Malini and her character development - Page 5

You write so well, do post your thoughts more often if you feel like! Your objectivity is refreshing. :)

Btw I had a similar experience as you with a friend defending Malini similarly after Saturday episode... Mera toh dimag ka dahi hogaya after debating with her on this topic lol!

Anyway, I think the main reason ppl victimise her is because they extrapolate their own experiences onto Malini...and vicariously live through her for taking ‘action’ on her problems no matter how wrong her methods are.

I’m sorry I can’t sympathise with someone just because she is a modern well educated woman.🤷‍♀️ Everyone has a degree now, someone having strength of character is much rarer occurrence.

Originally posted by: Krantikari

You write so well, do post your thoughts more often if you feel like! Your objectivity is refreshing. :)

Btw I had a similar experience as you with a friend defending Malini similarly after Saturday episode... Mera toh dimag ka dahi hogaya after debating with her on this topic lol!

Anyway, I think the main reason ppl victimise her is because they extrapolate their own experiences onto Malini...and vicariously live through her for taking ‘action’ on her problems no matter how wrong her methods are.

I’m sorry I can’t sympathise with someone just because she is a modern well educated woman.🤷‍♀️ Everyone has a degree now, someone having strength of character is much rarer occurrence.

@bold: Word.

And +1 on people victimizing Malini cuz they extrapolate their own life experiences onto her....if taking "action" is automatically something to be hailed in every scenario, even a murderer takes "action" as he/she commits a murder....should we all hail that by default without understanding the context?😕😆

Yeh ajeeb form of prejudice dekh rahi hoon main where people are like you BETTER sympathize with the educated/working woman cuz she is "independent" by default and the village girl is just trying to act bechaari😕😆.....amazing that people now feel entitled to discriminate against village characters😆.

Originally posted by: AreYaar

@bold: Word.

And +1 on people victimizing Malini cuz they extrapolate their own life experiences onto her....if taking "action" is automatically something to be hailed in every scenario, even a murderer takes "action" as he/she commits a murder....should we all hail that by default without understanding the context?😕😆

Yeh ajeeb form of prejudice dekh rahi hoon main where people are like you BETTER sympathize with the educated/working woman cuz she is "independent" by default and the village girl is just trying to act bechaari😕😆.....amazing that people now feel entitled to discriminate against village characters😆.

I guess everyone holds a Mrs AC inside them she has been reflecting this since start ke gaoon ki her ladki is pati snatcher and a looteri

Originally posted by: AreYaar

@bold: Word.

And +1 on people victimizing Malini cuz they extrapolate their own life experiences onto her....if taking "action" is automatically something to be hailed in every scenario, even a murderer takes "action" as he/she commits a murder....should we all hail that by default without understanding the context?😕😆

Yeh ajeeb form of prejudice dekh rahi hoon main where people are like you BETTER sympathize with the educated/working woman cuz she is "independent" by default and the village girl is just trying to act bechaari😕😆.....amazing that people now feel entitled to discriminate against village characters😆.

@bold 1: This reflects directly ppl's unconscious bias about women always being the victim in every scenario...and having no agency to do anything about their circumstance. It's true that a lot of women have no agency and can't take action on their problems and we should empathise with those women. But that's not Malini's circumstance, is it? She has agency and she's using it in the wrong way.

@bold 2: This is again logo ke presumptions speaking.😆 A working woman who is educated is by default categorised as independent and village girl is bechaari and thus not independent. I'm sorry but this is a brand of elitism/class consciousness too, which I guess is not limited only to Malini.

Originally posted by: Krantikari

@bold 1: This reflects directly ppl's unconscious bias about women always being the victim in every scenario...and having no agency to do anything about their circumstance. It's true that a lot of women have no agency and can't take action on their problems and we should empathise with those women. But that's not Malini's circumstance, is it? She has agency and she's using it in the wrong way.

@bold 2: This is again logo ke presumptions speaking.😆 A working woman who is educated is by default categorised as independent and village girl is bechaari and thus not independent. I'm sorry but this is a brand of elitism/class consciousness too, which I guess is not limited only to Malini.

