Reality starts trickling in - Page 19

Originally posted by: nim_var

Bold - yes

I happened to see #76, when Adi bursts at Anu for insulting Imlie and the convo that Adini have. The words that Malini uttered make more sense now. She says 'aap Imlie ke baare mein sochne lage, tho mujhe bhool gaye' That is exactly what has happened now to Adi. He cannot even spare a thought for Malini in these 4 days at PD, let alone say her name. Earlier it used by him, throwing Malini's name at Imlie whenever he felt his emotions being affected by Imlie, it was a tactic used to distract himself and the others.

Adi is giving preference to Imlie's wishes, by returning, by accepting that she will make her own choice on whether to return, to meet him.

This is more a broader message for women empowerment. I came across a speech, that was part motivational, part spiritual where they say that when a woman is given the freedom, to make a choice, SHE always chooses the option that is right, that is dharmic in nature vs having the freedom taken away from her that results in impure thoughts and actions.

There was this story as an example too - A yaksha or divine being's form is seen as that of old hag when she is really a beautiful young person. A man falls in love with her and she tells him that she can be a beauty at day, at night she will turn into a hag or vice versa. She asks her lover to decide which forms she should retain, to which her lover replies, I will accept and live with whatever form you decide. To which the yaksha says, I have decided to retain my youthful form at all times.

Adi has now given complete control of her life back to Imlie and says he will support her, no matter what. Now if Imlie does return, that is her own choice and she will be at peace with that, it was not forced, she will not be back out of guilt.

I was reading in this thread that Imlie has to be guilt free in order to accept Adi. Yes, in the same #75/76, she says she cannot live with the guilt of breaking of Adini's rishta. She has to realize and accept that she is not to blame, their marriage had issues from the start, the cracks began spreading faster and now Adi/T's will see/understand that Malini is insecure, not emotionally strong to handle situations and is living in a bubble that Anu has placed her in.

I am nodding my head at each & every sentence of yours. Instead of token feminist speeches by FL, this kind of setup where the choice is always with the women to decide is far more effective to show women empowerment.

I am just fed up of FLs doing bhaashanbaazi all the time for rights but ultimately everything is about their husband & in laws. They do not show the FL sticking to her guns when the actual time comes. Then they are majboor & have to follow what others decide for them. Their choice is ultimately limited.

Imlie is a rare FL in that though she is also surrounded by debilitating circumstances, she makes her choices on her own come high hell or water. Outwardly she is in such a messy situation- a young naive girl forced into marriage, her dreams of studying further crushed, her husband not accepting her as wife, serving as a maid in his home, seeing him live a married life with someone else,etc. But except for the forced marriage where she had not been given any choice, afterwards there has always been choice.

The choice may have been between a bad or worse situation but ultimately she had the choice. Her refusal to give up her choice of considering her marriage to Adi as valid was so strong that Adi had to compromise & accept her choice to follow her belief & when he impulsively negated this belief of hers, she made the choice to leave him.

After so much pleading, groveling & acceptance of their rishta by him she is still strong enough to say no to returning back with him because she cannot go back & live the way she had lived once. Adi could have forced her to come if he wanted to but he admires her so much for her strength & independence that now her choice is the ultimate decider in their relationship. He had to leave without her because he knew that he has to resolve his own circumstances first & then only he can ask her to come back.

Such a beautiful equation has been established between them in this PD trip. Hoping for the best moving forward. The makers have raised my expectations quite a bit & that makes me apprehensive because there is no guarantee in the ITV land.

Originally posted by: nim_var

Bold - yes

I happened to see #76, when Adi bursts at Anu for insulting Imlie and the convo that Adini have. The words that Malini uttered make more sense now. She says 'aap Imlie ke baare mein sochne lage, tho mujhe bhool gaye' That is exactly what has happened now to Adi. He cannot even spare a thought for Malini in these 4 days at PD, let alone say her name. Earlier it used by him, throwing Malini's name at Imlie whenever he felt his emotions being affected by Imlie, it was a tactic used to distract himself and the others.

Adi is giving preference to Imlie's wishes, by returning, by accepting that she will make her own choice on whether to return, to meet him.

