Whether or Not?- A short story - Page 2

Originally posted by: bluetides

Riya,

Yes BT,

Great point and the tone is maintained through out the story..

hmm..

Here are the most touched lines

this set is now not just a workplace to them, it has become like their second home...a home with family members, emotions, feelings, laugh, fun, smile, tears and sadness and not with just four concrete walls...

still he was not aware why he was so upset, this wasn't his real life or was it..!

Do you agree or disagree, i mean what's your opinion, yes or no?

.(he smiled thinking about expectations)...

those hesitations of the first day, those wishes of "you can do it", those encouragements, that happiness of making a record..

.aakhir 17 saal ka yeh rishta inse bhi toh hai...

Aditya(laughing).. "aapko badhi jaldi hai sir..aap phir show mein ladenge kisse, aur itna sabh kuch kisse kahenge, bas issiliye main nahi chodhta.."

.meri zindagi shayad mujhse jyada toh abhijeet ki hai..

The way you tried to capture an actors attachment with his character is really 👏👏
Biggest fan for Abhi can only be Adi sir...

thanks a lot dear for liking it, i just wanted to show how much an actor is hurt when his character which he has been playing for 17 years is ruined and is ignored for some new comers, NOM to the fans of new comers..

very true..👏 VEry well said BT..

Here are few things that I might suggest you to improve..

1. Don't make sentences long. Some sentences are 3 to 4 lines long which usually decreases readability. Feel free to break them. It's a good writing practice.

2. Start new paragraph with a tab. Really appreciate how you ended an paragraph. Whole paragraph had same tone.

3. Some editing could be possible. I know you are in love with each letter you write. But after you are done, you need to revise it with editor shoes.

I will surely keep them in mind from next time dear, i really like it that you giving an honest feedback..👏

I would say, You deserve 95/100 for this.

Thank you, yes i got A1 guys..😆

Other titles that could match:
1. The attachment
2. Am I actually him?
3. An Actors dilemma

Thanks a lot for the suggestions BT, i thought of the second one but i think i was away from this from quite a long time, so just abandoned it, but i like the 1'st one a lot, will change the title of the story as soon as i can...😛

Originally posted by: nsapo

What about The Question?

Originally posted by: Abhi-Anamika

Riyu,kamaal kar diya tumne.excellent.😊
first time i have read a story here.
Itni kam age me itni achhi story...great...bahut aage jaogi dear.good luck.👍🏼
aaj mujhe 2 bar rona aya.ek wo TB ka article or ek tumari story padhkar.really heart touching😭

Originally posted by: binod.abhijeet

@riyu i m so emotionally linked with your writing..it's your first attempt and so oustanding work..keep it up dear.

Originally posted by: iMini

I am senti...

nice ..very very nice dear.👏

Originally posted by: gadhadada

Out of Box Work Baccha...⭐️⭐️⭐️

its really Beyond Praising and Appreciation...👏👏👏

Sometimes the Words did not play the actual Role...😉😉😉

only Gestures, Actions and yes Emotions...

so a Standing ovation with showers of Dua, Wishes, Regards and Compliments from My side...🥳

A Big and Humble Thank you from Bottom of Heart...🤗

may Almight ALLAH Paak gives U more such Skills, Talent, Success with Health, happiness, Peace and Love ones... aameen...🤗

Jeeti raho aur hamesha Khush raho, kaamyaabiyaan sameto... aameen..🤗

Originally posted by: Neela-khan

Very nice n lovely riyu dear.

Originally posted by: kkkloveu

Which question apoorva?

IS it.. "why Adi sir is not leaving CID?"