Indians marrying foreigners...is it alright?

Page

Shruthi

@Leo

Inactive

Posted: 17 years ago

Hmm....I have seen many Indians marrying foreigners....mostly, i have noticed that these marriages don't work...like for eg..neena gupta married some west indian cricketer...and then divorced...my distaaaaant cousin married a scottish man...the marriage is going fine as of now...i hope it does...

but i wonder...why do these marriages fail...? there are so many questions in mind...divorces are like soo huge in america....n....britain.....is it the failure of commitment from the man's side...or cultural difference?......😕

these marriages last only for a few years....and then they have kids and then one day BHAM! the evil divorce virus strikes them and they separate... it affects the children a lot...

Indians n Asians are commited (mostly)...atleast if i am not wrong....Indians dun separate for the sake of their children...and stay married for like 50 years with one spouse..!😃

I am not taking sides...as i know that stars like saif n aamir have had a troubled relationship for unknown reasons...

just imagine a situation...some guy (foreigner) comes up to you and says that he loves u ....i said...just imagine!....and well...u also had some feelings for him....what would u say..? you have many questions in mind...is he faking it? will he be commited? how do u manage such a situation..?

is it right to marry someone who is not from the same country?(if ur parents agree.)

i hope u guys must have got some idea as to what i am trying to convey....😊

I am not sure if this is debate...but I guess there are many of my opinions that you guys will contradict(obviously!😃)

Quote

Frequent Posters

Sana

@Sabah

Voyager

Posted: 17 years ago

Well i think cultural differences have a lot to do with these divorces. I think that it could work looking at a few marraiges from close if both are willing to work out their problems.

Just like in any marraige there is a lot of give and take and thats just how it works.

I think the real problem is that there are too many divorces period. And that my friend is the real strong hard hitting problem, many ppl have one or 2 differences and right away they want a divorce. Ppl have forgotten how it is to just calm down and wok things out.

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

Yeah

@Yeah

Dazzler

Posted: 17 years ago

Yeahh...I guess cultural differences could be a factor...but that could have been the determining factor if ppl who married in the same culture didn't have problems. So obviously it's something else.

I don't understand how ppl can just separate...I mean...

You're not always compatible with your parents or ur sister or brother when say ur 15....doesn't mean you go to the court asking for a divorce...like Gosh man...you married...you're stuck...you took vows...how can a signature undo such strong vows...

If liberation means forgetting about promises, and attributes such as faith and trust....I'd rather not have liberation.

Anyways...I think inter-culutural marriages are cool....jus recently I had 3 cousins marry white ppl...

I mean they must've found something that they fell in love...nd plus they've always lived in an env with more white ppl than brown...so obv they would be more compatible with white ppl than brown ppl.

I guess when you fall in love, nothing else matters.

Quote

Shruthi

@Leo

Inactive

Posted: 17 years ago

Ya..u made a sensible statement..when u r in love...nothing else matters...!

and ...i hope ur cousins lead a happy life..! 😊

Quote

SholaJoBhadkey

@SholaJoBhadkey

Dazzler

Posted: 17 years ago

Straight from the horse's mouth 😉 - it's fantastic 😆

Quote

Jasmine

@jasmine_triv

Inactive

Posted: 17 years ago

My cousin ran away from home and married a white guy. I guess this was the best thing for her because at the time as she didn't know how to cook Indian food and wasn't really into the culture. Her husband was really sweet and came to all the religious functions and parties and was really accepting of our culture.

Unfortunately though after more than 12 years of marriage they split up and now their daughter lives with the dad and son lives with the mum. But I don't think its to do with the fact that he's a foreigner I just think they grew apart.

Quote

367848

Suspended

Posted: 17 years ago

I donot think there is any harm in marrying someone you love, Whether an Indian or a foreigner, Intermarriages had been there for ages, Anglo Indians are born via this wedlock. Don't you think there are more divorces in india now even after marrying an indian. I know an indian married to an english girl have a son, very happy marriage. These girls try very hard to please the families and relatives of her married husbands. Here everything is taken for granted. Donot take me wrong If you are happy then a marriage is a marriage, No matter who the husband or wife is.

