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Part-16
Kalpana was sleeping in her room but the medications were not of high dosage as it use to be when she was in hospital. It was the effect of sleeping pills that helped Kalpana to sleep calmly but now the medicines have changed. She was finding difficult to sleep.
She had lost her memory and as a human she was anxious to know what was her life prior to accident. What she was? How she use to live her life? How did she meet Raghav? How they become friends? She wanted to know everything about herself. She tried really hard to remember any thing even a minute detail but no she was blank. Her mind was not supporting. For the first time she asked God why is she in such a state!!
"I don't know whether you have punished me or you have blessed me. Was my past filled with beautiful memories that now I remember nothing about it or is it that my past was dreadful that you made me forget it so as to start afresh. Only you know what my life had been and how is it going to shape up. Please guide me for I cannot trust anyone and to be honest not even myself. " A tear fell from her eye but she wiped it away and tried to sleep.
In the middle of the night:
They were in a car going somewhere when suddenly something came before their car, she screamed but soon all went dark.
Kalpana got up from her sleep. She was breathing heavily and was perspiring continously. Fear was written on her face. She was shivering. Hearing a heavy breathing Raghav who was in nearby room rushed into her room. He was shocked to see Kalpana in such a condition. She was sitting on her bed, her hands have tightly clutched the bed cover and she was crying out of fear.
"Kalpana!! Kalpana!!" she looked up at him he was holding her by her arms so scared she was that she hugged him tightly. Raghav was startled at first not knowing what to do or what to say. He thought of breaking the hug but then he heard her sobs and felt her shivering hands on his kurta. He cold sense that she was shivering and is scared. He immediately hugged her tightly as if asking her to release the fear she had. For few moments they remained in the same postion. Raghav was trying his best to calm her nerves while Kalpana slowly started relaxing in his arms. They remained in each others arms till Kalpana got her composure back.
Soon she realised in what position they were and broke the hug. She wiped her tears and took a deep breath and said in a slow tone "I am fine, thank you." She deliberately avoided eye contact with him. She was feeling embarrassed of her actions.
"Kalpana what happened? Why were you so scared? You were breathing heavily and...before Raghav could complete Kalpana said " I am fine , I just saw a bad dream you know nightmare thats it nothing much to worry about"
Raghav remembered Doc's words that she might get flashes of her accident. He asked " Kalpana is that all? Don't you think being a friend of yours you should tell me what is bothering you. I know you are lying to me...you are not fine. I can see that you are still scared its there in your eyes."
Kalpana looked at him. His eyes were carrying numerous questions. She didn't know what to say. She was confused whether it will be right on her part to discuss it with him. Her heart was asking her to share her problem with him but her mind was not ready. The conflict between heart and mind was evident on her face. Raghav was sitting there reading all her expressions. He felt bad or rather he was hurt of being rejected as friend by Kalpana.
Raghav stood up to leave, he knew he cannot force her to share her feelings with him. He started moving out of her room when she said
"Raghav!! Stop. I didn't mean to hurt you. Its just that..."she paused for a whie "I saw something very scary. It wasn't clear but still it was scary." She told him everything about her dream. Raghv closed his eyes. The guilt which was there in his heart,which had started to burry itself beneath the deep layers of his heart somewhere at the bottom came up all of a sudden at the mention of accident and was now reflecting on his face. Kalpana was holding Raghav's hand all through the while.
To his luck Kalpana couldn't read his guilt. She took it as his concern and worry for her. She asked "You were there Right. What exactly happened? Please let me know. Please"
Raghav thought at first to ignore her question and ask her to sleep. But then she had to be answered or else this question might haunt her and may lead to more question which he may find difficult to answer. "Kalpana look I will tell you everything but you have to promise me that you won't ask any further questions. Its not that I don't want to answer but I have said it before you need to recover first."
Kalpana nodded.
"We were returning from a party which I had thrown for my staff. While coming back even I don't know what came before the car since the reflexion of head light blurred my vision and after that even I don't remember anything. When I woke up I was on road with minor injuries. I managed to get up. My head was spinning badly. I felt as if the whole earth is revolving fastly. I thought of you I believed if I had escaped from such a big accident may be you too...but...and the rest is known to you."
