OS || The Cupcake Catastrophe

The Cupcake Catastrophe

Author's Note: This is a crack-fic, you all. I wrote it in three hours, and it most probably does not make much sense. It's kind of a sequel to Cake even though I haven't finished it yet! This is just designed to be some sort of light-hearted fun, to help you cope with the major angst coming up on the show! Hope the humour isn't too lame! And beware, this is nearly 4000 words, so it's a long one! 😆

Genre: Humour/Family/Mild Romance

Pairings: ShivIka/Shivaay Singh Oberoi x Annika Shivaay Singh Oberoi | RiKara/ Omkara Singh Oberoi x Gauri Omkara Singh Oberoi | RumYa/ Rudra Singh Oberoi x Saumya Rudra Singh Oberoi | PriVeer/ Priyanka Singh Randhawa x Ranveer Singh Randhawa [Ft. TejVi]

Rating: Mature Audiences [Sexual References]

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Tej Singh Oberoi was hungry.

As he sat up in bed, taking immense care not to disturb his wife, he wondered about his options. Now, if he had wanted to be the least bit observant, he could have swiveled 90 degrees to his left, and eaten the exquisite fruit platter, and digestive biscuits that Jhanvi kept explicitly for nights like these. But, to be frank, he loathed those sawdust dry, biscuits, and to add to the travesty, there were no pineapples on the fruit platter which were practically the only fruit he ate.

Thus, here he was, hungry.

He contemplated waking his wife up for ideas but the sight of her peacefully sleeping form stirred something unspoken within him, and he decided against it. Fluffing up his pillow, he was about to slide back underneath the covers to join her, when

There were those gourmet cupcakes in the fridge...

How had he forgotten about the cupcakes?

It was the biannual Oberoi Industries success bash tomorrow, and his wife and sister-in-law had invited the crme de la crme of society to celebrate the event. Their business was thriving in the hands of the younger generation, even more so, than it had been when it was only he and Shakti looking after the company. Shivaay, had remained just as Shivaay had one of the brightest, and most astute young businessmen in the world, but it was the other three that had surprised them all. Omkara had branched the corporation out into a more creative element wherein, they were now looking at owning five different architectural firms around the world, even trumping the Chaudhary Rana Group's business (that satisfied him a great deal more than he let on). Rudra, the Oberoi brother that everyone had underestimated, had turned out to have the prized, Oberoi business blood, after all. He, alongside his eldest brother, had opened up an activewear corporation, linked to Oberoi Industries, that was giving Nike and Adidas trouble. And his daughter, his overspoilt but sweetspoken Priyanka, now owned a fashion house, that she founded, with her sister-in-law, Gauri.

In all senses, the children he had been so doubtful of for years were now making him the proudest father, that he had ever seen himself.

Annika's independent event management company, Feut et Glace was taking care of the party. It had been a social statement, to have the most successful events business organising but very little people knew that the eldest Oberoi daughter-in-law owned it, because she had wanted it that way. She had always been independent, and even after getting married to a billionaire, had not changed that.

Always hands on, Annika had spent hours in the kitchen, cooking herself. The family had helped, in small ways or another, but Shivaay and Rudra had practically lived in the kitchen with her. It was the cupcakes, though, that had struck everyone's attention.

Nearly everyone in the family had a sweet tooth, and when they had seen the preparation of some of the most exotic cupcakes on earth, happening in their kitchen there had been mass hysteria. The whole family had gathered around the living room, when the eldest daughter-in-law of the family had carted the exquisite cakes in, to show them the finished product.

They barely payed attention to Annika talking about all of them being alcoholic cakes, and that the family was limited to one each because she didn't want anyone to get diabetes. All anyone could do, was think about the gorgeous cupcakes long after she had called her staff to deliver them to the freezers, in their store kitchens.

Tej could remember every single detail of the four different types of cake, that she had shown them. He, himself, had fantasized about eating them all one by one (with proper manners, though once an Oberoi, always an Oberoi!). There had been the Biscoff and Kahlua, triple chocolate cupcakes that had immediately drawn his son-in-law's attention. They were dark and decadent, just like him, after all. Then, the beautiful raspberry and mascarpone cupcakes, with the ros infused cream, that had set his wife, sister-in-law and Rudra into a tailspin. Omkara had had to restrain Gauri when she had set her eyes on the vanilla-rum buttercreams, that had been topped decadently with dulce de leche and candied bananas. And, he had overheard Annika whispering to Saumya, the red-velvet cupcakes, with the Godiva chocolate liqueur soak, had been specially made because Shivaay loved them. Indeed, his eldest son looked almost entranced by the sight of the last set.

And so formed the most perfect batch of cupcakes, that Oberoi Mansion had ever seen.

