CHAPTER FOUR:
THE INDIGO MIDNIGHT
"He created man from clay like [that of] pottery. And He created the jinn from a smokeless flame of fire. So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny? [He is] Lord of the two sunrises and Lord of the two sunsets. So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?"
(Surah Ar-Rehman)
She leaned across the window, her heart still in dithering deluge. Her gaze trekked through the window, settling in the cobalt sky. She felt the squashy frozen gentle wind stroking her face, the touch made her feel revived. Finally there was a moon today, which beamed with a potent radiance. She had been waiting for days now to just let her eyes be feasted with the 'otherworldly' preserved sight of that divine body. How serene it looked, perched on the doors of heaven and embellished with countless stars that were in performance playing hide and seek in the erratic clouds. The world had plummeted in a tranquil slumber unlike her heart that was rampant with a blizzard of the black wintry night.
The moon skated across the sky progressing towards its mystifying destination. She found an arresting resemblance in their existence. They both were peripatetic in the search of their destination past the endless spaces, obscurities and anonymity. Only that the moon would soon absolute its expedition of seeking, it knew where its destination lied and she... even though she was aware of the gazebo of her destination she did not know if she could ever be there...in peace. She was a submerged vagrant navigating the paths that lengthened ahead, walking and walking oblivious to the paths but on tenterhooks to reach a concluding summit at sometime... someday. Isn't this what life was?
She placed a hand on her heart and experienced the pulsation. Her heart drummed under the touch of her hand, but wasn't this what it was hypothetical to do? Beat. Beat rapid or measured, beat strong or frail but beat. It was executing its job but then why she felt her heart was betraying her? It was installing the dynamism and life in her for which it was crafted. It was reputing its oath of labor. Then who was she to stamp it today with the censure of treachery, a vice-like treachery blatant of jading her?
So was it really going out of the line?
Or was it just the eeriness of her mind?
Was she reading too much between the lines?
With the next gust of wind that fanned her, making her hair flow around her, his face flashed in her mind. She turned away massaging her temples to trail away the flashes. Her head throbbed gushingly, the veins ticking erroneously. Wanting an escapade from the redundant thoughts and the caramel scrutinizing eyes of a certain someone she gave in to the memoirs she held onto.
The lone pebble pirouetted on the surface of the lavender blue millpond engendering ripples in the water which started from a center and swelled around in concentric circles. How inconsequential that motion seemed? The pebble bought no radical change in the water body mirroring its trifling nature. The ripples spreading around at one point died out altogether.
"It's alarming how a small pebble of no profound characteristic weight and foundation can cause such supple and unvoiced pandemonium. Aren't you reflecting the same?"
"How does it even matter? The uproar dies anyway."
"But do you, my dear child, mull over the act of a single pebble restraining the power of vitalizing the particles of water it doesn't even stumbles upon? The energy it spawns... its motion does dies but not the effect. The energy of the universe never dies...that's why they call it the undying universe'."
It was ironical how the undying universe with each vivacious tick of the clock brought the death of a mortal. The path was recurring. Rounding about, connecting and disconnecting, every now and then, super positioning, layering, grafting but observing the equilibrium nevertheless.
Allah is merciful even when He is wrathful. Allah is all powerful and he holds this universe without the tiniest bit of an effort in an absolute calm yet a storm. He is absolute, ubiquitous, all-knowing and the supreme.
"Khushi? You haven't slept yet?" A voice from behind tumbled her back in the present she was existing in.
She turned back with a lazy smile and a flicker in her eyes. "No Di. Sleep has avowed on eluding me. "
"Volleying some minutes to talk?" She inquired, limping her way in. Dipping on the bed she fleeced the duvet around her.
"You need to ask that, really now? How come you are here at this time? That husband of yours must be basking around in plethora of fanatic expeditions substituted by his sleep. He is asleep, right?"
"No, he is out of town. Had a lot of work" Anjali breathed, un-fazed, low volatility summing up her expressions even as she tried to not let the smile evaporate.
"Pity the fireworks won't make it to the tabloids, decade old news Di. You have some crispy new ones to trophy?" Khushi slurred, whooshing her hand in the air.
"Fireworks, Aloha?" She enthused amiably.
"Your strained happy-go-lucky performance won't do with me. Your mental notes are marked with quotients of the catastrophic acts you endeavor to pull in front of me. Why even attempt Di?" Khushi articulated, rounding back to stare out in the hilly murkiness sourced by the dark night, as the moon slid behind the lonely gray cloud, a cloud which veiled the moonlight in its wake even though it had so tiny an existence when confronted with the entirety and gigantism of the very good moon.
"Hakuna Matata, Aloha. You burn your time and calories blowing on this topic. You are already skinny enough; incise the getting-skinner exercise."
"That phrase isn't applicable to your standards, you know that."
"And it is to yours? Reallocate this focus to the backseat. I am here for something else, I am here to talk about him not myself?"
"Him? Who is the magnificent him now? Don't tell me Payal has excavated another him' from 100 feet underground?! Even if she has you should be rocketing with this topic on her head not mine."
