PART 5
Gandhinagar Chourasta:
With a bag in one hand and his set of travel documents in the other, Raj was anxiously waiting for Sarita to arrive. He glanced at his watch, to check the time for the umpteenth time. It was still 00:40 hours on the clock. But it seemed like time was standing still tonight. Every minute felt like an hour, every second like a minute.
He decided to sit on a bench in the nearby park, since he felt his knees would give in, with all the nervousness he was experiencing. He had a strange feeling, like a vice gripped around his neck, choking him. What was happening to him? He wondered. He must be happy with excitement and anticipation. Instead he felt uneasy and unsure of things. He felt unhappy deep within. That was not how he was supposed to feel, especially when he was about to start afresh with a person whom he loved. Atleast that was what he thought.
He pondered on how life changed from one instant to the next. One instant he was eager with excitement to start his life with his college sweetheart, the love of his life and the next instant was pushed into a loveless marriage with Sarita. He wanted to do the noble thing by getting Sarita remarried, only to discover that he loved her. One instant he was ready to get Sarita married to Vikrant and the next instant was confessing his love to her at the eleventh hour. He was happy when she reciprocated. But she married Vikrant anyway, for love and money, she said. Until he came to know that her marriage was a deal to save his sister. Hence he resolved to pursue her. But was this resolve out of love he had for her as a friend or as a life partner? Or was this out of guilt that she had been pushed to marry Vikrant indirectly because of him? Or was this resolve in someway to set her free from the bindings of a sham of a marriage, as a gratitude for saving his sister? "By eloping with her? By leaving a small child motherless? By deeply hurting a person whom you have loved half your life?" asked the inner voice laced with contempt.
He hatched the plan of eloping and Sarita went with it, did she not? Then why was he feeling so unsure now? "Stop this nonsense before things go out of control and you lose everyone, before you lose Divya!" screamed his inner self. He did not make any attempt to stop it now. But before he could even weigh or cross examine the feelings he held for Divya or could ponder upon his confused emotions, he heard hurried footsteps from across the lawn.
He looked up to see Sarita walking towards him in a brisk pace. He noticed the absence of her bag and was wondering whether she was playing him. And out flew all the heart-to-heart he was having with his inner self. He was filled with anger and rage. He stood up as she drew nearer, exhibiting a huge amount of self control.
As she approached RajJi from across the lawn, she saw him seated on the bench, hunched over. It felt like he was in acute pain. There were so many emotions playing across his face, which she could see with the help of the park lamps. Was she sensing uncertainity in him? She wondered. She only hoped that he got back to his sane self. He really needed to, for his own sake. As the saying went, better late than never. But when he stood up, she found that he was awfully calm.
She came to a halt in front of him and did not understand how to start the conversation. Just when she was about to say something, she heard him say something totally unexpected, that made her do a double take.
"I do not want to elope with you, SaritaJi!" he said.
She could not believe her ears and said "What?"
"You heard me right. I do not want to elope with you to Dubai" he said.
She felt relief rush through her system when she heard it. But then he looked angry saying that. Now this puzzled her. She somehow felt compelled to know the reason behind this sudden change in his stance. "Why?" She asked
"Because I feel that you are playing me!" came the instant reponse.
Now this threw her for a loop. That was the last thing she expected to come out of his mouth. What did she expect? For him to realise his blunders and confess to it? It was like floodgates opened and she lost her self control and lashed out at him in anger. "Oh my god! Enough is enough, RajJi! I am tired of all this and so is Divya! When are you going to put an end to this craziness of yours?"
"How dare you call me crazy", he said with anger.
"How else do you explain your actions of late ? This obsession of yours for me has made you so out of character. I cannot recognise you anymore! Can you?" she questioned him
"Obsession? Saritaji, I love you!" he said but without any conviction.
"No, you do not! I do not see this as love! How can a person be so heartless as to bring their family to streets, yet claim to love someone? How can he put the person whom he loved for 12 long years, through so much heartache knowingly? Loving means giving, without expecting anything in return. And love is not restricted to one person and it does not come with conditions attached to it!" she said.
He smirked and said, "Well, well, if this isn't the pot calling the kettle black! Who came up with a set of conditions? To cut off family ties, to pool money, to lie to them? If my memory serves right, I thought it was you! So now you are giving me advice about what love is? Well isn't this just nice!"
And she just snapped "Yes, I did ask you to do all that! But did you stop for a minute to think why I would ask you to do such things? If you really loved me, as you claim so, then you would know that I would NEVER try to seperate you from your family. I was married to you for 10 years to know the bond you share with your family! The problem is you never KNEW me, let alone love me! I know everything about you, but you know NOTHING about me! You never took the effort to know me for the 10 years that we had been married. You were ready to believe that I married Mr. Suryavanshi for money. If you really knew me, then you would know that I do not give a damn about money. I married Mr.Suryavanshi, to help Shiela, your sister. When I could go to this length for your family, why would I ask you to cut ties off with them? Did you ever stop to think about that? Throughout our married life, you were so much in love with Divya! And you just forgot your love for her in the two months that you spent knowing me? And how can you drag her into this mess knowing that she will be terribly hurt? What is wrong with you? Why are you behaving this way? Did you stop to analyse your actions of late? How your actions might hurt people who love you? You have stooped so low that I have no respect left for you!"
