kehna tha ke ye humla kisi insaan ke zriye karawaya gaya hai...ek esa insaan jise khaas taur per logo ko zeher dene ke liye hi taiyaar kiya jata hai...aur jyadatar is tarah ke kaamo ke liye aurato ko hi chuna jata hai...

Jalal: - kahin aapka matlab zeherdoshiyo (vishkanya) se to nahi...

Salima: - ji shenshah...bilkul sahi farmaya aapne...hum unhi ke bare me baat kar rahe the...

(they were so much busy in discussing the issue that they dint notice when Rahim came up through the stairs present at the other side and sat behind them on the couch...he was carrying a letter in his hand that was torn into four pieces...salima was describing each and everything about that incident and jalal was listening very carefully to her as he thought that it might help in finding out the reason behind jodha's state...on the other hand...Rahim...still unaware of what all had happened to his "choti ammi jaan" began to rejoin the parts of letter ...jalal was not knowing but the truth was just a step away from him...Rahim tried to read the letter at first but failed to read it properly as it was written in pure devnagri...a language that he was not familiar with ..that much...he made a sad face...not getting able to read it then suddenly he looked at his mother and an idea came into his mind...he pulled salima's pallu from behind but she dint noticed as she was busy talking with jalal...he again tried but this time with a request...)

Rahim: - ammi jaan...ammi jaan... (salima looked at him...)

Salima: - kya hai rahim...aap do pal theher nahi sakte kya...hum shenshah se baat kar rahe hai na...

Rahim: - ammi jaan...hum to bus itna janna chahte the...kya aapko hindi padhni aati hai...hume ye padhker suna dijiye na.... (He signaled towards the letter with his eyes...)

Salima: - Rahim...beta...abhi hum shenshah se kuch zaroori baat kar rahe hai...aap apne hojre me chaliye...hum kuch der baad suna dege aapko...

(And she again shifted her attention towards jalal and they continued their discussion...but Rahim was adamant on reading it right now...as u know how stubborn kids are... he started to argue with salima...)

Rahim: - nahi ammi jaan...hume abhi sunna hai...aap abhi padhker sunayiye hume...suna dijiye na... (And he started doing all the tactics to make salima read the letter...being way too stubborn)

(it was getting on jalal's nerves...he was already way too frustrated and upset with the accident happened with jodha...this discussion was indeed really very important for him...and Rahim worked as an obstacle in that...he bust out loud on rahim...full on in rage...)

Jalal: - (more loudly than ever) kya baat hai rahim?? Aapko samajh me nahi aata aapki ammi jaan kya keh rahi hai aapse...ab isse pehle ke hum apna aapa kho de...jayiye yaha se...fauran...

(poor little boy got really scared at his reaction...he picked up the pieces in his hands and started moving away silently with a sad face...jalal looked back to confirm whether his order was accepted or not...when he noticed the piece of papers in his hand...it had the same orange background...the similar one that he was looking for...he recognized it to be jodha's letter...he immediately stopped Rahim...)

Jalal: - Rahim...zara thehriye... (rahim stopped) ...ye...ye aapke haath me kya hai...

(Rahim dint answered as he was angry with jalal for shouting on him...he bowed his head down...jalal realized his mistake that he shouldn't have talked with Rahim in such a high tone...he came and sat down in front of him on his knees...)

Jalal: - Rahim...hum jante hai ke aap humse khafa hai...hume aap per is tarah chikhna nahi chahiye tha...hume muaff kar dijiye... (He held his ears with both of his hands)...hum kya karte rahim...aapki choti ammi jaan ki tabiyat thik nahi hai Na...to hum unhe lekar thode se pareshan the... (His throat chocked a bit while saying this) ...isliye aap per chikhne ki gustaakhi ker baithe...

Rahim: -(with a smile...) koi baat nahi shenshah...hum naraz nahi hai...lekin choti ammi jaan ko kya hua hai??

(His innocent question caused jalal's eyes to get filled with tears but he controlled himself anyhow...)

Jalal: - kuch nahi rahim...bus thodi si kamzori hai... (His voice became really heavy)...jaldi hi thik ho jayegi...aapne bataya nahi...ye aapke haath me kya hai...

Rahim: - ye...ye to hume baagiche me pada mila...to humne utha liya...magar ye hindi me likha hai...isiliye ammi jaan se keh rahe the padhne ke liye...

(jalal quickly took the letter from rahim's hand...his words of letter being in hindi almost confirmed his doubt...he immediately handed the letter to salima)

Jalal: - ye...ye khat hume padhker sunayegi aap salima begum??...lijiye...dekhiye kya likha hai isme...

(salima was surprised at this sudden change in jalal's behavior...he was looking way too restless...and impatient...)