"Kalpana I am SORRY!!" Raghav said lowering his head before her. " I am responsible for your current state. I failed to control the car."
Kalpana could feel the sincerity in his voice. She put her hand on his cheek. He looke at her, ber gaze was soft which reflected that she doesn't have any hard feelings for him. He took hold of her hand and apologised again. "Kalpana I am really really very SOR..."
"shh...you don't have to be sorry. It seems the accident was inevitable. Luck was on your and you ended up with minor injuries but what if luck had not supported you hmmm may be today we both would have been in the same position or may be mine could have been better than yours. Who knows... You are not responsible Raghav. Atleast I don't hold you responsible." Kalpana said with a warm smile.
Her smile made him feel lighter. Though guilt was still there for he has not told her the real reason... he has not told her about him staring at her instead of road and calling the danger himself. But her words soothed his wounds. The wounds which were not physical yet the pain was much more than a physical injury.
This conversation had broken another wall. Wall of hesitance in sharing their pain with each other. They manage to took another step towards their friendship.
Raghav asked her to sleep as now he has answered her question and also it was too late. Kalpana requested him to stay till she fall asleep for she was still afraid of recurrence of that dream. Raghav agreed to stay. She took his hand in hers and tried to sleep. Raghav was sitting on the bed resting his head on head board. After an hour when Raghav felt that Kalpana is fast asleep he tried to free his hand and move out of her room. Raghav tried to free his hand but Kalpana's grip on his hand was so tight that all his attempts failed. He didn't want to wake her up as that would be harmful for her health but then he cannot sleep here on the same bed besides her.
He tried to tussle a little but when Kalpana moved little slightly he stooped it. Accepting defeat, well not for the first time as he has a record of loosing against her, he adjusted the pillow behind his back and rested his head on board again. Moments later he too fell asleep.
Morning sun brought a new day in their lives. While Kalpana moved a lilttle ahead to trust him, Raghav too broke the walls, though not completely, he had built around him. His first step was accepting his mistake and apologising to her. He himself cannot remember when was the last time he accepted his mistake and apologised to anyone.
Sunrays fell on Kalpana's eyes thus bringing end to her peaceful sleep. She sloply opened her eyes and yawned. She turned around and got shocked. "Raghav!!" She screamed. He got uo immediately and startred asking her "kya hua tum thik ho haan. Answer me ya why did you scream?"
"What are you doing in my bed?" Kalpana questioned him.
He looked at her confusingly but soon realised the reason behind her anger. While asking her about her health he technically came all over her. He looked at her and met with his fuming eyes. They both stared at each other for a while when Kalpana asked "What are you doing here on my bed? I told you to stay only till I fall asleep not for the whole night."
Raghav lowered her eyes for a second and said "look at your waist."
Kalpana just saw him in anger. She couldn't believe it was him saying all this to her but Raghav said again "Please look"
Kalpana looked down to her waist. Her eyes widened at what she saw and she blinked frequently. It was she who was holding his hand tightly. She looked up at him and within a second lowered her eyes. She closed her eyes cursing herself for the stupidity.
"I tried a lot to free my hand but your grip was too tight and I didn't want to disturb you. I don't know when I slept besides you. I am sorry for crossing my limit." Raghav said.
" No its not you who should be sorry I am sorry for shouting at you like this."
" Its okay now free my hand I need to get up." She did so and soon Raghav went out of her room. Once he was out Kalpana tapped her forehead.
Days passed like this. Raghav helped Kalpana in walking. She used to take 2-3 steps on her own but soon loose her balance. But he was always there to support her. He never left her alone while practising. Business work use to take backseat when he helped her in walking. Raghav and Kalpana's friendship started blossoming.
After coming from office Raghav straight away headed towards her room. It had become his habit. It was now his everyday routine to discuss his day with hers while she use to discuss hers with him. He had bought various novels for her. Some were fictional while some of them were philosophical. They use to share each others view on philosophical onesand tried to understand it as well.