His wife had caught the maniacal glint in his eyes, almost before he had, himself. Jhanvi had crisply told him, as soon as they had retired to their bedroom, that he was not allowed to touch a single crumb of cake. Apparently, the idea had been unearthed by his sister-in-law (who was always out to ruin him, it seemed.), who had placed the same ban on his poor brother, as well.

Shakti had diabetes, so it only made sense that he wasn't allowed to eat dessert. But why did that automatically transfer onto him, as well? He didn't have diabetes (just coronary heart disease, and cholesterol, but never mind that!). But no matter how much he tried to remind his wife of this, Jhanvi refused to budge.

And for all his adamance, he had decided against indulging in the fight. So he wasn't pleased, but he could live cupcake less, giving his younger brother some company. But then, this stupid midnight surge of hunger had gone and ruined things, and now that they were back on his mind, they wouldn't goddamn leave.

No one would miss a few, would they?

There had been over five hundred cupcakes made, so surely, if some were to get shifted around no one would notice. Plus, he knew how terrible Annika was at mathematic, and despite all that Shivaay had tried to teach her to everyone's pity, their beloved daughter-in-law had not improved in the slightest. For once, he was glad.

And even if Shivaay or Saumya did notice, Tej thought with satisfaction, he would never be considered the culprit.

It would most definitely be blamed on Rudra who was widely known for his obsession with cake. If one racked their brains, Gauri may have helped as well, because she had seemed kind of obsessed with the cupcakes that morning. And one could as far as to even blame Annika, who liked to indulge in dessert, more than she did, normal food.

Yes, Tej smirked internally, no one would ever doubt him.

And for him, that practically sealed the deal. As quietly as he could, he slipped out of bed, tucking his wife under the comforter soundly before he left. With a spring to his step, Tej felt the familiar rush that he only felt during business deals, roll over him. He was ever the businessman, and so he was determined in his stance, come hell or high water.

Even if it was to steal cupcakes.

***

Animatedly whistling on his way to the kitchen, he almost didn't notice the shadows. As aforementioned, he was a businessman (and a good one at that) who had been taught to look for the fine print. To observe the otherwise unseen.

So, he didn't miss the two shadows, ominously large, that were standing in the middle of the Oberoi back lawn. Usually, the door to the back lawns were locked shut, especially to stop intruders in the form of wild animals, trying to come in and ruin his mother's precious rose bushes. But tonight, they were most obviously occupied.

Heart thudding, he snuck a look at his watch and nearly reeled it was nearly 12:30. Trying to ignore the annoying memory of his youngest son and eldest daughter-in-law trying to convince him that 12am 1am was the devil's hour, Tej picked up the nearest crystalline vase and quietly edged towards the back lawn door which had been left ajar.

A burglar?

Squinting, he tried to make out the figures standing outside, from behind the door. He could only make out their silhouettes in the dark, but he could clearly identify one thing.

There was a giant, gaping hole in the grass of their back lawn, and both perpetrators had large shovels in their hands. They appeared to be walking around the hole, occasionally using their shovels to uproot some more grass making the crater even bigger.

Half in rage, and the other in shock, Tej growled under his breath. The idea of two unknown subjects breaking into Oberoi Mansion, and then having the balls to dig a hole in their back yard, was absolutely Ludacris. The idea that despite all of this, the Oberoi security hadn't picked it up was even more shocking.

Khanna, you are so dead.

He made to call their security guards from whatever hellhole they had dug themselves into, but when he reached into the pocket of his kurta, he found that he had left his phone in his bedroom. Unabashedly terrified, he still held the vase in his hand as he made to accost the burglars himself.

But no sooner had he moved out from behind the door, did he see the faces of his youngest son, and his wife. Attached to the bodies of the burglars who were digging a hole in the lawn, of Oberoi Mansion.

Rudra and Saumya were speaking hurriedly, under their breaths their murmurs too quiet for his aging ears to pick up on. Barely suppressing his gasp, Tej was going to go out and yell at the both of them, when he stopped himself. If he made a fuss now, he would create a spectacle in the middle of the night (which was the way his family chose to handle most things!), and then, the cupcakes would be left, uneaten. But, how was one to punish these two, for doing whatever the hell they were doing, without making a fuss? Tej grinned as he quietly locked the back-lawn door, before setting off on his merry way. That would teach them.

Slightly disgruntled, but still mighty pleased with himself, Tej continued along to the kitchen. He hadn't planned to stop after the mild distraction in the back lawn, but curious as ever, he was compelled to, when he heard the strange sounds coming from the storeroom. There was a great deal of banging, and shuffling that he could here and yet again, memories of Rudra and Annika's well-meaning warning about devils, came back to him. Checking his watch, and frowning when it only showed that twenty minutes had passed since he last checked, Tej inched towards the storeroom.

