OSR SS- She hates me, she hates me not! Final pt6-Pg1 updated 21st Sep - Page 9

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ashpat thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#81
first of all thank you so much for giving such a gr8 chapter. I loved it when they wanted to win over each other. The bolded parts are my fav and few comments in red.

Please don't end this ss and if u do then plzzz start a new one soon. You are an amazing and fantastic writer.👏👏👏

Originally posted by: lashy

PART 5 - Unfamiliar emotions

Jodha's tent


'I was unable to come pay you a visit this morning due to some other issues...' he addressed her through her reflection in the mirror 'However, I am glad to see you are better now'

She responded with a faint smirk 'Thank you Shehenshah...anyway, I heard you'd paid me quite a few visits in the past few days' The remark was blunt, but the rebel in her wanted to gauge his reactions.

The spirited Emperor grew intrigued as he tried to understand what she was hinting at. He played along - retaliating with a mischievously haughty frown 'Well...I had no other go...I needed to see how you were doing...my return to Agra was unexpectedly delayed by your condition, you see...' he paused 'Why, did I do anything wrong?'

She was right. He was as egoistic as ever - and to think that a short while ago she'd nearly wondered if he'd changed 'Oh! Nothing' she replied- the sarcasm in her tone obvious 'Only that your manner of expressing gratitude is quite different to any I've witnessed Shehenshah...'

Surveying her expressions in the mirror, he questioned with mock innocence 'Why, have I not done something I should be doing Begum Jodha?' He knew precisely what she was expecting.

'Shehenshah...if you do not have any appreciation for my actions, the least you could do is NOT taunt me for them...' she mumbled in annoyance 'Anyway, I was wrong to expect ANY gratefulness from you...'

'Appreciation? Gratefulness?' he shrugged lightly 'For what?'

'For having saved your life, of course!' she'd nearly yelled there

He hadn't realized how far he'd missed having glimpses of her flaming temperament the past few days. There was no question he was enjoying this. Folding his hands, Jalal gazed at her with an air of authority 'From what I remember, I'd specifically asked you NOT to go out on your own...you disobeyed me...so, you want me to appreciate that?' he broke out into a subtle smile 'Besides, 'I' was the one who'd saved YOUR life...and I don't recollect YOU thanking ME for it either...'

There was a long pause in the room - very long! The frustrated queen looked away from his wry stares. Whichever way she debated it, he still had a point!

'Fine...' she eventually ceased the awkward silence with a disgruntled stare 'S...Sorry for my actions that day...and thank YOU for saving my life Shehenshah!'

'You are welcome' he saluted her. He was then about to walk away in his characteristic manner with a grin that obviously read I-won-again!

She couldn't believe it! He'd MADE her apologize AND thank him, without a single hint of obligation towards her.

'Shehenshah!' she uttered loudly. The unwitting queen stood up and swayed around to counter this game he'd started.

A-A-R-G-H!

She'd forgotten about her injury. Her abrupt movements had caused the smarting pangs to return - with a vengeance!

She sat back on her divan, wincing aloud.

'You are impulsive, Begum Jodha' he muttered as he noticed her suffer the repercussions of her careless actions

'Only around you...'

The hostile couple paused there for a second. In her grievance, she'd uttered more than she'd intended to.

Quickly attempting to recover from her slip-up, Jodha addressed him with a bitter glare 'Shehenshah...I was hoping the Hakim baba would be here now since you require me to be fit to travel by tomorrow... forgive me...but, can I request you to please...'

'Shhh!' he gently shushed her as he placed his sword on the ground and came up to stand right behind her. She watched in horror as he leaned over to study the bruise - barely a hair's breadth away from her. She turned to glare at him. His eyes were soft as he gazed back into her guarded eyes. While she sat agape, Jalal arched over to peruse through the array of medicinal bowls placed on the dresser in front of them. Casually grabbing a small bowl of medicinal oil, he concocted his own mixture by dropping a pinch of few herbs into it - aware of the startled look on her face while he did so.

Dabbing a tiny bit of fresh muslin into it, he returned to revert his undivided attention to her.

'W...what..a..are you..d..doing S...Shehenshah' the exasperated Jodha muttered 'I...I...can take care...of...myself..'

'Ssshhh!'

As he drew near her, she could feel her heart racing faster and faster. The intensifying flutter she felt was stranger than anything she'd ever experienced.

Proceeding to squeeze four drops of the herbal oil on her wound, Jalal looked up at her ashen face to gauge her reaction. He was so close, she could smell the fragrance of attar in his silky hair - so close, he could almost feel her silky skin. Mortified, Jodha shut her eyes and looked away. He couldn't help smiling to himself.