This is more a broader message for women empowerment. I came across a speech, that was part motivational, part spiritual where they say that when a woman is given the freedom, to make a choice, SHE always chooses the option that is right, that is dharmic in nature vs having the freedom taken away from her that results in impure thoughts and actions.

There was this story as an example too - A yaksha or divine being's form is seen as that of old hag when she is really a beautiful young person. A man falls in love with her and she tells him that she can be a beauty at day, at night she will turn into a hag or vice versa. She asks her lover to decide which forms she should retain, to which her lover replies, I will accept and live with whatever form you decide. To which the yaksha says, I have decided to retain my youthful form at all times.

Adi has now given complete control of her life back to Imlie and says he will support her, no matter what. Now if Imlie does return, that is her own choice and she will be at peace with that, it was not forced, she will not be back out of guilt.

I was reading in this thread that Imlie has to be guilt free in order to accept Adi. Yes, in the same #75/76, she says she cannot live with the guilt of breaking of Adini's rishta. She has to realize and accept that she is not to blame, their marriage had issues from the start, the cracks began spreading faster and now Adi/T's will see/understand that Malini is insecure, not emotionally strong to handle situations and is living in a bubble that Anu has placed her in.

@Malini - absolutely. I do not think Aditya ever remembered her in any sense. Their relationship felt superficial from day one. She thought he thought about her. But that was never the place she occupied. Something that Malini will realize too after a lot of tamasha.

Word on the empowerment bit. And the fact that he tells her it’s her choice and not his is also indicative of the trust between them. He knows she will get it right even if he does not. A deep implicit belief.

I am excited to see the conversation between Adi & his boss. How is he going to react because the editor will be the first person to whom his truth has been revealed. I hope he becomes a confidant to him & gives him perspective so that he can control his impulsive nature a bit. Adi desperately needs someone else as a sounding board because sometimes he worsens the situation in his impulsiveness & he would require someone else to tell him how such things will affect Imlie as well.

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Circling back to this just now.....lol I can understand Fary's nostalgia for Nakku and her Saab too.....but Adi-Imlie's case is different for a few reasons that I think Fary also pointed out.

a) She doesn't call him Babusahib cuz of their difference in status in so much as the difference in their background.....a person from the city is always "babu" by default to a person from the village....and the sahib is added in as a respect I think both for him being older than her and also for the respect she feels for him as a person. Phew! I thought I was the only one not seeing it as a status symbol.. this has endearment to me in the way he has become so habituated if her babusahibs too it is just a name no one else calls her with but her.. it reflects so much of respect and apnaiyat from before the trauma shook them.. and for me it was always about where they come from just the sheer BG difference yes she is educated but still she is shown as a gaoon ki chori who had aspirations to go to shehar so she had a higher regard for hi coming from there and then blowing her mind with his bebak reporting and work.. it reflects everytime she calls him babusahib even in between their disagreements too that respect never leaves it is in her eyes in the way she calls him that.. it never was about her feeling lesser or naukrani ke babusahib kehna hai caz of that..

So here I would push back a bit on the premise that they are "equal partners" for each other.....the age and background difference will always play some part and they will never have that peer quality between them as a couple I feel......there will always a bit of a nod to the fact that he is older while she's still in college....it plays into things like the fact that he is still a teacher for her in many ways even as she is his wife otherwise. They are building towards an equality of mind between them but there is still that old school kind of respect between them as well where she gives him the regard of holding him in higher esteem while simultaneously having the courage to push back sternly too if she feels he's not right. Yup and I would like them to treat it like that too.. maintain that vibe that guardian wala bonding ..they can totally say and behave as per their wishes yet he is there more as that guy looking over her too showing her the path.. that old school respect really is so unique one can see the ease between them yet the respect the maturity.. againa very fine line to maintain and so far they have aced it .. to me even when they are pally sometime later I would like them to have this going ke when he needs to be the teacher the adult and use that age factor he can.. I prefer the emotional and mental wavelength pe equality without making a show of hum equal hain hum empowered hain in token ways..