Quote

Arun - <--haa ji meri tasveer hai

@AsliiGuy

Dazzler

Posted: 17 years ago

Originally posted by: RAJAYE_HIND
I donot think there is any harm in marrying someone you love, Whether an Indian or a foreigner, Intermarriages had been there for ages, Anglo Indians are born via this wedlock. Don't you think there are more divorces in india now even after marrying an indian. I know an indian married to an english girl have a son, very happy marriage. These girls try very hard to please the families and relatives of her married husbands. Here everything is taken for granted. Donot take me wrong If you are happy then a marriage is a marriage, No matter who the husband or wife is.

Good words!

As long as there is love, thats all that matters i think...

Now Its up to the person, we cant really tell anyone to marry a certain group etc.. Especially now that the world is moving into a modern phase....

I know some friends who cant marry out of thier own background/region where they come from, and some friends who cant marry outside their culture etc...

Its like someone living the rich city life, electronics everywhere, cars, houses, big job, all of a suddent he falls in love with a farm girl on the country side in the middle of no where, lifestyles dont matter, only love from there on...but Its up to the person, I think as long as there is trueeee love, they can overcome all troubles, even if its two different worlds...

Quote

return_to_hades

@return_to_hades

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 17 years ago

Marriage is about love, and if two people fall in love why not. The reason why inter cultural marriages sometimes fail because the two people come from extremely contrasting backgrounds and different perceptions of life, society, marriage and family. Despite genuine love and commitment overcoming these differences can be daunting for people.

Asian culture tends to be very collectivist and individuals sacrifice for the sake of the family. To westerners this lack of privacy and personal decision making is baffling. Westerners on the other hand are very self reliant and independent. To Asians this can come off to be selfish and self centered. Overcoming these cultural differences is the key to a successful marriage.

I am happy to say that in my close and extended family there have been people who have married outside Hinduism to Catholics and Muslims, there have been people who married different nationalities British, American, Chinese, German etc, there have been people married to different communities Punjabis, Gujaratis, Bengalis. While there have been a few divorces majority of them have been highly happy and successful with some even celebrating many anniversaries together and still going.

Recently I heard one of my very distant cousin sisters was engaged to a girl in India. Although thats not going well, there is always a first to everything.

Quote

anshuman83

@anshuman83

Beginner

Posted: 17 years ago

#10

Originally posted by: Leo
Hmm....I have seen many Indians marrying foreigners....mostly, i have noticed that these marriages don't work...like for eg..neena gupta married some west indian cricketer...and then divorced...my distaaaaant cousin married a scottish man...the marriage is going fine as of now...i hope it does...

but i wonder...why do these marriages fail...? there are so many questions in mind...divorces are like soo huge in america....n....britain.....is it the failure of commitment from the man's side...or cultural difference?......😕

these marriages last only for a few years....and then they have kids and then one day BHAM! the evil divorce virus strikes them and they separate... it affects the children a lot...

Indians n Asians are commited (mostly)...atleast if i am not wrong....Indians dun separate for the sake of their children...and stay married for like 50 years with one spouse..!😃

I am not taking sides...as i know that stars like saif n aamir have had a troubled relationship for unknown reasons...

just imagine a situation...some guy (foreigner) comes up to you and says that he loves u ....i said...just imagine!....and well...u also had some feelings for him....what would u say..? you have many questions in mind...is he faking it? will he be commited? how do u manage such a situation..?

is it right to marry someone who is not from the same country?(if ur parents agree.)

i hope u guys must have got some idea as to what i am trying to convey....😊

I am not sure if this is debate...but I guess there are many of my opinions that you guys will contradict(obviously!😃)

it's not at all because of cultural differences...if you talking about we indians getting married to foreigners..let me tell you it's got to be a love marriage..we speak of imitating the west..but haven't gone that far..to let our parents fix us up with a white skinned guy..

marriage is all about understanding...and if it fails it's got to be either the women or the man...could be both too..so lets not be bias and blame them:)...infact..this is one sensitive topic..it should not have been brought up in the first place...

mod...please lock it!!!

Quote

Indians marrying foreigners...is it alright?

Related Topics

Explore Topics