Originally posted by: MariaS395
I wish you could hear my shriek of delight when I saw the size of your comment! 😆 There's nothing that can brighten up the day of a writer more than some long honest feedback! So thank you so much for taking time out to give me such a detailed review! 🤗
Intense chapter. Awww, Shlok was so worried for her and couldn't stand to see her in pain. I liked the hospital scene and how when she was in pain, he held her hand and didn't just see her pain but felt her pain, she was in pain therefore he was in pain.
That's precisely why I had to make Astha go through all of that stuff - because with introvert characters like Shlok that have mastered the skill of being indifferent, it is so hard to show how deep their emotions really are because they just never express them! I'm happy that through the hospital scene, you saw how much Astha actually affects him. :)
I like how despite all this happening, she hasn't forgotten everything that has happened and everything Shlok has done. She doesn't want to take his help anymore than necessary and he, well he can't see her in pain and just wants to look after her. I can totally see Shlok acting like this on the show if Astha ever got hurt, I think he'd fuss over her trying to do anything to make her feel better.
I liked the scene where Astha harshly told Shlok that she's fine. He's fussing over her and wanting to help her and maybe in a normal situation that would be appreciated but after everything that has happened, I don't think she wants his help right now.
Thank you for delving into Astha's mind and understanding her actions! Truly, the stuff that she has had to go through in the course of the last month and her current torture with the Agnihotri's only makes it logical for her to despise Shlok. For her, he's the man because of whom her life took a 360 turn, for the worse! I'm glad you didn't find Shlok's worry and care out of character. :)
I loved the scene at the end where Shlok realised that she didn't call out for him to help. He expects her to reach out to him when she's in danger but for once rather than call him, she decided to risk it all and risk that goon injuring her and potentially raping rather than ask for him for help. Its understandable and I can totally understand Shloks anger and how upset he must feel at those words. Despite the fact how strained there relationship may be, there's always this unspoken agreement that if she was in danger he'd help her, he knew that if she needed help he'd drop everything and go help her and she knew that if she called out to him he'd come running and save her like always yet she decided for once not to reach out to him for help and this has hurt him a lot and the reasoning behind it must have hurt a lot. He punched the window to try and block out her words and the pain they evoked in him. Its sad that he's hurting himself physically to try and stop the emotional pain but its understandable and very realistic for a character like Shlok.
👏 👏You captured the whole essence of this chapter so beautifully! In fact, you are the first to really point it out - Astha thinks that its Shlok's ego that got hurt, but that in fact is far from the truth! The real pain stems from his realization that she doesn't feel and bond, any attachment whatsoever to him! Liked you said - she broke her end of the unspoken agreement - that they would still be there and count on each other in difficult times. It's actually a wake-up call for him - slowly but surely Astha has been gradually making a place in his heart and mind but in Astha's case, its the opposite - he's fading away and losing importance! He's frustrated because all of a sudden he feels like it's all one-sided. He isn't as important in Astha's world as she is in his!
I love this fic and I can't wait to read more and as for whether the pace is slow, I like the current pace a lot. Its not too fast but not too slow either and its a nice kind of slow burner and it doesn't feel unrealistic. I hope you keep it at whatever pace feels comfortable for you because I'm just enjoying this fic a lot and I've got to say you write very beautifully, its all structured well together and everythings written so well that it appears so vivid and I love that so keep doing whatever it is your doing and please update soon :)
Thank you sooo much once again for this lovely comment! You've made me feel so special! 😳 I'm happy you are enjoying my work so far and I really look forward to reading more reviews from you! :D
Real Estate
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