Cheating

I have two questions related to the subject matter.

Question TYPE 1.

If you found out that your spouse was cheating on you (emotionally or physically) what would you do?

If he asked for forgiveness and promised to not do it again would you accept him or her back? What if kids were in the picture?

Would you be more or less forgiving if it was a one night stand vs. an on going thing with another person?

Question TYPE 2.

Why do you think men or woman cheat? It is because the are not satisfied in their relationship (emotionally or physically) or are they just looking for an opportunity and are greedy?

Do you believe that a man or a woman can truly love his or her spouse, and still end up cheating on them? In other words, just because they cheated doesn't mean that they don't love their spouse.

If you feel that cheating is different for men and woman, please state your view points.

Originally posted by: peaches

Question TYPE 2.

Why do you think men or woman cheat? It is because the are not satisfied in their relationship (emotionally or physically) or are they just looking for an opportunity and are greedy?

Do you believe that a man or a woman can truly love his or her spouse, and still end up cheating on them? In other words, just because they cheated doesn't mean that they don't love their spouse.

If you feel that cheating is different for men and woman, please state your view points.

There are many reasons why men and women cheat. First, cheating is glorified on television and films (Desperate Housewives, Kkusum, most daytime soaps, Masti, Murder) Its portrayed as something exciting and adventerous. I guess some people get bored with their marriage and/or spouse and decide to engage in an extra martial affair. I think its a combination of boredom and greed. Maybe an affair can help someone get ahead in their professional career (stupid) Or maybe the spouse doesn't give enough time or care to the other spouse. These are some situations that are portrayed on TV and films. Whether they are true or not is open to debate.

About love- I don't know. This is a difficult question. Everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect. It depends on why the husband or wife cheated on the spouse.

Cheating should NOT be treated differently for men or women. In almost all societies, men are never blamed for cheating because its seen as a 'manly' thing. If a women cheats, she is considered is 'bad' person (can't use the word on the forum) On TV, the 'other' women is always seen as an evil person, the one who lures the husband into the affair. And this is true everywhere, not just in South Asian countries.

If you found out that your spouse was cheating on you (emotionally or physically) what would you do?

This indeed is a very difficult question to answer and i'm sure you'll get alot of different answers because everyone is different and everyone functions in a different value system. For me the most important aspect of a relationship or marriage is trust, trust is the thread that holds the marriage together and if trust is broken then the marriage is broken in itself. For me it would be virtually impossible to live or stay married to a person who has cheated on me, it would be a hurt , a betrayal beyond comprehension !!!!!!It would be a dent in my integrity, my wholesomeness, my worth , my pride, a blow from which i would never be able to recover. I am married and i dont know how to explain to you ( i gather you are unmarried???) how much trust and faith a wife or husband puts in his/her spouse, it is on this trust that you lay the foundation of your marriage, the whole infrastructure of your relationship and if this very trust were to be broken the pain and agony would be unfathomable.

For me my life would cease to have any meaning and the humiliation would be something i would never forgive my husband for, I may sound harsh but i would Never be able to forgive altho' i know forgiveness in itself is a virtue. To carry on with him from that point onwards would be impossible. Some people would say that it would be best for the kids if the parents did'nt divorce but in my eyes a child is better off if the parents

seperated peacefully than live in a house full of distrust, regrets and unpleasant vibes. I would live and perhaps live beautifully for the sake of my children but putting myself in that position right now i think love and trust would not be a part of my dictionary ever again. You never know what life has in store and people do love again but this is a hurt that would shatter my world.As for the man who cheats, i have little hope that he will ever change, A leopard never changes its spots and once a cheater always a cheater!!!

well i feel that cheating at every point of time is becoz of both the partners.