Then, he heard someone speak.

The unmistakable twinkle in her voice automatically characterised it as Annika. But, what was Annika doing in the storeroom, at 1am in the morning, by herself? And what the hell was it with all the banging, and shuffling? He would have gone in and asked her, himself, if it hadn't been for her next words, that changed the course of his actions.

"Shivaay, please. He heard her plead, but all he heard in response, was a gruff grunt. And then more shuffles...and now, a new sound. Panting. Confused as ever, Tej wondered what on Earth was happening but clarity soon came to him, in a shockwave. He heard a gasp, a groan, and then, his usually well-mannered, responsible daughter all but scream out words that had him backing away from the door, in awe.

"I just need you to hold me. He finally heard Shivaay's response, in a hushed of course, love, and his hunch was confirmed. Yes, he and Jhanvi had been adventurous in their days (and Shakti had confirmed the same, on his end as well), but as far as he was aware, no one, no one, in Oberoi history had done it in a storeroom before. Baffled, he murmured the only three words that came to him, in that very moment.

"Oh my mata.

Eyes widening in horror, he scrambled away from the room as fast as he could making a beeline for his own room. Halfway there, however, he stopped. If he had faced so much already, he may as well now reap the benefits right?

Changing his route now, to avoid the back lawns, and a certain storeroom, Tej (now mildly in shock), made his way towards the kitchen again. Everything had been going relatively well, until he heard the distinctive sounds of splashes coming from the poolside. Rolling his eyes, Tej continued on his journey. After all, it was quite a regular occurrence.

By now, the whole family knew of Shivaay and Annika's obsession with water and the fact that more often than not, both resorted to the pool to satisfy their anger. Either Annika would get annoyed and throw Shivaay into the pool, or Shivaay would try to get steamy in the water. It was kind of foul, but according to Rudra and Saumya, that was how his eldest children liked to roll. Silly kids, they're going to get sick...

And then, even though he had told himself that he wouldn't Tej stopped again. Wait a second, he had just heard them in the storeroom, doing...whatever they had been doing! So how the hell where they back in the pool, in the less than two minutes since he had last heard them?

Another burglar?

Clutching his chest in awe and worry, he hurried back towards Shivaay and Annika's bedroom picking up one of Om's sculpture from a sidetable, as he went. Even though he knew that it was past 1am, he couldn't help but think that this night was shaping up to be quite a cursed one. Not for long, though.

Taking a deep breath, he crept towards Shivaay and Annika's bedroom ready to attack the imposters. Only to see Omkara and Gauri submerged into the pool, scrambling in the water as they held each other. Trying to keep his gag reflex in check, he could only bear to stay until he watched his son pick his daughter-in-law up, bridal style. Shuddering, he screwed his eyes shut rushing through the door, before either one noticed that he was there.

He would've gone back to bed then and there, if h hadn't been so stupidly hungry. In fact, now he was ravenous all that running, and jumping had tired his weak heart out. Exhausted, and scarred, Tej just vowed to not stop for anything again. Almost psychotic with determination, he all but charged towards the Oberoi kitchen, only stopping when he realised that he had already been beaten to the prize.

Because, sitting on the kitchen counter was his beloved daughter, and her topless husband. If that wasn't absurd enough, the fact that Ranveer had smears of dark chocolate on his chest, and Priyanka had whipped cream all over her fingers, was.

It didn't take a genius to tell what they were doing,

Tej almost went into cardiac arrest, right in that moment. He and Jhanvi had had their fun with food as well, but to think that his daughter, nave and innocent could even consider having chocolate sex, was enough to make him want to retch.

For once, forgetting about the cupcakes, he turned his head away from the kitchen, and sprinted towards his bedroom. Horrified, he slipped back into bed, next to his unassuming wife, who had slept right through the whole ordeal. Unable to contain the growls of his stomach, he gingerly reached out and stuffed two digestive biscuits into his mouth, before finally closing his eyes.

***

The next day, the Oberoi Industries biannual success party was brilliant. Feut de Glace had done an illustrious job, as usual, and as he walked through the swarm of guests, Tej heard them all murmur of how gorgeous everything looked. Thus, as aforementioned, the Oberoi Industries biannual success party was brilliant, except the fact that most of the family were either disgruntled, furious or just plain, exhausted. Bar Pinky, Shakti and Jhanvi everyone had had a terrible night and unbeknownst to Tej, every single one of his children had come out the worst. In varying degrees of sleeplessness, the Oberoi youngsters navigated through the night, absolutely and explicitly frustrated with themselves, and their respective others.

