Posted:
TRUTH
After informing Shivaay about the completed and signed Bareilly land deal, I sit in my car listening to some Altaf Raja kind of music on the radio along with the driver Dandi screaming the song at the top of his voice... "Tum Toh Thehre Pardesi ... Saath Kya Nibhaaoge ... Tum Toh Agli Gaadi Se Ghar Ko Laut Jaaoge ..." Yeah I am going back home but why would he sing such a song for me?
He suddenly stopped the car seeing a herd of cows, the cows were leisurely enjoying their morning walk, we had to wait for some time. I took out my wallet and gave a few notes to Dandi ... " Aaj tumhe akele hi khana khana padega! " I say in a comical tone and even he starts giggling recalling our so funny lunchtimes together for the past one week. Dandi was struggling to make a living, he behaved like an idiot many a times but he is a kind man ... I know.
" Pata hain Saahabji!!!" Dandi exclaimed after taking the money from my hand and keeping it in his pocket. I smiled hopelessly waiting for some fresh gossip... He has told me many things about the Dhongi Pandit of the Shiv Mandir, about the Different couples he sees in the Loveria Garden, about Kishan Kaka's Bhains Jhumri who recently delivered a calf and about how Wives beat their drunkard husbands in the middle of the road ... What might be coming up today?
"Aajna Thakur Saahab ki haveli pe Daawat hain Daawat! Unki Shaadi hain na aaj isiliye." Dandi informed me casually but the blood in the passage of my veins thickened, I could feel heaviness in my chest ... Tears stung in my eyes ... Thinking about the vile woman ... Namely Gauri because of whom Jahnvi Thakurein set herself on fire ... A beautiful face with the brain of a criminal, a disgusting disguise she is.
"Toh woh Kali Thakur uss do takke ki ladki se Shaadi karega?" I asked him equally casual.
"Arre saahab Kali Thakur hi nahi ... Uske chaaro Bhai bhi uss Gauri se shaadi karenge ... Aur do takke ki nahi poore ke poore teen lakh ki hai woh ... Uske chacha ne poora daam liya hain uska!" Iwas not able to register what ever Dandi had just said right now.
"Are you sure? Tumhe yeh sab kaise pata?" I questioned restlessly.
"Arre yeh toh sabko pata hain!" Dandi was worried seeing the expression on my face.
"Woh apni marzi se Kali Thakur ke pass uski Haveli me nahi ruki thhi?" I asked wiping the beads of sweat off my forehead.
"Nahi Nahi Saahab, Uss kamine kaali ne uski maa ko maar diya phir usse bandi banake rakha." Dandi told me with a lowered head.
I have the guilt from living with all that, accepting it for so long, for bumbling along like a God damn sheep. Thanks to all my prolonged experiences that i considered Gauri to be a keep, a mistress and more than anything else a gold digger. How could I?When the guilt comes it takes me down the old familiar path. I want to refuse to walk it, pretend that I am the person I demand that I be. I want to see myself in sepia tones, not perfect colour. I want to scrub my head, but if I did I'd never learn from what happened. And it's true what they say, "Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it. And I couldn't bare that. I have actually not been my usual gentlemanly self whenever it came to dealing with Gauri in the few times we interacted but I desperately want to help her now ... I have to go and find her ... "Gauri!" My heart tearfully called for her ...
And she came running from one side off the road after a big stone hit and broke one of the windows of my car ... I saw that the cows were long gone but she was running for life ... I stepped out of my car immediately to see her hurt and bleeding body ... Feet bruised by the still tightened chains ... She came running towards me and I had to hold her ... She was panting for breathe ... Tired, exhausted and Aching.
There was something solemn deep within her eyes. The stunning, deep black held a truth that her face could not hide. The despairing chill that they conveyed made me feel heartbroken. I looked away; I couldn't bear it. What was usually strength, now showed weakness. What used to be joy now showed grief. I was the one misjudging her as being happy in the name of her wedding. Then a tear rolled down her cheek which she wiped immediately. I didn't see it, but could feel him crying beside me. I thought of what had happened.
As much as she tried to hold it in, the pain came out like an uproar from her throat in the form of a silent scream. The beads of water started falling down one after another, without a sign of stopping. She hit me and tried to scream, but her voice was melted by the sound of the place. She tried to free herself and run away from me but how could I let her go ... I had to talk to her ... I had to apologize. The muffled sobs wracked against her chest. The world turned into a blur, and so did all the sounds. The taste. The smell. Everything was gone. The last painful emotion slammed against her before she lost the feeling of feeling.
"Aap chhod dijiye humme ... Aur jaaiyye yaha se ... Yeh log humme maarna chahte hain ... Aapko bhi chot pohocha sakte hain ... Jaiiyee..." She was still struggling not to cry ... Trying to help me, a person who thought and spoke so low about her.
Her emotions were not easily hidden on her innocent face. Her pain was evident in the crease of her tensed brow and the sad down-curve of her full lips. But her eyes, her eyes showed her soul. They were a deep pool of restless gold, an ocean of hopeless grief. As I looked into her eyes I knew, all the beauty of the universe could not even hope to compete with this simple thing: passion. Passion turned her eyes into orbs of the brightest fire, and in them I read clearly that she would fight to the very last tear for her life. She would not let the world break her. Sure she could cry, but she would never let them take her true self from her. She clung to it with passion. Passion that made her beautiful.
I saw Dandi throwing stones at some of the goons ... I immediately pulled Gauri behind me and tried to save her from a man who was about to hit her with an iron rod ... I WILL SAVE THIS WOMAN,WHAT COME MAY...
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