Both were giving each other their respective space and time to know well about one another and adjust accordingly.
The day came when it was time for Kalpana to get rid of wheel chair plus bandages. Raghav had taken off from his office. He had cancelled a very important meeting as he felt showing Kalpana to doctor was more important. Clients can wait.
They reached hospital. Raghav could see the excitement in her eyes. They met Doctor Jasraj. He examined her and said with a smile "Kalpana you are all well. The injuries have healed completely." While Kalpana tried to walk and this time successfully reached towards the chair without losing balance Dr. Jasraj continued "I can see that Mr Singhania has taken good care of you."
" Yes Doctor sometimes he goes out of his way to take care of me. I am lucky to have him as a friend." Kalpana said while looking at him. He was smiling on hearing his praises from her.
She asked "Doctor when will I get normal food."
Doctor laughed a little on listening and said "Only a fortnight has passed Kalpana. You ain't allowed anything apart from what is being given to you for another fortnight. After that we shall see."
Raghav coughed on hearing the last line. He thought what if even after a month she isn't allowed. God!!!
Kalpana asked for the sister who had taken care of her. She was called and both ladies went to the nearby cabin to talk with each other. The nurse was very happy on seeing a fully recovered Kalpana.
Here Raghav asked about Kalpana's health status. Doctor Jasraj assured him that her health is on right track but still she should not take any stress on her mind. Raghav asked him out of curiosity "Doc won't she be given proper food after another fortnight"
"Mr Singhania I have already said I cannot say anything right now."
Raghav and Kalpana headed towards home. Both of them were happy. Kalpana thought she is free and now her life won't be confined to a room. She can roam around freely in the whole house. Raghav was happy to see Kalpana in the same form as she was before accident. Though theres a change in her behaviour which even he doesn't know how long its gonna stay but he was happy. His heart use to wince in pain when he use to see her on wheel chair.
Unknown to him that his roller coaster ride is about to begin he drove off for home.
[THIS IS A MEMBERS ONLY POST]
The author of this post has chosen to restrict the content of this post to members only.
Kalpana was sleeping in her room but the medications were not of high dosage as it use to be when she was in hospital. It was the effect of sleeping pills that helped Kalpana to sleep calmly but now the medicines have changed. She was finding difficult to sleep.
She had lost her memory and as a human she was anxious to know what was her life prior to accident. What she was? How she use to live her life? How did she meet Raghav? How they become friends? She wanted to know everything about herself. She tried really hard to remember any thing even a minute detail but no she was blank. Her mind was not supporting. For the first time she asked God why is she in such a state!!
"I don't know whether you have punished me or you have blessed me. Was my past filled with beautiful memories that now I remember nothing about it or is it that my past was dreadful that you made me forget it so as to start afresh. Only you know what my life had been and how is it going to shape up. Please guide me for I cannot trust anyone and to be honest not even myself. " A tear fell from her eye but she wiped it away and tried to sleep.
In the middle of the night:
They were in a car going somewhere when suddenly something came before their car, she screamed but soon all went dark.
Kalpana got up from her sleep. She was breathing heavily and was perspiring continously. Fear was written on her face. She was shivering. Hearing a heavy breathing Raghav who was in nearby room rushed into her room. He was shocked to see Kalpana in such a condition. She was sitting on her bed, her hands have tightly clutched the bed cover and she was crying out of fear.
"Kalpana!! Kalpana!!" she looked up at him he was holding her by her arms so scared she was that she hugged him tightly. Raghav was startled at first not knowing what to do or what to say. He thought of breaking the hug but then he heard her sobs and felt her shivering hands on his kurta. He cold sense that she was shivering and is scared. He immediately hugged her tightly as if asking her to release the fear she had. For few moments they remained in the same postion. Raghav was trying his best to calm her nerves while Kalpana slowly started relaxing in his arms. They remained in each others arms till Kalpana got her composure back.
Soon she realised in what position they were and broke the hug. She wiped her tears and took a deep breath and said in a slow tone "I am fine, thank you." She deliberately avoided eye contact with him. She was feeling embarrassed of her actions.