The most obvious of the lot, Rudra and Saumya, were evidently having a quiet fight, throughout the night. While a wide-eyed Rudra followed his usually delightful wife around, desperately trying to make conversation, she outright ignored him. And, dear god, didn't she have a reason to? Her idiotic husband, sleepwalking, had dragged both of them out of bed, in the middle of the night, to go visit the back lawns. Annoyed, Saumya had tried to coax her husband back into their room, but like he proved time and time again, those muscles weren't just for show. So, she had been forced to listen as Rudra earnestly tried to convince her that there was a dead body buried in their backyard. His assurances of the angels of death speaking to him had made her scream in frustration, but apparently, Rudra had just gotten started. Managing to retrieve shovels from god knows where, he had thrust one into her hands, and held one himself, as he demanded that they start digging. Exhausted beyond words, she had complied, hoping that he would snap out of it soon enough. It took him twenty minutes, but eventually, he did. They had made to quietly retreat to bed, but then, they found that the back lawn door had been closed effectively locking them out. It was only when Khanna walked past early next morning, did they get let back in. So, at the current point of time, Saumya was livid at her husband and for all rights and purposes, had every right to be.

If one were to look very carefully while they were making speeches, they would be able to tell that Shivaay and Annika were both sporting bruises, that they had hastily covered up with concealer and painkillers. After waking up in the middle of the night, to find her missing from their bed, Shivaay had caught his wife in the storeroom, organising, because she couldn't sleep. After attempting, fruitlessly, to convince her to go back to sleep, he had adamantly spent the whole night with her, in the cramped storeroom, cleaning and reboxing the heap of everything abandoned in the house. Things had only gone from shitty to shittier, when she had decided to reclean the upper shelves of the room as well, forcing him to hold onto a precarious ladder that had nearly collapsed while she had been working. He had caught her, but then they had both fallen brutally onto the cemented floor pulling muscles all over their body. So no, like Rudra and Saumya, these two were not exactly the most pleased either.

Next to them, both Omkara and Gauri were sniffling wildly, as they greeted guests with beaming, but empty smiles. They had barely gotten any sleep, because Gauri, being Gauri, had decided to stargaze on the poolside. Even though it was slightly weird, it would have been acceptable, but Gauri, being Gauri, also managed to slip and clumsily fall headfirst into the pool. On top of that, she didn't have the slightest idea on how to swim, so Om had had to jump into the pool, which was freezing from the wintery, midnight air. Both of them had scrambled out of the pool, but were both shivering, and desperate to take hot showers. Gauri hadn't wanted to trail water around the house, so, with a touch of usually masked naughtiness, Omkara had pulled her into the shower with himself. They had then proceeded to spend the rest of the night in the shower, lovemaking. Which then, had been a rewarding experience, but in retrospect, had been a terrible idea.

Ranveer and Priyanka, who gracefully watched the event unfold, from their seats at their allocated table, refused to talk to each other. Arguably, they had had the worst night, and each one blamed it on the other. Spoiled as she was, Priyanka had craved hot chocolate in the middle of the night. Usually, Ranveer would have told her to shove her craving back down her throat, but the intelligent Oberoi woman had very tactfully reminisced about the times that Dev, her ex-fiance, had lovingly fed her. Oh, and he had totally made her hot chocolate, when she asked, even if it was at 12am in the morning. Jealous, he had flipped, and then vowed to make her the best goddamn hot chocolate that she had ever tasted in her life. There was only a minor flaw in the whole feat, and that was only the fact that Ranveer had no idea how to cook.

Still, he had managed to turn the burner on, and so, in delight, Priyanka sat languidly on the counter, eating whipped cream out of the can, while awaiting her drink. And that was where it had all started to go downhill. In a series of unfortunate events that involved hot oil on a fire, and a failed YouTube tutorial, they had nearly burnt the kitchen down. The only way they had stopped the blaze was by throwing Ranveer's shirt at it, and that had started a big fight. It had been his favourite, silk V-neck after all, and as he so poignantly put it, his wife had just torn it right off, and burnt it. They had spent the rest of the night, cleaning up their mess while cursing each other, under their breath.

All in all, last night had been crap for everyone.

***

When dessert was finally served that night, everyone observed with bated breaths as Annika proudly placed the immaculate set of exotic cupcakes on the living room table. In an instant, the guests and the family hovered around them, murmuring excitably, as they did. Everyone from Shakti, who discreetly snuck a raspberry cupcake under a napkin (so as to avoid his hawk-eyed wife), to Gauri, who all but charged towards the vanilla-rum buttercreams, got a piece of the delicacies, that had unknowingly caused some of them so much trouble.

But Tej?

He refused to touch them.

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In retrospect, this isn't even crack - its just lame, terrible humour. Hope it managed to make at least one of you smile though!

With love,

Innika