"The humor is lost on both of us, Miss Disastrous Humor." Payal cheered, hopping merrily to the bed and draping her hands around Anjali.
"How are you, Di?" She asked.
"Hale and hearty as ever. I can see you are in auxiliary spirits."
"Oh yes, very much. The handsome hunk, Di! You should have seen him." She exclaimed, jumping beside Anjali to sit, the erupting exhilaration seeping out. Khushi rolled her eyes visibly, setting herself upon the window ledge.
"I did see him and he is the boy I referred to earlier."
"You did! So, what do you think? You felt warmth traveling all over you right? The jittery feeling? Shame Di. Don't forget you are married!" Payal guffawed, punching Anjali lightly on her shoulder.
"Who can ever defeat you on the arena of drama queens, ma lutine?" Khushi mocked, eyeing Payal, rankled.
"At least I am not a spoilsport, Melancholia!"
"I can understand your point! Di, ask her to not mess up with me. I am not first-rate in my brains right now."
"When are you ever first-rate in your brains, Melancholia? Oh wait I know the reason for this disturbed state. ASR right?"
"His name is Arnav, not ASR!"
"Ooohhh!!! Did you hear, Di? Our melancholia is falling for someone. Watch your step!" She winked conspiratorially at Khushi.
"There is nothing like this. Stop making a mountain out of molehill Payal!" Khushi huffed, taking measured step towards the bed with pauses in her clarifications.
"Enough both of you! I am not here to get my ears grazed with your dim-witted fights. Sit, Khushi." Anjali spoke aloud, ending their altercations.
"Yes, Di." Khushi agreed, sliding in the blanket her back supported by the headboard.
"Ummm Di. Witticism covers higher grounds for me, I agree. But Khushi is an exception and an expert; I even saw her belly dancing with witticism on Mount Albert. How can you call her dim-witted?" Payal expressed, in pure horror and the next split second as she saw Khushi's mouth forming a perfect O she rolled over in convulsive laughter clutching her stomach. "And you call me a drama queen!" She accused, her words sounded somewhat incoherent in between the chortles.
"Payal enough now." Anjali commanded her sternly. "Discover some decency. It is beyond horrible for a girl to laugh like this. Who would marry such a wanton and loud girl like you? You want to practice celibacy, with this attitude of yours?"
"N...No. Don't say that Di!" Payal cried out in dreadfulness, the aspect gobbling her up. Her eyes, as big as saucers, glazed over, apparently traveling to some other world where the outrageous statements uttered by Anjali were already in action.
"No!" She shouted, covering her ears and eyes.
"Back at you, lutine!" Khushi shouted. "Look at your face, Despo!" And with that they both flipped over, laughter wrecking their bodies as they continued guffawing. Hilarity, perceptibly, trudging on their faces.
"You both are so mean!" Payal shouted as she came out of the shock. She threw a pillow at Khushi which she faultlessly caught just in time.
"Look who is talking." Khushi whistled, winking at Payal.
"Whatever. And you Di! You are always siding with you pretty lovely Aloha. You don't care for me!" Payal complained, feigning hurtful expressions.
"All of us are aware of the truth. Now back to the main topic. Who was that boy, Aloha?"
"Di, not you too please! What's so interesting in him anyway? He is just another man. A walking man? Like million others? Rings a bell?" Khushi stated aggravated to the core.
"So he is a man now not a boy?" Payal teased, wiggling her eyebrows.
"I saw him with you by the door. I want to know the story. Start without protests. They won't take you to any sanctuary."
"Yes! I want details too!" Payal interjected, clapping her hands together.
Khushi pressed her head along the headboard, knowing there was no escape now. They both were copiously objective on pursuing the matter she had been trying so hard to evade. She exhaled a sudden rush of gelid breath as the pair of caramel molten eyes sparked in her mind, the intensity vivid and dissecting.
*
The fire in the cinders frizzled with crackling noise as it assailed the dry part of the timber. The sizzling flickers sputtered around, instantly fading in the air like they never existed. The spark arresters alternated between attaining a burning reddish orange color and the original color of its metal. The heat from the fire bestowed the area a toasty and mellow ambiance. The incandescent light from the bulbs in the glass recesses formed shadows in the opposite direction as the atmosphere geared up with yellow tinges.
He continued watching the fiery fire dance, rebelling, extinguishing and then again blazing in irregular summits. His gaze was strikingly unwavering, holding the fire captive in its steely imprisonment. The fire which was serving a sentence of a prisoner of war, a war that was turbulent in him. In his heart and mind.
"Where are you lost, dude?" NK inquired, plopping on the bean bag with a cup of hot chocolate in his hands.
"Nowhere." Arnav answered, staring in the cracking fireplace.
"It's so cold here. I think one day you would end up entering my room and finding a frozen mummy instead in my bed. I am validly in awe of your astuteness. Couldn't you work out a better time of the year to pay your regal visit here?" NK sardonically questioned, incessantly sipping on his share, savoring each mouthful.