He was angry now. Why was she saying all this now? It was like listening to his inner self again. But he overlooked it deliberately and said, " Why are you bringing up all this now? And why do you care about Divya? You got all your conditions fulfilled by me, didn't you? Then why worry about my family and Divya? And youof all people should not be speaking about respect! I would not have done all this, had you not come up with your conditions! I lost respect for you the day you put forth those conditions"
She took a deep breath before she spoke "Yet you wanted to elope with me, Rajji? Why? Was it a blow to your ego to see that Mr.Suryavanshi was happy with me? And hence had to snatch the happiness he had and teach him a lesson? Because I cannot see any other reason why you would go through with this!" She paused before continuing "What you have for me is not love, RajJi, it is just infatuation or probably affection which you might have for a friend! What you had with Divya was love, pure and unadulterated! And you wanted to know why I care about Divya, right? Because she is the most selfless person I have ever met. She knows everything about you and yet is sticking around hoping that the love she has for you will make you come back to her! She feels that the abundance of love she has is enough for both of you, to last a lifetime! I do not want to see her hurt! That is why"
He was ambushed with truth and facts and was stunned into silence for sometime, a variety of emotions playing across his face. Finally he spoke. "Wh..at, What are you talking about?"He asked cautiously, with confusion and curiosity in his voice.
"I will tell you everything as long as you promise me to think rationally after I am done with what I have to say." She said softly
He nodded his head slowly. That is when she understood that she finally got through to him. And so she went on to tell him about everything, Divya knowing about his infatuation for her and yet not running away and trusting and helping her with the plan that she hatched and so on.
She let out a huge sigh and said, " All I wanted after my marriage with Mr. Suryavanshi, was for you to move on and lead a happy life with Divya, because I knew that both of you loved each other with so much passion. That is why I came up with the stupid plan and those conditions. To make you see how much you loved Divya. And to even make you understand how much your family loved you and vice versa. But that only drove you to extremes. I am completely to blame for your current actions. I unknowingly pushed you to do unimaginable things. For that I am deeply sorry!" She said with a lot of guilt in her voice.
"Please do not make me feel anymore ashamed than I already am, Saritaji! I am so very very ashamed that I put you, Divya and my family through so much trauma. My current actions are my own fault. Even if you came up with the conditions, it was me who went through with it. All the time I was subconciously aware that what I was doing was wrong. I am only hoping that you will forgive me for putting you through this. God knows what must have been going on in your head, when you saw me on on that roof! It must have shocked the hell out of you. Yet you tried to get me to see reason. All the while seeing to it that the other people whom you loved and cared about, did not get affected by all this! I can only say sorry and a big thank you! I know that it does not make up for all the plight I put you through. But right now an apology is where I can start to undo all the mistakes I made." he stuttered as emotions clogged his voice.
She smiled through her tears and said, "It is not me whom you have to apologise or thank. It is Divya whom you have to thank for not losing her faith in you and for staying with you despite what you did to her."
"And I can only hope against hope that she will forgive me for all this." he said, interrupting her.
"And I will pray for the same" she said
He paused a little before saying, "Can I ask you something Saritaji? "
She nodded her head. He hesitatingly asked, "Are you happy with Vikrant? "
He saw the emotions across her face transform from a questioning frown to a full blown smile! He found his answer before she actually replied. "Yes I am, RajJi! I am very happy with him and Abhi. What can I say? They complete me."
"You deserve it after what life had put you through. I did not make things easy for you, EVER. I am so very sorry for that. I assure you that I will not be the reason for your unhappiness anymore. I assure you that I will start my life afresh with full of positivity, just like you. I only hope it is not too late"
"And I wish all the happiness for you and Divya, as well, RajJi. What are you waiting for? Go get your girl!" She urged him
Vikrant was standing far away, eyeing the body language of Raj and his wife. They looked comfortable and at ease with each other. There was no tension surrounding them, considering what they were about to do, he thought. He strained to hear their conversation, but to no avail. Rage was running through his veins to see Sarita so relaxed and smiling. He saw Raj moving forward to hold Sarita's hands. She looked up at him, smiling. "How could she do this to them? There was a small boy waiting for her at home and a husband who loves her. Leave about him, but was she really so selfish, that she would break the heart of a small boy?" he wondered.
Raj stepped forward and gently took her hands in his and said "Thank you!"
She looked up and said, "You are welcome! Now go!"
Vikrant was fuming with anger. He slowly raised his revolver and aimed it at them.
To be continued...
I am personally not that happy with how this part turned out. I felt like I missed something out and somehow the emotions did not come accross as I hoped it would. Hope I do a better job next time. I know that Raj does not deserve forgiveness immediately. But Sarita is so kind hearted that a genuine sorry is enough for her to forgive a person. That is why I wrote this chapter the way I did. Sorry if this part did not match your expectations :) 😃
Edited by wupa - 11 years ago
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