While Jodha struggled to fathom her escalating restlessness, she was left a confounded mess. Gradually, she felt his lips come close to her shoulder. She didn't know what the king intended to do, but she didn't dare open her eyes. She wanted to revolt but words failed to escape her parched lips - all she did was sit limp. She wanted to resist his charms, but the naive queen knew not how to. The unfamiliar sensation of his heavy breath beside her ears - his lips next to her skin - had roused a passion, she didn't know existed within her.- I could totally imagine this and on top of that i had tingling feeling.lol.

Just when she thought she could take it no longer - she suddenly sensed a cool breeze brush past her bruise. Much as she couldn't stand the fire burning inside her, the relief his actions were giving her injured skin was so soothing!

He continued tenderly blowing on her gash, her bare shoulders, her soft neck - revelling in the rare proximity he was enjoying with her. He watched her heightening anxiety with a teasing grin - no doubt, his vulnerable queen appeared as endearing as could be!

Then, he stopped - with no warning whatsoever.

Alarmed, Jodha was abruptly drawn out of her stupor. Her breath flustered, the seething queen immediately stood up and faced him - her troubled frowns reflecting how far she'd been disturbed by his audacity. She despised what he'd just done, but she despised herself far more for having LET it happen.

He; on the other hand, was as composed as before! He'd witnessed a glimpse of the effect he had on her. He had no complains.

'S...she...shehenshah...' she stuttered as she glared at him indignantly

'Begum Jodha' he calmly interrupted what he knew was going to be a tirade 'The stinging pain must have reduced now'

She was aghast - she couldn't refute him there!

He continued with a perceptive smile 'If you were in Agra...Badi Ammi, Ammi Jaan or Khwaja Shera would have used such herbs and measures to ensure your speedy recovery...the maids here might not be as well-versed...'

Just as he nonchalantly reached out to pick his sword and make his departure, she interrupted him with a curt tone. She couldn't let him get away with it again!

'S..shehenshah... y...y...you... you' somehow expressing her reservations suddenly seemed more difficult than she thought!

'Yes Begum'

'What you just did was not appropriate...you went back on your words...you said you wouldn't ... wouldnt...'

'Wouldn't?'

His cynical smiles were so disquieting. She glanced away to regroup herself 'That you wouldn't touch me...and yet...'

He folded his hands once again 'TOUCH you Begum Jodha? You tend to shift blame on me so conveniently' he acted pensive 'Hmmm...let's see...the other day, you tripped in your chamber - YOU held me...few days ago when in pain, YOU grabbed my wrist...'

While she stood still - shocked by his list of insinuations, he continued with a teasing smile 'Even now' he paused 'I didn't touch you for an instant...did I?'

Cornered and speechless Jodha could say little else, as Jalal offered her his characteristic salutation and walked off from her muted presence thereafter - his pride still intact!



lashy thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#82
Thank you sooo much udayamanyata, daisydee, barbie and snigdha 🤗
Posted: 11 years ago
#83
oye!! you updated??!!!...runs to read...🥳
Posted: 11 years ago
#84


PART 4 - On her road to recovery...

interesting turn of events. The beginning bit made me cringe 🥺 i could almost see the big needle and hot water right besides Jodha! I had a similar thought but it was typical filmy one where Jalal get's wounded and Jodha attends to him in middle of a dense forest!!. This is much better and suits our tigress!

The whole idea of Jodha saving Jalal's life is interesting, i loved how things unfolded after that. Jodha being Jodha will always have the most negative thought about Jalal in any given circumstance. In MotiBhai's absence it's good to know Jodha was made aware of the current situation.

Lashy, you have understood Ekta's Jodha so well...the 1st thought she has after coming to her sense is her anger on Jalal's lack of appreciation and his snide remarks on her family!😉

PART 5 - Unfamiliar emotions

Lashy - you're a darling! 🤗🤗 this is my favourite part. Awww how i can only imagine these two getting so close!!

Would love to see the below scene take place b/w J & J. RT & PS will do a splendid job. Beautiful writing!!😛

Surveying her expressions in the mirror, he questioned with mock innocence 'Why, have I not done something I should be doing Begum Jodha?' He knew precisely what she was expecting.

'Shehenshah...if you do not have any appreciation for my actions, the least you could do is NOT taunt me for them...' she mumbled in annoyance 'Anyway, I was wrong to expect ANY gratefulness from you...'

'Appreciation? Gratefulness?' he shrugged lightly 'For what?'

'For having saved your life, of course!' she'd nearly yelled there

He hadn't realized how far he'd missed having glimpses of her flaming temperament the past few days. There was no question he was enjoying this. Folding his hands, Jalal gazed at her with an air of authority 'From what I remember, I'd specifically asked you NOT to go out on your own...you disobeyed me...so, you want me to appreciate that?' he broke out into a subtle smile 'Besides, 'I' was the one who'd saved YOUR life...and I don't recollect YOU thanking ME for it either...'