Salima: - kya baat hai shenshah?? Aap pehchante hai kya is khat ko...itne bechain kyu hai aap??

Jalal: - baato ka waqt nahi hai salima begum...khuda ke liye...jaldi se is khat ko padhker sunaiye hume...

(Seeing jalal's impatience...salima quickly started to rejoin the letter and started reading it...)

Salima: -(reading the letter) "shenshah ko Rani jodha ka pranaam" (she looked at jalal...and understood why he was getting so restless to read the letter...jalal's heart was racing like an engine...finally the letter was there in salima's hands in front of him and truth will be revealed soon ...he was really afraid and anxious at the same time ...salima continued)

"bahut dino se aapse ek baat kehna chah rahe the kintu samajh me nahi aa raha tha ke kaise kahe...aapne tasnim ke vishya me jis prakar humara saath diya...hume samman diya usse hum atydhik prasann hai...aapke nirnay ke liye hum aapki prashnsha karna chahte the parantu kehne ka saahas nahi juta paaye...hume garv hai aapki nyay vyavastha aur niti kushalata per..."

"aapki raani jodha..."

(And with it she finished the letter...jalal was still in a trance...he dint realized that the letter has finished...)

Jalal: - ruk kyu gayi salima begum?? Padhiye na...

Salima: - padh diya humne shenshah...bus itna hi likha hai is khat me...

(jalal was shocked...had no idea what is happening...still he was not able to believe at her words...)

Jalal: - nahi salima begum...zaroor aapse padhne me koi galti hui hai...aap ek baar phir dekhiye na...shayad aapne pura khat nahi padha...phir se padhker sunayiye hume...

(salima was helpless...she had to follow his order...she read the letter again...it was again the same... neither much nor less...she again finished the letter with the same sentence...."aapki rani jodha...")

Salima: - bus itna hi hai is khat me shenshah...aur kuch bhi nahi hai... (She put her hand on his shoulder...) kya baat hai shenshah??...

(she was about to ask further when a baandhi came with hamida's message...that she had called her immediately...Rahim too started insisting on meeting his choti ammi jaan...)

Salima: - muaff kijiye magar hume jana hoga shenshah...humara mashwara hai ke aap bhi yaha jyada der na ruke...hawa tez ho gayi hai...shayad bearish hone wali hai...aap...

Jalal:-(interrupting her in b/w) aap rahim ko lekar jayiye salima begum...hum kuch der akele rehna chahte hai....(salima could sense the pain in his voice...she left taking Rahim with her...now jalal was all alone there...)

BG STARTS: - "BAARISH" from the movie "YAARIYAAN (2013)"

Yaariyan ve... Yaariyan
Yaariyan ve... yaariyan ve..
Yaariyaan... yaa...

(The wind had suddenly turned really cold and freezing...it started blowing really hard...jalal's hairs started flying with its rhythm too...the cold breeze touched his face gently...his eyes had become red filled with tears by now...he was shocked...hurt and shattered beyond words at the same time...his racing heartbeats seemed to be slow down at once...almost nil...he was feeling his body too heavy to carry for that moment...he lifted up the letter in his hands...as soon as he picked it up...his eyes started visualizing every moment of hatred, revenge and insult in those torn pieces of papers...and started walking down the stairs all devastated... )

Dil mera hai nasamajh kitna
Besabar ye bewkoof bada
Chahta hai kitna tujhe
Khud magar nahi jaan sakaa

("shenshah humari baat to suniye"...."hume aapki koi baat nahi sunni...aapne suna nahi humne kya kha ...jayiye yaha se..."...in the function how he first looked at jodha and when she walked up to the thrown..."hum chahege ke aaj humara khaas taufa humare saath aaker baithe"...then how Benazir surpassed her and sat beside him smirking...how he made Benazir wear the "kada" he gifted her...in front of jodha..."lekin haath se jyada ye kahin aura acha lagega..."...how he humiliated her in front of all royal and the public as well in meena bazaar..."humare paas benchne ke liye to kuch nahi hai kintu hum aapke liye ek bhent laaye hai..."..."ye meena bazaar hai...hum yaha kharidne aaye hai...taufe lene nahi..."...and he moved further without looking back at her...how he accused her for the precious gift containing her blessings..."aapne hume wo tamacha mara jo sidha jaker humari rooh per laga...aapki himmat kaise hui humari mardangi per sawal uthane ki..." ..."kintu shenshah"..."Bus (pointing his finger)...jayiye yaha se")

Is dard-e-dil ki sifarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhigaa de poori tarah

(He walked down to some distance but feeling his legs too heavy to lift further...he tumbled and fell down on his knees...as his body had stopped supporting him and became almost numb for that moment...his flooded eyes began to flow down his cheeks...as he fell down suddenly there was thunder and lightning...and it started raining really heavily...it seemed like the nature too had started crying in his pain...jalal looked at the letter in his hands and caressed it with his fingers imagining jodha's face in it...his tears got merged with the rain drops but they dint stopped coming out even for a sec ...)