"Kalpana what happened? Why were you so scared? You were breathing heavily and...before Raghav could complete Kalpana said " I am fine , I just saw a bad dream you know nightmare thats it nothing much to worry about"
Raghav remembered Doc's words that she might get flashes of her accident. He asked " Kalpana is that all? Don't you think being a friend of yours you should tell me what is bothering you. I know you are lying to me...you are not fine. I can see that you are still scared its there in your eyes."
Kalpana looked at him. His eyes were carrying numerous questions. She didn't know what to say. She was confused whether it will be right on her part to discuss it with him. Her heart was asking her to share her problem with him but her mind was not ready. The conflict between heart and mind was evident on her face. Raghav was sitting there reading all her expressions. He felt bad or rather he was hurt of being rejected as friend by Kalpana.
Raghav stood up to leave, he knew he cannot force her to share her feelings with him. He started moving out of her room when she said
"Raghav!! Stop. I didn't mean to hurt you. Its just that..."she paused for a whie "I saw something very scary. It wasn't clear but still it was scary." She told him everything about her dream. Raghv closed his eyes. The guilt which was there in his heart,which had started to burry itself beneath the deep layers of his heart somewhere at the bottom came up all of a sudden at the mention of accident and was now reflecting on his face. Kalpana was holding Raghav's hand all through the while.
To his luck Kalpana couldn't read his guilt. She took it as his concern and worry for her. She asked "You were there Right. What exactly happened? Please let me know. Please"
Raghav thought at first to ignore her question and ask her to sleep. But then she had to be answered or else this question might haunt her and may lead to more question which he may find difficult to answer. "Kalpana look I will tell you everything but you have to promise me that you won't ask any further questions. Its not that I don't want to answer but I have said it before you need to recover first."
Kalpana nodded.
"We were returning from a party which I had thrown for my staff. While coming back even I don't know what came before the car since the reflexion of head light blurred my vision and after that even I don't remember anything. When I woke up I was on road with minor injuries. I managed to get up. My head was spinning badly. I felt as if the whole earth is revolving fastly. I thought of you I believed if I had escaped from such a big accident may be you too...but...and the rest is known to you."
"Kalpana I am SORRY!!" Raghav said lowering his head before her. " I am responsible for your current state. I failed to control the car."
Kalpana could feel the sincerity in his voice. She put her hand on his cheek. He looke at her, ber gaze was soft which reflected that she doesn't have any hard feelings for him. He took hold of her hand and apologised again. "Kalpana I am really really very SOR..."
"shh...you don't have to be sorry. It seems the accident was inevitable. Luck was on your and you ended up with minor injuries but what if luck had not supported you hmmm may be today we both would have been in the same position or may be mine could have been better than yours. Who knows... You are not responsible Raghav. Atleast I don't hold you responsible." Kalpana said with a warm smile.
Her smile made him feel lighter. Though guilt was still there for he has not told her the real reason... he has not told her about him staring at her instead of road and calling the danger himself. But her words soothed his wounds. The wounds which were not physical yet the pain was much more than a physical injury.
This conversation had broken another wall. Wall of hesitance in sharing their pain with each other. They manage to took another step towards their friendship.
Raghav asked her to sleep as now he has answered her question and also it was too late. Kalpana requested him to stay till she fall asleep for she was still afraid of recurrence of that dream. Raghav agreed to stay. She took his hand in hers and tried to sleep. Raghav was sitting on the bed resting his head on head board. After an hour when Raghav felt that Kalpana is fast asleep he tried to free his hand and move out of her room. Raghav tried to free his hand but Kalpana's grip on his hand was so tight that all his attempts failed. He didn't want to wake her up as that would be harmful for her health but then he cannot sleep here on the same bed besides her.
He tried to tussle a little but when Kalpana moved little slightly he stooped it. Accepting defeat, well not for the first time as he has a record of loosing against her, he adjusted the pillow behind his back and rested his head on board again. Moments later he too fell asleep.
Morning sun brought a new day in their lives. While Kalpana moved a lilttle ahead to trust him, Raghav too broke the walls, though not completely, he had built around him. His first step was accepting his mistake and apologising to her. He himself cannot remember when was the last time he accepted his mistake and apologised to anyone.