There was a long pause in the room - very long! The frustrated queen looked away from his wry stares. Whichever way she debated it, he still had a point!


this is the Jodha i was looking for, even though she hates the Emperor, doesn't agree with his actions... she knows how to place her displeasure before him. It's not over the top lecturing where the words are much sharper than Jalal's sword!

thank you...it was a pleasure reading!!!
😳
leelu0001 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#85
amazing update, loved the scene where jalaal tends to her wounds
Super Kool thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#86
Lovely update, lashy...forget jodha, even my heart fluttered reading the part where jalal tends her wound...jalal again surprised jodha...the young queen's dilemma and confusion are multiplying by the minute...😳

I love this ss...bas keh diya...😊😆
Edited by Super Kool - 11 years ago
lashy thumbnail
20th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 11 years ago
#87

Originally posted by: ashpat

first of all thank you so much for giving such a gr8 chapter. I loved it when they wanted to win over each other. The bolded parts are my fav and few comments in red.

Please don't end this ss and if u do then plzzz start a new one soon. You are an amazing and fantastic writer.👏👏👏

While Jodha struggled to fathom her escalating restlessness, she was left a confounded mess. Gradually, she felt his lips come close to her shoulder. She didn't know what the king intended to do, but she didn't dare open her eyes. She wanted to revolt but words failed to escape her parched lips - all she did was sit limp. She wanted to resist his charms, but the naive queen knew not how to. The unfamiliar sensation of his heavy breath beside her ears - his lips next to her skin - had roused a passion, she didn't know existed within her.- I could totally imagine this and on top of that i had tingling feeling.lol.


He folded his hands once again 'TOUCH you Begum Jodha? You tend to shift blame on me so conveniently' he acted pensive 'Hmmm...let's see...the other day, you tripped in your chamber - YOU held me...few days ago when in pain, YOU grabbed my wrist...'

While she stood still - shocked by his list of insinuations, he continued with a teasing smile 'Even now' he paused 'I didn't touch you for an instant...did I?'

Awww thank you sooo much ashpat...and to think that my story had the same effect on you that Jalal had on Jodha in the scene is my absolute pleasure...

Part 6 is the last...and I am getting busy after that...but will try and see if I get ideas after that...

Thanks once again ashpat 🤗

lashy thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#88
Thank you sooo much leelu🤗

@Kai

interesting turn of events. The beginning bit made me cringe 🥺 i could almost see the big needle and hot water right besides Jodha! I had a similar thought but it was typical filmy one where Jalal get's wounded and Jodha attends to him in middle of a dense forest!!. This is much better and suits our tigress!

I realized this scene was not for the faint-hearted...however, bearing in mind the kind of Jalal we have in the serial (a far more serious hardened brute than the docile Prithvi we know) unless it was something major, a profound effect couldn't have been made on him...fussing over a few scratches would not suit him...😆

Besides, that's how treatments were done in those days anyway...oh blessed anaesthesia! 😭

The whole idea of Jodha saving Jalal's life is interesting, i loved how things unfolded after that. Jodha being Jodha will always have the most negative thought about Jalal in any given circumstance. In MotiBhai's absence it's good to know Jodha was made aware of the current situation.

Awww thank you sweetie

Lashy, you have understood Ekta's Jodha so well...the 1st thought she has after coming to her sense is her anger on Jalal's lack of appreciation and his snide remarks on her family!😉

I did take this from the serial (they're not a figment of my imagination) so tried staying a bit true to character

PART 5 - Unfamiliar emotions

Lashy - you're a darling! 🤗🤗 this is my favourite part. Awww how i can only imagine these two getting so close!!
It took me a while to write those scenes and imagining PARIJAT while writing it brought about a few *flutters* in me too...(now even RTMC didn't have that effect on me😲)...btw, having two toddlers running around when you're concentrating on a romantic scene doesn't really help..I had to keep lifting my laptop and scooting off to an empty room...😆

Would love to see the below scene take place b/w J & J. RT & PS will do a splendid job. Beautiful writing!!😛
This is the Jodha i was looking for, even though she hates the Emperor, doesn't agree with his actions... she knows how to place her displeasure before him. It's not over the top lecturing where the words are much sharper than Jalal's sword! Yes...you and I seem to be the only ones around here sharing this sentiment of a *middle-ground* me thinks😕...while few hate her altogether, most others are pretty happy with her manner of getting back at him i.e. shouting...
thank you...it was a pleasure reading!!!
And it was such a pleasure being read...by you, of course😳

Edited by lashy - 11 years ago
kamla1 thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#89
The most wonderful written update I ever read for any of the serials or episodes. Such a command of language and beautiful narration of the episode, I think WU is better than the actual show. The writer has a great future as author or Novelist.
smile.sara thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#90
Lashy !!!!. my dear ...🤗🤗🤗 multiply these hugs with 100... so awesome yaar...abhi i just read 3 ch...but it is breath taking...👏

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