Is dard-e-dil ki sifarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhigaa de poori tarah

(...Each and every word of her started echoing in his ears ..."Hum jante hai ke aapki koi galti nahi hai...aap apni jagah bilkul sahi hai...kintu hume bhay hai ke kahin aapko sach ka pata lagte itni der na ho jaaye ke humare bich sahi karne ko kuch bhi shesh na bache..."...the memory of her painful flooded eyes started haunting him...the moment when she touched her and she fell down lifelessly...how she clutched his kurta tight...even after striving hard for her life...she never stop saying until she was completely unconscious..."humara vishwaas...vishwaas kijiye...humne kuch nahi kiya..."... ...)

Kya huaa asar tere saath reh kar naa jaane
Ki hosh mujhe naa raha
Lafz mere thhe zubaan pe aake ruke
Par ho na sake woh bayaan

(.the horrifying memories pierced his heart into pieces...his throat had become too glitch and heavy to speak anything...his breathes had become irregular because of the silent sobs coming in b/w...he clutched the letter tight in his hand and moved it close to his heart... and finally the sight when she sprang down in his arms came in front of his eyes...he just shut his eyes tightly and started screaming out loud in agony unable to speak anything...looking at the sky...)

Dhadkan tera hi naam jo le
Aankhein bhi paighaam ye de
Teri nazar ka hi ye asar hai
Mujh pe jo huaa

Jalal: - arhhh... (Crying bitterly...completely shattered)

Is dard-e-dil ki sifaarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhiga de poori tarah

(his sobs were getting more and more loud and painful...he had broken down completely...it felt like he had no strength left in his body...he was cursing himself for not trusting her... ...for hurting such a pure soul... for confiding in a person that was not even a bit worthy of it...he was ashamed of himself and his so called manly ego in which he stooped so low to take his revenge without knowing the truth...he was feeling backstabbed...and the person that did this was none other than his "BADI AMMI"...the women whom he worshipped like his allah...for the first time in life...he was feeling helpless...ashamed on being an illiterate...he almost squeezed his cheeks with his nails...it was getting really hard for him to bear this feeling of repentance and not having the one around...when he needed her the most...he almost covered his face with his hands and started weeping bitterly with uncontrollable sobs...)

Is dard-e-dil ki sifaarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhiga de poori tarah

Yaariyan ve... Yaariyan...

(He was lamenting poorly in his grief covering his face with his hands...with his head bowed down...all lost in his emotional trauma...when he felt a soft touch on his head...he looked up at the person...it was none other than jodha...dressed in a white angelic outfit with his hair left open...just the way jalal liked them to be...looking innocently at him with a faint smile with tears in her eyes...she was indeed looking like an absolute fragile and divine princess with incredible glow on her face...jalal couldn't take his eyes off her...she caressed his head with her soft hands and wiped his tears off by running her fingers on his wet face...moved her head sideways in a "no" signaling "plz don't cry..."...smiled at him)

Tu jo mila
Toh zindagi hai badli
Main poora naya ho gaya
Hai be-asar duniya ki baatein badi
Ab teri sunu main sadaa

(...jalal couldn't hold himself any more...he took both of her hands in his...kissed them softly and bowed down his head on her hands...started crying profusely with irresistible sobs and hiccups...his tears started flowing involuntarily...he never did that before...never been so week before but this moment was just out of control...he locked her hands in his completely and keep on sobbing like a child...asking for forgiveness silently unable to utter anything)

Milne ko tujhse, bahaane karun
Tu muskuraaye, wajah main banun
Roz bitaana saath mein tere, saara din mera

(he forgot where he was ...who he was...if someone was looking at him or not...because at this time he was just a deeply hurt and shattered man who was madly in love with a girl that was striving for her life...he dint noticed for how long he was like that...finally he lifted up his face to see those two beautiful doe like eyes again that had drove him insane once...but to add in his sorrow...no one was there...he was alone...the place was completely secluded...only the sound of thunderstorm and sight of rain drops were there...this made him restless...to go out of his senses...only he could understand the regret and pain...he was going through...his eyes started searching for her in every direction impatiently...but she was not there...actually she was never there...he was just hallucinating her presence...the thought caused a sharp pang in the middle of his chest and he started screaming out her name loud in agony...his voice having such immense pain that never been heard by the nature itself... )

Is dard-e-dil ki sifaarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhiga de poori tarah (x4)

Jalal: -(in extreme anguish) Jodhaaa... (And a long waiting scream came out and pierced the sky to reach the divinity)

Precap:- maham- jalal confrontation😳

thanku friends...😃

plz dun forget to like and comment..😉