Exactly....the defenses of Malini actually display the very behavior she herself is exhibiting of class conscious elitism....when people justify her, they are justifying their own right to look down upon a girl simply cuz she doesn't look to be of the same class as them, so they feel Malini is also right to consider her inferior 😕.

So much WORD on the point about the perception regarding agency. Staggering that most women also want to consider themselves incapable of agency by default.....frankly I don't think most people even get the concept of agency....but I guess that's a larger debate. A grown, educated woman like Malini is claiming she has no option but to cling to this marriage and people are actually hailing a woman saying she has "no option"😕😆.

Even the so called gaaon ki girl Imlie who has faced FAR worse circumstances has never uttered the words, "koi option nahin hai".....even when she was adrift, had no idea where her future will take her, what her fate will be when having to face being abandoned after marriage, she STILL never said, "koi option nahin hai".

Malini right from 1st episode came across as class conscious. In the very first episode as soon as she comes in the college she gives her handbag and books to the peon who is much older to her. Aisi kya laziness hai that she couldn't carry her own stuff. When Mrs C rebuked Adi in that first episode, she just made a face at her mother, she came across as someone who very clearly recognizes the class difference and knows where her mother is coming from. When she first came to T house, her body language screamed of someone who feels she is doing some ehsaan to Ts by coming to their house and not a new babu who wants to be part of the family. She is one who was never shown serving the family food at the dinner table. Nidhi and rupi does it often but never Malini.. That is why her behavior towards Imlie after the Pooja didn't come as a surprise to me. What always baffled me, is her extra pyaar towards Imlie, be it asking her to do her Mehendi or make up or giving her blood... May be she doesn't want to leave any opportunity to project herself as being mahaan. Whatever may be the case, but today she crossed all her limits. People can pretend to be someone they are not only for sometime, their true self comes out eventually. Today is the beginning. I hope everyone starts seeing her for what she is?

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Exactly....the defenses of Malini actually display the very behavior she herself is exhibiting of class conscious elitism....when people justify her, they are justifying their own right to look down upon a girl simply cuz she doesn't look to be of the same class as them, so they feel Malini is also right to consider her inferior 😕.

So much WORD on the point about the perception regarding agency. Staggering that most women also want to consider themselves incapable of agency by default.....frankly I don't think most people even get the concept of agency....but I guess that's a larger debate. A grown, educated woman like Malini is claiming she has no option but to cling to this marriage and people are actually hailing a woman saying she has "no option"😕😆.

Even the so called gaaon ki girl Imlie who has faced FAR worse circumstances has never uttered the words, "koi option nahin hai".....even when she was adrift, had no idea where her future will take her, what her fate will be when having to face being abandoned after marriage, she STILL never said, "koi option nahin hai".

Word to everything you said.

Re class consciousness: This is the human us-v/s-them behaviour at play, ppl innately know which group they belong to and 'otherise' everyone else...making excuses and justifications for people who they think belong to the same tribe as them.

Re agency: I agree that most people don't get the concept of agency! It always never made sense to me how people think that constantly hailing and victimising women is somehow 'empowering' them. I always thought it's the opposite. And yes, so called 'independent' woman Malini's level of clinginess to a failed relationship is never called out...I guess women can only be independent financially.😆

Re koi option nahi hai: This I find really pitiful...being this emotionally dependent on someone. I guess it goes to show what independence really is. And I don't think most people are capable of that level of independence, that maybe partly the reason why they sympathise with Malini. But it's ok...not everyone has the strength of character to be truly independent...and I don't expect Malini to be like Imlie.😊

Originally posted by: Josupra

Malini right from 1st episode came across as class conscious. In the very first episode as soon as she comes in the college she gives her handbag and books to the peon who is much older to her. Aisi kya laziness hai that she couldn't carry her own stuff. When Mrs C rebuked Adi in that first episode, she just made a face at her mother, she came across as someone who very clearly recognizes the class difference and knows where her mother is coming from. When she first came to T house, her body language screamed of someone who feels she is doing some ehsaan to Ts by coming to their house and not a new babu who wants to be part of the family. She is one who was never shown serving the family food at the dinner table. Nidhi and rupi does it often but never Malini.. That is why her behavior towards Imlie after the Pooja didn't come as a surprise to me. What always baffled me, is her extra pyaar towards Imlie, be it asking her to do her Mehendi or make up or giving her blood... May be she doesn't want to leave any opportunity to project herself as being mahaan. Whatever may be the case, but today she crossed all her limits. People can pretend to be someone they are not only for sometime, their true self comes out eventually. Today is the beginning. I hope everyone starts seeing her for what she is?

