New SS on Ragna-Chap 34 updated on page 113- No PM - Page 60

HEARTY CONGRATS FOR THE SUPER DUPER CENTURY.

Raghav again holds her extended hand firmly. Friends Again? His inner-self mocks him. Does he want her as his friend? He knows the answer. He can't treat her as his friend. She is his life, his love. He wants to love her. He wants to be loved by her. He wants to hug her tightly and wants to forget whole world in her eyes. But she treats him either as her husband or as her friend. He has become her duty. This is mockery of his destiny. When she loved him, he did not understand his love for her. When he loves her, she can't see his love. He can't express how he is dying to see a glimpse of love in her eyes.

Kalpana is standing at her place like a statue as Raghav is not leaving her hand. She can see variety of expressions in his eyes. She closes her eyes. She does not want to see it.

Neel and hiya's voice break their trance and Kalpana leaves from there hastily leaving behind a perplexed Raghav. Kalpana rushes to the washroom and breaks down. Flashes of her past are still haunting her.

I love u- Everyone leaves me-please don't leave me- I need you- I love u kalpi - u killed my trisha - I will destroy you - it happens in pregnancy - your family will support you in every decision - look at that characterless girl - Kalpana can't be a mother again.

She places her palms on her both ears. The bitter truth of her past is not leaving her. She is still unable to forget all those moments. She remembers when she takes Hiya in her arms first time. How she forgot every sorrows of her life seeing her smiling face and she had given her the name Chahat', a name which Trisha wanted to give her own baby. She and Trisha used to chat over so many random things and in one of their conversation; Trisha revealed that she would call her baby girl as Chahat' i.e. loved and she named her child Chahat' as she is in this world because Raghav's love for Trisha. May be he was hallucinating her as Trisha in his inebriated state after losing contract to Kapoors and maybe he was pleading to Trisha not to leave him. And she had submitted herself to him. Nothing can be more insulting than this for a woman. She had lived 10 years loathing her own self for loving Raghav, for trusting him.

She splashes cold water on her face again and again. She sees herself in mirror. Today she is aware of one more truth, a truth which has shaken her hatred. She accidentally discovers Trisha's diary and gets to know that it is she whom Raghav always loves. Raghav always loved her but he was unaware of his own feelings. Raghav himself destroyed the Kalpana whom he loves and now he is trying to find her. But it is not easy. She knows it. She can't be that Kalpana again. She can't trust him in same way. But she still loves him in same way. She loved him; she loves him and will always love him. This is the reason she can't move in her life in these 10 years. She was still at same place where she left him. Biggest irony of their life is that they can love each other but can't trust each other. Their relation will be always incomplete.

Her reflection starts laughing on her. Kalpana looks at it surprised. Her reflection speaks - you people are so stupid. You always remember the bad things happened to you. You so easily forget good thing. You remember that Raghav cheated you and did not remember his love.'

It was all a drama'- Kalpana retorts back.

But his love is a truth'- her reflection says.

It does not matter now. He never trusted me.'- Kalpana speaks.

Like you did not trust him for Neel' - Reflection argues.

Neel is just a small child and I can't see him in pain' - Kalpana defends.

Trisha is Raghav's best friend. He also loved her'- reflection speaks.

Yes his love for Trishe won over my love for him. He destroyed me. He had snatched my innocence.' - Kalpana shouts.

And he gave you a reason to live, Your Chahat. Stop blaming yourself and raghav. You both love each other. Accept this truth and embrace him'- reflection speaks in heavy low tone.

Kalpana does not know what to say.

Life is too precious to waste in hatred. You have wasted 10 precious years hating him and he is repenting from 10 last years. But this 10 years will be worth if you start afresh. Raghav loves you and you also love him. Trust him again. He is a good man. You know it. You can feel it. Why are you not accepting it - Reflection speaks again.

If he cheats me, If he does not trust me again' - Kalpana speaks.

You know the answer Kalpana but you are not ready to accept it. Give your mind some rest. Listen to your heart'- Her reflection suggests.

It is not easy'- Kalpana murmurs.

It is not hard either' - her reflection speaks.

Our relation can't be complete. It can't be same. Our love can't be perfect.' - Kalpana Says.

But still there will be love. May be it is imperfect but love is there' - Reflection argues.

Kalpana remembers the moment she had spent with Raghav - Their first date, First bike ride, Raghav fighting with goons for Kalpana, their marriage, their banter, unknowingly hugging Raghav. She remembers herself shouting on Raghav , her family with Raghav, hiya and Neel. There are so many happy memories with Raghav .

Note :

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I am really busy these days. Work pressure and helping my 2 friends for their marriage preparation etc etc. I never want to write something for the sake of writing. So, I really have to struggle a lot to write updates so that I can meet your expectation. I know it is short but I hope it is not bad.