ragna os-KAISA YEH PYAR HAI completed LAST PART 3 PG 2

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Natasha

@...Natasha...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#21

Amazing update
I want to kill that Prem
But I like how Kalpi put him down herself :)
Possessive Raghav is too much fun

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Mihika

@Mihika

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#22

what an update..truly👏👏prem being insulted🤣🤣and that manager😆..good job👏

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I am Madara. I am Kira.

@Pein

Beginner

Posted: 11 years ago

#23

This could be a good fic.

But I have problems with it:

1. Sentence structure

2. Run on sentences

3. Spelling

4. Grammatical errors such as; ''you need to use quotation marks when characters are interacting with each other'', commas(,) are being misused and are scattered all over.

5. Switching of point of view is very confusing, Person A-Person B-Person A-Person B.

6. No description whatsoever, you do realize this right?!

7. There's no flow of conversation.

8. Characters were OOC

9. (...) was unnecessary. Just use a full stop and start a new sentence. Or a comma and continue the sentence.

10. Paragraphs.

11. You're writing in one language(English) so stick to it.

12. Names should be in capital letters.

I could go on but I'll stop, honestly you need to word out and space out your story 'cause its all over the place. Play with your words and don't use things like (omg, min, despo) it makes your work unattractive. For example: ''Its just 8 o'clock Sasuke, I'm sure Itachi will be here any min now.''

See that looks unattractive. It should look like this, ''Its just eight o'clock Sasuke, I'm sure Itachi will be here any minute now.'' Notice how I spelled out the digit eight(8), numbers as well do tend to make stories unattractive basically its all about quality. Every story must have quality.

Nothing personal, its just some basic tips. No need to get upset over this. :)

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OmkaraKiParvati

@OmkaraKiParvati

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 11 years ago

#24

Update soon Jennice... Waiting for Part 3... Wow... Tis is awesum...

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Not available

@Wj.mad

Navigator

Posted: 11 years ago

#25

awesome update.
It was so good just like my pizza
varun malhotra u better watch out. Kalpi sirf raghav ke hai.
di jaldi update karo.

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suhani.rahman

@suhani.rahman

Navigator

Posted: 11 years ago

#26

Updete soon dear 😊 Desperately waiting for next part

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dreamyjennice

@dreamyjennice

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

#27

Guys finally this is is completed. I have updated the final part. Hope u guys like it.

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dreamyjennice

@dreamyjennice

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

#28

Guys go ahead and plz am waiting for big big comments

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blackdollphin

@blackdollphin

Voyager

Posted: 11 years ago

#29

awww so cute yaar... RagNa together... thank u so much for the update... loved it and the end was just superb :)
Keep writing in more... wud luv to read them :))))))))

Edited by blackdollphin - 11 years ago

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dreamyjennice

@dreamyjennice

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

#30

Originally posted by: blackdollphin
Loved it... :)))) very well described and situational... Plz wrute more... And ur effort is more than appreciatable dear<3<3<3<3<3<3

thank a lot

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ragna os-KAISA YEH PYAR HAI completed LAST PART 3 PG 2 - Page 3

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