@bold: Exactly. And I hope even Adi starts to see clearly that this is who Malini was all along. I know it's probably hard for him to accept that he never really realized who she was as he kept presuming she is this super nice, mahaan soul who is jheloing a kadva karela like him.....lol....but he has to accept the truth at some point. He never really knew Malini despite grand claims of how much she understands him.

Originally posted by: Krantikari

Word to everything you said.

Re class consciousness: This is the human us-v/s-them behaviour at play, ppl innately know which group they belong to and 'otherise' everyone else...making excuses and justifications for people who they think belong to the same tribe as them.

Re agency: I agree that most people don't get the concept of agency! It always never made sense to me how people think that constantly hailing and victimising women is somehow 'empowering' them. I always thought it's the opposite. And yes, so called 'independent' woman Malini's level of clinginess to a failed relationship is never called out...I guess women can only be independent financially.😆

Re koi option nahi hai: This I find really pitiful...being this emotionally dependent on someone. I guess it goes to show what independence really is. And I don't think most people are capable of that level of independence, that maybe partly the reason why they sympathise with Malini. But it's ok...not everyone has the strength of character to be truly independent...and I don't expect Malini to be like Imlie.😊

Word to all your points here again as well.....this is the ugly side of tribalism.

@bold: I absolutely do not expect Malini to be like Imlie either....heck, being Imlie is not the measure of someone's worth. Everyone is their own person....Imlie is loved and admired for who she is but no one is asking that everyone be like her.

The reason the comparison with Imlie even arises is cuz people twist the whole issue into claiming that admiring Imlie's strength of character means we are expecting too much from Malini. That has never been the point.....we have only expected Malini to be GENUINE. She can have all the flaws in the world....everyone has some insecurity or the other....heck, even Imlie faces many moments of doubt....no one is perfect. But when you cross the line into fakeness, harassment, then all the excuses start to run out. If you expect people to respect you, give you benefit of doubt in your moments of doubt/weakness, then some basic parameters of humanity and decency should be maintained....one doesn't need to be independent to understand what humanity is.

That is the only reason the village/city comparison even comes up....people make the broad presumption that people from the village must be backwards and bechaare....yet many times, people from the village display more independence and empowerment in thought and character than many so called educated city people. That is the irony. Independence is not just about financial independence.....the ultimate independence comes from thought. In some ways, this story is also showing how facing true hardship can also empower you towards independence. Imlie has developed independence of thought even in the face of so many forces trying to suppress her.....while Malini has had all the privilege/freedoms in the world but is caged by a dependent/weak mind.

Originally posted by: AreYaar

@bold: Exactly. And I hope even Adi starts to see clearly that this is who Malini was all along. I know it's probably hard for him to accept that he never really realized who she was as he kept presuming she is this super nice, mahaan soul who is jheloing a kadva karela like him.....lol....but he has to accept the truth at some point. He never really knew Malini despite grand claims of how much she understands him.

I think Adi has a subconscious feeling about her true colors, that came out in his taunts after the car scene and the C house couple of times after Imlie was humiliated. But Malini was always able to cover it up very quickly by projecting herself as victim. As you or someone in this forum once said, Adi is 0 or 100 type person. When he could accept that it he never loved Malini in these 7 years without much difficulty he can accept he didn’t knew Malini as well as he did easily as well🤞

Truth is getting revealed to a lot of people, so Adi should know about Malini at the earliest too. I would prefer he leave her on his own due to incompatibility than his love for Imlie and he doesn’t need Imlie’s permission to do that.