Sunrays fell on Kalpana's eyes thus bringing end to her peaceful sleep. She sloply opened her eyes and yawned. She turned around and got shocked. "Raghav!!" She screamed. He got uo immediately and startred asking her "kya hua tum thik ho haan. Answer me ya why did you scream?"
"What are you doing in my bed?" Kalpana questioned him.
He looked at her confusingly but soon realised the reason behind her anger. While asking her about her health he technically came all over her. He looked at her and met with his fuming eyes. They both stared at each other for a while when Kalpana asked "What are you doing here on my bed? I told you to stay only till I fall asleep not for the whole night."
Raghav lowered her eyes for a second and said "look at your waist."
Kalpana just saw him in anger. She couldn't believe it was him saying all this to her but Raghav said again "Please look"
Kalpana looked down to her waist. Her eyes widened at what she saw and she blinked frequently. It was she who was holding his hand tightly. She looked up at him and within a second lowered her eyes. She closed her eyes cursing herself for the stupidity.
"I tried a lot to free my hand but your grip was too tight and I didn't want to disturb you. I don't know when I slept besides you. I am sorry for crossing my limit." Raghav said.
" No its not you who should be sorry I am sorry for shouting at you like this."
" Its okay now free my hand I need to get up." She did so and soon Raghav went out of her room. Once he was out Kalpana tapped her forehead.
Days passed like this. Raghav helped Kalpana in walking. She used to take 2-3 steps on her own but soon loose her balance. But he was always there to support her. He never left her alone while practising. Business work use to take backseat when he helped her in walking. Raghav and Kalpana's friendship started blossoming.
After coming from office Raghav straight away headed towards her room. It had become his habit. It was now his everyday routine to discuss his day with hers while she use to discuss hers with him. He had bought various novels for her. Some were fictional while some of them were philosophical. They use to share each others view on philosophical onesand tried to understand it as well.
Both were giving each other their respective space and time to know well about one another and adjust accordingly.
The day came when it was time for Kalpana to get rid of wheel chair plus bandages. Raghav had taken off from his office. He had cancelled a very important meeting as he felt showing Kalpana to doctor was more important. Clients can wait.
They reached hospital. Raghav could see the excitement in her eyes. They met Doctor Jasraj. He examined her and said with a smile "Kalpana you are all well. The injuries have healed completely." While Kalpana tried to walk and this time successfully reached towards the chair without losing balance Dr. Jasraj continued "I can see that Mr Singhania has taken good care of you."
" Yes Doctor sometimes he goes out of his way to take care of me. I am lucky to have him as a friend." Kalpana said while looking at him. He was smiling on hearing his praises from her.
She asked "Doctor when will I get normal food."
Doctor laughed a little on listening and said "Only a fortnight has passed Kalpana. You ain't allowed anything apart from what is being given to you for another fortnight. After that we shall see."
Raghav coughed on hearing the last line. He thought what if even after a month she isn't allowed. God!!!
Kalpana asked for the sister who had taken care of her. She was called and both ladies went to the nearby cabin to talk with each other. The nurse was very happy on seeing a fully recovered Kalpana.
Here Raghav asked about Kalpana's health status. Doctor Jasraj assured him that her health is on right track but still she should not take any stress on her mind. Raghav asked him out of curiosity "Doc won't she be given proper food after another fortnight"
"Mr Singhania I have already said I cannot say anything right now."
Raghav and Kalpana headed towards home. Both of them were happy. Kalpana thought she is free and now her life won't be confined to a room. She can roam around freely in the whole house. Raghav was happy to see Kalpana in the same form as she was before accident. Though theres a change in her behaviour which even he doesn't know how long its gonna stay but he was happy. His heart use to wince in pain when he use to see her on wheel chair.
Unknown to him that his roller coaster ride is about to begin he drove off for home.
[THIS IS A MEMBERS ONLY POST]
The author of this post has chosen to restrict the content of this post to members only.
Ganesh Kartikeya
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