b) A major reason this is different from Nakku's "saab".....Nakku never had any other name for her Saab😆.....Imlie has alternated between Babusahib and Sheheri Langoor when she felt the need to😆.....she is capable of giving him other nicknames....so in that sense, Babusahib is also a kind of nickname for him from her side along with being that respectful title.....ek baar Kauvva bhi bula diya tha isne Adi ko.....lol......and Adi himself raised this in his little confession speech where he was like, "Hum isko Jhalli bulaate hain, yeh humein Sheheri Langoor bulaati hai".....so in that sense, the Babusahib is not as much of a mental barrier in Imlie's mind as Saab was for Nakku to overcome....lol

With nakku as you said she had no other word either😆plus she was a bhakt in many ways her devotion was kuch aur hi level ka divine.. and her saab had that devotee vibe in many ways too mood and emotion very different apnapan same

Here imlie can tease can give him 100 other names to annoy him to tease him to get back at him but comes back to babusahib out of sheer respect and caz woh apna feel hota hai on normal everyday basis more appropriate.

I don't yet know if I want to hear her call him Aditya or Adi....lol for now, Babusahib gives a different flavor to their equation and kuch apna sa hai usmein.....her calling Nishant Chhote Babusahib doesn't factor in much yet cuz she doesn't talk to him that often😆....I feel like N he will ask her to give him a different name aage since he also calls her "Cool dude", so Babusahib will go back to being just for Adi for a while.

Damn it I can't bold for some stupid ad covering the codes ughh but yeah I totally agree to it as I have been repeating over and over.. adi and Aditya feels very external sa begaana sa to me from her mouth.. as if kisi baharwale ko bol rahi hai.. jo baat and attachment comes from her babusahib that will take a while to transition into anything else.. heck even shehri langoor feels more apna then adi and Aditya..haha nishant bechara kaun.. waise bhi big difference between chite babusahib and adi and am sure she will settle for bhaiya for nishant soon-ish just like dhruv and that brings us back to why babusahib isn't about being a maid caz she calls nish chote babushib also caz he came from foreign and most people fancy that ke saab aaya hai while dhruv is just plain simple bhaiya... hence it not being about her status the her bg..

Aditya/Adi would sound better at a different stage in their relationship I feel....they aren't there at this point....I also feel the writers will keep that as a line between them until whenever Adi can bring her into his life as his wife......this Babusahib title helps keep a demarcation between them on the city side to keep up the facade in front of the family too that she only considers Adi a kind of older guardian figure.....makes it even easier for everyone to dismiss the possibility they could be anything more😆.

Originally posted by: AreYaar

LOL maybe Aditya will sound better in Imlie's voice cuz Malini ki tone mein toh Aditya sounds kinda annoying😆.....all depends on how it's adjusted in their relationship when the time comes....and I feel that time is a very long away right now😆

This mentor wala gap between them will remain for a while....especially until she's still completing her college studies and he's still in more of that fussy and strict teacher mode with her😆.

DC ab waapis aa gaya hai Dilli and Mithi is more focused on SK again.....lol so I think we can relax and focus on Babusahib being only for Adi for a while again😆

Rofl 🤣😂🤣 which is why GM can't help but keeps making fun of her Particular way of calling him Aditya Aditya all the time too🤣

DC being called babusahib once in blue moon I can zone out caz essentially it is a term I refer to with adi.. and uska meaning and woh speciality factor tab hi feel hota hai not when mithi says it .it Doesn't get a reaction out of me caz I have no emotional involvement with that.. haan but agar koi aur adi ko babusahib bole kabhi toh shayad I will react strongly caz for me that is only imlie ka haq

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Catching up on the thread just now and enjoyed reading all the analysis :). Apologies for not being able to respond as much to the posts today. It’s been a hectic weekend. Hope to be able to respond tomorrow.

One random thing that I forgot to mention earlier and I don’t know if someone has already mentioned it here. I was struck by this in the epi also that Adi entered his house and didn’t sense Malini’s absence. Such a contrast from that time when he instantly felt something (Imlie) missing when he came home and Imlie had gone to C house. Even when he didn’t know what was missing, he felt something was missing. This time, Malini has left the house and he can’t sense her absence....or I guess even her presence. He never really could to begin with. It’s only becoming more obvious now.

And it is such a sad reflection of their relationship/ lives. Malini was so much in the background of his existence that she never registered. So her absence did not register either. It is so unfortunate that they wasted 7 years of each others’ lives pretending that they meant something they never did in the first place.

