SwaRon|D3|FF - Behind My Eyes//.

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705014

Hibernated

Posted: 13 years ago

#51

Sharon's frustation over dance was described really well. Its sad to see that what she loves do to is nothing but a job and Swayam..why is he distancing himself from her though he loves her ? Im waiting to know. Amazing update and thanks for the PM.

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Neel

@neeliyer

Explorer

Posted: 13 years ago

#52

Ok.. so just now I saw this FF, n after reading the intro I was like preparing myself for the reading something usually dark unknowingly what that might be like .. but after reading the Prologue, I was like 😕 .. super confused .. not actually getting the feel of what the character was feeling .. I kinda re read the prologue for like 3 to 4 times .. to finally get into the characters feel or atleast feel like i'm finally understanding .. phewww .. it was like every time I re read the prologue something or the other that I had missed earlier strikes me .. I really loved the prologue .. its an awesome piece of work ..

I can go on praising about ur writing bt common on we all know u are a super ⭐️, 1 thing is for sure .. ur writings is are getting more intense and cryptic .. I like it and hate it at the same time .. like it coz one really need to thing harder n a lot to understand it, rather than just reading a simple sweet fairy tale ( with no disrespect to that ) .. n hate it coz I go on over thinking about what it might be, without actually knowing which one of my assumption is correct or even remotely close to it..

Damn..u know whats the sad part now, I had to wait for another of ur update .. 😛

Update soon .. 😉

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Snowey

@Snowey

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#53

A very interesting start. Love the title you choose. It looks like Sharon has left lot many things for dance to actually enjoy it any further. One thing is for sure this isn't the SwaRon we are used to. Looking forward to see how there character progress through out the FF and how SwaRon converstaion is going to be in the coming updates. If its little we know about Sharon, Swayam still remains a complete mystery for now. Looking forward for the next update.

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tanuka

@Tanuka_TanHa

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#54

amazing update kanks !!👏

sharons frustration was really well described .

its sad to see sharon considering dance which was her first love to be nothing more than a job😭

i am confussed abt the type of relationship that swaron share 😕

they both love each other but still sharon needs to make a efffort to make swayam feel loved !!

whats with the routine that swayam follows ???

i am very curious to no so plz update soon...

thanks for the pm.

Edited by tanukaswaron - 13 years ago

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sukanya.

@Lovenarbhi

Sparkler

Posted: 13 years ago

#55

Kanks Saving your FF for the last. Kanks I have read many ffs on swaron and to tell you the truth I love them all. But yaar when it comes to you, it is different. Your style of writing is totally unique and so very refreshing.

I stared at his, Swayum's face as intently my drowsy orbs allowed. As though in return of a most appeasing favour, I tried to smile at him like he did at me. Neither my gaze nor my smile quite matched the magnitude of his. He looked at me like it was the only business of his very existence. He did not consider me the nasty piece of work that I am known to be or the lousy and frightened girl that I felt myself to be.

@bold : There is something awesomely beautiful in these lines. I felt like reading it again. It is so so very touching. Only swayam can understand sharon so well and so deeply and these lines have got some magnatic pull which made me come again and again to read. I know and have told you several times your writing is class apart. But this one my dear is just out of the world. Well done kanks, you are absolutely fantastic.

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Trushna

@swaronland

Navigator

Posted: 13 years ago

#56

brilliant update.
u described sharon's frustration very well.
I'm loving this.it's different
& desperate to know why this distance between them
though small convo of swaron was nice.
Continue soon & thanks 4 pm

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Asma

@-FrozenRain-

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 13 years ago

#57

Wonderful update.

Loved it.

Thanks for the pms

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RapChick101

@RapChick101

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#58

Lovely concept dear,

Would like to receive pms! :)
Surprisingly your already on my buddy list! :S
I do feel I know you on I-F of course!

-Adya

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Sawyer_Tom

@Sawyer_Tom

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#59

Stupid Kanks! You really shouldn't have revealed the concept of this story to me. Though I'm actually happy you did. 😛

I don't know how to comment on this FF without divulging it's theme so I think I'll just stick to commenting on your writing style. Is is weird that I feel as I if I'm now more familiar with your style then I was previously? Like I can understand it more better, delve into it more deeper. I thought I already understood it as much as I could, but I was wrong.

You have this knack of making your writing flow. Like it's all very natural that those words should come together to form the beautiful, seemingly effortless sentences that you weave out of your imagination. You are brilliant, is all I can say.

Ok I know I said that I wouldn't comment on the story but...whatever. Can't help myself. You know the whole part where you described the way she was dancing, as if more out of habit than the actual passion which she had initially harboured? I found myself reading it over and over again, entranced. People's perception and taste has changed her attitude towards dancing. They are making her dance the way they want to not the way she wants to and the simplicity with which you portrayed the entire complexity of the situation had me thinking at the truth in that fact. At one point in life, all of us do what others want us to do as contrary to what we want to do and it's only when that bondage is lifted from our mind can we truly find the meaning of true freedom and happiness. At least I believe that.

Sharon's mental agony was well brought out. No subtlety there, huh? 😆

Swayam's more unconditional love than the most unconditional love in this universe was so fiercely realized by Sharon that I felt extremely sad for her. Like heart tugging, almost weeping sad. There you outshone yourself KD. 👏

And then comes the part wherein she tries her best to reciprocate that exact amount of intensity that she knows he has for her. Another heart clenching moment.

And then the part where he leaves her and she doesn't bother as if deep within she is aware of what's happening but ignoring it anyway. The saddest of 'em all!

Well I know that this comment is probably longer than the chapter itself but as you can see I have no reservations against it. This is what I felt. So this is what I wrote.

Love,

En.

P.S. Loved the title.

Originally posted by: marauder
Why i have a feeling that everything isn't the same about SwaRon as it appears in the first look . Why i have a inkling that this update is misleading ? I don't know it may sound far fetched but i think Sharon is schizophrenic in this FF. Because nothing seems to be right about Swayam and Sharon relationship to me.
A very engaging and intriguing start. Loved the way you have expressed the frustration of Sharon over being instructd what to do and what not to do. Her pain , anger and frustration can be felt . Superb writing. Waiting for the next update.

And Marauder, I don't know what to say to you. 😳

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Radioactive.

@Radioactive.

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

#60

A beautiful beginning Kanks. Oh the poor thing cant be blamed, anyone would feel that life sucks if they had to do the same thing day after day, even if they love it with all their might. The little conversation between Swayam and Sharon that you put in was kinda cute. You've already got me hooked to this.!

Thanx for the PM and update real soon. :)

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SwaRon|D3|FF - Behind My Eyes//. - Page 6

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