"You shouldn't have come then, NK. I wasn't dying to cement your presence to myself." Arnav replied, his tone cutting.
"Chill dude! Now you are being mean. Where is Akash?" NK added, circumventing the subject.
"I don't know."
"This is your problem ASR. You don't know anything most of the time. Scratch that. You don't know anything all the time. All you know or all you can now about is a sexy girl at hand not that my penchant is too stumpy for sexy girls."
Sexy girl, the words registered unwillingly in his deadlocked mind, revitalizing it.
As a rejoinder of NK's words, which had sunken into him, her face materialized out of nowhere in front of his eyes, all smiling and buoyant. He hindered his sight forcing close his eyes, scrunching his teeth under the irrepressible sensations that were wriggling inside and outside of his body. But her vision stayed there as vivid as before for it was the illusion of his mind and not his sight.
"What's wrong, ASR? You seem disturbed." NK inquired, his voice communicating the anxiousness he felt for his friend.
"It's nothing NK. Bless me and go to sleep. I would fancy some seclusion." He requested, even though the authority remained too evident in it.
"We are used to your rudeness ASR. I pity the girl who would be enduring the whole of you for the rest of her life someday. You need to reduce the quota of your rudeness. No marvel people generally recoil away from you. You fire your discourteous bullets at them without any forewarning." NK lashed out. Even though no traces of reluctance or repentance flickered across his immobile face he instantly felt bad. He could actually sense the troubled vibes springing from Arnav.
"What gave you the impression I'd be tying down to some girl for life?" He grunted.
"You are hopeless. I am just waiting for Akash. We were planning to bring down the records of Pink Panther today." He added for his benefit more than Arnav's, it wouldn't have made any difference to him.
"Okay." He replied footing down from his bean bag and the next instant he strode away.
ASR was the biggest unpredictable and impasse man there could be, Nk sighed, brushing his head sideways in disbelief. He returned back to his hot chocolate, fixing the ear-piece of his I Pod in his ears as the loud notes of 'wrecking ball' issued forth.
*
"You skipped the details! I know you did! Don't start with the back-biting is a sin' lecture. I know there is more to the meeting then you are letting on." Payal accused, her eyes forming slits.
"How does it even matter Payal?" Khushi groaned, almost readying to tow out her hair.
"But melancholia you..."
"Don't force her too much now Payal. Let her be." Anjali interjected.
"Fine Di! But tell me how did you find ASR? For the record, melancholia before you pin-point again, I could feel he doesn't like others calling him Arnav so I am going to call him ASR. I want to be top-listed in his good books unlike you." Payal disputed with Khushi, defiance written all over her face.
She turned back towards Anjali, "Hot in looks, haina?! Too hot! I felt the need to fan myself. It's good I am a master at composure in front of handsome hot charmers. Else, he would have known how bloody effected I was." She exclaimed, fanning herself with her hands.
"Jesus Christ Payal! You are a lost case. There is no redemption for you." Anjali expressed in disbelief.
"There is redemption for everyone only if one devotedly wants to redeem oneself." Khushi uttered in a trance, lost in searching the patterns on her hands.
"It was a punch line Khushi!" Payal shook her.
"What? Sorry. I didn't mean to say it out loud. It was a thought to myself." Khushi apologized looking at them.
"I understand." Anjali acknowledged with a smile. "Go to sleep now both of you."
"You are tucking in here tonight, right?"
"Yes."
"Yayy! Sleep is out of scene then! We are going to talk boys! There is this other handsome guy I saw in the market, though not as handsome as Arrnavvv." She slurred, sticking her tongue out at Khushi to which Khushi pouted, knowing there was no point in arguing with Payal. The girl had the mistaken unyielding nerve of not backing down.
"He wore glasses. Can you both believe this! I found a bespectacled boy hot and I always claimed glasses a total no never for my guy!"
As Payal ranted on, Anjali passed Khushi a reassuring smile swarming with the love she held for her, the twinkle in her eyes and the beam on her face conversed a thousand comprehensionss to Khushi, and she knew Anjali understood a part of the turmoil that cling to her.
All because of a caramel eyed man.
*
He couldn't sleep.
F*ck this world, He swore for the umpteenth time flitting to the other side of the bed. He had ended up trouncing about the entire night in the bed and ambling around the back garden in which the doors of his bedroom opened. The chill of the night had been triumphant in anesthetizing his body but failed miserably in calming his mind.
This trip is doomed. He decided throwing off his blanket from over him. He walked over to the doors and into the patchy garden.
The morning had partially risen. There was going to be no sun today, he knew the warmth was lost. Yesterday had been a propitious day or else when did the sun easily show its existence in the chilly winters of Colorado? The influx of sun yesterday had been a phenomenon in itself. Even amidst that nature and magnificence, he was at a fail of retrieving the missing peace.
Was there even a shred of peace in the entire universe? He thought.
As he turned to go back inside his eyes caught sight of the source of his disturbed state. Thinking about peace, was he? His heart fell under the duress of a slow calm beat as he stood there drinking the sight in, peace enveloping him from every direction.
Udne Ki Aasha
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