Even average couples without big love in their lives miss their partners even if it is only habitual only in nature (like missing food cooked by the other etc). Even that did not seem to be a part of the Aditya Malini equation . There was some discussion on this thread about whether these two were even friends to begin with - i think Imlie’s entry into his life probably wiped out of relevance any little bit of friendship that they were linked with. In the first episode I think where they are drinking tea, he does protect her from water splashing at her. So he did care a bit but maybe never to the extent the relationship needed.

Originally posted by: MuteButton

And it is such a sad reflection of their relationship/ lives. Malini was so much in the background of his existence that she never registered. So her absence did not register either. It is so unfortunate that they wasted 7 years of each others’ lives pretending that they meant something they never did in the first place.

Even average couples without big love in their lives miss their partners even if it is only habitual only in nature (like missing food cooked by the other etc). Even that did not seem to be a part of the Aditya Malini equation . There was some discussion on this thread about whether these two were even friends to begin with - i think Imlie’s entry into his life probably wiped out of relevance any little bit of friendship that they were linked with. In the first episode I think where they are drinking tea, he does protect her from water splashing at her. So he did care a bit but maybe never to the extent the relationship needed.

Food cooking se yaad aaya the malini who was all about cooking yeh and yeh and yeh never actually did that post marriage ever either and yes we're shown she cooks a lot and his fav dishes a lot but again he is never actually shown to us eating that casually either.. 🤣 have they shown that? I have no memories of that.. all I know Is she kept cooking nonstop 😆 even the cake once mentioned her never got to eat it 😆

I'll just add general thoughts on some things cuz I don't have the energy to go back and quote/reply to specific posts right now😆

About the lack of a hug.....lol I don't think the issue is about whether the goodbye scene needed a hug or not....I know most people around here only want the hug for "chemistry" reasons😆.....but that wasn't the reason for me....when the discussion about the hug was happening before the epi aired, no one quite knew how the goodbye scene would play out....my thought was that if a hug had to happen, it would happen in a moment of impulse, otherwise it won't.

The goodbye scene ultimately ended up happening seperately from the conversation in the jungle where Adi was at his most emotional/impulsive. If the goodbye had happened in that moment and Adi hadn't tried to insert a love confession between it😆, then a hug would have been the way to express all that he can't bring himself to say yet. But the makers chose a different path in showing him almost saying out the words instead and Imlie stopping him there.

Which is why the actual goodbye scene ended up being all about pulling back....Adi's struggle with pulling back from Imlie after having gotten carried away the last time he was pouring out his emotions in front of her. So a hug wouldn't fit in this scenario at all and it became all about Adi trying to show he will always be there for her in any way she allows him to be.....giving her motivation and hope if she won't allow him to give her anything else right now. By the time, the scene happened, I wasn't expecting any hug at all😆.....and I know everyone else found the goodbye scene very emotional but I was still feeling amused by Adi in this for some reason😆.....his attempts to be like "Ok theek hai mat milna"......he's so full of it😆. Ghanta "it's ok".....lol....as if we don't know him enough by now to know kab badi badi baatein karta hai that we know he won't be able to have impulse control over one bit😆.....his attempt at showing "large hearted maturity" in that scene was what was making me laugh.....Imlie ne maanga toh he's trying to leave....telling her he will give her space if that's what she wants😆.....but nahin hona isse. The guy who got SO carried away that he was about to TELL her he loves her before even consciously realizing it himself😆.....THAT guy is going to be like, "ok mat milna"....hahaha yeah right😆.

The Adi who grapples between zidd and emotional blackmail to get what he wants.....lol that's the more familiar Adi now than the one who tries to show he can be "large hearted".....lol

So in that sense, I was still more touched by the bus scene....because that's where I saw a glimpse of that zidd karne wala Adi....jo Imlie se shikaayat karta hai😆.....jise pata hai ki he's not going to be ok away from her....and he has this mix of rueful emotions about it.

The goodbye scene showed the Adi who wants to be a mentor/motivator to Imlie if she won't let him be anything else.....while the bus imagination scene showed the Adi who within minutes of leaving her was back to his, "Mujhe kyun nahin roka" line😆.....lol this is the guy who thinks he can live up to "it's ok if you don't want to meet me"? Sure Sure😆

Both the scenes were lovely....the goodbye scene was more heartbreaking over how much Adi was trying to hold himself back to give her some support in other ways if she won't allow it the way he otherwise wants to.....and the bus scene - I think I just loved it for the Imlie smiling at him so serenely as he kept trying to get answers from her😆

Re: Adi sleeping peacefully in the hut while Imlie made rotis.....lol the idea of him finding peace in her presence was a lovely one no doubt but I just couldn't stop laughing thinking he spent a whole extra evening/night in her house😆.....like what did they talk about after coming back from the jungle? So easy to jump to the next morning in timeline? 😆.....they should have added in some scene about Adi missing his bus that afternoon so having to wait until the next day for the next bus😆.....

All in all, the fact that the writers kept Adi's thought process regarding what to do about Malini so vague made Imlie's decision all the more apt.....this guy still doesn't know what the hell he's doing😆.....so thank god for this girl who's still trying to save him from himself. You can't go around doing love confessions to someone when you still aren't clear about who your wife is, do you have one wife/two wives etc. etc. 😆......Yeah, he's having his epiphanies about what he wants in life now and he's a good person otherwise but the way he was going about this was going to set up way more long term regrets.

Re: all the discussion about Imlie needing to realize why Malini-Adi are wrong for each other and won't be happy together.....lol.....I'm wondering if the writers want to keep both Imlie and Adi so above the fray regarding this delicate topic that they would rather some external force draw this conclusion that Malini-Adi are incompatible😆......Do they not even want to show Adi reaching the obvious conclusion cuz they still don't know if they want to show Adi saying he fell out of love with Malini or that he never loved her to begin with? 😆.....The latter would make for a more interesting journey of self-reflection for Adi but so far, I can't really say which direction they will take it in......they are studiously avoiding showing Adi's thought process on Malini.

Maybe tonight's epi will bring some relative clarity on that. Hope they show some of Adi's thoughts beyond his apologies and evasiveness with Malini.....

Originally posted by: naadanmasakalli

Food cooking se yaad aaya the malini who was all about cooking yeh and yeh and yeh never actually did that post marriage ever either and yes we're shown she cooks a lot and his fav dishes a lot but again he is never actually shown to us eating that casually either.. 🤣 have they shown that? I have no memories of that.. all I know Is she kept cooking nonstop 😆 even the cake once mentioned her never got to eat it 😆

🤣🤣 Exactly. Bas carrot chop karti reh gayi

Originally posted by: MuteButton

Aditya actually set himself free only to be bound by Imlie’s boundaries I thought. He has always been one to want to tell the truth atleast in that sense. The fact that he fails to do so at every instance is a different issue. Aditya already knows who he wants to be with. And he is pretty much determined to do what his conscience told him to. He did the acceptance part of it in PD. Telling Malini the truth that he is now Imlie’s is the second bit. But he will not be able to do so because didi behosh ho gayi bhook hadthaal karte karte. He will suffocate living with her but it is not a tie he wants to restrain himself with anymore. The finality of that will happen once Imlie is back in his orbit anyway.

The bigger onus is also on Imlie realizing that Malini’s happiness is not with Aditya. And that Aditya actually means it when he says his relationship with Imlie is the only one that matters. So a lot of it is going to be Imlie’s journey of self-reflection whereas Aditya’s will be one of atonement.

On their partnership - the fact that he mentions honesty, belief/trust and courage as the qualities that binds him to Imlie is so indicative of what these two are to each other. Partners in the truest of sense. He will always motivate her - do teen episode se zyada toh door rakhenge nahin inn dono ko. Which means he will do it in person every time.

Exactly, I think that is Aditya thought process but Imlie is not aware of it. He is not made that stance clear yet for her or she is still not sure of it. Hence, her question to him ki "rishta hain?", because though he has done and said a lot of things but not what is her place compared to Malini's. Also, Aditya will try to speak out the truth but Malini and family attitude is going to play a lot over here and he might not be able to take the steps that he wants to give Imlie her "pehchaan"

@Bold2 : LOL Of course that's a given but at that point, at that moment at the bus stop, they both are not aware that destiny would be bringing them back together more sooner than they both realize.